EPOV:

My ears were ringing, all I knew was, there was Sookie, there was me, and there was the damn headboard that kept slamming against the wall. I didn't care though, and it seemed she didn't either - she was totally lost in her pleasure. Her eyes were shut tight and she was chanting my name, Jesus and God over and over. It was exhilarating, to say the least, since I could feel her muscles going crazy with what I was doing to her It took every ounce of self control not to just lose it the second I slipped inside her. But as felt her clench around me for what I thought was the third orgasm- I'd managed to shockingly hold out long enough to give her - I lost myself. We were a sweaty mess of limbs and kisses by the time we both fell onto our respective pillows. I could feel my heart in my ears and her heavy breathing next to me.

"Holy shit…" I managed, ever the articulate.

"I think my heart is going to explode." She panted and I just rolled over to her again, slipping my hand over her heart. It was beating extremely fast and she was covered in a delectable sheen of sex sweat that- call me caveman if you like- but I was proud to have put there.

"I'll be right back." I said, kissing her quickly on the cheek before I walked into the bathroom to clean up. Safety was always important, but it was messy as hell.

I got back to my room to find her tangled in my sheet, looking sexy as anything.

"Hi," I said with a smile as I climbed back in.

She smiled back, "I can't believe we just did that…"

"I can…" I kissed again, this time lazily, slowly and making sure I didn't pull away until I knew I had her breathless again.

I was more than ready for round two as I got reacquainted with those rather amazing breasts of hers, as well as allowing my fingers to do a little exploring of their own. She was still extremely sensitive and it felt incredible.

She reached for my face, making me look at her, taking me away from her body.

"Again?" She asked in a sleepy voice.

"We lost out on a little foreplay before…" I reasoned.

She laughed "What do you call the last six months?"

I flipped us over, bringing her on top of me where we just laid, continuing the lazy kisses as I slipped both my hands into her hair, she moaned slightly. I latched onto her breasts and massaged until she started to shift her hips, her nipples pebbling under my finger and thumb. She started to grind her lower half against me. It would have been so easy to bury myself inside her again, unprotected, but I knew that's not what either of us wanted, nor were we ready for.

Instead she reached over to my bedside table, and found what she was looking for.

"May I?" She asked too sweetly since her eyes were filled with mischief.

I just nodded.

Instead of simply rolling it on and letting us get down to business, she rolled it to the tip and then all I felt was her hot mouth roll it the rest of the way before my eyes rolled back in my head.

But she didn't stop there. No, she took me in her mouth and started to give me one very unexpected blowjob. I knew she was getting off on my reactions to her mouth on me, but it's not like it was something I could control. I'd gotten to know myself real well these last few months, alone and sexless, and having glorious, naked Sookie go to town on me was like I'd won the lottery.

As much as I never wanted her to stop what she was doing, I knew if she kept it up, I wouldn't have lasted as long as I wanted too, and I wanted to be inside her again more than anything. This time she took the reins, gently at first, then harder and faster until she gripped for the headboard- my poor abused headboard- to give her the leverage she needed to keep up her good work. I'd decided this angle was my favourite angle for Sookie. It worked so well for her- what with her being naked and straddling me and all.

Determined to make her come before I did, I worked my thumb inside her just right, causing her hips to pop faster and her breathing to get louder. I knew she was close, so I pinched that little ball of nerves and within seconds, she was moaning into my neck as she came, allowing my to surrender my control over myself as well. We were a mess to say the least. I smoothed some of her hair from her face as she collapsed beside me, light-headed and spent. I stripped the condom, tied it and aimed for my wastepaper basket before I curled myself around her as she faced the window away from me.

"So tired," she mumbled, her breath slowing down as she pulled my arms around her waist, bring me closer as we spooned. As tired as I was, I savoured the moment for what it was; just laying there peaceful and exhausted. Why I did it, I'll never know. Maybe because I felt it, in that moment, or maybe I'd' felt it in the many moments before… but when I said it, I didn't think she'd actually hear it. It was barely a whisper, not even a breath, but I said it, and it changed everything.

"I love you…" I said to the darkness, knowing it was meant for her at some point, but not knowing she pretended to sleep more convincingly than I realised.

Everything changed.

SPOV:

I woke up aching just about everywhere. My head was pounding, my skin hurt, there was this dull pain between my thighs. I felt fucked, which I guess I was. Thoroughly so. It had been a long time- to say the least- since the last time that had actually happened. Between that and the hangover I just knew I'd have, I was questioning everything I did the night before.

I also woke up, I realised, wrapped in the arms of my housemate. I was facing away from him, but he was definitely wrapped around me. His large hands and arms around my waist, his face nuzzled into my neck.

And that's when I remembered. No, not the amazing, mind-boggling orgasms, or the intense sex that gave us both those mind-boggling orgasms. No, I remembered his words. Three words to be exact. Three words that had me on edge from the moment I woke up.

I felt him shift beside me before his grip tightened, pulling me closer to him and then I felt his lips on my neck…and God, that felt good.

No.

Focus.

"G'morning…" came his husky greeting.

"Morning." I said, still not making a move to face him, not entirely sure if was even able to.

"So I was thinking, we still have a few more hours before Jessica gets here… I vote we stay here and um, recreate, last night." I could hear the smile in his sleepy voice. I wanted to match it but I couldn't. Something was holding me back.

"Well, as delightful as that sounds, the house is a complete mess. We can't just leave it like that."

I turned to face him finally, and he looked sleepy but happy, his hair was sticking up in the back and all mussed at the front. Why was he so adorable? And why did I feel this bad?

"Sure we can, no one cares, Jessica doesn't care what the house looks like." he said, kissing my neck again.

"We should get up." I tried to pull away, but he didn't let go right away.

"Hello? You two hung-over assholes better be awake!" I heard from outside the room. It was Pam.

"Shit!" I said trying to find my clothes, then I remembered were across the hall.

"Sookie, why are you freaking out? It's not like we did anything wrong." He reasoned, just laying there as I tried to slip on his shirt.

"Where are yo- Ohh." came the obnoxious quip from Pam as she walked right into Eric's bedroom, finding us both in bed. I was in the middle of buttoning up a plaid shirt I found on his chair.

"My, my, my. I was wondering why it smelled like sex up here."

Amelia walked in after her to walk right back out again.

"Get out, Pam." Eric said firmly.

"Why? You aren't enjoying this awkwardness? I sure am." She stated with a wicked grin.

"OUT."

"Touchy." She quirked her brow before turning on her heels, "Nice breasts, Sookie."

"Oh God." I cringed into his pillow, but he just laughed.

"You know she's kidding. She doesn't give a shit, really."

"But… now they know."

"So?"

"So? Eric, this is personal and honestly, it wasn't something I was ready to share with the whole class just yet. Not when I'm still wrapping my head around it." I said as I shuffled the sheets to get out of the bed and finish buttoning up the shirt until I could get something else to wear.

"Wrapping your head around it? Sookie, no offence or anything, but what's there to wrap around? We had sex. It's been a long time coming, and it was great. And, might I add, we're good together. I see no reason for freaking out here." I said as he slipped on his boxers and a tank. "Unless there's something else?"

"No, it's just things are complicated enough as it is, and now … with this, it… just makes it more so."

He nodded, his happy mood quick to disintegrate. I knew I was the cause and I hated myself for it.

"So what you're saying is, last night was a once off? That because shit is so 'complicated' that us being together like that would be too 'difficult'. Is that what you're saying?"

"Please don't get mad at me, okay, I just… well don't you think maybe this isn't the best idea in the world? I mean, really, what happens six days, weeks, hours from now if we decide it's a mistake? Everything is ruined, Jessica is in the middle of this and we have to look out for her first."

"Don't use Jessica as your excuse, Sookie. You're scared."

"Well of course I'm scared, but my point still stands. This has to be nipped in the bud now. We can't be doing this." I walked out of his bedroom and into my own. He followed me.

"So then why do it at all? You could have said no. In fact, if I recall, I gave you ample opportunities to say no. It's not that hard."

"I know that."

"And? You still did it, three times, might I add."

"Seriously, you're mad?"

"Yes, I am mad, I'm …" he licked his lips, his face tinged with anger and maybe something else. I couldn't let myself think about what else he was feeling. This had to stop where it was before it got worse. If putting the fact that Jessica needed two parents without break-up baggage first, made me the bitch, then so be it.

My cell phone had been buzzing since I'd walked into the room. It was laying on my bed. The more I ignored it, the more it buzzed.

Eric looked at the name on the phone, which only seemed to piss him off even more.

"Sam? Seriously?" He looked from the phone to me.

"Well, I didn't know he was calling me, did I? I was in there with you."

"I thought you realised he wasn't right? So much for being on a break, huh?"

"Eric, don't."

The phone continued to buzz. Before I reached over to knock it off.

"Don't what? You sleep with me, but he still thinks he has a shot… you and I… it felt right and you know it. Hell, you can't deny that much."

"Eric it was…"

Amazing, wonderful, mind blowing? Any of those words could have fit rather nicely.

"Look, you know it was great, right? But come on, you and me? It wouldn't work. It couldn't, not in the long run, and that's where Jessica comes in. This isn't just about us, or sex, or whatever feeling led us there. If we go down that road, and we keep falling into bed together because it's easy and feels good and all of that, what happen when one or both of us gets bored, gets sick of each other, or want someone else?"

He motioned to say something but then stopped himself.

"Do you love him? Is that what this is about?"

There was that word again.

"This isn't about Sam; this is about you and me."

"Then why does he still think it's okay to be calling you, Sookie? Does Mr PHD not understand the meaning of the word 'break'?"

"Stop making this about him."

"But it IS about him, at least partly. You know he's no good for you! You both have nothing in common. Jesus, he can't even please you in bed, for fuck sake." he snapped.

"Who-"

It didn't matter who told him, but when he said it, it still stung.

"That's none of-"

"No, you know what, fine. You want him, fine. Go back to him. Hell, this tells me maybe you two deserve each other."

"You're angry right now so I think we just should go downstairs before one or both of us says something we shouldn't."

"No. I think we should say whatever we have to say now. When I kissed you that night Sookie, I meant it, and you didn't -"

"I -"

"No, you didn't. You thought you did, but you didn't. But I did, and what happened? We freak out… or not we - you, you freak out. And we end up not talking and everything is awkward. We finally make some progress… and then last night happened. After everything and after we've gotten closer, you're still freaking out. Why? I meant everything I did last night -"

"And everything you said?"

His face changed with the recognition of what I was talking about. Just then Amelia poked her head around my door.

"Sorry again, guys, but Pam's pissed that we're the only ones cleaning."

"I'll be right down." I told her, walking past Eric and our conversation to take the quickest shower of my life.

By the time I'd gotten down stairs again, Eric was gone. Judging by the faces being made by both Amelia and Pam, there had been words exchanged before he went. I just ignored both of them, popping the coffee to brew before making a start on the kitchen.

Worst morning ever.

By two pm, Jessica was back and as hyper as ever. Pam and Amelia helped like they promised and after the first hour of silence, Pam broke it only to tell me they were leaving. They were mad at me, Eric was mad at me, I was mad at me. He still hadn't come back by the time I'd made dinner. Having gone over and over what I might have said to him if he did, I still didn't have a proper answer. He was right; I was scared of what he and I meant. I was even more scared of what it meant if it ended. I'd lost my family as a kid and it sucked, but I had my Gran. Without her love and caring environment, it would have been so much harder. But then I might as well have lost my brother when I lost my Gran. I never saw or heard from him and he didn't seem to want to hear from me. I'd lost two families. The one we'd worked on creating for Jessica wasn't one I was going to lose just by being an idiot who couldn't control her hormones.

He said he loved me. But realistically, how could he? I was a mess, anyone could see that, and really it was more than likely post-orgasmic babbling. I mean with how we were, I almost said it to him. Factoring in how long it had been since a man was able to make my body react like that? And even the last time it had happened, it felt nothing like how it felt with Eric. Definitely not with Bill, and certainly not with Sam. I knew Sam and I were over. If I was honest, I'd known it a while ago, but he'd become a good friend to me. Losing that was something I wasn't ready for before. So when the phone rang again after eight, and it was Sam, I answered.

"Hey."

"Hey yourself. I know this whole break thing is still on but, I just wanted you to know I'm sorry for whatever it was that upset you before. I didn't mean to."

"Sam, I know. And it's sweet of you to keep apologising but really, like I said before, there's no need."

"I miss you." He said sweetly, and honestly it's not like I could say the same.

"See what I mean? Sweet." I smiled "How's the conference?"

"Boring. Necessary, but boring. I'm back tomorrow, maybe we could get lunch, talk properly…"

"Sam-" I turned around to find Eric standing in the doorway to the kitchen and he was even more surly than the last time I'd seen him. "Uh, Sam can I call you back?"

"Something wrong?"

"No, not … no just let me call you back, okay?"

"Okay, sure…" he sounded doubtful but I didn't care as I hung up the phone and looked at Eric.

"You're back."

"Mmhm." He crossed his arms and I noticed he'd changed his clothes. He was wearing his dark jeans and a green t-shirt.

"We'd you go?" I asked hoping to strike up a conversation at least.

"Out."

"I know that, I asked where?"

"None of your business."

Oh, so this was how it was going to be?

"Very mature."

"Yeah, well that's me, Mr. Mature. Look, I just came back to grab a few things. I won't be staying."

My heart, quite rightly, sank.

"What?"

"I'm moving out."

"What? You-"

"I'll still be around for Jessica, and we'll still have our schedules. I just won't be staying here."

"I see."

It was then that I noticed his sports bag by the kitchen door.

"Where will you go?" I asked quietly and he just shrugged.

"Pam's, for now until I find a place suitable. If CPS had an issue with that we'll work it out, I'm sure."

"So, you're just moving out, just like that?"

He looked at me then, and his once warm eyes were suddenly so cold it almost made me shiver.

"Why wouldn't I? It's not like there's anything keeping me here, is there?"

Before I had the chance to speak again, he turned, grabbed his bag and walked. A few seconds later I heard the front door shut tight.

In trying to keep our makeshift family together, I'd only served to break it apart. Where the hell did we go from here?

A/N: SURPRISE ANGST. It's like surprise rape but even less fun, isn't it? Sorry, bad joke. But *inhale* *exhale* It's all going to be okay… I think. Thank you all so much for the review love on the last two chapters, if I didn't get back to you, I apologize. Real life and this muse decided to kick my ass. But I thank you for the love all the same!

Big thanks to Makesmyheadspin for beta'ing this one so I could post before I hit the hay tonight. I'll see in the morning what you guys think! :D