Jenny sat at the headboard of her bed trying to concentrate on reading. She had taken that shower; the one she had forgot about in all the excitement and left the water running the entire time. Impressively, it was still hot- the hotel must have massive water heaters- but she felt bad about the waste of water. Instead of getting into the dress when she came out (opening the door a little at a time, towel firmly wrapped around her body), she'd put on some non-aggressive pajamas. She'd covered up as much skin as possible, not because she was uncomfortable around Matilda, but because she wanted to girl to be comfortable around her. Also, she thought the management would take it amiss if the TV went sailing off the balcony. It was a poor attempt at a joke. Jenny put the book down, and drawing her legs up to her chest and putting her arms around them, thought about the problem of Matilda.

She loved the girl. She really did. She'd known when she had first met the girl, 9 years ago, that they were kindred souls. When Matilda had kissed her, well, there had been a very small part of her that wanted to kiss her back. Don't go there, Missy, that way lies madness. Now she was quoting Shakespeare.

It was curiosity, perhaps. In all these years, she had never ever kissed anyone. 30 years old and never been kissed until now, by her 15 year old adoptive daughter. Before Matilda, she'd been too cowed by her Aunt to do more than survive. And afterward...afterward she was still a First Grade Teacher. She was kind and gentle, solid. A buoy of safety in the storm of childhood. She was not sexy. She was not sexual.

She drew her finger along her lip. It seemed fuller than it had before. She remembered the look in Matilda's eyes before she kissed her, then remembered further back to when Matilda had been stunned to see her naked. Matilda thinks I'm sexy. She remembered that choked sound that had come from her throat; half moan, half cry. She shivered, and it wasn't from the cold.

This was ridiculous. This was wrong on so many levels. This could not go on. When we get home, I will go on a date. Should she go out with a man or a woman? she wondered. She would try them both. Regardless, although she was discovering herself finally as a sexual being about 15 years later than she should have, she still didn't have any idea about what to do about Matilda. Her subconsciousness had some ideas, but she pushed them down firmly.

Just then, there was a quiet knock at the door. She went and opened it up. It was Matilda.

"Didn't you have your key?" she asked as she let her in.

"Yes, but I didn't want to surprise you."

Surprise me doing what? she wondered.

Matilda went and sat on her bed, bracing her feet firmly on the ground. Her hands clutched at her knees. Clearly she wanted to say something.

Jenny went and sat on her own bed, facing Matilda in a similar position. Instead of clutching her knees, she grabbed a pillow and put it on her lap. Hugging it was something to distract her hands with.

"Jenny, I'm sorry for letting my emotions get the better of me-"

"Oh Matti, you can hardly be expected to-"

"Please, let me talk. This is hard enough to say as it is."

Reading the pleading look in Matilda's eyes, Jennifer settled back down and said, "Ok."

"I'm sorry for letting my emotions get the better of me down on the bridge, is what I meant. I shouldn't have snapped at you. I definitely shouldn't have kissed you, but I wanted to, even though I knew I shouldn't." She shook her head and put and hand over her eyes.
"I shouldn't have said that last bit, it doesn't help at all." she muttered. Then she looked back up at Miss Honey.

"What I mean to say is that I really don't want you to feel weird around me. I can actually control myself. I'm not a walking danger to the world. At least not so much now."

Jenny leaned forward. This was new. "Oh? How?"

"I figured it out yesterday actually. When I start to feel," she blushed, "the power building up inside, I just concentrate on a picture of something really horrible happening because my power got away from me. That calms me down right quick." And she smiled, a small ironic smile, but a smile none the less. It was the first time she had since she entered the room.

"Matilda! That's awful!"

"But it works."

"It's still awful," Jenny said firmly. "At this stage in life, you should be happy. You should be glorying in being alive, not afraid at your own feelings. I just wish I knew some way to help you."

She saw Matilda's face flush red in the moment before the girl threw herself back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. She firmly did not wonder what image had put that look on the girls face, then wondered what image she had used banish it. Now she felt bad. I've got to be careful what I say. She too lay back on her bed and stared at the ceiling.

In a small voice that Jenny had never heard from her before, Matilda said, "Jenny, do you still want to go out to dinner. I mean, if it isn't too late."

Jennifer brought her watch up to her face and looked at. "No, it's not too late yet. If we hurry."

"Let's go," Matilda said.

"Are you sure?"

"Well, I don't want to hang around in here all night, and I don't want to go to sleep yet. Besides, we have reservations."

"So how about we do it like this. You take a shower and change in the bathroom, and I'll change out here, and I'll let you know it's safe to come out. That way we can avoid awkward situations."

The very fact that Jennifer had to say all that in the first place meant that things were already hopelessly awkward between them. But Matilda didn't verbalize what they both knew to be true, and simply started going through her bags to find what to wear. Soon she had them. A black pair of jeans that fit snugly, and a V necked long sleeve shirt in midnight blue. With a decent pair of earrings, it would pass for light formal. Besides, this was Disneyland. Although the Blue Bayou Restaurant was supposed to be Disney land's version of Fine Dining, there would doubtlessly be plenty of tourists in Hawaiian shirts and sandals.

Halfway through her shower, Jennifer knocked lightly on her door to signal that she was decent. Matilda came out of the bathroom, steam from her shower fogging the mirror that Jenny was using to put on her makeup. But as soon as she saw Jenny she quickly stepped back inside, closed the door and counted to thirty. Then she stepped back out again. Even so, when Jenny went to look for her lipstick, it was floating beside her face. She turned to look at Matilda, a quizzical frown on her face.

Matilda shrugged her shoulders and gave a small grin. "What can I say? You look good."

Jenny plucked the lipstick from the air, pursing her lips primly before she began to apply it. But inwardly, she was smiling. It was nice to see Matilda in good humor again. Dour self defeat was an expression that was never meant to touch Matilda's face, though it had resided there much to often in the recent months.

Over her dress Jenny wore a jean jacket for warmth and to cover her shoulders. Matilda wore her own black jacket. Even with the crystal studs in her ears, she looked faintly dangerous in all dark colors. This impression was helped by the fact that she felt unusually dangerous as well.

While taking her shower, Matilda had come to the conclusion that she was glad that Jenny had found out about her feelings. Most importantly it meant that she didn't have to hide her small bursts of telekinetic power. It was something she had learned from dating Shauna. Letting her power out to play took the edge off, so to speak and prevented it from getting away from her in frightening ways. Besides, when she didn't have to hide it, she enjoyed her powers as much now as she had when she was a kid. Sometimes at night, back at their home, she had purposefully stirred her power by touching herself lightly, not enough to get out of hand but enough so that she had a constant stream of power to play with, moving objects around the room in twisted eternity loops. Once she had even managed to get a whole solar system's worth of books into the air, each one moving at the correct speed compared to the others. She'd had probably forever married science and sex in her mind with that little trick. But she'd never tried to bring herself to orgasm again after that one disastrous attempt had nearly dropped the house on her and Jennifer both.

She firmly shook those thoughts from her head. For lack of anything better, she grabbed Jenny's purse with her mind and levitated it, so that the strap over her shoulder slackened. Jenny, feeling the small weight disappear, looked at Matilda and said, "I guess I shouldn't complain if you want to carry my bags for me." It made Matilda feel all warm and gooey inside, in a way that didn't affect her power at all. She felt happy.

A/N: You do not know how long I wavered about posting this chapter. I mean, virgin at 30 and never been kissed? Its sort of a stretch. But I can't help but think it makes sense for her character. First of all, as a child and teen she's living with this oppressive and physically abusive aunt. She's barely surviving. I doubt she had the time or freedom to go on dates in high school. Then she gets to college. Her aunt doesn't want to shell out a bunch of money, so she goes to a local college, maybe a teaching college. She lives at home, she's shy as hell and she doesn't make friends her own age easily. She might not have even moved into her little cottage until she graduated college. You know, with the diploma in her hand she finds the small spark of rebellion necessary to force her aunt to let her move out. And now she's got her hands full with teaching. She hasn't even finished a whole year of teaching when Matilda gets put in her class, and then Wham! she's suddenly an adoptive mother. She's free of her Aunt, but she has a responsibility toward this girl. Luckily, its pretty easily, the girl is mature for her age and doesn't need a lot of mothering, but there you go. The girl is so wonderful to be around that Jenny doesn't feel the need to socialize that much with other people. Besides, she's growing in confidence as much as Matilda is growing in height at this time, learning how to have fun and all and all pretty much blossoming. These last couple years Matilda has been going to college, so maybe Jenny has the impetus to socialize more, but she's not really ready to date yet. Plus, by now its rather intimidating, since everybody else her age has been doing it for years. She'd rather drink some tea and read a book than go through the hassle.

Oops! I didn't mean to write an essay. But there you go. This is the kind of personal history that I think has led Jennifer to the place she is today. Your mileage may vary. R/R please, I'd love to hear your views!