Chapter Eight - Joey's P.O.V.

"Pacey, I don't know I need some time. I need you to understand what you did to me, how much pain I was in."

"Jo, you know somehow, I always thought that I'd be to one hurting, not the one that was responsible."

"Ha! Hurting doesn't even begin to explain it Pacey; there were days I couldn't get out of bed, days where breathing was nearly impossible. I cried until I had no more tears. Bessie wanted me to go to grief counseling because I wouldn't talk about it, to anyone. If it hadn't been for Jen and Jack, I don't know. I think I might have died of broken heart." My voice is shaking, and I want so badly to cry, but I can't not in front of him, not if I want to stay in control.

"Jo," he says softly, searching my eyes for any sign that I might still care. "I talked to you all summer, you know that, everyday, every night on the boat. Doug once told me that if I left on True Love without dealing with us that all I would see would be you, all I'd hear would be your voice. He was right. I'd dream of you at night; waking up in a sweat because of how you'd look at me in those dreams. Everyone on the yacht thought I was crazy." He sees me losing the battle with my emotions as he speaks, and he reaches out to comfort me, instinctively. I brush past him and sit down on the sofa. I sit there for a few minutes trying to get back my control. I've been an emotional wreck ever since this afternoon at the coffee shop, and I only got worse when Jen and Jack told me what they had done. They said it was because they love me, and couldn't stand to see me so unhappy.

I can feel his eyes on me, he hasn't moved any closer and is still stood in the doorway. "Did you really mean what you said Pace? Do you still love me? Do you still want me?" I ask meakly, staring at the wall opposite the sofa.

He comes and sits next to me on the sofa, looking into my eyes and he says "You are the most important person in my life Jo, you always have been, without you I'm nothing. I don't think I'd be where I am without you. I know I wouldn't be nearly half the man I am without you. Even before we got together, when all we used to do was fight, and annoy each other. No matter what you said, no matter how much it hurt at the time I knew you didn't really mean it, because I knew we meant something to each other."

"Pacey, Stop." I say turning to him, tears in my eyes.

"Stop what?" he asks surprised by the sound of my voice. He moves closer and grabs my hand, looking deep into my eyes. "Josephine Lillian Potter, I love you with every fiber of my being, and I'm willing to do everything in my power to prove it to you; to win you back. I was a fool to let you go." A single tear escapes before I can stop it, I try to speak but all that comes out is a sob.

"Shh, Jo, it's going to be alright." he says moving even closer and wrapping me in his arms "I promise." He finishes and lightly kisses the top of my head. That's the final straw, I can't hold on any longer. I was finally able to do what I had wanted to do since realizing he was gone, I break down in his arms and cry while he holds me, rocking me back and forth. Whispering softly to me.

He just holds me, letting me get it all out. Slowly I begin to calm down; I look up into his blue eyes. "Thank You" I tell him laughing softly as I catch sight of his wet shirt.

"For what?" he asks smiling at me.

"For letting me cry, and for letting me soak your shirt."

"Well you're welcome, besides I think I deserved it. Are we okay?"

"I don't know, but I think were closer."

"Closer, huh? Potter I can live with closer, and I can live with a wet shirt, it's better that the beating I was expecting, because I know you happen to have a mean right hook." He says, his eyes dancing mischievously.

I laugh at his attempt at humor, smile and say "I love you too much to mess up your pretty face."

He just looks at me and stares, finally he says "Really, you still love me?"

"Yes, Pace I still love you."

"But?"

"But, I don't think I'm ready to jump back into things, too much has happened. I need, we need time to get to know each other again, without all of our past baggage."

"What do you want Jo?"

"I want to start over, a fresh start. I want to go dates; I want to spend hours talking; I want to spend time really getting to know each other again, without Capeside and all of the bullshit associated with it."

"I understand, and if you want to start over, then that exactly what we'll do. But before we start over theres something I want to give you. Something I should have given you before I left."

"What?" I ask, curious.

"Close your eyes." I do as he tells me to, and instinctively feel him move closer, his hands come up to my face. I feel his warm breath on my face, and relaxe into his touch. After all this time, and everything that has happened he still makes me feel alive with only the lightest touch.

"I love you." He says barely above a whisper as he closes the distance and softly covers my lips with his own. Immediately I am lost, I respond without thinking. I moan as I open my mouth under his, licking his lower lip seeking entrance to his mouth. He pulls me closer; his tongue meets mine as he deepens the kiss. I feel his hands move from my face into my hair, I am kissing him with everything I have kept locked up inside for so long.

"Hey Jo, where did you put... umm, Oops, sorry guys I didn't know." A very embarrassed Jen says backing out of the room as we pull apart.

I slowly open my eyes and stare into his passion filled ones. We are both breathing hard. I slowly lick my bottom lip, still tasting him there. "What was that?" I ask huskily.

"That was the good bye you never got, the one you deserved before I left." He explains.

"Oh well, then in that case, I think you should probably go before I forget that we are starting over."

He groans, giving me his best puppy dog stare. He realizes that I'm serious and sighs getting up.

He pulls me up and asks "Walk me to the door?"

"Okay, call me, you owe me a date."

"You're on." He says and leans in to kiss me on the cheek before slipping out the door. I watch him walk down the path, once he is out of sight I collapse against the door, weak kneed and smiling.