Chapter7: Rebellion
A few nights were all she needed to for the storm of illness to pass and for full recovery to be made. Even with the body composition of an ordinary human, the resilience of an Einzbern homunculus did pull through and hasten her victory over the microscopic intruders. So much so that all the worries of the earlier day just seemed excessive.
If there was anything that she wasn't quite so pleased with, it was the fact that Berserker's presence had all but disappeared during the duration of her recovery. With the command spells emblazoned across her body, she could be certain that no harm had befallen him. Nevertheless, the realization only fed the flames of her displeasure.
He wasn't beside her for a reason and she was dying to know why.
Perhaps it was the very presence of this thought that imbued her with the strength to kick away the downy blanket on the morning of the third day. She had her share of being confined to the bed, initially with the illness, and later with the maids' fits of overprotection.
But hunting even the giant of a man down the corridor of their castle was no easy feat with all the interconnecting passageways and the myriad of unused rooms that were scattered about. Despite his size, Berserker certainly knew how to be elusive at times.
Still, it appeared that luck was not on his side. With a devious giggle, Ilya followed the lingering trace of the prana pathway that connected the two of them. Feeling herself likened to a great hunter tracking a prey, she bolted from door to door. His presence grew closer with each room crossed. A final twist of a door knob had her out on the balcony where his rigid form stood on the perch like a gargoyle.
The sight of him had Ilya stop for a second. In front of her was not the usual Berserker she knew. Though there were semblances, this man who was cornered on the side of the dining room seemed to have aged a good ten or more years within the span of a few nights.
Seemingly occupied with his thoughts, the giant hadn't noticed her approach. The setting and the sight of him in such a state invoked a wave of nostalgia that came rushing in. It was not often that she would see the figure of an adult so forlorn and driven to the corner.
She could only think of the one time she had.
In the world of pristine white, a family of three huddled close together in their best effort to brave the bitter cold. The frosted balcony they leaned on gave the perfect vantage of the snowy forest below. Squeezed besides her parents, a quivering sob could be heard from the child's lips.
It was only a natural reaction. Soon, her two most precious persons would walk away even further beyond the edge of the forest she could see on the distant horizon. It was a sentiment that they all shared, although the adults, through years of experience, were taught to be more adept at masking their emotions.
"Don't cry. I'll be back for you."
Turning back to face her, the man's gentle hand caressed her cheek. A gentle touch to wipe away the droplets of her tears.
"I'm not crying…"The child shook her head slightly, giving her best effort to withhold the sobs and overflowing tears.
A wry smile was shown on the man's face; just the usual small tug at the corner of his lips. Though at times a cause of annoyance, it was her usual stubbornness that made him feel at home.
"Be a strong girl, alright? Daddy will come back for you soon." Another female joined in to say her goodbye. A wide smile was plastered across her face to ease the pain of separation.
It was difficult to glean signs of sorrow from the man's stoic exterior and the woman's false cheerfulness, but the child knew. She simply chose not to voice out her observation.
In the castle of winter where even human hearts seemed to be left frozen, any scarce sources of familial warmth were something to be cherished. With nothing else left to say, they simply relished in each other's warmth and tenderness until the moment departure…
She shook her head to clear off the lingering sentiment. This was no time to be subsumed by the emotions of such a long distant past. She had an issue to address and she wasn't about to waste this opportunity.
"Berserker!"
Upon his name being called, the giant turned toward her in surprise, partly expecting her to be confined to the bedroom for days to come.
"Where were you?"
A few seconds passed with him failing to produce an answer, and she was not about to wait for him to make one before continuing her accusation.
"You weren't here last night…and the night before…and even the night before that." Her lips puckered and her cheeks puffed. Traces of her displeasure were evident and he had no proper excuse to thwart it. "…After I asked you to stay so many times. I really asked you so many times, you know?"
"I…" His voice faltered. Telling lies, even a partial one, was not something ingrained within his nature, but during that moment it was a necessary evil that he had to condone. "…I was scouting the perimeter for threat. It is all the more important to proceed with vigilance when you are vulnerable"
"It wouldn't hurt to drop by afterward…" Ilya sulked, still not completely convinced by his reasoning. Nevertheless, she seemed to have lost the heart to keep up the argument and ended in a quivering voice, "…I was really worried, you know…Really really worried…"
Berserker heaved a small sigh toward the direction that their conversation was heading. He was a pushed to a dead end, but an honest answer was not one that could be easily given. While it was not his intention, recounting his encounter with the phantom would merely generate more of her worry.
"I have no more to offer other than an apology." After a heavy sigh, Berserker finally conceded to the eventual stroke of honesty, not knowing how she would react to it.
The girl was quick to anger, almost dangerously so. Her forgiveness was rarely earned in so short a time and often with string attached. That much would be apparent just from the grudge she bore toward her brother. That was not the case with him, however.
Turning away, she stopped short for a moment. A stream of complaints and tantrums was held back. A brief moment of recalling yesterday's regret had her face momentarily lose the traces of anger, as she mumbled softly.
"…Well, it's fine. I forgive you."
"Are you certain?" The three words she had said struck Berserker as a surprise, even if they did ease the frown on his face.
Despite her faults, there were certain sides of Ilya that she would only show toward him. Some were endearing, the others could turn out to be annoyances at times. Today seemed to one of those days that she feels exceedingly generous.
"I said I forgive you and that's that. Why don't you just be happy and accept it?" Spinning on her heels, a carefree smile touched Ilya's face as she turned to face him.
As if in response, he let out a chuckle and his right hand was spurred forward by her usual cheerfulness. It stretched forward, extending above her head, but it moved no further, admittedly a poor gesture on his part.
"Berserker…" Ilya warned. Her eyes narrowed in annoyance.
But it was not her sharp glare that had him rooted to the spot. A lingering trace of fear and uncertainty was what slowed his hand to a standstill.
"My bad." Against the increasingly grim premonition, Berserker quickly retreated behind his facade and replied with an even tone. His hand swiftly retracted to his side as to not attract anymore of her displeased glare.
Ilya was never fond of having her head caressed, not by him and much less so by anyone else. She regarded it an embarrassment to be indulging herself in such a childish gesture. She desired no less than the others, to be treated like an adult and, needless to say, she loathed reliance on the adult presences in her life.
Her appearance and her fits of temper, however, made it unlikely for others to treat her as such, never knowing that a small caress here and a whisper there would only incite her rage.
A long time had passed since she was a child whose goal was merely to demand affection and attention. The sensation of his hand might have lingered, and added to her loneliness for years to come, but she had already overcame that childish fault. Now it would only be fitting to regard her as an adult, one that could make her own decision without being reliant on anyone else, although that was not to say she wouldn't indulge herself in taking Berserker along.
Her confidence grew and her whimsical side kicked in to render the earlier displeasure all but forgotten in mere moments. With a dear lesson learned from the few days spent without him, Ilya knew better than to prolong her sulking and soon reverted to her usual cheerful self.
"Why don't you take me to the city, Berserker? I'm bored to death after staying in the bedroom for so long."
He accompanied her once. There was no reason to doubt that he would do so again.
"Why can't I come with you…?" The child sulked, repeating the question that had been answered many times before. It was not an answer that she sought but sympathy.
Seeing through her intentions, the man let out a chuckle and gave one last endearing rub on the crown of her head. Then it was time for the couple to set out into the bitter cold and wilderness.
Her heart, still filled with childish innocence, found no reason to doubt the complexity of an adult's mind, especially of those that she loved. Though pained from their departure, her trust in them was unwavering. The small perch on the balcony gave her a full view of them as they left the vicinity of the castle.
With slow trudging steps, they plowed through the field of snow into the vehicle ahead that would whisk them further away than she could imagine, only stopping once to give her a cheerful wave.
Never once did she suspect that it would be the last…
The last of that gentle hand…
The last of that dazzling smile…
The last time she had ever feel the joy of a true family.
Years passed and her heart gradually became closed, waiting and waiting for the two presences that filled her with the warmth that could thaw her frozen soul.
To eternity if need be, the child convinced herself to continue waiting…
But he shattered her childish delusion with no more than a stern shake of his head.
"That will not do. My duty is to secure the perimeter. It is best that we avoid unnecessary risk." Tension erased the usual gentle tone from his voice, one that he adopted when conversing with Ilya.
The phantom remained at rest for now and the lack of its presence allowed his lungs to be filled with breath of relief. Still, should he linger with her, he was certain that it would soon appear.
"Take more rest. You're still recovering." Berserker shook his head wearily as if to get rid of the lingering apprehension. It might be better for them both if he would just retreat out of sight for the time being. Wasting no time to make up his mind, Berserker extracted himself from the scene with, before it would deem any more of her warning to be necessary.
Ilya, however, did not seem to be sharing his opinion, and his reluctance to remain in her presence didn't go unnoticed.
"Are you avoiding me?" Ilya stepped in to block his path. Always the type to be upfront with her grievances, she wasted no time in confronting him about the matter.
"I am merely doing my duty…" Apparently not in any mindset to be prolonging the conversation, Berserker simply lifted her dainty form away from his path
"Berserker…what's wrong?" Sensing his tension, Ilya voiced out her concern.
"Nothing is wrong. Just rest for today. It would not do for you to fall in any future battle. " With a firm intonation in his voice, Berserker silenced all of her incoming protests. Although the girl was clearly left displeased, he steeled himself and promptly left without so much as a gaze backward.
As quickly as it had disappeared moments earlier, Ilya regained the pout on her face. More than a little irked by his avoidance, her temper flared. While there was no fault with his reasoning, the unusual restlessness gave it away to her that something was indeed amiss.
Alas, she was no longer in any mindset to be finding out.
"Fine! I won't ask you then!" Screaming at the now empty hallway, Ilya stomped into her room.
She was no longer the child she once was. She was no longer powerless and reliant upon the presence of an adult. In this war, she stood as an individual magus, fully capable of accomplishing many feats on her own.
"Liars…All of them." Mumbling bitterly, she took another backward look at the doorway in which he'd just disappeared with a scornful gaze.
Anger fed the flame of her determination and lessened her worry. A newly hatched scheme was pieced together in her mind, perfected during the time she spent confined under the blanket and soon to be ready to be put to work. It was a plan of exceeding importance for her such that she would not allow his absence be a deterrence.
"I won't wait for you this time…"
With or without him, she would succeed.