J

J is for Jerk. Jackass. Jackass was Veronica's preferred word to describe Logan's less desirable, less positive behaviors. She used it so much it became part of the vernacular for all her friends. Jackass. But Mac preferred Jerk.

Dick was a Jerk. He made jerky jokes, jerky decisions, jerky choices. He took out his anger and frustration on others. But the jokes were good and the jerky choices were fun. And people looking at Dick thought he was having a good time. They thought if they hung out with him that they'd have a good time too. And they were partially right.

On the surface Dick was living, living for today, not thinking about yesterday or tomorrow. But in reality to do that, Dick had to lock up so much of himself that he wasn't living at all. He was just passing the time, passing from one substance and situation that could numb him to another.

J is for Jokes. After rehab, even as Dick managed to reintegrate the parts of his life he had tried so hard to forget, he made jokes. Maybe that lightness of spirit, then need to point out the ridiculousness of others was just a part of him. But the jokes changed. Instead of being intended to hurt and put people down, they became about humor. Sharing that humor. The jokes were funny now. Funny without being hurtful. And Mac was laughing.

J is for Jet lag. Mac never thought that she would go on a date that included Jet lag.

Dick went low key for their first date. They had dinner at Mac's favorite vegan restaurant then walked around until they found a café that looked inviting and went inside and drank coffee and talked until midnight.

For their second date, they went to the Museum of Photographic Art in Balboa Park. Walking around looking at the pictures with Dick's constantly streaming commentary in her ear, Mac had a hard time keeping her laughter pitched low enough not to annoy the other patrons. They had dinner at the Prado afterwards, and talked until the restaurant closed.

Mac didn't know how they had so much to talk about, they talked all the time, but there was always something more to say. For the most part they skimmed over the top of painful memories, those were conversations they held in private. Alone somewhere. Somewhere they could be protected and vulnerable. Together. But not on dates. Dates were for flirting and banter and getting to know new sides of each other. Dates didn't involve the boy who had once been their only bond to each other.

Somehow Dick had gotten the idea that third dates were important. A deal breaker, when you either forged ahead to an actual relationship or decided to bail out. So for their third date Dick went big. And far. Mac was confused when they drove into the airport. Confused when Dick removed two carry-on bags from his truck. Understanding started as they moved through security. When they got to the boarding area, Mac tugged on his arm to stop him.

"Where are we going?" Dick just grinned. "Los Vegas? San Francisco? Napa?" He just grinned and leaned in to kiss her quickly. Mac kissed him back, intending to break the kiss and get an answer, but she forgot as the kiss deepened, forgetting the question and that there were lots of people around them.

When the airport intercom announced that flight 815 for Australia was now boarding, Mac felt the shock settle in.

Fifteen hours later Mac was stumbling off the plane in Australia. Dick was ready to go the next day, but Mac was sluggish, disoriented by the long flight and time change. They had taken the day slow, then spent the next three days exploring Sydney, missing just two days of class. And their third date had set the stage for the relationship that followed. So maybe third dates were important.

K

K is for Kiss. Their first kiss was a microcosm of their relationship. There was misunderstanding, confusion, hurt feelings, then something surprising. Something good.

They have just finished eating brunch at Café 21 on the beach. Dick paid, and Mac let him. They were walking down the boardwalk enjoying the warm sun and soothing waves. Mac thought everything was perfect. At least she thought everything was perfect until Dick spoke.

"I don't want to be friends."

Mac is floored. She stops dead in her track causing a bicyclist to veer sharply to avoid hitting her.

"What?" Her voice shows her shock.

"I don't want to be friends anymore."

She feels the hurt and confusion blooming in her chest, and both emotions are clear on her face when she responds. "Fine. Nobody is forcing you to be here. I'll just find my own way home."

She turns to leave, but Dick reaches out to stop her, his frustration clear.

"No. I mean I don't want to be your friend. Anymore"

Pride shores her up and she conceals her hurt behind annoyance. "I heard you."

She tries to step away from him again, but he uses his grip on her arm and his size to maneuver her so her back is to the sea wall with Dick blocking her path forward.

"No, wait, this isn't coming out right." He pauses as he tries to figure out how to say it more clearly. When he speaks again his voice is loud and slow. "I mean I don't want to be your friend." Loud enough to attract the attention of some of the people passing by, drawing curious or sympathetic looks. Slow enough that Mac sees can see the intent in his eyes. And it doesn't look like he means to hurt her. So she lets him talk and she stops trying to get away.

Now she is confused. He's not saying anything new, yet clearly thinks he's said something that she should be responding too. She tries to bank back her hurt and annoyance. "Yeah, I got that. Thanks. " She gestures helplessly. "If you don't want to be my friend, then what has the last three months been about? The last year?"

Dick realizes he's fucking this up and looks frustrated. "Fuck. OK, how about this?"

His hands close around her upper arms and he kisses her on the lips in a move so surprising, given their conversation, that Mac is completely still and lets him hold her and kiss her, her arms hanging limply at her side the whole time.

He sets her back down on her heels and looks down at her, cautious of what her reaction will be. Whenever they had gotten close to this moment before she had withdrawn.

His words are full of barely contained emotion. "I don't want to be your friend."

She looks confused, her eyes pinching, her forehead wrinkled as she stares at him. Then she smiles slowly, biting her lip and shaking her head.

"You are such an idiot."

Dick opens his mouth to protest, but Mac cuts him off with a kiss. When she pulls back he is grinning as large as she has ever seen him grin.

"You don't tell a girl you don't want to be friends. You tell her you want to be more than friends."

Dick shrugs. "That's what I said."

Then he kisses her again. She kisses him back then lets him take her home. School had just let out for the summer and Mac was living with her parents again for the summer.

The drive to her house is uncharacteristically silent. He cuts the engine after he stops in the driveway, but makes no move to get out or follow her inside. He glances at her and sees that her mind is racing.

"Mackie?"

She looks over at him.

"It's OK if you need some time. Just don't run too far or take too long OK?"

She smiles, feeling her heart clench at his open emotional expression. She unlatches her seatbelt and exits the truck, sliding down to the ground.

She is almost to her front door when she turns around and walks back to the truck. He rolls down the window.

"Are you sure?" She needs to be sure. Of him. Of herself.

His reply leaves no doubt. "Yeah."

"Then I don't need time to think. And I won't run."

(Some of this section was written for another story, but has not been posted yet elsewhere... I just altered it to make it work in canon.)

L

L is for Luddite. Dick was a modern guy. He had modern sensibilities, modern morals, modern technology. But for all his electronic toys, his abilities did not surpass the common person's functionality. Sure, he could find the way to beat the hardest levels in any violent video game, and he knew how to use the Easter Eggs to get his avatar to play naked in a few games, but when it came to computers or the internet, beyond google and click or email, he had no clue.

Mac called him a Luddite. But she laughed when she said it, so while he didn't know what it meant, he was sure it wasn't that bad of a thing. Mac thought he was a Luddite, but she still liked him and she had forgiven him for a lot worse offenses than that.

L is for Laugh. Like. Lust. Love.

Dick made Mac laugh long before she would admit to liking him in any capacity. He went out of his way to make her laugh, make her days a bit better, a bit brighter, and eventually she realized that he really did like her. She was cautious at first. Their history was complicated at best. Then once they had started to become friends, she admitted she liked him. Never thought that 'like" would become "Like!" or as Veronica put it "Like-Like". But somehow the like she felt for her friend changed into a different kind of like, but just as she was realizing it, just as he let her know that he felt the same, he had gone off the rails.

Mac didn't want to think it was her avoidance that had sent Dick spiraling out of control. She thought maybe it was a coincidence. At worst a contributing factor. But regardless, she freaked out and had been in full avoidance mode when Dick had gone on a two week bender that resulted in an intervention and Dick withdrawing from Hearst to complete 60 days of rehab.

When he returned, Mac was unsure how things would be. She had just started to be comfortable with their friendship when Dick had stared at her and let her know, without saying it directly, that he liked her as more than a friend.

Now he was back and they were all working double time to make sure he established good routines. Surf, therapy, school (some internet courses he could complete quickly to accrue credits so he wouldn't be a third year froshmore). He still made her laugh, but it was pointless to deny that the simple like she had felt had changed and was now colored with more than a little lust.

Mac was more than a little scared of where her feelings could lead, especially since Dick hadn't made any attempt to take their friendship farther than friends since his return from rehab.

Then he kissed her. And after that it was a slippery slope to love.

M

M is for Memory. Every relationship is a collection of memories. Some of them good. First meeting, first date, first kiss. But every relationship also has its share of bad memories. First fight, worst fight, maybe a breakup. Jealousy. Anger. Disappointment.

Mac and Dick's memories stretched back to second grade when they had met officially. Dick sat in front of Mac in class. It was not an auspicious beginning. He was mean. She was shy. She had suffered through his presence in the periphery of her life until college. He was still around, but she wouldn't call it suffering. At least not on most days. They shared painful memories, but good ones too, and as their years friendship stretched ahead, the good outnumbered the bad.

M is for Marriage. Mac had never really imagined herself married. Husband, house, white picket fence, 2.1 kids. She didn't have another image in mind, but she just never thought that that one, the typical American dream, would be her life.

Dick had thought he'd get married. He was pretty sure it would end in divorce and he'd marry again. A few times. His dad always seemed pretty happy. But his dad had been a liar. His wives had hated him in the end. He cheated people out of millions of dollars. Ruined thousands of people financially. He had been a horrible father. A horrible husband. A horrible investment.

Dick was very careful about his relationship with Mac. Logan had cautioned him that he had to be. And Dick could see that he was right. Mac wasn't just another girl. If they broke up, he could lose her friendship as well as their relationship. She was more than someone to entertain himself with, more than someone to keep his bed occupied at night. Dick couldn't imagine losing her, so he was very careful with each step of their relationship. But he always kept them stepping forward. He was the one to seek her out. He asked for her friendship. He kissed her. He asked for their first date. And the next seven. He was the one who first mentioned vacationing together. Moving in together. Making a life. Together.

Logan had warned him to be careful, that one dumb mistake could cost him more than he realized. And Dick knew Logan knew what he was talking about. Logan and Veronica had broken up and gotten back together more times than anyone cared to remember in the first few years of their relationship, but each time it was like the world had ended. Each time it was up in the air if they would get back together.

Besides if Dick hurt Mac he knew Veronica would electrocute his nuts. Again.

But Mac was the one who suggested getting married. Sure she was more than little tipsy from alcohol and winning at roulette. But as they wandered towards their hotel room at 3:45 in the morning, it was Mac who saw the wedding chapel and suggested it.

They were in Vegas for Logan's 25th birthday. They'd been dating for a several years, living together in a small apartment on the beach for the last five months. Dick had thought he would wait until Christmas or New Years to propose. He didn't have a plan on how to ask her yet, but he was confident he would think of something that Mac would appreciate.

But instead it was hours past a normal bedtime. They were in Vegas, one of the most artificial places in the world. But they were together. Having fun. And in love. Dick though he'd had to wait. Girls had some weird six month rule about dating and living together, and since he was not going to take any chances with rushing Mac and freaking her out he doubled that six months to a year. There was no rush. They had time.

Dick was onboard right away. No wedding planning? No drama? Just Mac as his wife? What could be better? But then he cautioned himself.

She was still smiling up at him, happy and apparently without doubts. He smiled back and wrapped his arm around her more closely, resuming their slow canter towards the elevator. "Yeah. Absolutely. But let's wait until tomorrow."

"Don't you mean today?"

"Today, tomorrow, later today. Time is relative in Vegas."

She snarked back at him. "Time is relative everywhere."

"Sure, but Vegas never sleeps," he counters.

"I think that's New York."

He kisses her lightly as the elevator doors close.

"We'll get some sleep, hit a buffet, then we can get hitched." His tone is light, his arm around her relaxed.

"So you're OK with getting married, you just want a good meal before you do? Like a condemned man?"

He punches the emergency stop button on the elevator. "You want to get married now? Let's go."

She looks up at him, still smiling, but serious now.

They did get married in Vegas. But not until the next evening after they had both slept, ate, and talked.

N

N is for Neptune. The town they had grown up in. Mac liked to refer to it as the hell-mouth. Dick thought she watched Buffy reruns too often. Neptune was just a town. No more or less evil than any other town. At least that was Dick's contention. Mac didn't agree.

After Mac graduated she had gotten a job in Neptune working at a start up programming firm that was supplying Kane Industries with its best software in a decade. Mac got a job in Neptune to let Dick finish his degree. She wasn't sure long distance could work for anyone, and didn't want to try. She liked how things were, and if that meant spending another year in Neptune, then so be it.

N is for Narnia. As in the The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.

Coming home late from work, Mac found Dick reading the first of C.S. Lewis' books to their five year old daughter. She stood in the doorway listening as Dick's voice grew softer and softer trying not to wake up their sleeping daughter. Dick looked down at the toe headed girl cuddled into his chest and slowly closed the book, looking up to see Mac.

"Don't you think she's a bit young for that one?" Mac questioned.

"Why?" He asked puzzled. "It's a kids book."

Mac smiled and shook her head. "If she has nightmares, you're the one who'll be getting up with her."

"Is there scary stuff in here? We're just in chapter three."

"It might not be scary to you, but she's five."

Dick shrugs. "I've never read it."

Mac is shocked. "You've never read The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe?"

Dick extricates himself slowly from the small twin bed, careful not to jar the sleeping child. He turns off the light, leaving the room illuminated by the soft glow of a night light and pulls the door closed, leaving a two inch gap.

In the living room he plops down on the couch and Mac sits next to him, automatically curling her legs up under her and leaning against his side. "How have you never read that book?"

Dick shrugs. "I dunno."

She stares at him still puzzled. He grimaces, still sensitive about some of his past. "I didn't really like to read. And my parents sure as hell never read to me."

"But you must have read it in school."

He shakes his head. "Crib notes. Or I paid someone to do the book report for me."

"We read it in grade school!" Her response is indignant.

"So?"

"So you were already paying people to do your homework in grade school?"

Dick's reply is meant to appease her. "I'm reading it now."