She thought her life was over – but fate gave her another chance, in a world of magic. Now, running around Hogwarts with James Potter and his friends, she's about to make choices that will change the future in ways she never thought possible…

Marauder's Phase

CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR

Protective Is What I Feel Above All Else

Remus and I couldn't look at each other for the rest of the week. Every time our eyes met, we would both turn pink and have to look away quickly.

If Sirius ever found out…

I felt so guilty it was tearing my insides apart, like a hungry Thestral.

But, at the same time…oh God, it just felt so right, to love them both this way! I can't explain it, I have no idea why.

I just knew that I couldn't let either of them go.

I had taken to writing a diary about all this, which was protected with the world's strongest spell.

On the night of the full-moon, I was lounging in the common room, sitting on the window-seat, and watching as Madam Pomfrey lead Remus across the grounds.

"Remus…" I whispered, somewhat dreamily, as I watched him disappear into the mouth of the Whomping Willow. I wanted to be with him, right now, more than ever, but not for the reason that most people would just assume. I sighed. I'd decided that, like last time, I wanted to be with him when he transformed. I couldn't explain why, I just felt like I had to be with him when he was going through all that pain…it must be horrible.

It was like I could feel every single rip and tear in my very own muscles.

I stood up, and looked around the common room. I didn't see Sirius anywhere…come to think of it, I hadn't seen him all afternoon. I wondered where he could've gone to but, now, I realised that I could get out of the common room without him following me, and I left, acting like I was going to the bathroom. Then I left the castle, treading familiar passages and being careful not to run into anybody, like Peeves or Filch.

I left the castle and followed my senses in the growing darkness to the Whomping Willow, which was in full swing. I prodded the knot with a very long stick, and the tree stopped fighting.

I glanced around me, snuck into the tunnel and then transformed, not wanting anybody to see me. I followed the familiar pathway all the way up to the Shrieking Shack, and there, at the room where he always was, was Remus, howling in pain, in mid-transformation.

With a small yelp, I rushed to his side, pushing my shoulder up against him as the pain rippled through his body, my howls suddenly joined in with his pain, and we howled together into the night as his transformation was complete, and he sank to the floor, seemingly defeated by what he had become.

I stood over him, and nuzzled my nose against his neck, licking his muzzle, telling him that it would be alright. That I was here.

I planned to always be.

Remus looked up at me with his werewolf eyes.

I can't really explain what they look like, except just to say that they are blood red. But…Remus still shone through in them, as I had told him time and again and would continue to do so.

I stared back at him with my yellow eyes, willing him to understand.

He uttered a sigh.

I cocked my head to one side, as I so often did when I was a human, and then I licked him, right on the nose.

He jumped, startled, and I gave him a wolfish grin, wagging my crescent tail.

He nodded at me.

Then, a sound made us both stop.

It was a human sound, and Remus' eyes immediately turned blood redder.

"What the hell…how far is this blood staircase?"

I froze, rigid where I stood by Remus' side. Severus Snape!? Oh no…oh no! This must be the night that Sirius played that trick on him…

How could he..? Did he not understand..? I glanced quickly at Remus, whose teeth were bared. If he lost control of himself, if he attacked Snape here…would I be able to protect what was important?

Where was James anyway?

And then…suddenly, I remembered.

Lily had asked James to study with her in the library tonight…all because I had convinced her to do it.

James wouldn't come, he didn't know…

Snape was almost to the room, and Remus' werewolf instincts were taking effect. I could see it in his eyes.

Blood lust.

I closed my eyes briefly for a moment, contemplating, and then I opened them again.

I sprang.

I leapt through the door to come face-to-face with Severus Snape, who was coming in.

Over my shoulder, I saw his eyes widen at the sight of a fully grown werewolf. My insides curled and my heart leapt fiercely and protectively – I would not let anything bad happen to Remus now!

I didn't care about Snape- all I cared about was Remus, and protecting him.

With a snarl, I sank my teeth into Snape's forearm, exactly where his Death Eater mark would one day be, and pushed him back, away from Remus' terrifying screams, back outside.

With each growl I glared into Snape's eyes, conveying a message of pure hatred and anger. 'Come near my Remus again', I thought, as I pushed him out and into the open, and he staggered back a few paces to land on the grass as I finally let go of him. 'And I'll kill you.'

I watched as Snape ran off, clutching his arm which was bleeding very, very badly. I may have bitten him a little bit harder than was necessary.

Behind me, I could hear Remus' howls, and so I pushed the knot on the tree with my nose to bring the tree to life again, and then headed back down there to get Remus under control, again.

I could handle Remus without hurting him, no sweat.

But Sirius…

I was absolutely going to annihilate him tomorrow.