Reverse! Reverse!

"Wachoo!"

Tifa flinches next to me, as I scratch my nose.

"…alright?" she mumbles, still sleepy.

"Yeah, just need…nee-ne-n- ACHOO!"

Sniff.

"Just need to blow my nose," I groan, standing up.

"Kay."

She seems unperturbed.

Good lord, how long have we been asleep? I think I hear Yuffie's voice echoing down the hallway outside. I yawn, moving slowly into the adjoined bathroom. Sneezing is so bloody annoying. Though, it is kind of gratifying, sneezing. It's such a release when you sneeze…I mean, why else would you get pissed when someone stopped you just before that sneeze? That oh so gratifying sneeze.

Sniff.

They still suck though, despite redeeming qualities.

I blow my nose, and toss the toilet paper in the trash, yawning, raising my eyes to the mirror and…

"AH!" Tifa screams beside of me, her hands flying up to her mouth.

I narrow my eyes, looking towards her quickly, "What…" I ask suspiciously.

She gasps, waving her hands and jumping up and down, "OH. MY. GOD. Oh my God! Cloud!"

I frown, annoyed, "What, Tifa?"

Honestly, what could be the problem here?

"What did you do to your hair?!" she screeches, before bringing her fist up to her mouth and chewing on her knuckle.

It's a bad habit she does when she's nervous.

I sigh, lifting my eyes to the mirror…

Ohshitohshitohshitohshitohshitohshit…

I didn't do it!

But I have no words…I can't speak. I can just point…point at this gaping hole in my hair. This can't be happening. This can not be happening. What the hell is this?! It isn't…even like…I can't even explain it!

"Your hair has a valley, Cloud! It's a reverse Mohawk!" she rapid fires out of her mouth, before returning to chew on her knuckle.

Finally, I find my voice, "Thank you, I'm aware," I manage to squeak out.

It's true. Someone has buzz cut my hair straight down the middle. It is in fact a reverse Mohawk. This is wrong…this is so wrong. What the hell happened?!

She's staring at me with these big, wide eyes, but I don't know what to say!

I subconsciously run my hand through my hair, which obviously only serves to make me even more angrier, since…well, since there's freaking gaping hole in my spikes!

"…so I guess that's what that buzz was," Tifa mumbles offhandedly.

I turn my shocked eyes to her, "Is that all you can say?"

"It's more than you!"

Hello! Let's focus on the problem here! My hair! This…just doesn't happen!

I'm panicking, and Tifa can see that, so she grabs my arms and guides me to sit down on the toilet.

"It's okay," she soothes, "It's just hair."

I grab a lock of hers and dangle it in her face.

She glares at me, narrowing her eyes, "Mine's different. It's a guy gets a buzz cut, it's manly. If a girl gets one it's freaky. Would you really like me to shave my head?"

I shake my head slowly.

"So, we're okay…we'll just have to finish it," she starts fishing around in the drawers.

"What?"

"Would you rather go out there like that, or with a buzzed head? Don't forget Yuffie will be joining our party soon."

Damn.

"Who…"

Tifa shakes her head, "I don't know."

She's recovered quickly, lifting a razor up in one hand.

"Are you ready?" she asks, extremely serious.

Do I really have a choice?

I nod my head once, and she clicks the razor on, the familiar buzz filling the small bathroom.

She leans in close, slowly lowering the razor, and the carnage commences.

I exit the small bedroom a changed man.

My hair…is gone. Buzzed so short it leaves an oh so fuzzy sensation when you rub your hand across it. For this reason, Tifa has lowered my now fuzzy wuzzy head to her cheek on several occasions to rub it.

"At least it feels nice," she smiles.

I stare.

And she looks away.

Awkward moment.

We move down the hallway, back towards the crowd, but Tifa grabs my hand and stops me.

"Cloud, before you go in there…"

And that's when I see him. And I know it's him because I can see blonde flecks of what was once spiky hair on his blue t-shirt. That little devil spawn that looks oh so much like his uncle.

Benny.

I practically hiss the word, and Tifa blinks, cutting short suddenly.

Apparently someone took Grandpa Grant's advise a bit to seriously.

And as an excuse to completely mess with my freaking HEAD! Literally!

The boy freezes, looking up at me, a sudden grin cracking his face and falling in all of about three seconds.

Doom, boy…doom.

And he's running, and I'm running, and Tifa's shouting something about…well, who gives a damn at this point. The boy is mine.

Damn, I wish I had that razor.

He runs through the doorway at the end of the hall…lots of laughter and talking, and surprised shouts, but I keep going like the fool I am.

I burst through the door, eyes wild, nostrils flared (they have a tendancy to do that when I'm angry), and muscles tense. My jaw is clenched tightly as I search the room, but there's something completely wrong with this picture.

Everyone is dead silent, not moving…like some kind of freaky 3-D picture.

And they're all staring at me.

Yuffie's jaw is hanging open, a disgruntled Reeve beside her, whose hand was frozen behind her head, obviously in keen position to smack her. Marlene is on Barret's knee jaws gapping as well. Denzel's with Nanaki, and Vincent, hell Vincent is staring at me with open shock. Granted, his jaw isn't open, but Vincent is displaying this emotion openly in public.

And the list goes on and on.

There's a shattering sound to my right as Cid drops his tea cup, and that sort of breaks the spell. Someone pressed play.

"Where's the boy?" I ask.

Reeve smacks the back of Yuffie's head.

"Ow! What the hell?" she shoots her eyes at Reeve, then looks at me, "What the hell?!" she gestures wildly…at me.

"Boy. Now." I've resulted to Neanderthal speak.

"No. What the hell?! Now!" Yuffie sputters.

I narrow my eyes, and Tifa rushes in behind me, clutching my arm to keep me in place.

"They won't believe you," she leans into my ear, whispering fertively.

"What?" I turn on her.

"They won't believe you, not Cid's family, and certainly not Grant. Now is not the time, you have no proof."

"The boy has no alibi. I take him now."

"Cloud! He's a ten-year old boy for goodness sakes! Are you that conceited and vain to think that you can't survive without your spikes?!" she whispers, yet somehow manages to scold me.

I feel my face burn.

"No," I reply hotly.

It's a matter of pride.

"Lover's spat."

"Yuffie!" Tifa hisses, before turning back to me, "Listen…just…leave it. No harm done, right? It's okay…you needed a trim anyways."

"I didn't want to go bald." Anger anger anger.

"I know, just…try…try and understand?" she asks, "You can't win this battle."

"I'll win the war."

"Okay, Cloud, okay."

Tifa sighs deeply, turning her eyes out to the crowd, still staring in open shock.

"What are you all staring at?" she bites vehemently towards them.

"Nothing, nothing," comes the ashamed, scattered replies.

Everyone quickly shuffles around awkwardly as Tifa cracks her knuckles. She grips my hand tightly in her own, before towing me over towards Yuffie and Reeve.

Yuffie at least (surprisingly) has enough presence of mind to stare at Tifa. Reeve still stares at my now non-existent hair.

"So…what's up?" Yuffie asks nervously, her eyes flicking towards me every couple seconds.

Reeve blinks, "Your…hair…is…gone."

I glance at Tifa, "Can I punch him?"

She grips my arm tighter as Reeve flinches, "Cloud…please…calm down," she turns her attention to Yuffie, "I fell asleep with gum in my mouth, and it got stuck in Cloud's hair."

"Exactly what position were you in for this to happen?" Yuffie asks.

"It doesn't matter," Tifa rolls her eyes, "I'm going to spread the word. Behave…all of you."

Tifa moves away quickly, trying to contain the problem before it spreads.

"What the hell happened?" Barret hisses as he walks up.

"Yeah, that was a load of bull—

"—shit right there, wasn't it?" Cid finishes Yuffie's sentence.

"The boy," I say.

"Benny," Cid gruffly mumbles.

"You knew?"

"No…well…Benny…well, he's Benny."

"Benny is dead," I reply.

"Cloud," Cid says slowly, "He's family."

"So was his hair!" Yuffie shouts, rubbing my fuzzy head, "Oh…soft."

I slap her hand away, "Yeah, what about my hair? What are you going to do about it Cid?"

He shrugs, "Nothin…ain't my kid," he scratches his chin, "I'm just ashamed I didn't think of it first."

Yuffie giggles and I send her a silencing glare.

"But seriously," Cid grunts, "This doesn't seem like Benny's work…he's usually more creative than this."

…yeah…not going there.

"Anyways, we've got about a half hour till we land, so get ready," Cid says.

I sigh, shaking my head slowly. At least my hair grows quickly.

"Hey," there's a soft voice to the left, "What's this?"

We all look over, glancing at Tifa whose picked something up off the ground.

She stares at it…it looks like a Polaroid. She frowns, and then her eyes go wide, before she frantically searches the floor for more.

Yuffie narrows her eyes, spotting one on the ground and picking it up. She flips it right side up, and lets out a snort, a couple words escaping. She quickly tries to mask it, but I already heard what she said.

"Reverse Mohawk."

I narrow my eyes, wrenching the picture from her hand.

…you've got to be freaking kidding me.

Suddenly, the former members of the once great AVALANCHE have been reduced to scrambling around on their knees on the floor of an airship, trying to salvage all the pictures before anyone sees.

I vaguely register Benny being dragged off by his mother, his ear pinched between her thumb and forefinger.

Yuffie hisses at me, "We'll get real revenge this week, don't you worry."

I can only begin to imagine what she'll dream up.

I glance around the room, watching as each of my friends decline help from Cid's family members, and Shera's, trying to salvage what's left of my pride.

…huh…who would've thought these guys would've done this for me?

…that still doesn't fix the fact that this whole thing freaking sucked.

Or the fact that they'll probably keep all the pictures for future humiliation.

Bastards.

A/N: hehehehe, hope you liked the chapter. To anyone whose curious for more shaving head experiences, you should definately check out Galaxia Alpha's There are three words in i love you or something like that...hell, anything by Galaxia. Course, the reverse mohawk was not inspired by that...that was actually a hairdo that me and my bud talked about once...XD so great. HOLY CRAP...did you know this story has gotten over 100,000 views?! THAT IS CRAZEH. So I want to thank you all for the views/alerts/favs/reviews. YOU MAKE MY DAy...hee...

Anyways, click it in teh profile for all those interested in a DevArt club...it's so sad right now! IT NEEDS YOUR HELP. Help it! Lurve ya!