"Pain hurts, but it makes you stronger," a deep voice rumbled softly.

Hoshi could only glance up at her silver-haired companion across from her for a brief moment before lowering her head once again so he wouldn't see her swollen teary eyes. He was only saying that to comfort her but he wouldn't understand her at all. He was aware of her past, yes, but he wouldn't experience it for himself so he would never know what it was like. He'd been accepted by his own kind all his life, he was a pure full blood! But her? No, she was a hybrid, only a mixing of two unworthy blood. But what bothered her the most was, how did he know she was upset? Oh ruddy gods. He could smell her tears in the air. Oh, how stupid she was, especially after knowing he was a demon! He was silent for a long moment.

"Hoshi."

She heard the slight shuffles of movement before the padding of feet reached her ears but before she could run away so he couldn't see his feet entered her field of vision. Oh dear. He knelt in front of her and gently tilted her face up so she would meet his smothering golden gaze. He had a look of.. concern on his face? She bit her lip in response.

"What's wrong?"

"I-I.."

He waited patiently for her to gather herself up enough to answer. Hoshi swallowed hard several times, wondering if she should tell him, but something held her back. Was it the pain? Or was it just the memory of bad things happening to her? He seemed to sense that, her inner fight with herself.

"You don't need to hide anything from me," he murmured. "You can tell me anything."

"I-I know, but.."

"Hm?"

"It's hard to talk about," she whispered softly.

"Some of the hardest things are not easy to talk about but it helps to let someone in to help you sooth your pain and aid in any way possible."

Her eyes closed, knowing he was right. What was the point hiding from him? For the past two years spent in his presence she had made sure very carefully to ensure she was gone for some herb gathering or something else that would take this whole day up but she had forgotten this year, ironically. Well, she actually hadn't, but the activity hadn't taken as long as she had hoped but still called it a failure. She didn't want him to see or know her inner pain, but she couldn't hide forever. Besides, he should know. He told her so much of himself, though sometimes not purposely, but in response she seemed only to tell him some things. It was time to open up.

"Today is the day that marks the day I was officially alone…," she finally murmured to him.

"As in the day your parents passed on?"

She flinched lightly in response.

"Your mother and father died separately though," he questioned, confused lightly.

"I don't know when my mother died," she whispered. "But today is the day my father died, so it is the day that marks the time I was officially alone."

Understanding filled his eyes as he watched her carefully. Now it made sense, why she snuck away from him on this day, for the past little while. She didn't want him to see her hurting. Foolish girl. Didn't she understand he cared for her and wished to protect her from any harm, even things from her past? They may have not been companions long in demon standards but yet, they had grown very close. Every second spent together, all the talks and laughs, and the understanding of each other had been treasured and honestly, she had been his longest companion. He usually didn't even have one truth to be told.

"I apologize for causing you any unnecessary trouble," Hoshi said.

Instead of answering, he wordlessly held out his hand to her and waited for her reaction. Hoshi stared at him for a moment almost in surprise. What was he requesting or wanting to do? But without a single hint of hesitation she took his hand and allowed him to both them pull to their feet before he was taking her out of the circle of the fire's warmth into the chilly night. Where was he taking her? Despite her questioning looks, he ignored it.

'What are you trying to do,' she wondered.

But to her surprise, he suddenly turned around to pull her in front of him to cover her eyes. Hoshi panicked for a second. What on earth was he doing!

"Do you trust me," he breathed into her ear.

"Of course," she answered without hesitation. "But wh-"

"Let me guide you."

"B-B-But I-"

"Let me be your eyes, Hoshi. Trust me on this. I won't let you fall."

She hesitated this time, however. He had never asked her to do this for him, to trust him like this. If there was anything she hated most, was not being able to see her surroundings. The thing was however she did trust him. With her life. She never wanted to disobey or disappoint him, but especially since he was her companion, friend, ally, and master. She wouldn't fail him. Hoshi would have to be brave and trust.

"I trust you," she answered softly.

He began to lead her gently up a path but kept covering her eyes ensuring she couldn't see. Her hearing senses were even more on alert than usual but it probably was unnecessary. Hoshi felt her panic fade. It was okay, she was in his protection and care. Just like she once had been in her fathers and mothers. A horrible pang of pain rippled through her heart but she flinched anyway, alerting her companion to her deep sadness and grief. She was thinking of her parents. But he would try to heal the wounds the best he could, but little did he know he would damage what he healed later on when he passed as well. He realized they were at his destination.

"We're here."

Hoshi remained silent, but he could feel her eagerness to see again through her body language. He smiled gently.

"Ready?"

"Hai."

He removed his hands. Hoshi opened her eyes and gazed about her in wonder, gasping in awe. They were at the top of a series of high cliffs on a mountains side giving them a very clear view of the night sky twinkling with countless stars, big and small, in the dark velvet of the sky. She had never seen such a beautiful sight! So many stars in the sky! She turned to look at him, who was watching her with a gentle smile on his lips.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"Hoshi, I understand you are in pain because of the loss."

She flinched lightly again but looked back at the sky, and he was aware she was still listening to him. She understood what he meant. Why did he bring it up again when she had began to heal?

"I know I'm doing this at the wrong time," he soothed, immediately knowing her thoughts. "But Hoshi, you don't have to suffer alone anymore. You aren't alone in the world."

"Why do you wish to bear the pain with me," she sighed.

"Because I know what it is like. My mother died when I was a young pup and my father was gone frequently so I never saw him. I am also an only child. In a way, I'm just like you."

She turned to stare. He understood? By the look in his eyes, she could tell he wasn't lying to her. Who would have known? Not her, at least. She looked back at the stars, captivated by their beauty despite her pain.

"Your parents are gone from this world, but they are always with you, in here."

His hand snaked around to gently place itself over her left breast making her flush lightly but she understood. They were in her heart, her blood. He was right. Despite the pain, she should let him aid her in what tortured her. She looked behind her to gaze at him. His silver hair whipped around his face in the light breeze despite it being in a ponytail and his golden eyes watched her carefully. She smiled at him. He wrapped his arms around her waist to draw her to his chest before his chin rested on her shoulder lightly to offer a gently comfort. She shuddered lightly at the contact. She still wasn't used to being touched, though she'd been with him for two years or more. It took some getting used to. He usually didn't touch her anyways. But something compelled him to do this tonight and he was showing a more gentle side to him she really hadn't seen. It was nice.

"Hoshi," he questioned lightly.

"Hai?"

His lips pressed to her cheek lightly making her blush but his next words stunned her. How did he know her need for a companion and love?

"I will never leave you."

Hoshi shuddered violently as the memory rushed through her head forcing her to lay her arms on the table before resting her forehead on them. She hated remembering so much! But his last words to her that day had been a lie. He'd never leave? Oh how wrong he had been that day. She forced herself to concentrate on her breathing to ensure she wouldn't start sobbing like some heartbroken girl, but deep down she truly was that. Heartbroken still from the loss. He'd healed her.. only to break her twice as worse than her parents ever had done. He hadn't meant to, she knew that. But the memory made her realize something too; he was right. Pain did make you stronger and if you did let someone in, the pain healed quicker than trying to heal yourself. He'd taught her so much.

'But why did you leave me,' she thought sadly.

Why had he gone despite his wounds? She knew he loved his human mate beyond anything except her and his sons, but why hadn't he allowed her to attend to him before he ran off? She had meant to go with him, but she'd hesitated for a few long minutes. That stupid decision had cost him his life. If she had gone.. she began to cry despite her efforts. She'd failed him. He was gone. But now.. he was back in the most unlikely way possible that even she hadn't thought of. His sons. She hadn't even known until earlier today.

How had she not known his sons upon sight? She had been with him for so long how could she not have seen it in their faces or scent? The beautiful golden eyes and silky white-silver hair he'd passed on to his sons should have been the first clue but no she hadn't seen it! Not even the swords he'd forged from his own fang had been a clue even when she had seen them so often after their creation! He'd given one to each of his sons but.. she hadn't realized it. But the biggest clue of all was their scent. They bared the scent of him in their blood. She should have recognized it the second she got a whiff of their scent but she hadn't! She had spent so long in his presence his scent had become memory. His sons.. another tear dropped from her cheek.

For many years she had followed him. He had allowed her, a hybrid with unworthy blood, to follow him in his footsteps. But she had learned he didn't care for her bloodline, but who she was. He hadn't cared or judged her on what others thought. He had gained his own opinion of her once he got to know her and understood her more than anyone in the world. He knew her worries, her fears, and her sadness which he responded with his own. He'd done everything he could to heal the damage already done to her heart. He'd protected her from their enemies whenever she slipped up. He'd ensured all her needs were satisfied and she was happy. He'd been compassionate and kind to her though to others he appeared powerful and serious, which she found amusing. Who wouldn't truly know him like she did? They'd confided so much in each other. It had been her and him. No one could break the bond they had forged together, not even death or time. Even now, the bond between them lingered but sometimes she wished it wasn't there.

But then she, his human mate, had interfered. At first she would admit she hadn't like the mortal woman when she and her father had began to see each other but she hadn't protested. What could she have done anyway? She hated the fact he began to disappear for long spaces of time leaving her to aimlessly wander the woods alone or find ways to entertain herself. Until one day he forced her to meet the human woman. At first, she hated her. She didn't like the fact another was getting his attention, she wanted him to herself. She would admit it, she had been selfish, but she hadn't ever had to fight for his attention before with another.

'Oh how I wished you gone,' Hoshi groaned to herself.

But one day the human woman had been attacked while he had been gone to attend to a quick matter and Hoshi had been forced to protect her being nearby luckily. How lucky that woman had been.. But she hadn't done it for her. She'd done it for him, originally. Hoshi had taken the woman to their camp and attended to the claw wounds on the woman's arm only for the woman to speak to her almost as if he would have. After that day, Hoshi was a bit more.. kind to the woman. But she didn't really like her still. It took time, but his future mate at the time had slowly grown on her too. After all, she was around almost all the time! On the bonus side she and the woman hadn't tried to fight over his attention but shared it. Thus, it began a relationship of friendship that Hoshi later hadn't regretted. Not only did she have her demon father but his human mate as close companions and friends that forged their bond to grow even more powerful than ever.

'The three of us.. together..'

They had been just like a family, but quite an odd one. A dog demon, a hybrid demoness, and a young human woman and it probably couldn't get odder, honestly. But then she had gotten pregnant with his child. Everything had changed. He had become more protective of his human mate more than ever and it was even a bit scary to be in her presence for even Hoshi! She knew she wouldn't be harmed but it still didn't mean she wouldn't back off a soft warning growl slid past his teeth when she got too close or something else odd. That was when she began to question whether he trusted her anymore.

'Then you.. I know you didn't mean to.. but why did you.. I thought you trusted me.. then..'

Hoshi had gotten to close for his liking. She had finally pushed the limits by accident by just helping the woman to her feet and a simple hug. An accident. Hoshi cringed lightly at the memory before running her hand over the right side of her face where his claws had torn into her face that night. It hadn't been his fault. His inner demon had considered her a threat and taken over before he could restrain it. Despite his age, he couldn't always control it. She was completely aware of that. She had learned that her talons had been too close to the swollen belly and she had appeared threatening to his inner demon later on. But it had frightened her so and pained her to an extent no one could understand. He was pained and upset about the whole ordeal himself because he had to see the damage he had done to her every day. It had been the beginning of what tore them apart.

'I'm so sorry.. my fault.'

After the incident, Hoshi couldn't bear for him to be too close or even touch her flesh for several weeks. Every time he managed to touch her however as if trying to grab her hand or give her a simple hug, she would cringe away in fear or even run for it. She had become afraid of the one demon she had trusted for so long. His human mate had been frightened too at first, but after learning the reason she no longer feared him but trusted him farther to protect her. But Hoshi had the exact opposite reaction.. fear.. distrust.. and pain. She saw the damage had been done physically and mentally, on her face and on her heart too. He'd never harmed her before.. not once. Never made her bleed, but he had after many years. To protect his human mate from her, his most trusted companion, friend, and adopted daughter. How that had pained her..

She couldn't smile after what had happened. Never did her laughter ring in his ears. Slowly it had been like she had been fading away, hiding from him. He had finally gained her trust once again but only after pleading for forgiveness and showed her his pain at what he had done to her. They had grown closer still and hadn't let it pry them apart but still, the damage was done. He had taken her on a journey for a time but only ended up in disaster, when they'd only been to fix the damage and mend their hearts. Their love for each other was deeper than blood. But still, only pain and tears were the last moments together, but the love between them was still there. She couldn't even bear to remember how she had been his undoing. Pain ripped through her heart but her inner demon was crying and wailing in its grief. Not only did she suffer but her companion did so as well in their mind. He was gone and he, his human mate, and their son had all suffered because of her mistake, her weakness. Of her influence. If she hadn't met him.. her teeth clenched. Inuyasha would have his father and so would Sesshomaru. The fate of all those in his life would have been different. But was it regretful? Everyone was happy. But how she wished he was alive. During their last moments despite what she had done.. he had forgiven her and still loved her as his own. His daughter, he called her one last time.

She tightened her grip on her upper arms almost ceasing the blood flow in her agony. Why! She would never escape the pain from the loss of the two people who cared most for her that she could remember. They had been like her parents. But they were gone. Leaving her alone. The only one remaining from their group of three. The last one standing. Tears gushed down her face like waterfalls now and sobs shook her entire body. All her fault…

'It's our fault..' her inner demon groaned.

'Our fault..'

'What will they say when they discover our part in his death.. the loss of the greatest demon of his age?'

'Hate us.'

No response but Hoshi stilled at the scent of blood. What on earth? Slowly raising her head she glanced at her upper arms to find she had torn into the sleeves of her kimino and tore into her own flesh with her talons. Blood dripped from the wounds even worse than the tears dripping from her face. She'd injured herself? The sleeves of the gray kimino were ruined, permanently stained red by her blood. She was feeling woozy from the loss of blood. How much blood had she spilt before she noticed the damage? Standing to go to her healing kit and herbs she swayed lightly on her feet before stumbling to the ground landing in a rather large but still growing puddle of blood. She'd lost more blood than she thought? Her vision began to blur.

'No no no,' she groaned. 'Not now!'

What would Sesshomaru say if he saw her in this state and the fact she'd injured herself? She glanced at the wounds on her upper arms and the damage was a lot worse than she had originally thought. Hoshi had completely ripped apart her upper arms on both sides leaving torn up muscles behind. She began to drag herself across the floor hoping to get to her bandages before completely collapsing. She had lost far too much blood and the damage was great. Not only did she have mental and emotional pain now to deal with but physical. She laid there for a long moment before she began to get dizzy. She felt her eyes closing as she began to slip into unconsciousness. Her last thought was the most painful she had experienced in a long time, even worse than the memories…

'Inutaisho.. Izayoi..'

Hoshi fainted.

Well that ruins the surprise of who the unknown demon is XD but I kinda gave it away a bit ago so might as well? Hmm I wonder what part Hoshi played in his death.. I ain't tellin till later! When will she tell Sesshomaru, Rin, and the others? This chapter I mainly wanted to focus on Hoshi's past a bit so you all could get a picture of what happened soooo cool? Hope you guys enjoyed a memory from Hosh's past with her and Inutaisho.. does it go well? I don't know his personality completely well (Inutaisho's) but I imagined him to be kind, compassionate, and loyal but at the same time serious, protective, and powerful. Ya know? Anyways, enjoy and review plz? Reviews make me happy and let me know if your all enjoying it

P.S. Sorry for taking such a long time to post this, but I'm learning to manage my time better so I can get chapters posted! Anyways, enjoy! Also, I'm sorry if this sounded a bit.. emo? I apologize if this offends anyone..