Chapter Six
"Happy Valentine's day, my love. I made you some breakfast!"
Itachi sat up in his bed, rubbing his eyes as Kisame made his way across their room carrying a tray of coffee and pancakes. He sat down beside him and placed the tray on the bedside table.
"...Thank you" said Itachi, feeling slightly stunned at the kind gesture.
Kisame grinned, baring his shark teeth in a way that would terrify most people. Itachi, however, regarded Kisame's smile as one of the most beautiful things about him. Not that he would ever admit that, of course.
"So do I get a kiss?"
Itachi leaned over and gave him a peck on the cheek, like a shy girl on her first date.
"Let's not kid ourselves, Itachi-san," smirked Kisame, knowing the Uchiha had done it purposefully to tease him. He hooked one strong arm around the Itachi's neck and the other on the back of his head, running his fingers through that raven hair.
He moved in, closing his eyes after Itachi did. He pressed his lips firmly against the other's and then opened both together, pushing in his tongue slowly as if they had all the time in the world. As Itachi's smaller tongue move against his towards his mouth and as Itachi put his arms around Kisame's neck to kiss deeper, the older heart did a little flip of joy; Itachi was so cute when he responded!
After breaking apart to breathe, Itachi rested his head his head against the other's chest, listening to the heartbeat. Kisame put his arm around Itachi and put his nose against his partner's hair to inhale the sweet scent he knew so well...
"Yo Kisame!" Hidan burst into the room without knocking or asking for permission. "I need to use some of those 'Tame that Beast' of yours, where do y-"
His eyes widened as he noticed the tray of breakfast on the bedside table. "Breakfast in bed, huh? Now that's what I call special service. What, are you asking for more sex or something? I don't blame you but, I heard you only get laid once a week or some shit."
"No I am not asking for more sex!" said Kisame quickly – a bit too quickly for Itachi's liking. "It's in the top drawer. What do you need my pills for anyway? It's not like you need to restrain yourself." Not like I do...
"I do today," answered Hidan as he went through the drawer. "I've decided not to let Kakuzu fuck me until he stops being so stubborn. It's not in here, Kisame, all I see is condoms..." When was the last time Kakuzu used a condom? I can't even remember... stingy bastard.
"Oh sorry, try the next drawer down."
"Aha, gotcha!" Said Hidan triumphantly. He ran out of the room clutching the Kisame's fairly expensive bottle of testosterone reduction pills without even a word of thanks.
"You bought more condoms?"
"I'm sorry, Itachi-san!" said Kisame guiltily. "I don't want to pressure you. I just thought today was special, so you might want to... You might let me, well..."
"...I bought some too."
Kisame's eyes widened in joy and his heart fluttered with relief. He held Itachi in a tight embrace. "You really do care!"
Itachi rolled his eyes but let out a small smile. "Of course I do."
Kisame pecked Itachi, and then grinned cunningly against his neck.
"Well then, let's get to it baby. These condoms aren't going to use themselves..."
A short while later Hidan ventured into the kitchen to get something to eat, but stopped in his tracks to let out a low wolf whistle, but it went unheard. For there on the kitchen counter sat Deidara, making out heavily with Sasori. And Hidan had to admit, it was pretty damned hot.
"I love you Danna," gasped the blonde, breaking away from the kiss. Sasori took this opportunity to move into his neck, sucking on the delicious skin there.
"Love you too Dei," he muffled.
"Well well well. This is unlike you, Puppet-boy, getting it on so early in the morning. Finally decided to loosen up, eh?"
Deidara let out an embarrassed yelp upon realising that Hidan had been watching them. He pushed his 'Danna' away, and hurriedly tried to fix his shambolic appearance, while Sasori glared dangerously at Hidan.
"Get out."
Hidan grinned and raised his hands mockingly. "Hey, I'm just here to have breakfast – something most people do in the kitchen. Seriously, what's with everyone today? You're all acting like horny little bastards. I mean, it's almost as if..."
"As if it's Valentine's Day?" Sasori rolled his eyes. "Yeah, that's because it is, idiot."
Hidan's blinked twice and opened his mouth to speak, but for once nothing came out. He appeared to be in shock. He turned around and left the room in complete silence.
"What's up with that guy?" asked Sasori, with one eyebrow raised.
Deidara shrugged, and frowned in worry.
When Kakuzu finally found Hidan, he was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the clearing in the forest nearby the Akatsuki base. It seemed he was reciting some Jashinist prayer - with the way his head was bowed, and he was clutching his necklace in one hand and drawing something (Jashin related, most likely) on the ground with his other. Ignoring the way his hearts hammered with unnecessary rigour at the sight of his non-lover, Kakuzu strode over to him.
"There you are. What are you doing over here?"
Hidan didn't look up. So I take it you're still sulking, Hidan?
"You didn't come to bed last night," Kakuzu said pointedly.
Again, Hidan didn't look up; he simply continued to draw symbols in the dirt with his finger.
"I felt like sleeping on the couch."
"Well, I didn't get to fuck you – are you not going to apologise?" Kakuzu smirked inwardly, knowing Hidan would get riled up at that remark.
"Yeah, sorry about that..." replied Hidan nonchalantly.
-Wait, what? "What's wrong with you, Hidan?"
"...Nothing's wrong-"
"-Stop the bullshit, Hidan." snapped Kakuzu, angry at Hidan's show of indifference towards him. "I fucking know there's something wrong with you, and if I ask what's wrong, then I fucking expect to be informed what's wrong."
Hidan raised his head to face Kakuzu's fierce glare. There was a prolonged pause, and then; "Kakuzu, don't you ever wish we were different? You know, more romantic or whatever, like Kisame and Itachi, or Sasori and Deidara. I guess you wouldn't, but I know I do sometimes... Can't you give it a chance?"
"What are you talking about?" Said Kakuzu quickly, feeling suddenly fretful at the unexpected turn of the conversation.
Hidan paused again, before speaking. "Today's Valentine's Day. You didn't... you didn't get me shit." Or
"So? We don't do that kind of shit."
"Well did you ever think I might want to?"
"You do? Are you serious?"
"Don't use that fucking tone with me; of course I'm serious... I mean, sort of. Well –look I don't know, alright? I'm kind of confused right now. But, would it kill you to be a bit romantic once in a while?"
Kakuzu became very pissed off (again), for reasons unbeknown to him - he didn't actually care that Hidan had basically just called him unromantic, right?
"God damnit, Hidan. You're actually telling me to be romantic? Did you not realise over the last two years we've spent together that I'm not that kind of a person? I mean, I knew you were dense, but honestly... Look, why don't you get someone else to fuck you? Or should I say 'make love'? Because you're obviously not satisfied with me."
"Hey! Don't you fucking turn this against me! I'm the one with a problem, so you better stop being such a dick to me, got it?
"You want me to stop being a dick? Then don't start saying this sort of crap, because I don't care about it. Now as soon as you get that message through to your tiny brain, I'll be waiting in our bedroom-"
"So that's it then?" cried Hidan. "That's all I am to you, is it? Your obedient little fuckbuddy? Hah! Well I bet you didn't expect that your fuckbuddy would ever leave you. That's fucking right – I've had enough! Enough of the lack of respect, enough selfishness from you, and definitely enough of begging you, every fucking day for the past two years, for you to let me top. Because not once could you give up your control over me – not once."
Kakuzu chuckled unkindly, totally disregarding Hidan's threats of leaving. "Hidan, try all you want but I'll never let you leave me."
Hidan scowled, furious at Kakuzu's dismissive attitude. "Yeah? Just fucking watch me!"
He got up and stormed towards the heart of the forest, away from the Akatsuki base, but found he was immediately stopped as those damned tentacles appeared from nowhere and wrapped tightly around him. For a moment Hidan struggled against his binds helplessly, and then gave up. He threw his head back and screamed in frustration and defeat.
Kakuzu walked over to stand behind him and gripped his shoulder. Black fingernails dug into Hidan's skin, causing him to gasp in pain. "Fuck off," Hidan said weakly, knowing there was no point. In a flash, Kakuzu pulled him in and bear-hugged him almost forcefully from behind. He retracted his tentacles and rested his chin in the crook of Hidan's neck.
"Come on, Hidan, don't be like this..." he breathed into Hidan's ear. Hidan remained perfectly still, refusing to respond in any way.
Kakuzu sighed and decided to confess. "Look Hidan, I don't think of you as my fuckbuddy. I have to admit though, I tried to think of you that way. I tried to make myself believe that that was all you were to me, but I was wrong."
Silence.
"Hida-"
"...Then tell me."
"What?"
"Tell me what you of me. Go on, what are you fucking waiting for?"
Kakuzu opened his mouth to speak, but found he didn't quite know what to say. He knew exactly what he felt about Hidan; he realised now that he had been denying to himself his true and deepest feelings for a long time. But how to put it in the right words without getting the wrong reaction from Hidan, he didn't know. He decided to play it safe.
"Uh, I-I love you..?"
"Bullshit!" spat Hidan, seeing straight through Kakuzu's improvisation. "Is that all you can come up with? 'I love you'... fucking ridiculous."
"Hidan, I-"
"No! Just- just shut up! Stop pushing me around, ok, don't think that you can have your own way all the time. Newsflash for Kakuzu – I'm not your fucking slave, or your personal whore or your fuckbuddy – I'm not gonna tell you that I love you, just to make you feel good about yourself, do you fucking understand? Oh, and you wanna know why else I'm not going to say it? BECAUSE I FUCKING HATE YOU!"
Kakuzu sighed. That was definitely the wrong reaction. It was time now to tell the truth; to expose his most private thoughts and feelings. He supposed there was no harm in saying the truth now; it wasn't like things could get much worse.
"Alright, you really want to know what I think of you? Fine." He whirled Hidan around by the shoulders so that he could look him straight in the eye.
"I take back what I said; I don't love you."
The rage in Hidan's eyes intensified ten fold, but Kakuzu interrupted him before he could start yelling again.
"No, what I feel for you is more than love. Much, much more. It's the deepest and most intense emotion I've ever felt in my life, yes, even a life as long as mine. I really can't describe it, but I need you Hidan, so much that I don't think you understand, I don't think you'll ever understand. I feel like I can't fucking breathe without you, whether it's when I'm on a mission with someone else, or when you leave our bed after sex, or any other time you're not there with me.
When I'm fucking you, Hidan – when I'm inside you– oh God, it feels so damn good – it's like the ultimate sense of pleasure. Do you know why, Hidan? It's because you're my perfect match, my equal... And when I look at your face, that absolutely delicious orgasmic face of yours, I know that I'm the perfect match for you. You belong to me; that's why I can fuck you whenever the hell I want and hurt you however the hell I please. You're my possession.
You're right about me being selfish – I don't know anyone nearly as selfish as I am; I want to have you all to myself and all of you to myself. Sometimes I imagine myself chaining you up naked, somewhere dark and cold, somewhere only I have access to; so that no one else has access to you and you belong to me alone. I hate it when you devote yourself to Jashin, I hate it when you have a mission with anyone eIse, I hate it when you get angry at anyone other than me because anger is a strong emotion, and you should only show such emotions to me. And something even more selfish is that, for that same reason, I love hurting you. I feel like I'm going insane when I see you respond to the pain that I inflict on you, and the smallest of things trigger this feeling: the angry cursing when you yell at me for cutting off your head; that God-awful groan you make when I bite you; the trickle of blood when your ass tears if I fuck you hard enough..."
Kakuzu was gripping Hidan's shoulders now, and his tone of voice was on the verge of hysterical. It was embarrassing as all hell, but there was also not a chance in hell he'd stop now, not when the words he had kept to himself for so long were spilling out so easily.
"...But that's not the worst of it. I often hate myself for this and I wouldn't be surprised if you do as well, although you most likely already do; the worst of it is that when I die, I want to take you with me. Yes, that's right - I want you to give up your immortality and die with me. It's the most selfish thing someone could ever want, I know that, and yet... I don't want you to live in this world unless it's with me. I want us to die together – kill each other, even. Because I know that we belong together; we perfect each other, don't you see?"
Kakuzu swallowed thickly and, after getting no response from his partner, spoke again in a quieter voice. "And... I want you to be with me for all eternity. This is how I truly feel about you Hidan. If you hate me for it, fine. I expect you to hate me. But I'm not letting you go, ever. You can try to leave me, you can try to run away, but I will come after you. You're staying with me, forever."
Kakuzu watched Hidan intently when he was finished and, as he expected, Hidan was turned away from him and glaring at the ground. I suppose it was inevitable that Hidan would hate me.
"...Fuck you, Kakuzu."
He sighed, preparing for the worst. "What do you want, Hidan?"
"You're turning me on so much right now."
Hidan looked up and met Kakuzu's surprised eye, and immediately Kakuzu realised that Hidan was indeed very aroused. The needy and accusing look in Hidan's eyes was unmistakeable. However, this arousal was deeper than sexual; it was more than just blood flowing to the lower regions. It was as if Hidan wanted Kakuzu not just for his body, but for his soul too. Hidan desired Kakuzu's being. Just like Kakuzu desired his.
Wordlessly, Kakuzu reached out and pulled Hidan in close, embracing him tightly. As he felt Hidan clutch his back, he squeezed his eyes shut – nothing was important now, only this intimate contact. He pulled Hidan closer against him, closer, closer, and Hidan did the same, continuing even when both could not breathe. It was truly as though they were trying to kill each other with love, as though they were trying to prove whose feelings ran stronger.
Eventually, it was Hidan who gave out first – yes he was immortal, but the feeling of suffocation wasn't exactly appealing. Kakuzu noticed as Hidan's grip on him loosen considerably, and he could breathe again. However, Kakuzu didn't let go, and Hidan's chest frantically rose and fell, desperate for air. He looked up at Kakuzu pleadingly, and reached up to touch Kakuzu's lips clumsily, as if doing so would give him breath.
"Y-you're kill-ing me- K-kaku-zu." He choked out, and his eyes began rolling toward the back of his head.
"Good."
But Kakuzu released his hold, despite his cold reply. Hidan immediately collapsed on the floor, coughing and gasping with each inhale of air. Then his eyes went wide as Kakuzu pulled his head upwards and kissed him fiercely, forcing his tongue inside. Hidan, who was already breathless, tried beating at Kakuzu's chest with his fists. When that didn't work he tried to push away desperately, even though it was no use. Kakuzu smirked at Hidan's panic, and finally decided to pull away.
"Bastard!" Hidan spluttered out as soon as he could breathe again. "You kn-knew I couldn't, fucking breathe! I b-bet you were, getting off on, t-that!"
Kakuzu smirked. "Perhaps I was. Would you like to check?"
And so it began.