It was about a month later when Marie's clothing began to feel a bit snug. She hated to go shopping- it seemed too real, too fun to do when her husband was still missing, presumed dead. But as Skylar had convinced her to go, reluctantly she agreed. Looking through some clothes that were just a size or two larger than what she normally wore- she was still too vain to even consider maternity clothes, something caught her eye.

Skylar was too distracted by something she'd discovered. "How about this? It's not purple, but it's a nice,pretty pink. I bet you would look awfully pretty in it..." she started until she noticed what Marie was holding up against her skin.

It was a blouse, a pretty, blue blouse. Skylar smiled. She knew that even if Marie wasn't ready to admit it yet, that she was hoping for a boy.

"Do you like this? It's a bit too much. It's a bit too showy,isn't it?" Marie started to put it back, but Skylar stopped her.

"I think it's perfect. I think if that's the one you want then you should get it. Would you like for me to get it? I have the part time job now..."

"No. It's okay. I have it. The department has been generous with their donations, and besides, I've been back to work a while myself. You know, maybe I will get it."

"Good for you. I know today won't be easy for you..."

"Why, because I'm meeting with Steve Gomez's wife? What am I supposed to tell her...that my life is peachy keen and I have something to always remind me of my husband while your husband may never..." she began to choke up.

"It's okay. I can go with you if you like."

"No. I've been putting it off for awhile now, but if I don't do it now, I'll never do it. Speaking of which, I suppose I'd better be going..." she started to walk off, but Marie stopped her.

"Don't you suppose you'd better pay for that?" Skylar teased gently.

"Oh, yeah. Old habits die hard. Kidding! I was going to pay for it! I really was!" Marie pulled back and went to pay for her purchase.

00000

An hour later, she was sitting in a cafe, face to face with the last person that she wanted to see. It wasn't as if she hated Amy Gomez; she'd always been friendly with Marie and was probably the one person in the world who could understand the predicament she was in.

"Marie," Amy smiled weakly. "How are you? You look well."

"Thanks, Amy. I'm sorry I haven't been in touch, but things have been kind of crazy..."

Amy reached out and touched Marie's hand. "It's okay. I understand. I really do."

"No, no you don't! I've been so selfish, only thinking of me and my loss when I haven't even bothered to call on you, to check on you, to see if I could do anything...you must hate me right now."

"You're not the one I hate," Amy said quietly but firmly.

"But it was my own brother-in-law! The man we had to our house every weekend! Surely you must think I'm stupid, or that Hank was..."

"I don't think that. I think that your husband was one of the bravest men I knew. I knew Steve and Hank had their differences, but I knew that Steve always trusted Hank. Always."

"And look where that got him!"

"Marie...look at me. It's okay that you're angry. It's okay that you're blaming yourself. I've been through it all, every bit of what you're feeling. I just know that something good will come out of all this..."

Now Marie was ready to lose it. "What good could possibly come out of all this! Your husband's dead, my husband's dead, that monster's on the loose...from what I understand he's still cooking! The nerve of that man!"

Realizing what she'd just said, Marie covered her face and began to sob. "Oh, Amy. I'm so sorry. I don't know what I'm saying half the time. I don't know what I'm supposed to think, what I'm supposed to feel. I just feel dead most of the time and it's all I can do to get out of bed in the morning."

"Pretty soon you're going to have the best reason of all to get out of bed every morning," Amy smiled knowingly.

Marie looked down at her stomach self-consciously. "You know?"

"One of the guys on the force told me. If truth be told, you're not the only one who's been avoiding this meeting. You see, I have a confession to make. I'm jealous."

Marie looked at her in shock. "You're jealous...of me?"

"You have something special growing inside of you. Part of your husband will always live on. Steve and I talked about kids but we never got around to it. He was always putting his job first, and I resented him for it. I fought with him all the time. I never got the chance to tell him I'm sorry, that I should have been more understanding, that if only I were a better wife..." Now it was Amy's turn to cry, and once again, Marie felt helpless.

Marie held her for a few minutes, and then finally broke away. "We'll get that bastard. He will never take another husband, another father, anyone."

"But don't you see, Marie? It's too late for us. Nothing that can happen to Walt can ever bring Steve or Hank back. Nothing."

Marie nodded, and for the next half hour, it was just the two widows, playing with their salads, thinking of all that they had lost. It was useless for the normally loquacious Marie to attempt to say anything; nothing she could say could make this right. But she gathered her strength and made one more silent vow: Walter White would pay, if it was the last thing she did.

TBC