#61 Pinecone

"L… what if you die?"

L stopped in the doorway of Near's room.

Near hadn't spoken to him since he had announced to the house that he had been asked to join the Kira case, and unfortunately, he would have to go away to Japan, maybe for years. All the other children had come to him over the passing weeks as he made preparations to leave the house and begged him to stay, so desperately the young geniuses loved their idol.

But Near hadn't said a word.

Mello had thrown a fit and clung to L's leg and held on for days before being reassured and removed.

But Near had just quietly and calmly remained in his pearl-coloured bedroom, among his plushies and robots.

It was the last day before he left, and L was making the effort to visit each of the children, to say goodbye.

Near hadn't said anything. He'd offered the small albino boy a hug but he hadn't moved, so L didn't force affection on him.

It was only as he walked to the door that the little boy finally squeaked out "L…what if you die?"

L froze in the door. Of course he'd known it was a possibility, but he had, until now, preferred not to think about it, not to think about leaving this world with so much left to do, not think about leaving all these children alone in the world, no gaurdian… he knew there was Roger, and Watari, of course, but the kids looked up to him. Some of them saw him as their older brother.

Others, like Near, saw him as a father.

"Near…" he sighed. "..I will do my utmost not to die during this case, but… you know there's a chance."

Near nodded slowly. "…What if you die then? What will happen to the house? To… to the others?"

L slowly walked back to Near's bed and sat heavily next to him. "If I die… Watari will delete all the case files I have accumulated about Kira, the only copies will be sent to Roger's computer before a pre-set program erases the hard drives of all my databases. Those case files will be sent to…"

Near shook his head, clutching his plushie panda tight. "No, not 'what will happen with the case', 'What will happen with… with us?'"

L felt his heart wrench in half at the sight of those soft pink eyes blinking back tears. His little Near was struggling not to cry, struggling not to act like any small child loosing someone they loved would.

"Near…" L sighed, and looked around the room. His eyes rested on Near's shelf, covered in robots, toys and other small things Near had discovered and become fascinated with.

One of them was a large pinecone, about the only natural thing in the room, looking out-of-place among the plastic and plush.

He reached and took the item down, turning it over in his hands. "Near, do you know that this is?"

"It's a pinecone." Near muttered darkly, giving L a look of 'I'm a genius.'

L nodded, "Yes Near, but it's also a collection of seeds… and they're all going to grow into trees."

Near frowned.

"And those seeds don't need their tree to grow, they can do it on their own."

Near blinked. "… I think I understand what you mean L…" he took the pinecone and examined it.

L smiled and walked once more towards the door.

"But L… I'm not a pinecone." Near squeaked.

L pretended not to have heard. He didn't know how else to explain that when he died, Near would be on his own.