Stray

by scorchalives

It's only been a few months since the events that changed Ponyboy's life forever, and now his growing relationsip with Cherry Valence will force him to make yet another life changing decision.

6. All Yours

All Yours:

CHERRY: "Sherri, what's the matter?" my mother asked, her shadow blocking out the light spreading out from underneath my closed door. "You know you can tell me if something's bothering you. You haven't been yourself for a while now. I'm starting to worry about you."

Really, Mom? Four months go by and it takes you that long to start to worry about me? You really are a wonderful parent, really. I sighed and wiped my hand across my nose, sniffing back tears and praying to God that she'd leave me alone.

"Sherri, I'm really getting tired of your attitude. We have a trip planned out next week to visit Brown and if you don't get over yourself, young lady, you can kiss that college money good-bye."

"Then why don't you go there? Seeing as you're the one always talking about that Goddamn place, you might as well!" I shouted out at her, turning over on my side and burying my face in my pillow.

"That is it! I have had it! I'm taking your car away for the rest of this month! And no more going out! You're grounded for the next two weeks!"

"Fine, not like any of that matters, anyway," I muttered, bringing my knees up to my chest and shivering despite the warmth of my bed. I could still smell Ponyboy in the sheets, could still feel the warmth he had left behind there. Had it really been four months? It didn't feel like it, but it also felt like an eternity. An eternity since I had heard him laugh and been to the lot where we'd talk for hours about nothing at all. I missed being able to tell him things that I couldn't tell Marcia or Randy or anyone else. He had been the only one to know all my secrets, everything I kept hidden underneath the surface. If anything, I missed knowing that he cared, and that he'd be there to love me and understand why I felt the way I did. He could do some serious blackmail on me, but I don't think he'd do something like that. He may have killed every part of me, but he wouldn't do that.

I rolled over onto my back before I sat up and sighed, glancing over at my phone, wishing somehow it would ring, I'd answer, and Ponyboy would be on the other end asking me to come to our lot to watch the stars or some other dumb things like that. He had always been deep like that, watching sunsets and reciting poetry. If I didn't know him better I'd guess he was gay. I smiled at that a bit despite myself, and I quickly frowned remembering how he'd left me so easily that night. He'd literally walked out on me, not caring what happened to me afterwards or if I'd even miss him. I felt my face quiver as tears began to well in my eyes, making my throat swell and choke me. God, why did I have to cry so damn much? It was driving me crazy that I couldn't stop myself. In class the other day, Mr. Hanson had asked me which wife Henry VIII had had beheaded first and I had broken down into tears for no reason. He was controlling me and he had no idea of it. Everything inside me kept telling me to hate him, to stop feeling anything for him, but I couldn't stop hoping he'd come back and be the same loving Pony that I had known before. It was all too much to ask for it seemed. And now that—

I was startled by the ringing of my phone, and I quickly composed myself and picked up the receiver, forcing myself to answer a quiet "hello."

"Cherry?"

It was faint, almost distant, and I wondered for a moment if I was dreaming. I let out a hallow breath before whispering, "P-P-Po-oo-nyboy?"

There was slight chuckle and rustling of breath against the receiver before he spoke again. "Yeah…yeah, it's me. Cherry…I, uh..."

"Yes?" I breathed, my heart hanging on every word he had just spoken.

"Um…I, uh, wanted to know if…ah…well, ya know, if you…" He was silent for the longest time, and I gripped the phone, hoping he was still there. Finally he said, "I wanted to know if you were still mad at me. For what I did to you, that is."

I felt my heart jump up into my throat and then plummet into the pit of my stomach. What did he just say? Was I still mad at him? Was I still MAD at him? God fucking dammit! Hell YES, I was still FUCKING MAD AT HIM! Why the hell wouldn't I be?

"Um…Cherry? Are you still there? Look, I know what I did was wrong and all, and I shouldn't have done it, but you gotta understand, I was just—"

"I 'just gotta understand'?" I hissed, staring down at the phone as I spoke. "Just gotta understand? I understand plenty! Look here, you! You manage to ruin the past four months of my life by not saying a single word to me or even looking at me, and all you have to say for yourself is that I just gotta understand!"

"Cherry, would you just listen for a second?" he argued, his voice raising a bit on the line. "I did it for your own good. You know no one 'round here wants to see a Soc and a Grease together. Hell, just look at Two-Bit and Nikki! Or Dally and Arisa! He gets shot, and she falls off the face of the Earth! It could happen to us, Cherry! Do you want that to happen? Do you want to end up like Nikki, working a dead-end job for money that doesn't cover half the bills and then have people who used to go to the movies with you throw beer cans at you for being with a Greaser? You deserve so much better than me, Cherry. Goddamn, you live in a fancy house and drive a Stingray. You've got the world at your feet and you're wasting it with me! I'm not worth it, Cherry. I'm a dumbass bum who's gonna end up working two jobs to try and support a family that's barely gettin' by and be wishing he could have gone to college and had real nice things and done a whole lot more with his life. And you…you, you're gonna be livin' half-way across the country in a nice house with a husband who can give you everything and kids that'll love you and never have to ask you why there isn't anything to eat for dinner that night. Kids who won't ever have to know what it's like to be beaten and looked down upon just cause they ain't got much. You don't want me, Cherry. I can't give you anything but a life wishing you'd chosen somethin' else. Cause if you stay with me that's all you'll be doin'. Wonderin' why you stuck around for this shit-hole. I won't let you give it all up for me."

I was breaking down in tears by then, and I couldn't stop myself. He was right. I had known Arisa and Nikki when they had lived down the street from me and Bob. Arisa had been beautiful, the embodiment of Bridgette Bardot, blonde hair and all. She had been the best dancer in Tulsa, and everyone knew she'd go on to be the greatest in the country, maybe even the world. Nikki was her best friend, and was one of those girls who you instantly wanted to be friends with. She just had that air about her. And for reasons we could never understand, they had left our perfect, sheltered neighborhood to live with the worst people imaginable. When I learned that Arisa had gotten with Dallas Winston, I had been appalled and hurt at the same time. I'd always had a bit of a crush on Dallas, one that not even Ponyboy knew about, and even more than that, I was surprised that he'd fallen so hard for her. I'd seen them every now and again at the Dairy Queen, his arm around her, his jacket oversized one her shoulders, and it made me sick inside. I watched them in disgust, and it wasn't until after I heard Dally had been shot and I cried for weeks that I knew it wasn't because he was a Greaser and she was a Soc. It was because I'd secretly hoped that if they could be together, then maybe I might be able to find a way to break free from the hold my parents had on me and live my own life for once. And Arisa- beautiful, talented Arisa- was never seen or heard from again. Dallas dying had been my dream of leaving dying with him. But then I found Ponyboy again, beaten and alone, crying out for help with no one to hear him…just like me. It had taken me a while to realize that I had loved him ever since I had met him that night at the drive-in, when he'd showed me that there's more to a person that what they wear or how they get by. I'd always been in love with the idea of rebellion, and I caught a glimmer of it in Dallas Winston, but with Ponyboy…it was all him. It had always been, and always would be, him and no one else.

I gripped the handle of the phone before sobbing into his ear. "Don't you see that I don't care about any of that? I don't care if I have to give up everything I have here because it's NOTHING! I'd rather spend my life with you than having to cut out my heart every night only to find its grown back in the morning. I don't want to live without you, and I don't want to raise our baby without you either!"

I could feel his breath shake on the other line, and I tasted the tears leaking into my mouth as I waited for his response. Say something, dammit! Say something! Anything! I don't give a good God damn, just say something! Please!

"Pony?" I said, holding my breath and then letting it out in a gasp. "Did you hear what I said?"

There was another long pause before I heard him speak. "Yeah…yeah, I heard what you said. And you're not gonna be alone, Cher. I'll be with you. I'll always be with you. It took me a while to realize what a complete asshole I've been, but now…now, I guess none of that really matters. Cause no matter what anyone says, that baby's gonna love both of us, Greaser and Soc. I'm not much of a man, Cherry, but I do know when I've been wrong. I'm sorry. I really am. I want you. All of you. I'm not going anywhere…I promise you that."

I pursed my lips together, tears spilling from my eyes. "Yeah, I know all about your promises, Ponyboy Curtis," I teased, wishing I could kiss him right then through the telephone.

He let out a low laugh. "Huh, yeah, sorry about that. But I'm serious. I swear on my life, I'm not leaving you."

I grinned through the tears spilling over my cheeks and kissed the mouth of the phone. "You always were too deep for your own good, Ponyboy."

PONYBOY: I hung up the phone quietly that night, my head trying to make sense of everything that had passed in those few moments. Cherry; a baby; together; was it all possible? I guess so. I sat down on the couch next to Two-Bit and Nikki, who were curled up, Nikki asleep and Two-Bit sipping on a beer watching Mickey Mouse. I ran my hands through my hair and sighed, closing one eye and staring at Two-Bit with the other. He raised a brow at me and I only smiled.

"I've only got one thing to say to you: Shut it," I said, leaning back against the couch and closing my eyes. "And, Two-Bit? Thanks. I guess you're not as useless as I thought." I grinned and peeked at him with one eye, just before he punched me in the arm.

"You're lucky she's asleep, you little grease-ball," he said, taking a swig of his beer. "So what happened with you and Cherry? Something good, I gather."

I raised my eyebrows and crossed my arms before turning my head to him and saying, "Let's just say I'm gonna be looking for a job pretty soon."

CHERRY: We're together again…and it doesn't seem real. I curl myself up in a ball and wrap my arms around myself, hugging the life growing inside of me…the other part of Pony living inside of me. I was all his and he was all mine. And we'd be together to face whatever came our way…always.

Other lives always tempted to trade
Will they hate me for all the choices I've made
Will they stop when they see me again?
I can't stop now I know who I am

Now I'm all yours, I'm not afraid
And you're all mine, say what they may
And all your love I'll take to the grave
And all my life starts now

Tear me down they can't take you out of my thoughts
Under every scar there's a battle I've lost
Will they stop when they see us again?
I can't stop now I know who I am

Now I'm all yours, I'm not afraid
And you're all mine, say what they may
And all your love I'll take to the grave
And all my life starts

I'm all yours, I'm not afraid
And you're all mine, say what they may
And all your love I'll take to a grave
And all my life starts starts now