Disclaimer: I own nothing. These wonderful, beautiful characters belong to Hoshino Kastura. Sorry for any OOCness.

Chapter two

Five days later…

"Kanda!" Lavi burst into the Dining Hall, stopping all conversation. There was a panicked look on his face as he looked around wildly for the Japanese samurai. "The rabbit! It just spoke!"

Kanda, who had been trying to eat his soba noodles in peace and tranquility (yeah right) promptly ignored the hysterical soon to be Bookman.

"W-what?" Miranda Lotto spoke up timidly, eyes wide. "Rabbits can talk?"

Lavi nodded his head so hard it looked as if it would fall off. "I was reading a book when I heard it! It said I looked delicious!" Lavi's eyes were wide in horror, and Miranda's quickly followed.

"Uh, Lavi," Allen said almost hidden behind the mountain of empty plates and bowls. "Rabbits can't talk."

"Well this one did!" Lavi said waving his hands around in the air. The rabbits had grown incredibly fast, and fat for that matter over the span of five days (leave it to Komui). They had had to be moved outside in the courtyard and corralled into a pen that the Science Division fixed up because they wouldn't stop trying to eat things and people. The 'poor adorable little things' as Lenalee called them were long gone, replaced by vicious lagomorphs with attitudes that could rival Kanda's. The pen had an electrified fence around it because some of the bigger rabbits (more like massive rabbits, they were at least fifteen feet tall) had tried several times to escape and almost succeeded sending several Black Order members to the med bay. Lenalee, needless to say had been quite upset, as well as Timothy (he had gotten a kick out of those rabbits) but that quickly turned to anger after the rabbits had tried to eat them. Lavi had been most insistent about keeping his 'Yuu-chan' with him despite everyone's annoyance with having a thirteen foot rabbit bouncing around inside. Thankfully 'Yuu-chan' was much more docile and calm than his brothers and sisters.

"Lavi, maybe hanging around that bunny is bad for your mental health," Back said, who had been visiting for the day. "Where is it anyways?"

"I left it in my room with Bookman, he's watching over it."

"Che, the Usagi never had any to begin with," Kanda said, setting his chopsticks down.

Lavi glared at them, and insisted, "I'm not making this up guys! Photographic memory, remember?"

"Lavi," Lenalee said, "Rabbits don't talk."

"What about rabbits that were a result from Chief Komui's crazy experiments?" Lavi grinned triumphantly at the uncertain looks on their faces.

"Even so…" Allen still looked doubtful.

"Seriously guys, the rabbit spoke!"

"You should believe the inferior earthling. Now bow before us!" Everyone's faces turned to one of pure shock as they saw the rabbit 'Yuu-chan' who was most definitely talking, standing in the entrance to the Dining Hall. Two other rabbits flanked its sides, both at least four feet taller than their leader.

"The other pestilences have been dealt with. Now you shall feel the wrath of my kin and I!" Yuu-chan the rabbit snarled at the people in the room.

Immediately the exorcists jumped into action, activating their Innocence and defeating the giant bunnies! Well, that's what they wished had happened. The reality that took place was the complete opposite. Miranda fainted right before the wall to the Dining Hall blasted open and a swarm of giant rabbits stampeded in. Kanda wasted no time in moving forward to slice several open when a rabbit threw a smoke bomb in the middle of the room (where or how the rabbit came into possession with a smoke bomb was a mystery).

"It's gas!" Allen shouted between coughs. "Don't breath it in!" Not five seconds afterwards he passed out, followed shortly by Back, Reever, the staff, and Lavi. Lenalee and Kanda had been further away from the bomb, so they weren't effect as much. The rabbits wasted no time picking up the fallen exorcists and Black Order members.

"Take the sacrifices to the temple!" Yuu-chan The King of the Death Bunnies bellowed. The rabbits obeyed immediately and quick as a flash left the way they came.

"Kanda!" Lenalee called out to the very ticked off samurai covering her mouth. "We can't let them escape!"

"Degenerate being! I command you to dispatch yourself from this location and never incur problems upon us again!" Yuu-chan The King of the Death Bunnies boomed. He stomped his foot down, sending a shock wave strong enough to send the two exorcists flying, where they slammed into the back wall. Blood trickled down from where Kanda hit his head, and he was unconscious not long after Lenalee was. The Rabbit King smiled evilly (can rabbits even do that?) then joined his fellow rabbits.

A little while later…

Out of all the possible ways to die (and there are a lot of ways) this was the least one that fifteen year old Allen Walker expected. Tied down to an alter in some desolate temple with Lavi, Reever, Bak and others from the Black Order to be offered up to a (fake) god. By pink, giant, talking bunnies with green eyes and fangs that resembled a Saber tooth Tiger.

"I am going to kill Komui even if I have to crawl back from the dead to do it!" Reever Wenham growled with vengeance. "And then I'll bring him back from the dead and kill him again!"

"I'd be more than happy to help." Bak Cheng said darkly.

"Silence insufferable pestilences!" The (Allen surmised) King of the Death Bunnies (as they had been dubbed) snarled. "You shall soon speak no more."

"Isn't that a comforting thought," Lavi muttered. "I can't believe I ever thought you guys were cute."

"I can't believe this!" Allen groaned.

"That you're going to die?" Lavi asked, craning his head to see Allen.

"No, Kanda was right after all."

"Yeah…this sucks. Allen, can you activate your innocence? I can't reach my hammer."

Allen shook his head. "I'm pretty sure they stole some sedatives from the Science Division. I can't move at all right now. It should wear off soon, but until then, we're stuck."

"Brilliant." Lavi muttered sarcastically. "Now that I think about, I shouldn't be so surprised this happened. I mean, I name a bunny after Yuu that turns evil, frees a bunch of demon rabbits, then kidnaps us and plans to offer us up to some sort of fake bunny god? Figures."

"Now earthlings," Yuu-chan the King of the Death Bunnies turned to the captives. "You shall be liberated from this world."

The demon rabbits advanced on their sacrifices and the amount of murder plans for Komui started to reach close to a thousand.

"Accept the offerings!" A rabbit called out. Allen was sure those would be the last words he was ever going to hear (how nice) when Lenalee came flying through the air, her foot smashing into the rabbit, sending it flying.

"Don't you ever hurt my friends," Lenalee glared at the rabbit. She quickly ran over the captured exorcist, freeing them and the others.

"Insufferable incompetent creature!" A rabbit cried. They quickly recovered from the shock of having their fellow rabbit get KO'd by a girl and started to charge at her.

There was then a loud crash as a giant white robot of a thing smashed through the temple and landed between the oncoming rabbits and the prisoners.

"Komlin!" Komui cried who had come to help with the rescue (as well as Kanda and others from the Black Order, mostly the science division). "Attack the rabbits!" The robot wasted no time in fulfilling the order, and soon there was a huge battle between giant pink rabbits and members of the Black Order. The exorcists were attacking with a vengeance, not sparing a single rabbit.

"I can't believe you, Yuu-chan!" Lavi glared at his evil rabbit. "You broke my heart!" With that he swung his hammer at his ex-rabbit. A game of whack-a-mole took place for a few minutes until Lavi finally managed to smash the evil rabbit. There was a small flash of light and when it disappeared in place of the evil king of the Death Bunnies was a dust bunny. Lavi mentally face palmed. Leave it to Komui.

Flashes of light filled the deserted temple as more and more rabbits were returned to their original being. Soon they were all gone, the only evidence of there ever being evil demon rabbits were the dust bunnies floating around.

"Well, looks like that's taken care of." Komui said looking satisfied with himself.

"Komui…" The members of the Science Division started to stalk towards their chief, looks of murder and promising extreme pain written across their faces. Komui promptly turned, hopped onto Komlin and made a daring escape.

"Let's bury him under six feet of ruble!" A cry of consent was given and they rushed out after their escaping chief.

"Well," Allen sighed. The sedative had worn off not long after Lenalee had come to their rescue, so he was now able to move again. "I'm starving."

"Me too," Lavi yawned and slung an arm around Allen and Kanda. "Come on, let's go."

"Get your arm off me before I slice it off."

"Awww, Yuu. Don't be so mean!"

The exorcists left the dust bunny filled temple behind and started making their way home. Lenalee and Allen were chatting amiably while Lavi was running around with a huge grin on his face, trying to get away from Kanda who had drawn his Mugen and was spewing insults at him. They were all quite glad the whole ordeal was over.

The next day…

What the ! $%^&*^ in the ! $#%% of !#$# %$#?

Reever and the rest of the Science Division members stared in shock and infuriation at their department. Or rather what was in their department.

Penguins. An entire rookery of them waddling everywhere. And they were bright orange.

"KOMUUIIII!"

The End

Epilogue (Somewhere in Europe….)

"Did you hear something?" Noise Marie asked, tilting his head.

"No," Daisya Barry looked over at his companion. "Why?"

"I could have sworn I just heard someone yell 'Komui.'"

Daisya shrugged his shoulders and went back to eating his lunch. "Weird."

The Final End

Well, hope you enjoyed it :D Please leave a review and tell me what you think (or if I made any errors). And in case it wasn't clear, yes Komui did create those evil rabbits from dust bunnies. Also there are most likely quite a few potholes, so for that use your imagination ;) Special thanks to Higara and MsAliciaSimoneMichaelis for reviewing and Bleauluffy and MsAliciaSimoneMichaelis for favorite-ing :) (And everyone else who viewed this story).