Hey guys!

This chappie's a little longer than the first one, but please, by the words of Jashin (haha!), review. Comment, say anything you want, do something productive. (YOUR COMMENTS MAKE MY FREAKING DAY!)

Okay, a few things changed:

No full out swears. I'm kinda tired of using all of this bad language, and so… the words said (HIDAN ESPECIALLY) will be starred out. You'll know what swears, but they'll be bleeped out. No full blown cussing, though it makes me laugh. Just wanna be safe, ya know.

Also, this won't be just Akatsuki in this. Every character will show later. Trust me. One big ass party… and yes, ass will continue to be said, to me, it's not really a swear.

Fav, review, follow. You know the drill, sergeants!

2

Itachi stood watching the snowflakes out of the window across from him in his room, and sighed to himself. It was snowing heavily, and the fact that he wouldn't spend another Christmas with his secretly treasured brother would pain him yet again. Sasuke was still with that pedophile freak Orochimaru and his glasses wearing nerd sidekick Kabuto, and he's probably listened to too much Michael Jackson his ears had probably exploded. Itachi sighed yet again, quickly getting out of his seat and moving towards the living room… he was having the case of nostalgia.

He opened the door into the living room and spotted his partner sitting on the couch, flipping through the channels in boredom. The blue man recognized Itachi and grinned, showing a variety of sharp teeth.

"Hey, Itachi-san," greeted Kisame formally, "Here, come on, it's shark week on the Discovery Channel."

As much as Itachi wanted to join (note the heavy sarcasm), there was something tugging on his brain. "Kisame."

"Hm?"

"Don't you think, you know, that bad feeling you have in your stomach that we're going to have… another holiday? Remember the Halloween festivities last year?" Itachi shuttered, and then checked the window in a panic in search for any other stalkers, like his, Orochimaru. That snake-loving pedophile won't get him anywhere. Kisame laughed harshly about that previous night.

"Ha! You almost got kidnapped by Oro-snake; Tobi had a crazy sugar rush on his candy and Redbulls, Hidan sacrificed everyone at the party, Zetsu tied me up and tried to roast me on the stake…" He shivered, twitching his left eye, "… and I got totally DRUNK!"

Itachi coughed, rolling his almost-blind eyes in ignorance. "Not a good hangover, Kisame. Next time, ease on the amount of liquor you consume."

Kisame only paid attention to the Great White killing the other men on board a ship on Shark Week. "Yeah, yeah, like always. You gotta lighten up, Itachi. Besides, I think we'll have another celebration soon, since it's been a while. Besides, you like parties, right! God…!" Kisame turned to face him, "… you can't be totally emo all of the time! Beer, bed… girls…" He drooled mockingly as Itachi rolled his eyes again.

"Kisame, you haven't hit on a girl since blue balls. Besides, I attract all of the females."

The shark-man's face was covered in a shadow of embarrassment while Itachi hadn't even twitched the corner of his mouth in victory. He never shared his emotions with others, well, except for his therapist whom he killed last Monday. Hm, it wasn't a great loss, but he was the only one he could confess comfortably about his problems.

"You f***ing morons! We have a s***ty meeting to go to, now!"

…and Hidan was one of his problems.

Hidan came charging in, scythe at hand, huffing and puffing, narrowed eyes on the two partners. "You two assholes… guess what…"

Kisame smiled devilishly. "You're going to find a possible way to do suicide!"

Hidan growled, shining his tri-weapon in the shark-man's face. "Jashin has always liked sushi…"

Itachi sighed, knowing where this could end up. "What, Hidan?"

The immortal zealot was grinning as Kisame almost fainted by the looks of Hidan's murder weapon. "We have… JASHINMAS! Well… maybe, if we all decide on it."

Kisame got up, blinking in a daze, scratching his head. "You mean… Christmas, you know, with the elves and Santa and the reindeer, and the presents thing?"

"No you dumbass, JASHINMAS! Probably the best f***ing holiday in the world! And we'll have another party!"

Kisame perked his blue head up, looking around. "Party?" Then he faced Itachi with the puppy-dog face. "Party, Itachi-san!" Then he smirked in success, jumping off the sofa. "DUDE, LET'S F***ING PARTAY!"

Itachi pulled on his rambunctious friend's collar and pushed him to the couch. "Yes, Hidan-san, we'll be there, but please, do not swear in my presence. It bugs me."

Hidan grinned evilly, flipping him off. "Go f*** yourself, b****." He left running, secretly afraid of the tortures planned ahead from the master of torture, Mr. Sharingan himself.

Itachi closed his eyes, in another state of depression. He was surrounded by insane idiots.

. . .

Leader sighed as he came up onto the platform in front of all of the assembled members. Damn, he thought, crossing his fingers together, I hope this is a failure.

"Hope this is good, hmm, I had to skip completing my art sculpture," Deidara grumbled, flipping back his blonde ponytail in annoyance.

"Yeah, and Tobi was in the middle of watching Tobi's favorite show… Teletubbies!" yelled the masked member, squealing in joy. "Oh, Senpai, you have to watch it!"

Deidara scoffed. "And freaking blow myself up for watching the meanings of insanity, hmm? Tobi, that crap is for three year olds-"

Tobi jumped on his friend, his cheekbones lifting up his mask. "-but Teletubbies taught me how to sing my ABC's! Listen, A B C D EEEEE F GEEEE…!" Deidara covered his ears, cringing in hatred of his obnoxious partner.

Hidan turned to Kakuzu in support. "This will come through, I f***ing promise," he saluted, grinning pleasantly, "Jashin's birth will be celebrated by every d***, every b****, and all of those other unworthy assholes! And you won't stop this from happening!"

The five-hearted member turned the other way, avoiding his partner. "On my ass, and I still remember last year, and all of the crap I had to deal with because of it. My paycheck was cut in half the next day… IN HALF! There's no way that party is going to happen."

Hidan smirked. "Everyone had a good f***ing time, even you did, for an old man like you… remember… Delilah?"

Kakuzu's eyes shot open immediately. "That was a while ago Hidan-"

"-and she totally hit on you, she spiked you that drug Halloween night, you streaked across the hall, and she posted it all on YouTube! 14 million and still counting! Those b****es for our fangirls love a naked Akatsuki member!"

He couldn't take it anymore. Tentacles sprung from his back, wrapping around Hidan's neck, continuously going until his body was covered. "One more word about that girl and your head will be decapitated and played with for our weekly basketball game."

Hidan shuttered, he was reminded of the last time he'd pissed off Kakuzu, and that old bastard was going to feed him to Zetsu if he wanted to. The immortal nodded rapidly, his mouth covered, and Kakuzu sighed, letting him go. Hidan stirred, shaking his head and taking countless breaths. "F*** you, you old d***."

Itachi and Kisame had just sat down, after being annoyed by the immortal Jashinist to come to the meeting. The Uchiha had just called Dr. Phil for another appointment, mainly about Sasuke, and Kisame had folded both hands on his back, smirking. "Hopefully this works out, huh Itachi-san?"

Itachi sighed in the usual "Hm", but answered after that. "Who do you think we'll be inviting if this celebration happens? People from all over?"

Kisame laughed. "Hell, yes. Konaha, Kiri, Suna, and even…" he shuttered, "Oro's village. Maybe Sasuke will come, who knows." The shark-man stretched, lying comfortably on the seat. "And more fangirls, I'm sure. Heh, I remember one who just wanted to make out with me, what was her name… ah, yeah, Selena. Hot girl too… so there, Itachi, I have hit on a girl, even with blue balls."

Itachi wasn't paying attention after the name Sasuke came up. He'd finally be able to see his unfortunate baby brother from Konaha again, but only with Orochimaru along with him. He couldn't tell what scared him more, Orochimaru himself or the fact that Sasuke left for him. He twitched as the Leader stood tall and fakely superior on the podium.

Leader banged on the wooden podium, trying to get everyone's attention, but nothing worked. Tobi was singing off key to the alphabet song, Deidara was trying to cover his sensitive ears from hearing more crap from Tobi, Hidan was freely swearing while Kakuzu wasn't paying attention to anyone, counting his money nervously, wanting to see if anyone took any of his savings. Itachi was eyeing Leader, wanting him to get this stupid meeting over with, and Kisame was laughing at the sight of a defenseless Deidara and a tone-deaf Tobi. Zetsu was always in the corner, and Konan stood by the side, making a flirty face at Leader. They had been going out for four years, and Leader turned pink as everyone finally looked up at what was their boss.

"Oy! Look at this s***! Leader and Konan, sitting up in a f****ing tree…" Hidan yelled, laughing at the same time. When Leader found this out, his blushing face had begun to grow all over, turning his pierced face pink with love and embarrassment. Konan eyed Leader, and then blushed as he did.

"… K-I-S-S-I-N-G! Wow! Look at how Teletubbies can teach Tobi to spell!" Tobi shouted; both hands up in the air.

Leader had enough, pounding his fist onto the podium strongly. Every member kept shut, and all of them knew about his temper. Satisfied, he slouched into a comfortable position, Rinnegan eyes scanning every one of his subordinates.

"First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes another 'Pain' in a baby carriage," whispered Kisame to Itachi, who tried to crack a joke, but Itachi the unemotional Uchiha stared boringly ahead.

Leader groaned, having the annoyance to announce the new info. "Okay, okay, let's get this over with so that I can finally sleep… here we go, Hidan what's the thing called again?"

Hidan stood up, extremely offended by his boss' comment. "JASHINMAS, YOU PIECE OF SH-"

Leader had more important matters besides the name of the stupid holiday. "WHATEVER. I didn't have my caffeine today, so just, all of you, rest assured. We'll just do this whole holiday thing in voting. Sound good, or will I need to repeat myself… AGAIN?" He was yelling directly at a certain masked member, who looked like he was dozing in his seat, murmuring to himself. "WAKE UP, YOU BAKA, HMM!" Deidara shouted into his partner's ear, trying to get him into reality. Tobi stretched, hitting his Senpai in the face by air-punch, and came yawned again. As Kisame howled at the scene in the back row, Tobi had looked down at an unconscious Deidara, totally knocked out. Tobi twitched his head to the ground. "Senpai…? OMG, I killed Dei Senpai!"

Kakuzu couldn't take it anymore. He exploded in rage, grabbed Tobi by the legs with his tentacles and threw him in the corner repeatedly. He smiled as Tobi's pleads rang well within his ears. After a few minutes he racked Tobi and tied him up, placing him onto his chair without reason to move any part in his body. Tobi sighed, now he knew he shouldn't mess with Kakuzu-san.

"Can we get this thing over with?" Kakuzu asked exhaustingly, "I want an end immediately."

Leader sighed. "For once, Kakuzu, I agree with you… okay, who here wants the damned party?"

Hidan, Kisame, Konan, and White Zetsu raised their hands. Four.

Black Zetsu forced his other self's hand down to his side in defiance. "I think we should all remember the time from last year's Halloween."

"But what about the fun stuff we did? Sure, we were high on weed killer, but we got over it!" White Zetsu answered positively.

"No way in hell!"

"Yes, we're doing it!"

"SHUT THE F*** UP!" Hidan screamed into the open air, causing all members to cease in their places.

Leader blinked, interested and surprised that Hidan's compulsive swearing worked on cooling down his subordinates. "Okay, um… *cough* thanks Hidan *cough*. Hands of no party and we continue on our regular duties.

Sasori, Itachi, Kakuzu, Black Zetsu, and Leader raised their hands immediately. Five. Leader grinned.

"Oh, looks like no party," cooed Kakuzu mockingly to his partner. "What a pity we can't celebrate Jashin like you do, and waste the money in my pockets; well you know what, bud?" The five hearted immortal stood up like a rocket and waved his wallet in the air in greed. "NO PARTAY! OH POOR JASHIN, HIS NUMBER ONE FOLLOWER NOT CELEBRATING THE DAY HE WAS BORN! No Jashinmas! No Jashinmas, NO JASHINMAS! Yahoo!"

Tobi stuttered. "Um, you may be wrong about that, Kakuzu-san. Tobi haven't voted since you tied Tobi's hands together, and Dei is sleeping. Shh, everyone… he doesn't want to be disturbed!"

Leader twitched his eye. "And what do you say… Tobi?"

Tobi's cheekbones rose, making his mask rise as well. "TOBI WANTS TO CELEBRATE SANTA!"

Hidan cracked his knuckles fiercely. "If someone mentions that god damned word…" Tobi flinched, and screamed. "Senpai! Senpai!"

Amazingly, the whole group of Akatsuki criminals turned in shock to see Deidara rise up from the ground, fully conscious, and blinking, confused. "Wha…? Hmm."

Tobi tried to communicate with Deidara as he pushed himself off the ground. "Deidara Senpai, do you want the party?"

Deidara mused aloud, making various grunting noises like yeah, or hmm. Then he smiled. "I remember the fireworks that night; I made them with my art, after all, hmm." He flipped his blonde ponytail to his shoulders.

Sasori muttered something in the lines of: "Art my ass", but the vain Deidara pressed on, making the intensity and nervousness in the room frightening. "'I guess, yeah. I had a bang."

Kisame, Black Zetsu, Konan, Tobi, and Hidan all sang glory to the hallelujah and raised their hands in the air in celebration while Sasori, Itachi, White Zetsu, Kakuzu, and Leader needed a rest, dropping their heads in saddening loss. Deidara high-fived Tobi, and Hidan had the chance of a lifetime. When his partner was not paying attention, the immortal Jashinist grabbed his wallet from his hand and ran off with it, screaming: "PARTAY AT THE AKATSUKI HIDEOUT! IN YOUR FACES: JASHINMAS WILL BE THE S***!"

While Kakuzu was in hot pursuit, Leader slammed his head onto the podium in defeat. It was all settled. There will be Jashinmas.

Oh bloody me, I hope it's not like last time…

Me: Again, review. Or YAMATO will come to your house and terrify you to death.

Yamato: What am I doing here? Isn't this mostly an Akatsuki fanfic?

Me: Well, if you scare Naruto with those soulless eyes of hate, then everyone will be scared enough they'll have to write a review *thunder and lightning in the background*

Yamato: You're an evil child.

Me: And for me, it's eleven at night, and I'm writing this. Now please, just do it. Or maybe Sai can come over…

Yamato: Fine, fine. *does scary, shadowed, big blacked eyed stare to creep out people* Review. Or fright will haunt you.

Me: Haha! Fright, like when people first see your face! *high-fives Sai* How about some ice for that BURN?

Yamato: God help me...

Sai: Just keep your emotions in, sensei, please. Don't look upset.

Me: And this is coming from the emo gay man. Nice.

Sai: *totally embarrassed on hitting on Naruto* You're a horrible b****, aren't you?

Me: Heh, you need better than that, emo! I've been told.

Sai: *looks down in sadness* Aw, that was a good one, too.