Monk's (later that afternoon)
"Kramer, that's ridiculous! You can't really expect me to believe that you're running a travel agency out of your apartment!"
"Why not, George? It's brilliant! I mean- Oh, hey Elaine."
Elaine walked into the restaurant and spotted George and Kramer, painfully aware that a familiar body was missing from their favorite booth.
God, what have I done?
She put on her best fake smile and went to greet her friends.
"Elaine, do you believe this?" George asked before she could even open her mouth. "Kramer here is running a travel agency out of his apartment!"
Normally she would have come up with a smart-mouthed remark.
But not today.
"It could happen." She said.
"Elaine, are you kidding me? He's not qualified to run a travel agency!" George exclaimed, almost yelling the words.
Ignoring her friend, Elaine slid into the booth and picked up a menu. "So what are you guys having?"
"I think I'll have the soup." George said.
Kramer skimmed the contents of the menu. "I think I'm gonna try the tuna. Jerry's always raving about it."
At the mention of her former boyfriend, Elaine's heart did a tiny little flip. She pulled the menu closer to her face, trying to hide the sadness in her face.
"I think I'll have the Big Salad." She said, not even reading the menu.
George scoffed. "Again with the Big Salad? I can't believe you would order that after the hell I went through trying to give it to you in the first place!"
"Well I LIKE the Big Salad, okay?" She snapped.
George threw up his hands in irritation. "Sure, fine. Rub it in my face, why don't you? The least you could have done was said 'thank you', but noooo..."
"George! You're making a scene!" Kramer said. "They'll put you away for sure! And I don't mean in jail."
"Oh, I'm making a scene?" George asked, pointing to Elaine. "I'll tell you who makes a scene around here. Those two!"
Elaine blinked in surprise. "What?"
"That's right. You and Jerry with your shameless kissing and hand-holding. I mean, really Elaine... right in front of everyone?"
"Buddy, you're just jealous." Kramer said with a click of his tongue.
"Jealous? You're nuts! You think I want to sit here and watch Elaine and Jerry kiss each other while I'm trying to eat? I tell ya... Hey, where is Jerry anyway?" George
asked. "He's usually here by now."
Elaine looked away, the familiar heaviness settling in her chest. She stared out the window, willing him to arrive.
"Something wrong?" George asked.
She tried to smile but it was impossible.
"Elaine?"
Her eyes filled with tears, causing George and Kramer to exchange worried glances.
"Elaine? What's wrong?" George said again.
A tear streaked down her cheek, and she sniffled. "I should go." She said grabbing her coat and purse.
"But we haven't ordered yet!" Kramer said.
George's irritated expression turned to seriousness. "Hey, Elaine, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-."
"I-it's fine. Bye George. Bye Kramer."
"Wait!" George called to her as she walked out the door.
When she didn't stop, he and Kramer slid out of the booth and ran to catch up with her.
"Hey!" The waitress yelled. "You can't just walk out! I got a living to earn, you know!"
"Watch us!" Kramer yelled back.
Breathless, George and Kramer rounded the corner, stopping mere inches from her.
"Elaine!"
Reluctantly, she turned around, suddenly embarrassed by her tear-streaked face. Now she was really pathetic; crying in front of her friends.
But instead of being disgusted, George looked...
Concerned.
"You're crying."
She tried to act normal, and brushed the tears from her cheeks.
"Gee George, whatever gave you that idea?"
To her surprise, he put his hand on her shoulder. "Well, your hurt expression for one. Believe me, I've made plenty of women cry, and-."
"Shut up, George!" She yelled, shoving him away. "I need to get home."
When she started to walk away, George ran after her.
"Elaine, wait!"
She rolled her eyes and turned around. "Leave me alone, George!"
"What's wrong? Why are you so upset?"
"I-I..."
"Come on, you can tell me." George said. "Is it bad?"
Elaine nodded tearfully.
"Believe me, I've heard it all." George said. "I've pretty much screwed up my life so many times that nothing you could say would shock me."
"Um... Jerry and I broke up." She said, the words rushing from her mouth.
George stared at her in shock.
"What? Well when did this happen?"
"A couple of hours ago."
"A couple of hours ago? But-but when you were here earlier, you and Jerry were all over each other! Like animals, I tell ya! What happened?"
Elaine sniffled "It was my fault, George. I broke up with him."
"But why?"
Elaine blinked, causing another tear to escape. "I-I should go."
"Hang on a minute." George said, gently touching her forearm. "What happened?"
When she didn't answer he touched her back. "Come on, let's go back inside."
"No, I really-."
"Please?" He asked, truly meaning it.
She sighed. "Okay."
"Is everything okay?" Kramer asked when George and Elaine reached the front door.
"Let's... go sit over there." George said, pointing to the corner booth.
Confused, Kramer followed them.
They slid into the booth, George and Kramer across from Elaine.
"What happened?" Kramer asked.
George scoffed. "I'll tell you what happened! She and Jerry broke up!"
Elaine's eyes widened. "Ge-orge!"
At this news, Kramer jerked back in surprise.
"You're kidding! Why?"
"That's what I'd like to know." George said.
"We're just... not right for each other." Elaine said softly.
Kramer's eyes widened. "Not right for each other? That's nuts! Don't you know that Jerry's been in love with you for years? How could you say you aren't right for each
other?"
Elaine smiled at the unintentional compliment.
"Well, it seems that some people disapprove." She said, amazed at how relieved she was to get the words out.
"What people?" Kramer yelled, causing heads to turn.
When Elaine realized that almost every eye in the restaurant was on their table, her face began to burn.
"Come on, tell us!" Kramer urged.
"Well, I got into an argument with Sue Ellen after Pilates class and she started tearing into me about us getting arrested and how no one else would want me except
for a-and I quote-pathetic lowlife like Jerry."
"That bitch!" George yelled.
"George!" Elaine said, looking nervously around the restaurant.
"The nerve of her! Saying that to you after she goes and marries that loser, David Puddy. If anyone is a lowlife, it's me. Not Jerry Seinfeld!" George fumed.
Elaine tried to hide her smile.
"Don't worry about her." Kramer said. "If anyone's a lowlife, it's her. Not you, Buddy." He added, smiling at George.
George grinned. "Thanks, Kramer."
"Well she's not the only one who doesn't like Jerry." Elaine said.
"What are you talking about?" Kramer asked.
"My father."
"But your father doesn't like anyone." George said. "Mark my words, he hates my guts!"
"I thought you said that he liked Jerry." Kramer said.
"That's what I thought." Elaine said.
"So, what happened?"
"I called him after Sue Ellen... well... To talk, you know? When I told him I wanted to talk about Jerry, he went ballistic, Kramer! Made me promise to stay away from
him! Can you believe that?"
"The nerve!" Kramer said, his voice rising hysterically.
Elaine wanted to laugh, but started to cry instead.
"Damn... not again..."
"That's why you broke up with Jerry? Because of Sue Ellen and your father?"
"Well yeah, George! What else was I supposed to do? I mean, I didn't want to... God, I really didn't want to, but I ... have you seen him?"
"Not recent-."
"Who Jerry? Yeah, I saw him just a little while ago." Kramer interrupted, ignoring George's glare.
Elaine raised her head, immediately filled with hope. "R-really? I-is he okay?"
"Well, he looked pretty heartbroken now that I think about it." Kramer said.
When Elaine gasped and put her hand over her mouth, George punched Kramer in the arm.
"OW! What was that for?" Kramer whimpered.
"Don't upset her any more than she already is!" George sneered.
"I-it's okay, Kramer." Elaine said. "You couldn't possibly..."
To her horror she began to cry again.
"I-I'm sorry. This is so lame, crying all the time but I just can't seem to stop! It's my own fault for hurting Jerry. I deserve it. I-I didn't even tell him I loved him before I-."
George smiled sympathetically. Then he reached across the table and took her hand, ignoring Elaine and
Kramer's shocked expressions.
"Look... Elaine... It's not your fault! Jerry's a good guy! I've known him for almost my entire life. We survived junior high and high school together. If that's not
dedication, I don't know what is! And forget about Sue Ellen Mischke! She's a worthless, no-good-."
Elaine smiled. "George-."
"Well, damn it Elaine! Look what she's done to you! I've never seen you this upset before!" George said.
Elaine reached over and grabbed a paper napkin from the napkin holder, blotting her face with it. "I know... I'm pathetic."
"Will you stop saying that?" Kramer said. "If anyone's pathetic, it's-."
He stopped suddenly, engrossed by something in the window.
"Kramer, what is it?" George asked, trying to follow Kramer's gaze.
"Oh..."
"What's wrong?" Elaine asked.
She followed George's pointing finger, turning her head to look out the window.
Jerry...