Chapter 13

Sofia went over to her car; her tears began to flow as she closed the door. Her trembling hands started the ignition, and she pulled out of the parking lot.

– She needed to go… Anywhere… But here -

She drove aimlessly around Vegas. Stopping at a red light she realized that she wasn't even sure about where she was. Sofia decided at that point, it probably wasn't safe for her to be driving, considering she couldn't remember anything about the drive so far. She needed to get out of the car for a while.

Sofia drove for a while longer, finding herself at Lake Mead. She exited the car and started walking, where didn't matter. - She just needed to be alone, she needed to think, she needed… She wasn't really sure about what she needed anymore… -

She sat down on a rock, the breeze had slightly picked up she shivered against the wind that was a little chilly. Sofia wrapped her arms around her knees and stared at the horizon behind her sunglasses, the wind gently whipping her hair around her face. Her head drooped, her chin resting on her knees still held by her arms.

Tears started flowing again, she felt like something heavy had been placed on her chest, making it hard to breathe. She wanted to scream all of her frustration,-her powerlessness, -the hurt out, making it all go away, but she knew she couldn't, all the creaming in the world couldn't make these feelings go away..!

Sofia ran a cold hand through her hair and glanced at her watch, she'd been sitting on a hard cold rock for over two hours no wonder she was numb.

She got up and started walking towards her car; she knew what she had to do. Matt was right, it was about time stopping being such a coward, and start doing what was right for her, even if it meant disappointing other people!

Sofia drove back to headquarters and went into her office, a folded piece of paper was lying on her desk she picked it up and read it.

Sofia

To fear love, is to fear life…

And those, who fear life, are already three parts dead-

S

Sofia couldn't help but smile, she's right Sofia thought, with a newfound determination, she picked up her phone and called her mother.

"Mom its Sofia, I need to talk to you… no, tonight… no, my place around seven… yeah, see you then bye."

Sofia drove home, took a shower and went to kitchen to grab a beer. She really needed something to calm her nerves, she knew it was time to confront her mother, but boy was she nervous.

She had no idea about how her mother was going to react. Halfway through her second beer the doorbell rang, Sofia took a deep breath. "Well, here we go," she said out loud and went to open the door.

"Hello Sofia" Dana said as the door opened.

"Hello mom, come on in."

Dana walked in and sat on the couch.

"Can I get you anything, a beer, coffee?"

"No thanks sweetie, I'm fine, so what is it you want to talk to me about?"

Sofia was standing back towards her mother looking out the window. "Mom… I have something I need to tell you, and I don't think you're going to like it. I know you have hope and dreams for me, and I really wished I could fulfill them but I can't! I need to do what's right for me…" Sofia had started pacing around the living room. "I can't keep living on a lie…" Sofia stopped pacing took a deep breath and looked at her mother. "Mom I'm gay..!"

The room turned dead silent, after what for Sofia felt like an eternity, her mother finally spoke.

"Sofia please come over here and sits down, all that running around is starting to make me dizzy."

Sofia did as asked.

"You're right, this is not what I have hoped for you, and I can't say I'm thrilled about it. But seeing you as heartbroken and unhappy as you have been for the last couple of months haven't been fun either. I would be lying if I say I understand it. Not to mention, that your life is going to be so much harder from now on, not only at work/career but also generally speaking. But it's your live Sofia, I can't tell you how to live it, and if that means you're gay, then I guess I'll just have to learn to live with what."

Sofia turned on the couch and hugged her mother. "Thanks that mean a lot to me, I was so afraid you wouldn't have anything to do with me after I told you" she admitted.

"Sofia, you're my daughter, no matter what you do, I will always be there for you. Soo… Want to tell me who she is?" Dana asked with a mischievously smile.

"What is it with you and Matt, assuming that there is someone?" Sofia replied suspiciously.

Dana just rolled her eyes, "fine, so you won't tell me, well it doesn't really matter, I already know who it is!" Dana smirked.

"What..? How..? What..?" Sofia stuttered surprised.

Dana started laughing. "Ooh, so there is someone?"

Sofia's face was fiery. "Mom…" she groaned.

"Yeah… yeah… I should mind my own business, but I won't," Dana replied gravely, mollifying her statement with a grin. "Have you told Sara yet, how you feel about her?"

Sofia who in that exact moment had her mouth filled with beer almost suffocated, after some long minutes with cough and troublesome breathing, she finally was able to speak.

"How did you know? I mean…" Sofia sighed resigned. "How did you know?"

Dana raised an eyebrow; "You do know I'm a Detective… right?"

"No mother, actually I thought you were a Captain," Sofia smirked.

"Ha ha, well, that day in Brass office suddenly make much more sense. The fact that you started falling apart the day she left. Oh, and if that's not enough, I guess the way you reacted just now confirms it." Dana offered teasingly, turning in her seat to smile at her daughter. "So have you talked to her?"

Sofia's eyebrow rose at the joking tone. "Kind of, she knows I have feelings for her that's more than friendly, but I also told her that I couldn't act on them." Tears were in Sofia's eyes, "mom, I don't think she is coming back again… I really screw up big time!" The blonde sniffed.

Dana watched her with open curiosity, "and what about her, does she have feelings for you, or is that why she left?"

Sofia got up and went over to the shelter, she found Sara's letter and showed it to her mother. While Dana was reading the letter, Sofia went to the kitchen and made some coffee, and then went back to couch.

"Well," Dana said looking up from the letter. "It sure sounds like she's in love with you, do you love her?"

"I don't know if I love her, I don't think I know her well enough for that, but I am in love with her, and I don't know what to do?" Sofia said despairing.

"This maybe sounds crazy, but have you thought about going after her?"

Sofia looked in disbelieve at her mother. "Uh… No I haven't!" Closing her eyes resignedly, she leaned back in the seat.

"Well maybe you should, if she isn't coming back, but you want to be with her," Dana withdrew on the shoulders. "What is the alternative? Just remember to call me before you leave."

"Before I leave," Sofia responded softly, "but if I do, I will."

Dana put her cup down on the table and looked at her watch. "It's getting late Sofia, and I have a meeting early tomorrow, so I think I'll better start heading home, will you be alright?"

"I'll be fine mom, and thanks for coming, and for being so cool about everything!"

"You're welcome sweetie, talk to you soon," Dana said hugging her daughter.

"Yes you will, drive safely!"

When Dana reached her car she turned towards her daughter. "Oh, one thing Sofia, I can live with almost everything but…" She paused… "Don'tyou ever jump on Sara's bike if she is driving, that, I will never forgive you…"

Sofia was still laughing, when she closed the door.

Sara was starting to get worried, it had been twelve days since she had returned from Vegas, and except for the first two days, she hadn't been able to get in contact with Greg. He hadn't written back on her emails, and he hadn't answered any of the voicemails she had left on his phone. She picked up her phone and called Nick, knowing, him and Greg was pretty close.

"Hey Nick its Sara."

"Hey Sara, good to hear from you, how are you doing?" Nick asked warmly.

"I'm fine Nick, a little bored; I can't get use to not working." Sara replied with a chortled.

Nick was grinning, "Bet you can't, but you can always come back we have more than enough work!"

Sara laughed, "Getting in your way and steal your work? Nah, I can't do that to you, you know I like you to much," she smirked.

"With all the crime these days, trust me, I can learn to share pretty fast! But it doesn't sound like I'm going to persuade to come back. So, what's up?"

Sara voice turned seriously, "Greg is, he doesn't return my calls do you know if he's alright?"

Nick frowned a little, "I'm not sure, he has come back to work, but we can't get him to go out in the field, he won't leave the lab which is starting to drive Hodges nuts!"

Sara was quiet for a moment. "Nick, do you think you can get him on the phone for me?"

"Sure, hang on, I think his in the break room" Nick answered walking towards the break room.

"It's for you," Nick said handing the phone to Greg.

"Hello, this is Greg."

"Hello Greg it's Sara, you're not the easiest guy getting a hold on, been out dancing a lot lately?" She said trying to keep her tone light.

"No I haven't, and I'm sorry I haven't answered any of your mails, it's just I didn't know what to say!" Greg apologized.

"It's okay Greg, you just had me worried. How are you holding up?"

Greg's smile faded at her words, "I don't know Sara; I miss you, it's not the same without you!"

Sara pursed her lips thoughtfully then an idea hopped into her head. "Do you still have any vacation days left Greg?"

"Yeah, I think I have a week, why?"

"I was wondering if you would like to come and spend a week with me here in Frisco. You see, I miss hanging out with you too."

"Yeah, really..? You mean it?" Greg asked his voice sounding all childish.

"Yes, I mean it Greg," Sara laughed. "Why don't you go talk to Grissom? Then call me back and tell when you'll be coming" she coaxed softly.

"Okay, I'll call you back later today" he promised.

"Fine talk to you later then. Say hey to the others for me, will you?"

"Sure, later Sara."

"Later Greg."

Two days before Greg was coming to visit Sara he called her.

"Sidle speaking."

"Hey Sara, its Greg."

"Hey Greg what's up, you're not cancels on me are you?" Sara prompted after a moment.

"No, but I was wondering if you would mind, if I brought a friend along. Uh, well if you have enough room, for that? Or we can stay in a motel."

"My, my, have you been holding out on me Greggo?" Sara felt a smile coming on.

"No Sara," Greg moaned, "it's just a friend, you know you're the only one for me!"

"Yeah right Greg, so what? We just forget all you're dates?" Sara teased laughing.

"No, I just need all the practice I can get until you finally come around," Greg smirked.

Sara just snorted and rolled her eyes, "Sure, you can bring a friend, and you don't have to stay on a motel, I think I can make room for two visitors."

"Okay, see you in a few" Greg stated enthusiastically.

"Yeah, see you Greg" Sara snickered.

Tbc…