Epilogue

Part C

I always thought the day that bastard Sephiroth showed his pasty white ass back up in front of Cloud would be the end of our problems. I always thought that after that stupid scrawny spiky-headed jerk gave Tifa the heart attack of a life time cos she thought he was dead, that that would be the end of all the shit we'd have to put up with.

I can't believe three months after those two idiots tied the knot that something like this would happen. Vincent…well, Vincent is fighting for something. I don't think any of us can figure out exactly what…course, Vincent might not even be able to figure out what he's fighting for. Lot of shit surrounding this, it is. DeepGround…fuckers need a more original name if you ask me. But does anyone ever ask me? No…because I'm old and ornery as Tifa once put it.

What the hell does ornery mean? She told me to look it up, and I told her to shove it up her ass.

Course, I had to apologize after that, but still! I'm not…whatever the hell it was.

I sigh, moving into the bedroom. There's a compartment in the bottom of the armoire, and inside of that is something I haven't had to use in a while. You have to hide these things, spears, when ya got a newborn.

God, I'm a father. I don't know who thought that was a good idea, but okay.

I never wanted a boring life…hell, I'm anything but boring. But dammit, I'm getting tired of having to grab my spear, hop on the airship and go off and save these idiots' asses!

I sigh, it's not like I'm going to say no, anyways. Dammit, I'm getting too freaking soft.

I guess that comes with havin a kid.

I stand, holding the spear in my hand. It's hard getting used to gripping this thing again. Hopefully Tifa can kick ass, and Cloud can use his mighty swords and I can just fly the fucking plane. I hope that's how it goes, anyways.

Shera's staring at me. Dammit, stupid woman. I hate it when she stares at me…makes me feel like I'm a freak or something.

I brush past her as I move out of the bedroom, propping my spear up against the wall. Gotta go kick ass and save the world again. I'm getting too damn old for this shit.

I move into the newest room of our house. It's pink. It's bloody pink…it's like walking into a damn cotton candy ball of fluff.

That's right…I Cid Highwind have successfully contributed to the birth of a little girl.

Now, it's not that I don't mind having a little girl, I did call it after all…it's just shit fellas, couldn't I of had a son first to watch after the girl? I mean…dammit, I'm going to have to kick some stupid punk's ass sixteen years from now. It means even if all this bullshit save the world crap ever does stop, I've got to still keep my spear so these little horny bastards don't take my daughter!

I sigh, leaning over the crib, looking down at the little pink wad. It's my little pink wad…mine.

God I am turning soft.

Scratch that, I've been soft.

Quick! Every curse word and dirty song you can think of!

OH—

Maria hiccups, and I lose my train of thought.

"Hi, Maria."

I put my hand on her forehead. It's amazing, this concept…babies…crazy. I mean, my hand is covering her forehead, and she's got the softest skin. I can't imagine my hands feel too good…man aren't they the tribute to the hard working man. There's a little spray of blonde hair on the top of her head. I almost wish it was brown.

I need a smoke.

Okay, so maybe Barret was right. Maybe I'll never quit smoking…outside the house, but dammit, I'm doing a pretty good job inside the house!

I swear, the world saving has the worst timing ever. I don't want to leave her…she's too little, my pink wad. She'll get hurt…yeah, lying in this crib. She's my kid…she'll figure out how to hurt herself just to piss me off.

Maria coos, breaking my thought again, and wraps her entire little fist around my finger.

She pulls on it.

"That's dangerous, kid."

She laughs, unknowing the danger that can come from pulling fingers.

Shera puts her hand on my back.

"Cloud called…he was wondering when you were heading out."

"Stupid impatient bast—

"Watch it…" Shera says softly.

"What? She can't understand me…can you little pink wad?" I tickle her stomach.

Shera sighs, resting her head on my shoulder.

I guess I could be more intimate…ya know the cuddly thing, but I'm not a pushover like Spike. I dunno, I always think this shit I should do before I go off and save the world. Doesn't matter, I know I'll have the chance to do it when I get back, even if I don't do it, I'll still have the chance.

What, you think I'm going to die?

I'm too stubborn to die.

I'm too fucking Cid to die.

A/N: I love Cid...he's straight to the point. Keep sticking around loves P: