MOODY BLUE PIXIE 2
AN: I will be splitting the point of views in this chapter. I felt the need to give Bella a little air time. Remember Jasper and Alice have changed powers with Edward and Bella. Also OOC, Bella is the shopaholic in this story LOL.
If I Die Young - The Band PerryIf I Die Young Bury Me In Satin
Lay Me Down On A Bed Of Roses
Sink Me In The River At Dawn
Send Me Away With The Words Of A Love Song
Oh Oh
The Ballad Of A Dove
Go With Peace And Love
Gather Up Your Tears, Keep 'em In Your Pocket
Save Them For A Time When Your Really Gonna Need Them Oh
The Sharp Knife Of A Short Life, Well
I've Had Just Enough Time
So Put On Your Best Boys And I'll Wear My Pearls
It's just that in the Deep South, women learn at a young age that when the world is falling apart around you, it's time to take down the drapes and make a new dress."
— Karen Marie Moning (Faefever)
EPOV
"Edward, this is the best birthday ever!" Pixie squealed from her perch on top of our dining room table. She is into 80's movies now and her favorite is Sixteen Candles. So for her sixteenth birthday I recreated the scene from the movie. I had help from the girls in our family and mom. Since the Denali incident a year ago the family has come to treat her like one of our own. It's funny sometimes but after dark as I walk into a room we are both greeted by the family like she is standing here with me. She loves this and loves the family. Lately she calls the others her sisters and brothers and Esme and Carlisle are mom and dad to her.
Neither of us can eat the cake sitting between us but it's the gesture she appreciates. "Watch this, I've learned something new," she grinned impishly at me. Then still looking into my eyes she leans over and blows on the candles. They flicker and are snuffed out just like she blew them out from her breath! Pixie is improving her skills and getting flirtatious.
"Tell me where to send your gift?" I ask. This is another one of my ploys to find her.
She doesn't like to talk about her real self. I know she is southern; her voice has that distinctive southern drawl. I think it's a coastal south dialect by some of the colloquialisms she uses at times. For example the word bayou, once I was reading a book and the location in the book was Bayou Casotte, in Jackson County Mississippi. I had said something about the name of the bayou, pronouncing it the way I saw it in the book and she said, "Yankees, it's pronounced as Baaa Ca-saaat" and another time I had talked to her about the airport in New Orleans because of my lawyer Jinks is located in that area. I had said something about going on my annual trip to New Orleans and was quickly corrected "no, you say it this way, Naaa, Naaa," she said stressing the NA sound, exasperated at my pronunciation. "Not the whole word new. It's Na'Orlens. You don't stress the A in last word either. It's more like Na Or-Lens."
By the time she had finished the rant her hands were on her hips and she looked at me like she was lecturing a small child. It was adorable. My pixie…. I'm going to find her one day. She is beautiful. Her hair is long and dark along with her eyes. She is pale icy blue so I think her skin is alabaster in real life.
She was more forthcoming as a child but she is tight lipped now. I don't know why, when I ask all she will tell me is that me knowing the details of her life will change outcomes. She is a master with her visions now, and includes the whole family in her guardian duties. Even going as far as increasing our coffers, not that we needed much help there, we have had quite a long time to accumulate our wealth.
The ladies of the house love her fashion tips. She will tell them through me of course, the latest fashion to hit the runways and the styles and colors that will work best on them. She also goes as far as where they can find it. Alice loves this because she hates to shop and when Pix tells her where to go to or call and order from such and such boutique a certain dress that would be perfect for her she will do so immediately. She will do anything to not go shopping. I think Alice would let her do all the shopping for her if she was here.
Pix has been helping Rose locate parts for a vintage '55 Victress. Rose is in love with the body on this car and tinkers with her obsession constantly. I think personally Rosalie just likes to hunt for stuff that is difficult to find. Hey she has unlimited time so this is her method of filling the long hours.
With Esme it is different. Pix just follows her around the house with a smile on her face. She will watch her fluff pillows and do little things for Carlisle with a wistful look in her eye. She thinks they are a cute and romantic couple. Her words, yuck, they are my parents. I hear what these couples do together at night so I don't really want to hear or talk about that romantic stuff.
BPOV
I have learned so much living this dual life. It's stressing at times dealing with two families. In what I like to call the real world I am from the outskirts of Biloxi Mississippi. I am the middle daughter of Charles and Renee Swan. I have every quirk of a middle child at least that is what my shrink tells my parents. If I told them what was happening to me I would be locked up in some mental hospital. It's happened in the past, in fact in my grandmother's time her sister was locked up. The family told everyone she had died from scarlet fever but granny told me the truth.
She says I have a lot more than looks in common with my namesake, Great Aunt Isabella. She was locked up in the 50's and eventually received a prefrontal lobotomy, which was common in that time period. She never left the asylum after my Great Grandfather dropped her off there like garbage to be disposed of. She died sometime in the early sixties, shitting in a diaper and drooling. It makes me hate the ignorance of that time. Hell, I hate the ignorance of this time.
See, she could see the future also. I have known "things" that were going to happen since I was a small child. But I also learned early to keep my mouth shut. One mighty backhand from momma fixed my eagerness to speak out. Now I just tell my granny the important stuff that will happen. She makes some distraction if she can to prevent the future from going that route and all is well in the family and momma is none the wiser. My mother abhors all mention of my visions and it is something that is not discussed ever. She says it is embarrassing to her and the family.
My dad has asked me occasionally about a horse race or a football game. I win it for him every time. We don't do it often, it's our little secret.
My sisters Elizabeth and Caroline know about my visions and are fine with them. We don't speak of it in the house. Momma could hear and all hell would break loose. Their favourite thing to say is "Never bet against Bella", which is a fact. As of now I am ninety per cent correct in my visions. The ten per cent is because of people changing their minds at the last second and crazy spur of the moment decisions. Those can be a problem.
The visions come in handy. I saved my sister from being raped once. I called her on her cell before she took a "ride" from her best friend's brother home after a party. He had no intention of taking her home. Asshole, he later tried the same tactic on a local sheriffs daughter and is now in the Mississippi State Pen. I hope he is making lots of friends and his well-used ass resembles the Bankhead tunnel.
The visions can also break your heart. There have been a few that I could do nothing about. Like little Cecily Crawly, I knew what she had was Leukaemia a month before her diagnosis. I also knew she wouldn't make it to her second round of chemo. I cried every time I saw her and would have to leave the room. I told granny and she told me that life is heart breaking but you can't fix everything. Life goes on, babies will be born, and spring will come. That's just granny, she is springtime to me.
My visions are a bitter sweet blessing. I had a new vision this week and its upset me more than I ever thought one would. You know that little saying "live like you were dying"; it has new meaning for me for I now know I will never make it to twenty one. I die sometime in the year after my twentieth birthday. I don't know why for I can't see the reason I die in any vision I get. But what I did see was my parents at my wake. Let me say it was a horrible wake and my mother should be shot for putting me in a dress like that.
It's quite depressing for me that I will never make it to twenty one. I had the most spectacular party planned with fairy lights in the garden and a multi-tiered cake. I was going to have all my friends and a band. We were going to drink champagne punch until we were lushes. Oh the party dress I envisioned. Well, you can't fight fate. You can't fight her, but I'm going to prank that bitch!
So to my momma's worst fear I have decided to become the wild child of the family. Really, I intend to do it all before I go. I gave myself a gift this year of a fake ID and I am making a list of things to do. In fact this week end I am going to try out the casinos. I plan to make enough to buy me some fun and save for a rainy day, if I am careful. I don't want to lose my ticket to ride.
I am sixteen today and I can't wait till it's time to go to bed. Bed? Yes, bed, see when I sleep I go far away from here. I go to my other life and my other family. Best of all I go to the true love of my life, my Edward. I know it sounds silly but it's not a dream. He's not a dream but he sure is dreamy. Edward Cullen is a walking wet dream, copper penny hair, tall, sexy, eyes of gold and or black, and a vampire. NO I am not crazy. I have been with Edward all my life and he and the family could only hide their nature from me for so long. Visions, duh!
Edward has always been there for me. This power kind of grows with me, at first as a small child I couldn't talk to him. I didn't know how. It was kind of like stretching a muscle in my brain I tried and tried and then one day I could. I think my chatter nearly drove him crazy at times. He was a sport about it. He became my best friend; he paid attention to me, and gave me a great gift, his time. What grown man would do tea parties day after endless day with a small child?
I kept exercising my brain and after some time went by I learned how to move things while I was with him and make him feel me. As I got older he would walk with me and hold my hand. We spent many a night sitting on the rocks watching the river roll or lying in our meadow just talking. I learned more from Edward than any teacher in school. He loves history and shared that with me. What I am trying to do now is make others see me while I am there. I want to hang out with my sisters and other mom and not need an interpreter.
There is a down side though. I pay for all my brain stretching on this end with massive migraines. I have spent many a day shut up in my room with the curtains drawn. Light sears my brain and movement makes me nauseous. Every hour I have to spend in a dark room heaving is worth it to be with Edward.
I have to admit I also want to do some other things with Edward, just us, grown up things. Did I say that I am in love with him, I LOVE EDWARD CULLEN! I would shout it to the world if I could. He knows, I have never told him, but he knows. I think he feels the same for me. Maybe I was given my second life with Edward as a consolation prize since I don't have so long. So I will cherish every moment, live, love, and laugh every second I have left with him.
I don't want to die. I have so much to do. What will Edward do when I don't show up one night? How do I tell him what I have seen? Plans, I need to get to work. Don't bet against me, I am going to find a way around this. Please God, help.
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BPOV
Decisions, decisions, decisions, everything rest on decisions people make. One little snap decision and all my work will go up in smoke so I am learning to keep my lips sealed, especially when it comes to my tricky Edward. He loves me and he wants to be with me. He has told me not in words, well maybe words. He questions me constantly and even went so far as to buy me a car. A zippy little BMW. Only to get said car I have to tell him where I am. That is one cherry car and I would love, love, love to get my hands on it but now is not the time. I have a little longer before that happens.
You see I am going to be like him one day. Well at least my visions tell me so. Like him? A vampire, that I will die is certain, I have foreseen blood and my mother's tears so that is confirmed and unchanging. It won't be something I caused but something of an instant nature that gets me. But I also saw myself running through the Olympic forest chasing a deer, pale as my Edward and I had some bitchin red eyes. I know all about the vamp lifestyle. Edward at first tried to keep it a secret but as I got older he gave up on that. I have always been too nosy for my own good.
Edward has no clue about everything that is happening to me and it is best at the moment he doesn't. I am in New Orleans today on the first step of what is my plan to be one of the vamps. Mom told me I could spend time with granny this weekend so I am covered from the parents finding out what I am up to, now I just need to make sure Edward doesn't catch on.
"Mr. Jenks will see you now." Announces the short blond receptionist as she replaces the phone receiver. Mr. Jason Jenks is Edwards's lawyer. He doesn't know I know that but like I said before I'm nosy. That and I will need a lawyer for my plan to go the way I want. I will need a very good and understanding lawyer; one that is scared shitless of his client will just guarantee that my wishes will be fulfilled in the way I need them to go. It's a plus that he can bend the rules to his advantage, and can be crooked as hell at times. I'm a girl with a plan, and a tight schedule.
"Thanks," I reply as I stand and walk into the spacious office. The man sitting behind the large desk is short, 50ish, balding and has a condescending attitude toward the young. Let's see if we can change that.
He stood to shake my hand. "What can I do for your Miss Swan?" he smiled in a bored way and continued. "You are sort of young to need a lawyer."
"I was directed to you by my good friend Mr. Edward Cullen, Mr. Jenks." When this leaves my mouth you can watch the attitude change. Gone is the pompous look, what takes it place can only be called fear? He blanches white, and sweat begins to bead on his forehead. Oh, I like this, power. Now let's get something going.
"I would rather you not let him know I was here if you don't mind. What we are going to discuss is a rather sensitive issue and I don't want to tell my parents just yet." He nods at this.
"Maybe you could explain what you will need then." He picks up his pen.
"Firstly, I need a Living Will." Now starts my little foray into serious lies. I've done little white lies but these are dark and smelly. But I have no choice; I cue the actress in me and give him a small forlorn smile.
"Oh, my dear, I am so sorry," He almost whispers this. As the song goes "Sharp Knife of a Short Life" I hate to use this ploy but it was the only one that worked when I went over my options and the outcomes of each vision.
"Yes, well. My parents don't know and again if Edward was to hear of it he might let something slip." I'm doing well; the guy is buying every line. "I really am not comfortable talking about it." I start to tear up. "Can we just go over what is needed on both our ends?"
"Honey, maybe your parents should be here with you."
"No, see what I have medicine can't fix and per my doctor, it's going to be a tight schedule. I could blow at any minute," I tap my head as a sort of clue. Hell any dumbass could figure out I am talking about an aneurism. "My mom," cue tears, "Well she would handle things the way she wants, which would be all formal and teary. I don't want that. I'm young, I know I am going to a better place and I want it to be a celebration." I smile all teary eyed at him. Bat some teary eyes at a southern gentleman and you can get anything you want done. This is morbidly fun.
Ok, let's get started." He replied quietly picking up his pen and placing it on the paper.
"First, I want a living will that states when I go into a coma they will give me at least two weeks before they turn off the machines. This will appease mom and give her a little time to come to grips with what is going to happen. Second, my body is to be donated to science. I know my mom will shit, pardon me for saying that, but she will fight you on this. But I am firm on this. I want to help someone else who may have the same problem and I have done my research. There is a doctor, his name is Carlisle Cullen, in fact he is Edward's father," he visibly shivered when I spoke Edward's name. "His is into research on the same problem I have. I trust him and I want to help him with his research. This will be the only possible way I can."
He looks up at my pause, "Doable," he tells me.
"Ok the third and final thing and it will be harder for you that the second request when it comes to my mom. But again, I am firm on this. I don't want anyone there except Dr. Cullen and his associates there when they turn off the machines." I let my voice crack on this one and get out my hanky to dab at my eyes. It really is affecting me you know. I will be leaving everything I have ever known. I will lose my parents, my sisters, and granny. It's not going to be easy. But neither is the other outcome. I can't lose my only chance with Edward. Not going to happen.
"Ok, that is the three things I need concerning the Living Will. Next we need to go over contacting Dr. Cullen when it happens. You will need to do that. Um, I am writing letters to each of my family members for before the memorial service. And of course the memorial service, I almost have it planned."
I think my lawyer is in shock. He is just staring at me now. "How old are you honey," he asked.
"Eighteen sir."
"You are very strong for an eighteen year old girl", he smiles gently at me. I think he will do anything for me now. My first human victim and not even a drop of blood spilled.
I close my eyes and take a quick glimpse into my future. Everything is on schedule; I am still with my Edward in my vision. I smile to myself; it's been a good day. I have a two year window to get it planned out and ready.
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BPOV- two years later
"Granny, some things going to happen soon." I figure Granny is the safest one to start this with. Everyone else is going to freak.
Granny is bent over her largest Dutch oven stirring roux to make gumbo for tonight's dinner. It's a long process for her. She is so precise in that it is made the same way every time. No step is taken before it is called for and there are never any short cuts with Granny's cooking. The roux is the most important step in the process. It has to be a certain color for whatever type of gumbo she is making. Tonight it's black oyster gumbo so it's the darkest of all the roux, one fragile step away from being burnt. "What do you need to tell me Isabella Marie?" She ask never looking up from the pot. She probably is expecting something of our normal problems that I see. Well I have to start setting this up now. I take a deep breath "Granny, can you look at me a second?"
She turned from the pot clutching the spoon. She knows that this is serious from my tone. "It's bad Gran," I say. She immediately turns back to the stove and turns off the heat and removes the Dutch oven from the flame.
"Let's go into the parlor and talk," she puts her arm around my shoulder and leads me to her back parlor. Her crochet sits in its place on her chair. Many a day my sisters and I have played board games and dolls at my Granny's feet while she would sit crocheting. There is no TV in here and she would never allow one here. It's the ladies sanctuary. Granny will always be my example of a Lady. She used to wear gloves to church when I was small and was the last to give up that tradition. Don't ever break a Labor Day rule around Granny.
"Ok, honey, who?" She asked quietly holding her breath till I answer. She knows the drill, fate is cruel and she can see the panic in my eyes so she knows this one will be devastating. I can see the fear in her eyes.
"Me Gran," I whisper. Her eyes go round in horror and she looks shocked. The tears are starting to gather in her eyes. She grabs me in one of her hugs that enfold you and make you know you are safe and all is ok in the world. Nothing ever happens to little girls when they are in their Granny's arms. Granny can fix all the booboo's and bad things of the world. At least that is correct when you're six but now I know the truth.
"Oh, my baby, my baby," she croons and cries holding me tight to her chest. "What can we do, what can I do?" she pulls back from me with desperation in her voice asking questions that we know will change nothing.
"Gran, I can't change this one," I smile a watery smile and continue. "But, it will be ok, and I know what's going to happen after." She looks down at me questioningly. "Granny I saw some things that can't be explained. I will still be here just not me anymore. I will be something different." I know I can't tell her, she will think I have gone off the deep end in shock and denial over my future demise.
"What was your vision, baby. How do you know it's you? She asks.
"I saw a flash of my wake Gran. It was horrible."
"When?"
"This year, I couldn't tell around what time of the year though. I don't think I really want to know. It would seem like I had an expiration date and I want to enjoy what time I have left." I smile up and her and lean into her for another hug. I take a deep breath of her. Granny is all the smells of happiness. Good food, laughter, sugar cookies, and warm summer air.
We ate Campbell's soup that night because Granny went to bed early.
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"Mom and Dad, I have something to say," I interrupt the Sunday dinner conversation. Granny stayed home today so I could tell the family. "I'm not going back to school in the fall and I'm moving out?"
Here comes the fun. Mom's loud "What?"
Dad's "Now young Lady."
My youngest sister Caroline screeches at me, "You are such a Drama Queen!" What the hell is her problem; she will have our room to herself now.
Elizabeth my oldest sister, "Oh hell," is mumbled under her breath. My brother in law Kevin just sits back and watches the show. I think he is scared to talk around us most of the time. The women in this family do that to you.
"I'm not going back Momma! No arguments are going to work on me." I yell over the noise.
"But why honey," Dad the voice of reason? If my mother can't get her way with sheer volume Dad will get it done with his quiet and calm voice that covers the steel he can spring out when needed.
"I don't need a Mrs.'s Degree from Ole Miss, y'all! I have other means of taking care of myself."
Caroline snorts, "Hooker…" I give her a dirty look and she laughs and leans back to join my brother in law for the show.
An hour goes by and it doesn't stop. They hit me from all sides and even Kevin puts in his two cents. I have finally had enough. "Ok, you want a reason, here it is then, God Damn It I Won't Be Here Next Year," I yell.
It's like a record just screeched to a halt. Dead silence. My sisters and Dad gets it. My mom does to except she refuses to face up to my gift.
I get up and walk out. I'm doing a Scarlet O'Hara and I will worry about them tomorrow. Screw it, I'm calling my best friend Foster and we are going to go get drunk.
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Two weeks later.
"I'm not getting on that thing!" I am pointing to my best friends new Ducati. It is the new love of his life and he refuses to get in my Volvo. Since I won the car last month I have listened him make fun of my baby countless times. I won a XC90, silver, with all the bells and whistles. Now that I am out of the closet and out of the house I don't hide my little gambling job I pretty much flaunt it. Jinks is flawless on his false documents and I have never had trouble collecting on any of my winnings. Hell, I even pay taxes on them.
I'm embracing the time I have left, its three months to my birthday. I try not to watch the clock or calendars any more. I refuse to watch any news show. My mom is ignoring the warning I gave them at dinner. Let her, I did my part. They have all been warned and my preparations are complete. That gives me comfort that it is going to be done the way I want. I have checked every vision; I am still with my Edward in them so everything is holding.
"Come on Darlin, I'm not pulling up at the Hard Rock in the Vulva," that's what he calls my Volvo. The Vulva! It's testosterone poisoning, men! Foster is in a closet of his own, he promises me when he finds his other half he will come out and shout it to the world. But until then we both use each other to get our moms off our backs. He's a tall lanky blond with the sweetest disposition and I think he is a little nuts most of the time, but he is my best friend.
Tonight we are going dancing at the Hard Rock Casino with a few of our friends. I have on the cutest white flirty mini dress and I cannot get on that bike. I'm not worried about my hair, it's easily fixed. But if someone calls my mother and tells her I was driving down Beach Boulevard on a bike with my ass shining for all to see I will never hear the end of it! I want peace and once she starts a rant it will go on for months.
I can hear her now, "I can't believe a daughter I raised would flaunt herself"…. And that is just the beginning of the lectures I would have to endure.
"Foster, no! Look how I am dressed." He sniggers at me.
"I will drive slowly and you can tie my jacket around your waist, please, please, please," he asks while batting his eyes at me.
"Ok, but if I get a call from mom I'm officially outing you to the world to get her off my back," I don't know why I bother to argue with the ass, he wins every time.
He passes me a helmet and then his jacket which I tie around my waist. He mounts the bike and looks at me with that tempting grin. He draws men and women like flies with that grin. He is such a trouble maker but I love him.
We cruise down Beach Boulevard in the dark the street lights catching us in their glare only to send us shortly back into the dimness. My head is on Fosters shoulder looking to the right out at the ocean in the dark. The only thing you can see at this moment is the oil rigs in the distance and the lights from some night fishermen. I love this beach town. To my left are the new homes that are taking the place of the old beach front mansions that Katrina wiped from the earth. They are just as large and grand but I miss the old world Biloxi. A little wind caused us so much change.
A red car with a group of frat boys passes us and one hangs out the window hooting and waving at us. Which one of us he was flirting with is unclear, but he was handsome. Foster speeds up to follow and they increase their speed to. Oh crap, here we go, racing down the Boulevard, typical Biloxi Saturday night.
"Foster, slow down damn it!" I lean closer to him and yell at him. He doesn't hear or pay any attention. He is in the frat boy zone and the speed increases even more. The world flashes out as a vision hits me, a black Ford truck runs the light, hitting a red car and rite behind it a motor bike crashes into the fray. Lots of red blood, it pools on the ground below a body hanging from a car window. Pieces of a bike, pieces of people, pieces of black truck, pieces of red car, carnage, pieces, pieces, pieces, all flashing around in my head. I scream and pound Foster's back. "Stop, please, stop!" I scream at him uselessly. He turns back towards me and for a moment our eyes meet. He is smiling, so young, so full of life. He curiously looks at me and turns back but he doesn't slow down. The intersection of Porter Avenue is coming up ahead of us. I can see the glow of the spotlights on the lighthouse that sits there. I never felt the hit.
I'm in the sand lying on my back. It hurts and I drift in and out. There are people looking down on me. Shining a light into my eyes. A medic is cutting my top off. Don't touch me…
The Cullen's are there in their living room. Their shocked eyes are on me. They all see me now. I reach for Edward…
I am looking up at the glowing light house; men are working on my body. 'Don't touch me' I think to myself. I can't talk. I'm busted up pretty bad. Everything hurts so much…. To my right I see a sheet covered body a few feet away from me. One foot is bare, the other is wearing Foster's shoe.
Edward holds me and I look up into his eyes. They are full of horror. I am wearing my white dress but now it is red with Foster's and my blood. I don't feel anything.
"Edward, it's time to come get me."
Choose your last words
This is the last time
Cause you and I,
We were born to die…
Lana Del Ray
AN: ….I loved Beach Blvd on a Saturday night. My only problem with it is that I'm not a college kid any longer. The ocean is to one side and the old mansions on the other (now rebuilt). The pic from the fic is the actual Biloxi lighthouse. Google it and you will see it stands in between a four lane road. I love driving it late at night.
That bitch Katrina, she put a hurting on people down here we will never forget. I have some stories that I may make into a story at a later date. I have a friend that spent the night floating on a pool float in her house with two small children. Some of the things that went down that night will make your hair stand on end and give you bad dreams for years to come.