For Future Reference: 'Effing, 'Effin, Effin, Effing...are to be thought of as the zomgoshes...F BOMB...FREAK OUT! I just don't want to corrupt the younglings...yet...
Of Cursed 'Effin Marriages
"I will string you up by your damn effin entrails if what you just said isn't true, Cid."
Well...Cid was right...Barret does have a mouth to rival his own. That was only mildly violent...and in front of Marlene. Ye gods! What has the world come to?
Cid sighs, "You don't 'effin believe me, dumbass?"
Shera's in the corner blushing; there's an assortment of reactions. Reeve had just descended the steps to hear Cid's glorious announcements. Nanaki's ears perked up, Yuffie jumped up and down and then hugged Shera; Denzel was making a face, and Marlene was exclaiming about dresses. I believe I even saw a 'shift' to Vincent's eyebrows. I think they raised upward. Amazing. Cid got reaction from Vincent. Props to Cid, mad props. I think that's my new favorite word...props...
But the most interesting reaction is Tifa's. She's frozen. In fact, her spoon of soup is still frozen in the air between herself and the bowl. It's the only noise in the now silent room...drip...drip...drip.
She recovers though, returning the spoon to the bowl, and pausing for a moment.
"Well...I think it's safe to say that's the only marriage announcement that's ever been told with curse words." She merely states, and goes back to stirring the soup.
The group sits there a moment, digesting what she just said. Yuffie's the first to let out a snigger, then Barret coughs in an attempt to cover his smile. Nanaki buries his face in his paws, and even Vincent sinks deeper behind his high collar.
And then Yuffie's cackling with laughter on the floor, gripping her sides. Shera follows her, bent over in the middle, tears watering up in her eyes. Marlene and Denzel are thoroughly confused, and Barret just pats Marlene's head and laughs. Cid is looking angry, however...and Tifa doesn't seem to be laughing at all.
"Now wait just one damn minute, jackasses!"
And more laughter ensues. Nanaki even lets out a light chuckle. Vincent is silent, but he lets out a 'hmph' and I swear I think I see amusement in his eyes.
"What's so damn funny? I'm getting married! Shouldn't you be congratulating me?"
And now my mouth is twitching. Tifa's got a smile, but she's trying to hide it behind her hair. Everyone's rolling about with laughter by now...excluding Vincent, of course. Laughter is above him. Duh.
Once again...thank God Zack isn't here.
I'm even having to brace myself against the doorframe. What a morning this has turned out to be. I went from playing mission impossible, to getting scolded by Cid of all people, to this...Cid getting married. Now that's a laugh in itself.
"Well...I'm sure it'd be different if it were anyone else, am I right?" He barks.
The answer is laughter.
"OF course it would be! Can't take Cid serious, can ya? No sirrie, because just look at little miss Yuff over here laughing her scrawny little ninja ass off!"
Yuffie's frozen on the floor, a look of death in Cid's direction.
"She's just soooo serious...and nobody would laugh at all when she announced her engagement to Mr. I'm-not-really-a-vampire-just-manic-depressive over there."
Oh...oh snap. Vincent will kill you Cid...make you dead. You'll never get married!
Okay, but I'm laughing now, that last line cracked me up.
"And noble Sir Barret here! Tah! I like to see the day Elmyra will accept his deceleration of love!"
OH...he did not just say that...at least Yuffie's laughing again, and Vincent doesn't look so peeved off. He's back to his usual pissed off self. That's good.
Marlene jumps up, "Dad's marrying auntie Elmyra?"
"CID!" Barret barks.
Looks as if Barret could do some serious physical harm...and may even do what he stated earlier to Cid.
"And of course the day Reeve hooks himself up with a nice Turk...we'll all just sip some damn fricken tea and rejoice."
I...I don't even have words for that.
I can't even express the look on Reeve's face.
Priceless...that's all I have to say.
"And they can even have a double wedding with Nanaki! It'll be great! The day he marries a common house cat mixed with a wolf whose somehow miraculously managed to figure out how to talk...or at least meow yes or no."
Oh...Dude...you do realize Nanaki had teeth, claws...and a flaming tail? Not someone you want to bash.
So Reeve joins back in on the laughter...everyone's laughing currently except Nanaki...as he's been Cid's latest victim.
Oh...oh no.
"And the day Mr. I-will-fricken-impale-your-ass-with-my-giant-gravity-defying-spikes..."
Do I need to even say who he's talking about?
"...Announces his engagement with Ms. High-and-Mighty-Perfect-Mother over there..."
Cid! Cid! No! Cid! Stop!
"... we'll all just sit around and laugh about the time Barret almost found them in bed together."
Squeak.
I'm not sure if that came from Tifa or me.
Silence...
...pure...
...sheer...
...silence.
After all that work! After all that trash! The humiliation! The embarrassment! THE BIG EFFING PUDDLE! You just told Barret that Tifa and I were in bed together! I didn't start this! What the hell, man? What the hell!
I can't...I just can't look at Barret. I swear, his eyes will kill me. Oh...fear...oh fear.
"Well...actually..." Vincent states.
His voice makes everyone's head dart up.
"That doesn't sound too farfetched."
"Yeah...I could see that." Yuffie states.
"That is rather plausible." Nanaki replies.
"It'd be quite the celebration." Shera nods her head.
"And I could bring cake." Reeve adds.
"Cloud and Tifa get married?!" Marlene exclaims.
"So then I'd have a mom and a dad?" Denzel asks, incredulous.
With each comment I see Tifa bow her head further down behind her hair, and with each comment I can feel the heat on my face rising.
I've got to be about as red as a tomato right now.
"As long as there aren't any rats involved," Barret states, crossing his arms, a sneer across his face. "I'm alright with it."
I think I've just died.
I mean, what do you say to that? What is it exactly that you say to your friends agreeing on a marriage proposal you haven't even thought of? I mean, my God...they just found out we were a couple yesterday and already they're planning our wedding!
There is only one solution to this.
I turn around and walk out the door.
I just need a breather here.
No, my friends did not just discuss my wedding.
No, they are not laughing at me right now.
No, I am perfectly fine.
Yep...just fine...
...well...actually...
Nope.
Shit.
A/N: Short, I know. Cloud cursed! He is thinking there at the end...and even if we are in his mind...he still remains mysterious. Only Cloud can do that. And yes...Cid did curse in the last chapter...and with that note up there, it makes it official. And for those who were like...Cid...care? I know, farfetched, but he got his revenge...and that always evens the playing field. Woo! We broke 200! You guys rock. hello to new comers! like Sparx Alchemist...that was quite the review, thank you. And REND NO! I am not losing interest! I had a momentary lapse...writers block would've been a more appropriate term, I suppose. But I just have to be in one mood to write this story, and same goes for others. Anyways! And poster-fic? WOW...I won't object. I got C'2d again! Silent Men and the women who love them...that's a mouth full. Thanks to TionneDawnstar for that! And THANKS TO EVERYONE! I posted a new pic up on deviantart/homepage...considor a gift to you guys...enjoy! Tis from Come Together. Hopefully I'll be doing more of those. Till next time, my loves!