Chapter VII – When the light dies out

Kozik and Happy got out of the building blinded by the summer sun and made their way back to Ray, Pete and Chance who all stood at the front. Chance had chosen a abandoned factory for the meet and Kozik and Happy had been asked to check out the surroundings make sure that if required they had a gateway.

As they walked silently, the killah shot his friend a look. He seemed distracted; his head wasn't in the game. "Hey, Kozik, you alright brother?"

"What?"

"You've been acting all weird since we left Precious Pete's house. All silent and shit."

He had to look pretty out of it if Happy was asking questions."I'm good man. Just thinking through some stuff."

"Whatever shit is, forget about it and pull your head out of your ass. We need you with your head in the game."

Kozik couldn't agree more. But forgetting about it, about her was easier said than done. He was furious. He couldn't believe he had let himself be played like a school boy. The little princess had toyed with his mind, getting herself under his skin making him want things he shouldn't have wanted and she had turned out to be Lethal Ray's daughter. And yet, it wasn't what pissed Kozik off the most. He realised he had liked her. He had actually wanted to know her and now there was nothing he could do about it. She was off limits. He would have to stay as far away from Ella Strickland as he could and in the end he realised that that was what bothered him the most. But Happy was right, he had to set anything else aside and get his head in the game. "Yeah, man."

They reached the group and Happy nodded to Chance "Where's Romero?"

"On his way."

Kozik couldn't help but notice the tension between Ray and Pete. Even unspoken, it was still clear as day. His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of roaring motorcycles. He looked up and saw four motorcycles drive in their direction. Ray's phone range and he looked at the caller ID before silencing it as Romero made his way towards them flanked by three other Mayans

"What happened to coming alone Ray?"

"Guess I didn't trust you to keep your word. Looks like I was right"

Romero smirked. They both knew that there was no way in hell that two presidents of rival charters would show up to a meet without reinforcements. "Shall we?"

Ray lead the way and the two men moved away from the group leaving their men to stare each others down. "You ever feel the weight of the years, Ray?"

"Please don't tell me you brought me all the way here to get fucking philosophical on me."

Romero let out a small laugh. "No. I just think about it a lot lately. You know, drugs is a dangerous business. Last ten years, I lost most of my trusted men fighting the black and the chinese. Those who are not in prison are dead. The men you see there are what's left. So I had to renew the ranks, let in a few bad seeds. "

"Let me guess, we're talking about your VP?"

Romero avoided the question and lit a cigarette. "I think it's time for a clean up amongst the Mayan ranks. "

"That's very wise."

"Change will not happen quickly Ray. I need you to hold off on retaliation."

"Are you fucking delusional? I lost a man. My men lost a brother. They want blood. And I'm going to give it to them."

"And I will give bit to you. But I need time. Juan has a strong hold over current members. I need to set up some alliances outside my charter to out him. But I understand your men need for blood. I'm ready to give you the rat who gave you out to Juan. In exchange you hold off on any retaliation."

Ray looked at Romero, trying to decide whether he could trust the man to hold his part of the bargain. "The name."

Romero smiled knowing they had reached an understanding. "Lenny Cox. All I know is he lives out of town."

"Romero, this is a stay of execution. But don't take too long to clean house, or our deal is off. And I'm coming for you." Ray concluded threateningly before walking back towards his men.

"We have the rat's name. Lenny Cox. I want an address on this son of bitch."

"Lenny?" Pete exclaimed. "That's the club's bouncer. I know where he lives."

"Let's move then. Chance call the others and have them meet us."

If his men were wondering what else had been said between Romero and Ray, none of them asked openly. They knew better than to question Lethal Ray when he was on a mission.

Ella let out a frustrated sigh before throwing her phone back into her purse. She had been trying to get a hold of Ray since the ambulance had showed up at the ranch. Once they reached the hospital, her mother had been taken in straight away and Ella had been asked to remain in the waiting room. She had been pacing for the last half an hour waiting for someone to give her news. The doors finally opened and Ella's recognized her mothers' doctor walking towards her.

"Ella"

"How is she?"

"We've managed to stabilize her and put her on oxygen. She's awake."

Ella felt a huge sense of relief come over her it was short lived as he looked at the doctors sombre face and saw he was not done. He seemed to search for the right words for a moment before continuing." Ella, your mother's body is shutting down. I don't know how much longer she'll be able to fight."

"What...what does that mean?"

"I think it's best to say your goodbyes."

Elle felt like someone had punched her in the stomach and struggled to breathe. Of course, she had known her mother's health was deteriorating and had reached a critical stage. But knowing is different from living it and she felt like she had just been thrown in quick sand and couldn't move. Things were moving too quickly, she still had so many things she wanted to tell her mother, things she wanted to do with her, she didn't have a clue of how to begin to say goodbye to someone who meant that much to you.

"I don't understand. I just... I'm not ready."

The young doctor looked at her with empathy. "We're never ready to say goodbye but we do. " She thanked him and took a deep breath before following him through the swing doors. He led her to her mother's door room. He gave her an encouraging nod. "She's waiting for you."

Ella slowly opened the door and let herself in the sterile room. Her mother was lying on her back, eyes closed, an oxygen mask on her face. When she saw Ella, she smiled. Ella managed a weak smile in response before making her way to her mother's side.

"Hi" was all she managed to say before breaking down. She let out a sob and hid her face on her mother's bed.

Nell removed her oxygen mask and stroked her daughter's luscious hair. "Ella, my sweet baby."

Ella took a hold of herself and straighten up to face her mother. "I'm so sorry mum."

"You have nothing to apologise for, baby." She caressed her daughter's cheek. "I'm so glad to see you."

Elle closed her hand on her mother. "I'm not ready to lose you."

"You are never going to lose me, Ella. My beautiful baby girl. I am right here and my love for you will never die."

"I love you too mum."

"Would you do me a favour? Would you read for me? I'm feeling quite tired."

Ella looked at her mother with all the love in the world. "Yes."

Kozik waited for the signal from Happy and kicked the door in and they ran into the run down house followed by Ray and the rest of the brothers. As per the plan, they all divided searching the house for the rat. He had been searching in the bedrooms and it was obvious no one was here. "Clear." One by one, the boys came back with the same conclusion.

Chance walked back from the kitchen. "Asshole must have known we'd come for him and went in hiding."

Ray was seething, he did not like playing cats & mouse. Fuming, he lifted the coffee table with one hand and sent it flying against the wall. "Son of a bitch! Find him, take this place apart inch by inch if you have to!I want him found!"

Pete appeared, running back from the back of the house. "Ray, that was Ella. it's Nell, she's at the hospital. It's bad man. We got to go."

Ray's face remained unreadable. He didn't look panicked, or even surprised. He looked back at Chance and repeated. "I want him found." before following Pete outside. Happy and Kozik looked at each other then at Chance wondering what they should do. " Jimmy, you stay with me, Teas and Blind Tom. Wiz, get back to the range and see what you can find out with your magic fingers. Hap Kozik you watch their backs."

Kozik nodded, although the last thing he wanted to do was head to the hospital and take the risk to bum into little miss sunshine but then he could hardly explain that to the guys so he just followed Happy as they took their bikes to catch up to the president and his VP.

The ride didn't take long and after catching up to Ray and Pete, they were at the hospital in ten minutes.

They asked for their way and followed the indications until they reached a long corridor and spotted Ella sitting straight up on a chair, staring off into the distance . Kozik and Happy remained back respectfully as the older men made their way to her.

Pete called out to her "Ella!"

She looked up but her face betrayed no reaction. She stood up as they reached her.

"Where is she?"

The question had come from her father. His voice finally seemed to bring her back to reality. "I've been calling you for hours, I left you a dozen voicemails." She said in a very detached manner.

"I was busy. Where is she?"

She sniggered softly "You were busy? That's it, that's all you have to say?"

"I don't have to justify myself to you Ella. "

"You're right, I really hope that whatever it was, it was worth it ignoring your dying wife for."

Ray clenched his jaw, his patience running out. "Elle, where is she?!"

"She's gone, Ray! She's dead. She stopped breathing an hour ago. But I guess you were too busy to listen to your voicemail." She spat before walking away.

Pete tries to stop her catching her arm. "Elle…"

She removed her arm violently "Don't!" and ran off. As she passed, Kozik had to fight the urge to stop her. He had to remind himself that she was Ray's daughter and none of his concern. But he knew of the pain of losing a parent and he did wish he could bear some of the pain for her. He reverted his look to Ray who had not moved an inch since Ella had told him his wife was dead.

Pete patted his old friend's back. " Ray..."

"I have to see her."

"Okay. Hap', call Wiz at the clubhouse and tell him to get Dorothy to the ranch. She'll know what to do. Tell the rest of guys to get to the range. I'll stay with Ray."

"No. I want a location on Lenny Cox."

"Ray, we can deal with this later."

"We're dealing with it now." He looked at Pete. "Get me an address."

After sending away Pete, Ray had talked to a doctor and asked to see his wife's body. Although it wasn't protocol once the body was moved, the young doctor had known better than to refuse a man like Ray Strickland so he had lead the old man to the basement where the morgue was and let him in the cold room while he pulled the white sheet over the body of the woman Ray had met nearly 30 years ago.

"I'd like a minute with her."

The doctor seemed to hesitate and once again decided it was best to just do as asked.

Ray took a nearby stool and sat beside the woman he had been married with for 25 years.. She was as beautiful as the day they had met. He had been taken with her from the moment he had laid his eyes on her and had believed he would never be able to look at another woman. After a short courtship, they had married and he had sworn to love her until death do them part. And he did love her. He had never stopped. He loved his daughter too even if they couldn't see it sometimes. Somewhere along the line he had lost them. He knew that. One day, Nell had looked at him and the love and respect in her eyes had been replaced with something else, a mixture of fear and contempt. Unable to face her, to look at the disappointment in her beautiful eyes, he had stopped sharing her bed and taken to other women to forget the pain of losing the love o f his life. Women who were more than happy to have a little attention from the MC president. But none of them had even begun to compare to Nell. No one ever would. It was now too late to change the past or to ask for her forgiveness. She was dead. He thought about the last conversation he had had with his wife. He had tried to hurt her, remarking she was the one holding their daughter back. He thought of the promise he had tacitly made to her. Maybe this would be his way to forgiveness. Protecting their daughter from a life in the MC even if that meant never seeing her again.

Ray stood and kissed Nell on her forehead whispering. " I promise." before leaving the cold room.

Pete had decided to wait for Ray at the hospital despite his orders. The rest of the guys were already working on locating Lenny and there wasn't much he could do. Besides, he had needed a few moments to gather himself. Nell's death was a shock. He tried to remember the last time he had seen had been a few weeks back, she had surprised him by coming to see him at the house, something she rarely did anymore.

"Nell?"

"Hi Pete."

She was sitting on the steps leading to his house. he wondered how long she had been waiting for him. "What are you doing here?"

"I was at the doctors, I just thought I'd drop by. I used to do it all the time, remember?"

"Nell..."

"Do you ever wonder? What would have happened? If you'd come with us that summer?" As he didn't reply, she just continued. "I think about it a lot. Even more lately. You would have been a great father Pete. Ella would have loved a little brother. Or wouldn't have mattered. He'd be 10 now. "

Pete bowed his head. He never allowed his thoughts to dwell on the past. Not anymore. It had taken him a long time to get over the guilt of what had happened that summer. He had done his best to pretend it hadn't and in his memory it was so foggy that he sometimes believed it had all been a bad dream.

The story began banally. They were two lonely people looking for a way to ease their pain and had found each other. He longed for the family he never had and she let him have that. In exchange, she found the companionship she so craved and he always thought that him being Ray's right arm in the MC was a big part of the attraction. Oh sure, they had loved each other but sticking it to Ray by leading a full blown affair with his best friend was definitely a bonus. So when she had found herself pregnant with absolutely no doubt on who the father was, since Ray had already stopped sharing her bed, they had devised a plan for them to leave and be the family they wanted to be. He had arranged the whole thing and on a June morning, Nell and her daughter waited until Ray had gone to the range before leaving forever. The plan was for Pete to join them a few months later when the baby was about to arrive and they were sure that Ray couldn't find them. But Nell's father had gotten sick and Pete made the mistake of letting her know on a rare phone conversation. Without telling him, she came back to down with the intention of saying her goodbyes and going back to Ella. But Ray had been waiting for her at the hospital and the rest was history. Knowing what would happen if Ray found out she was pregnant with another man's baby, a few days later, Nell had arranged an appointment at the clinic and that Pete had drunk himself into oblivion. And even though he had gotten his drinking under control after a few years, he knew it wouldn't have taken much for him to be a full blown alcoholic barely able to function let alone ride. It was only this perspective that kept him somehow sober.

"I know you blame me. For letting him find me, letting him bring me back here. If I hadn't, then I wouldn't have had to give up my baby. Our baby."

He had so many regrets about what had happened but no he had never blamed her for any of it. "I don't Nell. It just... wasn't meant to be. Why did you come here Nell?"

"It's over Pete. The doctors stopped all treatment. They're giving up. I guess I was just coming to say goodbye or maybe I just needed to hear you say this." She had kissed him softly on the lips and left him alone with his regrets.

Pete was so lost in his memories, he didn't even hear Ray come up to him. "Chance just called. We got him. He's at his old lady's house in Lakewood. Let's go."

And without a word, the vice-president followed.