a/n WARNING: THIS CHAPTER MAY CAUSE CRAVINGS FOR KFC OR POPEYES. DO NOT SAY YOU WERNE'T FOREWARNED.

There is now an outtake posted. From when Bedward was en route to Alaska. On the plane. Gettin' jiggy wit it. It's simply entitled "Flying." Go look. There's some steam.

CHAPTER 12—JUST A LITTLE BIT LONGER

The house was fairly quiet. Mike wandered around, not sure what to do with himself, and explored while Tanya was off, spending much needed time with her family. He found his way into a library full of books in a myriad of languages. There were lots that were in Russian and Spanish. He'd met the rest of her family, and assumed that the Spanish books belonged to Carmen or Eleazer.

Eleazer, who always gave him an odd, almost amused, look. Strange guy.

He found an old photo album and flipped through.

That was what he was doing when the door to the library opened.

Bella peered around the door frame. "Hey, friend," she said cheerfully, waving. "Wacha got?"

Bella had kept him grounded for the last three days. His sudden thrust into the world of the supernatural was one she could relate to, having gone through it several years before. She understood his current state of mind, and gave him someone to talk to.

Now, he smiled at her. She was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt that he was sure were designer brands, and she nearly glowed in the twilight of the late evening. Even as beautiful as she was now, though, she paled in comparison to Tanya. It was like she held no more desire for him, in any way other than friendship.

He held up the photo album. "You seen this?"

She was next to him on the couch a split second later, and he blinked. "It's still weird you don't fall down," he said, shaking his head.

She laughed, the sound higher than before. "I know. I'm still not used to it." She peered at the album in his lap and burst into laughter. "Oh, my God," she giggled. "What is he wearing?"

"I have no idea," Mike said, shaking his head. "Says 1942, Argentina. Wonder what they were up to?"

"Draft dodging." The only other person in the house, Edward, had stopped in the door. "And helping out a few local gouchos. Killed some time."

"Draft dodging?" Mike frowned, confused.

"World War II," he said. "Argentina stayed neutral for most of the war, until the end. It was the perfect hideout. And of course, later on, quite a few Nazis found out the same thing. Carlisle couldn't stand it anymore, and we decided it was safe to go home."

"Wow." Bella blinked, seeming as dumfounded as Mike.

What the hell do you say to that?

Edward smiled and tapped his head before turning to his wife. "I got what you asked for." The smile was suddenly a little strained. "I stole it from a hospital. It's medical." He threw her a rolled up paper bag.

Bella grinned. "Thanks, baby." She blew him a kiss, and he stalked off into the hall. When he was gone, she stuck her tongue out.

"He'll still know," Mike said, mimicking Edward's earlier motion and tapping his head.

"Nope." Bella grinned. She tapped her own head. "I have a shield."

"Yeah, for yourself. Not me." Her smile turned coy. "Right?"

"For me, yes," she said, a full smirk crossing her face. She looked like a glorious version of the Cheshire cat. "And for anyone else in my immediate vicinity I chose to shield, as well."

Mike blinked. Seriously, like he wasn't mind blown enough already. He told her as much, and she laughed delightedly. "That's the idea." She held out the bag. "Alice and Jasper will be here later, and he's funny when he gets buzzed from other people's high."

"Huh?" He unrolled the bag, then shoved it in his face to inhale. His eyes rolled back in his head. "Oh, you're a good friend. A real good friend."

"I figured you could use it."

"And he said this was medical?" He laughed. "I'm so happy right now."

Two hours later, Mike was lying with his feet over the back of the couch, his head dangling while he watched Office Space. Peter Gibbons had just knocked down the wall to his cubical and was kicking back. Mike laughed hysterically while the Geto Boys sang their song about gangsters. He heard a door open, and the smell of fried chicken filled his nostrils as Jasper Hale rounded the corner, his eyes wide.

"Alice said to bring him his dinner," he said.

Mike had always been terrified of the silent Cullen, stoic and living in the background. Cool, but with that hint of something unsettling just below the surface.

So when Jasper Hale burst into hysterical giggles and handed off the chicken to Bella so that he could clutch his sides, Mike found it really funny.

Jasper seemed to have something to say, but he seemed unable to speak clearly.

"Dude," he choked out. "You're ripped!"

Mike's laughter doubled and he rolled off the couch, over onto his back on the floor. It was strange, but delightful. It felt like the more Jasper laughed, the funnier the whole thing got.

Then Bella started to get the giggles. Trying to contain herself, she kicked her brother in the back. "Stop it," she managed. "You're making it worse!"

"It's your fault!" Jasper looked like he would have been crying. Bella had explained to him that vampires did not cry tears. "You got him stoned!" He burst into the worst fit of giggles yet before managing to spit out, "But it's funny as shit!"

Mike managed to calm down enough to realize that the fried chicken smelled amazing. Bella was making an extremely disgusted face at the smell. She'd explained the food thing to him. Weird, to think that this wouldn't taste good after…

"Oh, I'm sorry," Jasper said. "I forgot you really hate the smell of fried chicken."

She handed the bucket off to him so that he could hand it down to Mike. "It reminds me of vomit."

"Fried chicken?" Mike took a big bite of a drum stick. Jasper was calming down, and was just occasionally shuddering now. "It smells amazing."

She shook her head, her nose scrunching. "It was the first thing I puked up when I was pregnant."

Mike promptly choked on his chicken. This was news. "You were pregnant?"

A huge grin crossed her face. She went from disgusted to glowing in an instant. "Yes, and I have a beautiful daughter." Her eyes twinkled. "I think you met my 'niece'?" She used air quotes.

Mike thought for a moment, and the conclusion shocked him. "The girl that was at the house when I picked Tanya up for our first date." It wasn't a question.

Bella's grin widened, and Jasper was smiling, too. Shocker. Dude was a blob of happy. "Yes," she said. "She's four years old. Thinks she knows everything."

Mike blinked. "Confused," he stated.

"She's half vampire," Jasper explained. "She's Edward's. Bella had her as a human."

"She broke several of my ribs, made me black and blue all over, fractured my pelvis, and broke my spine in the end, but she's amazing." Bella was still smiling. "There's another album up there with a million baby pictures Alice and Rose took. They got to play dress up with her every day. But I got to tuck her in every night." She was smug.

"She broke your spine?"

Bella cocked an eyebrow. "It was a violent birth."

"Sounds like." Mike thought back for a moment. "She looks a lot like Edward."

"My eyes, though," Bella said. "And she's got my dad's curly hair. It's so cute!"

Mike frowned down at his chicken. "Tanya said something once about not being able to have kids. Is she the only one?"

Bella shook her. "Vampire women can't bear children," she explained, and it sounded like this was a speech she was used to giving. It seemed rehearsed. "Their bodies don't allow for the necessary change. But men don't have to change anything, human or vampire. So if you have a changing human female and a male vampire that doesn't need to change, you can wind up with a little half and half baby."

Mike took another bite of his chicken and nodded, like he heard this shit every day. Then he was curious. "So, since she's four, I guess she ages fast." Then he thought of where the question might end up and shut his mouth.

Again, it seemed rehearsed. She smiled gently. "She'll stop aging when she's around seven."

"How do you know?"

"There's a few others out there." She frowned. "They're a little less fortunate than she is."

"But they've all stopped aging?"

Jasper laughed. "Nahuel's almost as old as I am, and he still looks the same."

"How old are you?"

"One hundred and fifty seven." He grinned.

"Huh." Mike took another bite of chicken.

Jasper sighed as he watched Mike eat. "I used to love fried chicken," he sighed. "Anything fried. Fried okra was good, too."

"Ew," Bella said. "Okra is disgusting."

"Oh, darlin,'" he said, laughing, "it was my mother's specialty."

Mike frowned, polishing off his third piece of chicken. "Where'd she say you're from?"

"Texas." He grinned and puffed up his chest a little. "Southern boy, born and raised."

"Fighting for the losing team," Bella said, grinning, "and still in denial."

Jasper scowled. "It was, and still is, a pride issue."

"And it was, and still is, a pride issue up here." She grinned. "Proud we kicked your asses."

Jasper's face looked a little hurt. "You're mean," he said.

"Big scary soldier boy," Bella giggled. "You look so—"

Jasper was off the floor and had his little sister in a headlock with his fist rubbing her head. She squealed and tried to kick him off, but he really had a good hold on her. It was pretty impressive.

"Stop it!" she squealed, squirming and trying to get away from him. She kicked as best she could, and somehow got her foot loose. Mike watched, knowing where this could well lead, as Jasper tried to get her foot back. He missed grabbing it by a centimeter, and it swung back and connected with a crack against his crotch.

Mike half expected the vampire to show no pain.

Instead, he proved that men were men and let go, crumpling into a ball on the couch. "Bitch," he gasped, holding himself and rolling back and forth. "Oh, Jesus! Fuck, that hurt!"

For some reason, this was funny, too.

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Tanya didn't feel much better after hunting. She'd hunted yesterday, and the day before. She felt full and satisfied, but her stomach was still churning. Mike had told her last night he needed one more day. He just wanted to sleep on it one more night. She'd left this morning to give him time to think, leaving him with his confidant.

It made her jealous that Bella could be something for him that she couldn't be. She understood—Edward had explained everything to her. It wasn't a romantic connection. She just related to him in a way none of the rest of them could. None of them had been given a chance to be weaned into the vampire lifestyle except Bella, which gave her an advantage.

And she now knew something that Mike didn't.

Upon meeting Tanya's new beau, the rest of the family had been quite curious to see what it was about him that lured her to him. They noted his humor, his easygoing manner. Carmen had compared them to Emmett and Rosalie—the beauty queen with her carefree, honest partner who considered her looks an added bonus. Kate had agreed, but added that there was something very alluring about him. And Eleazer, amused, had simply commented that he was a very charming man, in the same way that Tanya was a very charming woman. He would hold off on calling him a succubus until he was changed, but it was defiantly on Eleazar's mind.

"It would make sense, really," he'd said. "No one's tamed you thus far. Maybe that's what you were waiting for."

So now, she was running back to the house where she'd left him alone with Bella and Edward while they waited for Alice and Jasper to get in from their two days of hunting.

When she stepped in the front door, she followed the sounds of laughter from upstairs.

They were in the library. It appeared that they had been watching a movie, but it was abandoned. Mike had polished off half a bucket of fried chicken and was rolling on the floor, clutching his sides. Edward was shaking his head, grinning, while Bella apologized over and over for something. Alice, who had entered behind Tanya, perched herself on the edge of the couch next to her husband.

"That's what happens when you don't hold on tight," she said, shaking her head. "Take notes, Mike. You may be stronger, but you'll still have a few vulnerable spots."

Mike's laughter doubled, tears running down his face.

Tanya frowned. "What happened?"

Mike spluttered, trying to speak. "She…" He dissolved into snorts again. "She got him right in the nuts!" His laughter took over again.

Behind the couch, Edward chuckled at Tanya's perplexed confusion. Then she realized what was going on.

"I can't believe you actually went and stole marijuana of all things," Tanya said, rolling her eyes. "You could have just bought some."

"This was easier than finding a drug dealer," he said wryly. "And less frustrating."

Mike had tears running down his face now. He had lost all ability to speak, and he slowly climbed to his feet, still hysterical. He made his way over to her, wrapping his arms around her and pulling his shaking body to hers. He stopped laughing enough to give her a kiss, and she smiled up at him, taking his hand in hers and leading him out of the room.

He was still chuckling when he led her into her vast bedroom, closing the door behind them. She wrapped her arms around his waist, missing the feel of him pressed against her. He chuckled when she nuzzled into his chest, inhaling.

"Miss me?" he asked.

"Mmmmm." She inhaled again. "Yes. Twelve hours is too long."

"I agree." His blue eyes sparkled as he grasped her hips, steering her back toward the bed. "I missed you more than I should for twelve hours."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." His lips found her ear and tortured it with kisses and nips. Tanya could feel her eyes rolling in her head. He thrust his hips against hers, and she could feel just how much he'd missed her.

Maybe… Maybe it was enough. Maybe he'd decide…

She didn't realize that, while he was kissing her, she'd become really and truly distracted. He pulled back, frowning. "Baby?"

"Sorry." She'd never had this problem, and she smiled at him, twining her fingers in his hair. "I was thinking."

"About what?" He looked a little concerned.

Why was this suddenly so difficult? Because he could say no. Your psycho family might have scared him off. The words popped out without her being able to stop them. "If you don't like my family, we can move." Mike burst out laughing. He rolled onto his back, the hysterics from earlier returning. She rolled her eyes. "You're so stoned."

He finally calmed enough to say, "Do you know why I wanted to get stoned today?" She shrugged. "Bella mentioned something to me the other day—I'll never be able to get inebriated again. So I'm going to spend the next few days stoned, then I'm going to get really drunk, then both, then maybe do something really crazy."

She blinked. "Why?"

His face softened, and he took hers in his hands. "Because I want to enjoy it as long as I can, which probably won't be much longer." He brushed her cheeks with his thumbs. "I'd like to stay, if you still want me to."

Stay. He wanted to stay with her. "What did you have to think so hard about?"

Mike sighed heavily and sat up. "Forever's a long time," he said quietly. "I was afraid you'd get tired of me. I'm not as exciting as you."

Tanya laughed. "Darling, you're the best thing in my life. And I could never get tired of you."

Mike nodded. "I know," he said, and he didn't sound smug or appeasing. "I talked to Bella about that, too. She said vampires don't change often or easily, and that includes changing their minds." He smiled. "And when I say I talked to her about it, I mean she pried it out of me like a vulture."

Tanya burst out laughing. "I love her more every day," she said, smiling. "She's such a darling."

"She's a good friend," he said. "That was the other thing. It's not like I'm going into this blind. She told me everything. Including," he said, and now he looked confused, "to avoid morphine, because it won't work. What's that about?"

In the library, Tanya heard Edward hiss, and she could see Bella's guilty face in her mind's eye. Oh, dear.

"When she was turned, Edward had so much morphine in her system he thought it would get rid of the pain." She grimaced. "It must not have worked."

"And I get to find out now," she heard Edward mutter.

"I didn't think we'd ever need to turn somebody again," Bella shot back. "You've kept things from me before."

"Not things like this!" Their voices were rising, and Mike could hear them now, too. He looked curious. "Were you in pain?"

"I would have been anyway!" Bella yelled.

"Oh, God," Tanya muttered.

"What?"

She smiled sardonically. "They're passionate lovers," she said. "And now that they're equals, they're very passionate fighters. Both of them, tempers like dynamite."

"We do not fight all the time!" Bella yelled.

Tanya rolled her eyes. "I'm not saying that," she said, and she grinned. "Just that it's a little explosive. You should see their bedroom furniture after their make-up sex. It's demolished."

The front door slammed, then, after a few seconds, it slammed again. There was a chuckle. Jasper.

Mike looked at the door. "Did they leave?"

"Probably." She laughed. "They like to fight outside. I've had to hear it before. It'll start turning sexual in about five minutes, and you might see some of the trees move."

Mike was quiet for a second. Then…

He was trying not to laugh again.

"It's not funny," he said, trying to hold it back.

"But it's so true," Jasper called, then burst out laughing, taking a still-stoned Mike down with him.

a/n Yay! Love! Leave me some!

To those of you in the Midwest: Are you done with the wind yet? 'Cause this shit's ridiculous. Hope everyone's okay, no tornadoes hit your house and you can still read this because your internet hasn't been knocked out.

Go read "Flying." And review. Because I have over three hundred hits and no reviews. Do it. Goddammit, go! Why are you still reading this? Haven't you even left me a review yet? Grilled cheesus... *shakes head in mock disappointment*