Chapter 7: Open Mic Night
"Yet another riveting lecture from the think tank that is Dr. Oscar Apple," Bryan groaned as class came to a close. "Who would have thought you take an idea like alchemy and make it so freaking boring?"
"It wasn't that bad," Hayley argued. "I like hearing the ancient theories on magic Duel Monsters cards. It's just too bad it isn't real." And the reason for teaching a lecture on a subject that has been disproved lay in the necessity of teaching the students about the evolution of Duel Monsters and all the biggest theories of the cards, including those theories that seem ridiculous to the rational mind.
"Oh, so now you're talking to me civilly?" Bryan replied. "Last week I asked if I could borrow a piece of paper and you threatened to castrate me. Why do you think I've been staring at you all day? Every time you grabbed a pencil, my butt clenched so tightly you could stick a lump of coal up there and get back a diamond."
"Thank you for that disturbing image," muttered Nick Sims on his way out of the classroom. Nick was a sophomore in the Yellow Dorm who was never really fond of Bryan. His dislike started back during freshman year when Bryan repeatedly trounced Nick's best friend Thomas Estrada in a series of revenge duels, all of which started when Bryan hit on Thomas's girlfriend Kasumi Okuyama, who, incidentally, broke up with Thomas and started dating Matt, who also defeated Nick in a similar series of duels, and they all lived in the house that Jack built*.
"Personally, I think you could be a poet," Matt told Bryan with a pat on the back. "It would be about as effective as your stand-up comedy career, if you remember that effort."
"I was funny!" Bryan replied emphatically.
"I thought so, too, but your humor caters to a very particular crowd."
"Girls," Bryan answered. To prove his point, he put his arm around the nearest female student on her way out of the classroom. Jessica Parks had long, honey blond hair, sky blue eyes, and skin ever-so-subtly darkened by the sun. She was one of the more thoughtful students in class, actually volunteering to answer the questions Dr. Apple occasionally posed to the class without having to pull her teeth to get her to speak. She was a strong-willed young woman, quite athletic, and was actually the one responsible for keeping Bryan's softball team from winning the intramural tournament last year. A really well placed throw from the outfield made a one-hop to the catcher just seconds before Bryan made it all the way around. His grudge was short-lived, however, when he realized the dining hall was giving away leftover muffins.
"You'd be interested in joining me for a night of comedy, wouldn't you, Jessica?"
"You must have me confused with somebody numb, or at least single enough to be swayed by your Tom Selleck mustache."
That's when Alister Kazama stepped up and hooked his arm around Jessica's neck and leaned in to kiss her on the top of her head. She backed away from Bryan and removed herself from his playful grip, reminding Bryan that he wasn't dating every girl who walked by him.
"Don't you have your own mental patient to attend to you?" Alister asked him. He was a bit taller than Jessica, had darker skin and brown eyes, and he let his jet black hair grow to a medium length in order to pull it back into a ponytail. Like Jessica, he was a resident of the Yellow Dorm with a penchant for physical activity; he mostly enjoyed slamball, which is full contact basketball played on trampolines. Not a lot of duelists really cared to play with him, and so he played whichever intramural sports for he could get a team together.
"So he keeps forgetting," Jessica agreed, leaning back on Alister's chest and shoulder.
Bryan held up his hands in surrender. "Hey. Just because she's on a diet doesn't mean she can't look at the menu."
Jessica scoffed and pulled Alister toward the door. "See you Tuesday, Bryan."
"Killjoy," Bryan muttered in reply to being blown off. He caught sight of Hayley again and flinched dramatically, retreating to Matt's arms for protection.
"I honestly don't know what you're talking about," Hayley told him. "I've never threatened you."
"Oh," Bryan said sarcastically. "Then you didn't threaten to pull off my head and give it to Dr. Houtz as a birthday present?"
Hayley's expression was one of combined confusion and realization. She knew what must have happened, but she wasn't sure of a way to explain it without seeming crazy. "I think you probably just took my words out of context."
"I'm sure that was it," Matt agreed. He gave a gentle wave as Hayley left the room. When she was out of sight, he smacked Bryan's shoulder and said, "What are you doing? That girl's crazy. Why are you trying to upset her?"
"Sorry. I just tend to get a little confused when someone who threatens me on a regular basis suddenly looks at me the same way Lucy does when Marvin Gaye is playing."
"Personally, I think she's unstable."
"Yeah? Well, I think she just doesn't know how to express her love for the Knight."
"I can't believe you would think about romance with a girl who has threatened to end all your romances on more than one occasion."
"Matt, some cultures consider that to be a form of wooing."
"Yeah, but those cultures are all insects."
As a welcome relief from the near bickering behavior that these two sworn brothers sometimes showed one another, Rory Ruiter poked her head into the classroom to say "hi." Both guys instantly stood up straight and put on relaxed, casual faces to make it seem as if they weren't just moments ago mocking one another in a childish manner.
"What are you guys up to?" she asked.
"Same old stuff," Matt replied. "What brings you to this part of the building?"
"Nothing terribly important," she replied honestly. "I just wanted to say 'hi' and maybe ask if you'd be interested in going into Kazuki with me tonight."
"You're going into town?" Matt repeated. "Why?"
"There's a little restaurant that does open mic night on Thursdays, and I thought it would be fun to invite a couple of friends to come with me."
Bryan seemed excited about the idea, but Matt was hesitant. "I don't know about that. I'm really not supposed to fraternize with any of my students outside of class or office hours."
"You don't have any students," Bryan reminded him.
"I teach Dr. West's class from time to time."
"You grade their papers."
"That counts!"
Rory was rather amused by the exchange between these two. But she was disappointed when Matt told her that as a teaching assistant, he wasn't supposed to be social with the students in that class. Someone might bring the accusation that her good grades weren't the result of her own intelligence or studious behavior but because she was getting favors from the one grading the papers, maybe because she was doing him favors.
"Wink," Bryan added by saying the word out loud.
"Subtle," was Matt's dry reply. Then his phone saved him from any further snapping. Once again, it was Kasumi calling to see where he was and what he was up to. He dismissed himself for a moment to answer the phone and try to convince his girlfriend that it was pure coincidence that Rory stopped by again.
"Are you familiar with the term 'whipped'?" Bryan asked Rory.
"It seems like she's trying to, but Matt's a little more resistant than that. I don't think he'd fall for simple guilt trips."
"Well, you know him pretty well for someone whose interactions are mostly limited to statistical formulas. You're not stalking him, are you?"
"Just enough to know he's too good for her." Bryan raised his eyebrows in shock and avoided saying anything lest he accidentally add fuel to the fire, which somehow started even without the kindling. She bumped her shoulder into him and scoffed. "Like you didn't already know I like him."
"I picked up on subtle clues," he admitted. Like the fact that she keeps showing up after class or that she invited him to come to an open mic night. Actually, maybe Matt felt some ethical reason to deny the invitation, but Bryan thought it could be fun. He put his arm around Rory and hugged her tightly. "I'll go to your open mic night, even if Grumps Luther over there won't."
"Yeah?" She was excited to have at least one of them agree to go.
"Yeah. Are you performing?"
"I plan to sing a song or two. They have a nice little karaoke machine to back me up."
"Nice. You've got a pretty voice. I can think of no better first date than to listen to you sing." Rory just smiled and continued walking between Bryan's arm and his bear-sized chest. Meanwhile, Matt stayed on the phone and tried to remember how to say "I'm not cheating on you" in Japanese.
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Ellie's closest friends graduated last spring, and she found herself spending more time with other people who lived in the Yellow Dorm, including her roommate Kasumi, who was a little annoyed that her schedule so conflicted with Matt's that the two rarely saw one another for dinner.
"Is he really that busy?" Ellie wondered aloud.
"He doesn't have much free time between taking classes, planning Dr. West's entire academic life, and running things with Team OTK. He usually has to grab some food from the Blue D-Hall and take it back to his room to eat while he works."
"Does he ever drop food on the papers?" Darius asked, hoping for some ammunition to make jokes at his former roommate's expense.
"I don't know. You'd have to ask the freshmen."
Before she could say anything else, Sean and Maikeru dropped their trays rather loudly onto the table. Most notable was that Sean's tray held four glasses full of water, and as soon as he released the tray, he headed straight back to the drink dispensers.
"What's going on?" Kasumi asked, sounding somewhere between annoyed and amused.
Maikeru sighed. "Sean learned today in kinesiology that the average person is supposed to drink at least eight eight-ounce glasses of water per day."
"Eight ounces per day?" Darius misheard. "That is an underestimate. You get that much just from staying hydrated."
"Eight eight-ounce glasses," Maikeru repeated with emphasis. "Sixty-four ounces, in other words. So, in light of this knowledge, Sean decided he's going to drink eight eight-ounce glasses of water with dinner."
"Why?" Ellie asked.
"Just because," Maikeru said. There was no more eloquent explanation.
When Sean brought four more glasses and placed them around his tray, Darius informed him, "You are going to spend all night in the bathroom."
"But I'll be healthy," Sean countered as he began chugging glass number one.
Darius started to ask Ellie about her day, but her attention was stuck at the next table where Victor Rocks was getting annoyed with his two lackeys Ty and Clyde. They were going off about some duel they'd lost to a guy they'd never seen before. Ty was pretty sure it was not a man but a monster, and Clyde was sure it was a ghost. Ellie thought the conversation was hilarious.
Vic Rocks was not only his name, but also his favorite expression. He was a good duelist who tended to thrive on attention. Whether that meant challenging the Guardian Duelers in attempt to take the god cards from them or starting fights over trivial matters, Vic tried to drag the spotlight wherever he went. That's why he got so frustrated when his cronies continued to talk about another duelist.
"So you lost a duel," he groaned. "So what. I beat you guys all the time."
"He beat us both!" Ty emphasized.
"Really?" Now Vic sounded offended. How could someone dare treat his servants like that? "You dueled him two-on-one and he still beat you?" Ty and Clyde nodded eagerly. He pounded his fist on the table and said, "Well, then that punk will have to deal with my wrath!"
Pushing herself into the conversation, Kasumi asked, "What kind of deck did he use?"
Vic glanced back at her with a scowl on his face. "I don't remember inviting you into this conversation, toots."
"Toots?" Ellie repeated. "I'd be stingy in the use of such language around Kasumi. She'll kick your butt if you push her too hard."
"I like 'em feisty," Vic replied. He was a street kid with a youth not unlike Darius's, but whereas Darius learned to tolerate other people and knew the pain of fighting, Vic seemed to thrive on that pain and rarely seemed happy if he wasn't starting something.
Darius asked Ty and Clyde, "Where did you find this duelist? Is he a resident of the Blue Mansion?"
"He must be," Clyde said. "He was too good to be a Yellow. He caught us at the bus stop last night and forced us to duel him. He had this weird deck with a bunch of undead cards I've never heard of."
"Knowing these two, the guy could use any zombie cards," Maikeru commented dryly.
Vic pointed out, "Don't you use zombie cards, Mike?"
"That's not my name," Maikeru replied. "And it wasn't me."
To be sure, Darius asked what the guy looked like. Ty explained that they never actually saw his face. He was pretty well hidden in the shadows, and they were intimidated by his presence to the point they weren't really paying attention. They remembered him being eight feet tall, six hundred pounds, and having a voice even deeper than Darth Vader's. Darius was pretty sure they were not the most reliable witnesses.
"It sounds like the guy merely frightened them," he suggested.
Vic asked with discernable frustration in his voice, "How did he force you to duel? Did he at least do anything to you when you lost?" Ty and Clyde looked at one another and shook their heads hesitantly, pretty sure nothing bad happened after the duel. "Well, then I'm going to have to find him and teach him a lesson," Vic decided.
"You have fun with that," Maikeru said. He turned back to his own food and caught sight of Sean, who looked rather miserable at the moment. He was leaning back in his seat and had one hand pressed lightly against his belly.
"I feel sick."
Maikeru groaned and muttered, "You're an idiot."
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Bryan never spent all that much time in Kazuki. The Duel Academy campus had pretty much everything he needed to keep himself happy, healthy, and entertained, including a card shop that received regular shipments to restock. There was never a real reason to go into town. And that novelty is what added a bit of excitement to attending an open mic night.
"Duel gruel?" Bryan read, readying a comment about how disgusting that sounded.
"It says 'Duel Grille,'" Rory corrected him.
He took a better look at the sign and realized he was just being dyslexic. "Oh, yeah. That doesn't sound so bad."
On such short notice, only Bryan, Lili Von, Carter Jade, Clint Ealey, and Synthia Spencer came from Duel Academy to cheer Rory on. Bryan was sure they could have brought a bigger crowd if they had advertised the event a little earlier in advance.
"Matt was the grand prize," Lili admitted to him. "She waited until he declined to invite other people." Bryan just purred; he liked when women took the initiative. Rory giggled in response.
The diner wasn't especially large, but it had a decent space for open mic night. There was space for about fifty patrons if they were reasonably friendly and didn't need enough elbow space to do the Electric Slide. The corner of the diner had a small stage set up with a microphone and stand, a single stool, and an old karaoke machine, busted in that it did not provide lyrics to the user; it did, however, provide musical accompaniment for anyone who didn't bring his or her own.
"This is cool," Carter said, eagerly planting himself at one of the booths. He immediately grabbed one of the menus and started looking through it as Lili sat down beside him. "Ooo, chili cheese dog! What do you think?" He looked from Lili to the waitress who approached the table. "Two chili cheese dogs, please."
"I think I'll pass," Lili replied.
Carter shrugged. "Who's offering?" He look to the waitress again and repeated, "Two chili cheese dogs, please."
"This place is pretty nice," Bryan commented. "I may have to come here more often."
"You should," Rory agreed. "The other people who come here are pretty good, and they show such a variety of talents." She noticed a man standing by the door to the kitchen and said, "Oh! There's Tommy. I need to go talk to him to sign myself up."
"I'll go with you," Bryan offered.
At eight o'clock, Tommy Caruthers, a suave and ruggedly handsome twenty-six-year-old who worked at the diner. He was chosen to host open mic night because of his looks and his charm, mostly the way he smiled without even trying, as if the corners of his mouth were caused by his dimples and not the other way around.
The acts were pretty wide and varied. Most of the acts tended to be poets of one genre or another. Some read rhyming poetry, some read free verse, and some simply expressed gripes about the world. And Rory was not the only musician; one returning guy played guitar—one cover and one original—and a couple brought an electric guitar, a bass, and an amp.
"This is pretty good," Bryan commented during one metal song in which the vocal synthesizers made lyrics impossible to discern.
"It's delicious," Carter agreed as he licked his fingers from his first chili cheese dog.
"Oh, shut up," groaned Lili.
"I mean it. What's in this? Pimento loaf?"
"Enough with the hot dog!" Lili commanded. "We're here for Rory—not your tongue."
"I'm sorry," Carter said sarcastically. "I forget: Are we in an auditorium with a snack bar, or a diner with a stool on stage?"
"Stool," Synthia agreed.
"I thought so. This place is primarily an eating establishment. It would be irresponsible, not to mention rude, of me not to partake of the food they spend all day dreaming up new and delicious ways of assembling. Especially something that smells so heavenly." He lifted his second chili cheese dog and took in the bouquet just as a wine connoisseur with the cork.
"He has a point," Synthia said. She didn't have the chili cheese dog, but she did order for herself an omelet that was made with just the right spices to give it a zing. "That was so good if you put it on your head, your tongue would slap your brains out trying to get it." Holding an imaginary microphone in her hand and extending it in front of Lili's face, she said, "Lili? Your rebuttal?"
Synthia Spencer was five-foot-three, had really long hair colored a flawless teal shade, and she was a bubbly girl—so lively, in fact, that she sometimes got on people's nerves by egging on anyone who was too quiet or sedate for her taste. She really liked Lili because she seemed the most likely to get in a verbal spat at any given time, and those were always amusing in Synthia's eyes. What made her fun to hang around, though, was that she had a distinct Southern drawl, which occasionally led her to use words that other students either never heard of or couldn't spell.
Lili groaned and looked to her roommate. "When do you go up, Rory?"
"I don't know," she answered with an apology. "Tommy puts my name on the list, and he'll call me up when he gets there. I don't think it'll be too long; there were only six or seven names in front of mine, I think."
"Well, we're on act number six," Clint noted. "I can't wait to hear you sing. This should be the most exciting thing to happen this week."
"Way to sensationalize," Lili commented dryly.
When the metal duo ended their second song, a total performance of about ten minutes, the audience applauded and Tommy thanked the duo for coming out and sharing their music with the crowd. Then he put on a big smile and announced that they had a returning act tonight.
"A beautiful and talented young singer who started coming here a few weeks ago and has just blown us away every time. You're in for a real treat; I'm sure you'll love it. Let's welcome Rory!" Rory got up from her seat and approached the stage. Tommy asked her briefly if she was going to do just one song tonight or if she prepared two; she opted for one because she didn't want to bother everyone too much, which Tommy argued was not the reaction she was going to get.
Tommy handed off the microphone and started the karaoke machine. The music started up with a low, fast, piano beat, and Rory began singing Joe Cocker's "The Letter." Her voice was strong and well supported; Bryan thought it amazing to hear such a voice coming from a relatively small girl. Clint stared onstage with stars in his eyes, which did not go unnoticed by Lili; she thought he was trying to hard to get noticed.
"That's amazing," Carter commented. "I didn't realize she had such a deep voice."
"It's not that deep," Lili said. "She's just loud and strong. It makes me nostalgic for my violin."
"You play violin?" Bryan repeated. "I think Matt played some trumpet in high school. You two should get together and jam."
"Nothing harmonizes better than a trumpet-violin duo," Lili mocked. Fortunately, "The Letter" is not a long song and so Rory returned to the table directly among applause and general praise.
"That was beautiful," Tommy announced to the audience; maybe he wanted one of those neon signs that tells the audience when to applaud. "Let's have another round of applause for Rory!" The crowd applauded once more, though less intensely the second time.
"Next up, we have a new act. A very funny guy: Bryan!" He peered back into the crowd and tried to hide his eyes from the overhead light. "Are you out there, Bryan?"
"Right behind you, Elmer Fudd." Tommy turned to find Bryan already anticipated his turn on stage and stood silently behind him. Tommy laughed and handed off the microphone. Bryan took a look at the crowd and smiled. "How's everyone doing tonight?" Although not an incredibly lively crowd, they did return some cheers. "I must admit, I'm doing pretty well," Bryan said casually. "I finally digested that gum I swallowed in grade school."
This joke was one Bryan used to size up the comedic level of the crowd. If a person laughed at that joke, he or she had a sophisticated sense of humor and/or brain trauma; lack of laughter indicated someone who didn't care to think while listening to humor. The crowd was dead silent except for Rory giggling softly.
"Okay," Bryan muttered. "Back to fart jokes and swear words."
*If you have never read The House that Jack Built (a poem), you should do so to understand this joke. And no, I'm not that old; I'm just that random and I thought it was funny.
I don't know for sure what the next chapter will be. I think I'll show another piece of Matt's life (i.e., Team OTK) and come back to the Ghost Duelist in stride. You can be sure someone will duel him/her eventually, though. I also think it's about time my second main character finally hits the dueling field again.
I want to have all the characters duel at least once, but each will have to wait until the story allows; I don't like to throw them in haphazardly. Sorry if your character hasn't dueled yet, but I don't like to force these things. I might throw in a Tag Team Tournament later just because I think it will be fun and I have a few zippy one-liners to riff. I think everyone will get the chance to duel then if not sooner.
Credits:
Darius Mantzios....tiramisu19
Jason Maxim....Maxim and Knight
Nathan Zislaw....Mavrik Zero
Hillary Delaney....Nodqfan144
Lili Von....Happy2BMe
Carter Jade....Jaden2010
Mitsuro Itachu....Titanic X
Sean Bivins....DarkVestroia2
Naoto Kurotsuki....Kurotsuki Haru
Hayley Wilson....TeamRocketDiva
Maikeru Stone....onyxshade7
Victor Rocks....Iron-Arm-V
Alister Kazama & Jessica Parks....ZaneKazama001
Synthia Spencer.....disaster
Everyone else so far....YamiRuss