I would like to give my appreciative thanks to swinglifeawayxx, pariswindspeed, nileylovva, talks too much, .shakeitlikecyrus, silentheartc, nileyfan1, mileycyruscan'tbetamed, and anonymous for your extremely helpful feedback. This one goes out to all who reviewed and shared their thoughts! Here's a nice long prologue, to set up the story. Hopefully it'll get people interested and slightly intrigued ;) feel the adorableness of Miam!

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, only the fictional journey I have set before them. I do not claim anything of "Eat Pray Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert or the song lyrics "Wait" by Alexi Murdoch.

Towards the Sun
Prologue

There are some very complicated ideas running through this eighteen year old's brain. These thoughts keep building up into a reigning mountain of contradicting truths; so high that she's nearly hit rock bottom. It'd be smart to share them with somebody but she wouldn't dare to even attempt it until she herself has gotten a good grasp on the complications that keep her confused at night and sad during the day. Once this all clears, she assures herself, 'I will be okay.' 'I will get back to what I have, and not what I want.'

Oh but she needs what she wants.

Every person- everybody, everywhere- has a vision of a perfect LIFE tucked under their sleeves. It clings onto their eyelids, their imaginations, and their ears; they can see it, feel like, hear it- but some can't believe in it. They think it's impossible, it's unrealistic, it's not practical. They make themselves believe that it is all these frustrating words, yet it is all that they want. Up in the clouds where dreams hang high, there are visions of fame, fortune, friends, family, fulfillment. There are visions of life as a star, a beautiful home, a thousand friends. Miley's got all that. But now that she has it, she wants less of the grand things, and more of the quant things. Like an undisturbed day with her boyfriend. A moment to breathe. Travel without reason, only ambitions. Living without ambitions, only with reason. Her definition of a perfect life has changed.

So she's walking out the door now into the bright sticky air. Her big black boots rile at the dirt that's collected in small piles around the driveway. She attempted to garden last weekend and get in touch with Mother Nature and all but even that she found difficulty in. She grabbed at her bike and swung her leg over and settled down. With her bag slung over her back she started to make her way out of the gated home and rode along the sidewalk silently, just listening and breathing.

It's not that she's being selfish, she decided, it's just that 'I think I deserve something beautiful'. Yes, beautiful. Los Angeles isn't beautiful to her anymore- it's only cold and suffocating, masked by a sunny and celebrity sky. She's been here for about seven years now, she calculates, but only a month ago in November did she move into her own home- the home that was supposed to bring maturity, responsibility, and stability. It's just too big and the rooms too far apart and the halls too wide. It makes her feel like all the empty space is condensing with every step she makes. So that's why she's walking out right now, because she couldn't just sit there waiting for Liam to come home.

She turns the sharp corner onto West Sunset Boulevard ignoring the filthy men with their long lenses creeping around her and hops off her bike and locks it with the toughest lock out there. It'd be a good sell on eBay.

The door chimes with the bells hanging off the knob when she shuts it behind her and in order to avoid any certain craze or recognition she immediately jumps behind a bookshelf and takes a deep breath. There is no noise- only soft jazz playing in the backdrop. The shelves tower from the floor to the ceiling with books upon books packed tightly together. She smiles because she is tricked to think that all the visions and thoughts and concerns that are mountain-piled in her mind are folded into the words of the pages of these stories; like the authors ripped her mental state right out of her and typed it up to make some sort of sense.

She isn't sure what section she's in- or for that matter, what she's even searching for- but just being in the bookstore on a Sunday evening hidden by castles of journeys and stories makes her feel comfortable. The thick bindings with rainbow colors and titles etched along the side entice her and she grabs at one just to see what magic she could pull out. It is something terribly sad so she pushes it right back into its space. The next was just too strange and that wouldn't work either. And the next- just a bit too teeny-bopper happy. The more books she pulls from the shelves, the more she realizes what it is that she's looking for- and that is inspiration to be less of who she already is.

And then she takes out the next potential read and she is magically drawn in through this galactic attachment. "Eat, pray, love", Miley reads aloud, "one woman's search for everything across Italy, India and Indonesia." She sits down, legs crossed beneath her, eyes still on the pages and lets this flood of new feelings and thoughts pour into her and swim around in her veins. Like a revelation.

"When you're lost in those woods, it sometimes takes you a while to realize that you are lost. For the longest time, you can convince yourself that you've just wandered off the path, that you'll find your way back to the trailhead any moment now. Then night falls again and again, and you still have no idea where you are, and it's time to admit that you have bewildered yourself so far off the path that you don't even know from which direction the sun rises anymore."

She reads and nearly wants to cry at that overwhelming feeling of knowing that somebody- somewhere out in the world- has felt the same way you do. And now they're okay. And maybe by hearing her struggle and what she did to overcome it, it will grant Miley the inspiration to beat her own endeavors. She continues to read and read because she is so enthralled by the journey of Elizabeth Gilbert. How she just left; parted from her job, her marriage, modern American success; and traveled the world in search of herself and what she truly wanted out of her given life. So maybe… maybe that's what Miley needs to do. 'I would like to meet interesting people', she decides thoughtfully, 'people who will take me as an ordinary girl.' 'Maybe I will see myself in one of them, as if I am living here in this body but my soul is elsewhere. I'd like to breathe another culture, view a simple way of life. I want to just hold hands with Liam. Like just really hold him without a photograph come out of it. This could be good for the both of us. Will he think I am just as senseless about this as I believe myself to be?'

Her phone buzzes in her bag and for the first time since she sat down, she looks away from the book's refreshing words that are moving her towards places she never thought she would gravitate towards. She panics for just a moment when she looks outside the window only to see darkness settling in- which means she totally lost track of time.

"Sushi is on the table. Come home, love."

With a huge smile she shoves her phone back into her bag and stands up to quickly, and inconspicuously, pay for the book. Successfully, she contently rides back home with adventure on her mind.

Feel I'm on the verge of some great truth
Where I'm finally in my place
But I'm fumbling still for proof
And it's cluttering my space
Casting shadows on my face

She puts her bike away in the garage and clamors through the doorway. "Is that you?" Liam calls from the kitchen- but she doesn't answer- and just bounds towards him and hugs the heck out of his very tall self. Her face is smashed up against his back but she manages to say through the squeeze, "I missed you today." He turns around so that they're finally facing each other and replies "I missed you too" as he combs her hair back with his fingers and kisses her softly. They part and sit down at the kitchen table where he's already got the sushi laid out before them. "So what time did your shoot end?" she asks him, wobbling her chop sticks in front of her face while chewing. "I got into the house around 8:30 but I stopped on the way to get dinner. What did you do with yourself all day?" "Oh nothing," she sighs, "Just sort of sat around. I decided to go to the bookstore and was there for a lot longer than I expected." He nods in response and they continue eating silently. The night has now crept in and the bugs of darkness are singing behind the walls. The tv is on in the other room and the sound and the light of it flickers through the empty space like parading shadows. And then she just spills out like her insides have undergone a liberating release.

"I wish we could travel."

Liam looks at her strangely, "Miley, you've been all over the world."

"No," she reaches inside her bag and slides the book across the table for him to see, "I wanna go places."

Liam stares at her with a mix of concern and sympathy. "But why, Miley?"

"Because," she slumps over in a huff, "I think I'm lost."

"Oh yeah?"

"The girl in this book said, "I am a better person when I have less on my plate" and I've realized just that. I have too much! I'm so sick of this material way of living. I'm so ready to trade in all this glamour and status for simplicity and lacking. I've realized that I've done a lot, but there's some things I still want to know. Like I want to know what it's like to go to another country without having to do a concert and press. I want to know how to drive to a different state without being in a tour bus. I want to know what it's like to travel to find yourself, not to sell yourself."

She feels very good at this point. After this outpouring of the thoughts that have been knocking away at her brain, she feels as if she's a deflated balloon but with each new breathe she is rising again. She looks towards Liam earnestly. There is a light that she sees in him- a very forgiving light that tickles through her veins like sun on skin. There is something so selfless and calm about him. This could be an opportunity worth so much more to their love than to Miley herself.

"So let's go."

"But Liam, we can't just go right now."

"Well why not?"

"Because I can't just book out of here, everybody is going to freak out."

"Doesn't matter," he insists, stands up and brings his dishes over to the sink. She can tell his mind is racing too. "We can call your parents tomorrow and let them know what we'll be up to and this week.. we don't even have to be here. We can be wherever you want, being the type of person you want to be. Don't worry about other people, Miley, if this is something you want to do for your own good then do it. I'll be your sidekick through it all."

December 19, 2010

"The only thing more unthinkable than leaving was staying; the only thing more impossible than staying was leaving." – Eat, Pray, Love

Tomorrow Liam and I will be driving down south through California with just two duffel bags tossed into the back of his truck. We don't know where we're going or where we'll end up; but for the next seven days, it's just me, him, this book and it's ideas, and the open world. I don't know where I'll be tomorrow. But I really like the sound of that.

Love & stars,
Miley- a new girl.