PART 5: Going home… Or back..!

Chapter 19

Sara finally went back to Vegas; Sofia picked her up at the airport and drove her home, before she had to go to work.

Sara used the evening to clean up her apartment, and went shopping to fill up her refrigerator. She went to bed but got up again, she just couldn't get use to the bed, so she ended up sleeping on the sofa.

Sofia came by when her shift ended, and they used the morning talking about how to make their relationship work. They knew they were not prepared to live together just yet, so they exchanged keys and settled on a simple routine – whoever left the lab first went to their respective home, and the other showed up when they got off work. That way they would be together, but still have the freedom to be alone if they needed too.

They talked about telling their co-worker but decided not to, not that they were ashamed or expected any problems about their relationship, but because they like the idea of having it for themselves.

The CSI team was happy to have Sara back, even Catherine had to admit, that with Sara's return the team once again was whole, and soon everything went back to normal.

The first time Sara delivered evidence to Hodges, she was filled in on all the lab gossip, not that it interested her well except for one rumor. After she left Hodges she went searching for Greg, she found him in the break room drinking coffee.

"Hello Greggo, my man!" Sara exclaimed lightly.

Something in Sara's voice made Greg look up, "hello Sara."

"Some interesting things I hear." Sara said, her eyebrow going up slightly.

Greg gave her a forced smile. "Yeah, and what would what be?"

Keeping her humor in check, Sara went over and got a bottle of water from the fridge. "That you have been messing around with my girlfriend."

Greg's cheeks went red, "yeah… like she would ever be interested."

"I should hope, not!" She said, enjoying the startled look from Greg.

"Come on Sara, people started talking when she went to Frisco with me that's not my fault."

Sara was having a hard time not laughing, "And of course you did anything to stop the rumor, right?" She said, raising her eyebrows dramatically as she looked at him.

"Uh…" Greg swallowed, "maybe not as much as I could have."

Sara finally started laughing, "Its okay Greg."

Greg exhaled, "shouldn't Sofia have been the one to stop the rumor?"

"What rumor?" Sofia asked walking through the door.

"That you are dating, Greg" Sara ventured with a smirk.

"I am?" Sofia look confused, "since when?" She replied giving Sara a sharp look at her reply.

"Well my dear, since you went on vacation with him" Sara said with a friendly smile.

"Oh… Did you know, Greg?" Sofia said in disbelief.

Greg gave her a puzzled look before he started chuckling softly. "Yeah, I heard it when I got back from Frisco."

"Well, guess I better leave you two love birds to each other," Sara chuckled walking out the door.

Sofia just looked after her, Greg's face just turned even redder.

"Think I'm getting out of here before people starts talking even more," Sofia said walking out the door.

Things were going pretty fine, Sara and Sofia's arrangement was working fine they more or less spent all their off time together. But now and then Sofia was getting a little frustrated about their sex life. Sara was still holding back, and Sofia didn't have a clue about why, she knew what Sara had said but she still needed a why.

One night when they were off, she finally gathered her courage and confronted Sara. At first the brunette tried to avoid the subject, but Sofia didn't let go she needed some answers. Sara knew she owed it to Sofia to answer her questions; it just wasn't that easy, her childhood wasn't a thing she liked talking about but she did. She didn't go into the deep dark horror, but told enough to hope that Sofia would accept and understand, why she couldn't go down that path.

Sofia listened and a lot of things suddenly made sense to her, but most of it was work related. She still couldn't understand how the sweetest gentle person in the world, ever could look at herself and think that she could ever be violent towards another human being. But no matter how much she tried, she couldn't get through to Sara and convince her otherwise.

The team was sitting in the break room, waiting for Grissom to show up with the night's assignments, he came in but didn't sit down.

"We only have one case tonight, a foster home gone badly; seven dead children; Brass and Curtis are already there so let's go."

As the cars pulled up, everyone got the feeling that this was going to be really bad. As they ducked under the tape, they could feel it in the air. Death and destruction turning stomachs and bringing tears to even the most jaded police officer, no one could have prepared the team for the sight that met them it was a pure slaughterhouse. Grissom looked around.

"Okay, Warrick and Greg, you two take the outside the rest inside."

For the first time a CSI member asked to be exempt from the scene, Nick simply couldn't handle it, he would work the evidence in the lab but that would be it.

Tears was in Catherine's eyes, all she wanted to do was run to her daughter and hug her, the sight of so many young people laying lifeless, had brought tears to her eyes and she didn't bother to wipe them away.

For the first time since he was a rookie, Brass throw up, and stayed outside the rest of the night, he thought he'd seen it all but he was wrong.

Grissom was not shaken by many things, but seeing this house made him sick. He could feel a migraine growing, he was holding it together, but his eyes gave him away, they were filled with sorrow and hurt for the kids.

It was beyond Sofia's comprehension what had happened, she was devastated, she just stood, couldn't believe what her eyes was showing her. A human couldn't have done that! Sofia's so normally clear deep blue sea eyes was frozen. She wanted so badly to get out of there but her body wouldn't move it wasn't until Sara took her arm and guide her she was able to go outside.

When Greg saw Sara bringing Sofia outside he knew it was bad, he just thanked god that he didn't had to go inside, he went over and wrapped his arm around Sofia knowing that Sara had to go inside again.

Warrick was divided, parts of him wanted to be inside helping collecting evidence, but the faces of those how had been inside, told him he was lucky to be on the outside.

And Sara, the one everyone expected to fall apart, was actually the one who kept the hold thing together, when she walked through the front door a smell of iron greeted her. The sight as she walked further into the house, all too familiar. Empty bottles and full ashtrays, the smell of alcohol and cigarette smoke in the air. An old feeling rushed back and hit her like a fist to the jaw; she shook herself, now was not the time to go down memory lane.

They all stood in the living room, just trying to adapt to the sight in front of them. Blood spattered walls, the furniture were spattered with scarlet red blood, young blood just too young. Seven bodies lying around the room, it was a horrifying sight, kids with their whole lives ahead of them, just lying there lifeless.

Sara's hands clenched into fists, her mouth set in a thin hard line, it was a god-awful mess but they had to work it. When Grissom didn't do anything Sara took over and got everyone started working.

Grissom was dusting for prints, Willows was gathering blood samples, David was working on the bodies, and Sara was taking pictures, first at the room before moving from body to body taking notes and some more pictures.

David had managed to make a time line in what order the kids had been killed. David looked at Sara as she knelt down beside him.

David's lips were parted with dismay, "Hey, Sara."

"Hey David, can you tell me anything?"

David shot her a wry look. "They have fresh bruises on their back and chest areas. They all have tape around their wrists and ankles. I think they all were beaten to death, but I can't tell you more before I get them back to the morgue."

Without looking up, Sara spoke. "Okay David, thanks, I'll come by later."

"See you then" David replied softly.

David left with the bodies. When Willows was done with the samples, Grissom let her go back to the lab knowing she wouldn't be worth much in the house. He and Sara went on processing the house.

Sara went back to the wall with the camera, something had caught her eye, she looked for a while before it finally hit her what it was she was looking at. It was a body impression of a child; someone had thrown at least one child up against the wall.

She left the living room and walked down the hall to look at the kids rooms. There wasn't much to look at, some mattress on the floors and not much else. She took some samples from the mattress, already knowing they would be positive for semen's.

She walked back towards the living room but stopped as she reached the hall closet; a padlock was hanging on the door and she knew all too well what it meant. Sara felt the bile rise in her stomach, she knew without opening the door what lay behind the scarred door of the hallway closet. She shouldn't know what to expect, but she did. She met with Grissom in the living room; he gazed at her with concerned eyes.

"Are you okay, Sara?"

Sara hung her head, giving it an aggravated shake. "No, I'm not Griss, and neither are you, how could anyone be with a case like this?"

Grissom sighed, "You're right, are you ready to go back to the lab?"

"Yeah, let's get out of here." Sara answered, without looking up at him.

When they came back to the lab Sara went straight to the morgue where Doc Robbins was waiting for her.

"Hey Sara, how are you doing?" Robbins said in a concerned tone.

"Hey Doc," Sara shrugged her shoulders, "I've been better," she told him, "Have you looked at them?"

"Yes, let's go over them. All of them have signs of long time abuse, several healed broken bones, bruises on their fronts and backs. This one, Doc brought Sara over to a little five year old boy. Looks like he deliberately and with big force, have been thrown into a wall.

"Yeah, I saw the impression on the wall" Sara said, trying to keep her voice calm.

"They all have been exposed for starvation, and there are also signs of repeated sexual molestation. Rape..!"

Sara closed her eyes for a moment; "these kids lived through hell, they were kept in a line of fear and fists" she said, sighing in defeat.

Doc looked at her but didn't say anything, something in her voice told him not to. "All of them were taped up, but I don't know why?"

"Probably so they couldn't get away, while he was killing them one by one." Sara sighed. Well, thanks Doc, see you later."

"Yeah, hope you find the one who did this" he said, giving her a kind smile.

Sara looked back over her shoulder, "yeah, me too."

After leaving the morgue Sara went outside, she just needed a moment alone, she was so angry; she took a deep breath of cool air before lighting up a smoke. She felt sick, but she knew she couldn't make this case personally, because if she did this would be the case that would break her down.

After cooling down she went back inside; there was still a lot of work to do. She was in need of some coffee so she went to the break room, Greg and Sofia was sitting on the sofa, when Greg saw Sara his eyes screamed for help. Sofia looked totally lost for the world.

Greg got up and Sara took his seat. She pulled Sofia onto her lap and wrapped her arms around her; she couldn't care if anyone walked in and saw them all that matters were her girlfriend. Sofia nestled into Sara's embrace and rested her head on the brunettes shoulder. Sara gently let her hand stroke the soft blonde hair; they were just sitting like that for a while.

Sara finally whispered, "Sof, you need to go home, I'll get Greg to drive you."

"No Sara, please I don't want to be alone." Sofia pleaded.

"I'm sure Greg will love to stay with you." Sara said in a concerned voice.

"No, I want to stay here" she finally said in a voice so quiet she barely heard her.

Sara lifted Sofia's head and looked, into her eyes. "Okay sweetie, but I have some things I need to do before we can go, but Greg will stay with you until I get back, okay?"

Sofia just nodded.

Sara gave her a sweet kiss before she got up; Greg went back to the sofa and sat down. He put his arm around Sofia; she placed her head on his shoulder but didn't say anything. She didn't own words to describe what she had seen this night.

Sara worked for a couple of hours with the evidence and talked to her co-worker about their findings, but she finally reached the end of what more she could do, so she decided it was time to go home. She went back to the break room to pick Sofia up.

Sara took Sofia's hand, "C'mon honey time to go home."

Sofia stood and followed Sara, never letting go of her hand. They didn't talk on the drive home. Sofia just looked out the window.

They entered the door to Sofia's condo. Sara was half way towards the den before she realized that Sofia wasn't behind her. She turned around and saw Sofia leaning up against the door, tears running down her cheeks. Sara walked back to her.

Sara gave her a concerned look, "Sof hon?"

Sofia looked into her lovers eyes. "Sara, please make me forget make me feel again!" Her voice was so low Sara could barely hear her.

Sara swallowed hard; they both knew what Sofia was asking. Sara looked into Sofia's eyes and her brain just shut down when her lips crashed down on her lovers, her body was working on pure instinct, at this point she needed and wanted it as much as Sofia did.

So caught up in each other, they didn't even knew how they ended up in the bedroom. Hunger and desires was in their breath, both of them focusing on just how good it felt to be so intimately attached.

They didn't talk didn't need it, both knew what they wanted. Right now they were just two people in love fighting for survival. It wasn't about love making that could come later. It was about devouring each other, and there would be no holding back. Both desperately needed, -to escape from a world capable of producing so much evil, -to block out everything but each other, to escape into each other far away from a world neither of them could handle right now.

Both were crying the first time they went over the edge. They screamed their pleasure out loud; releasing the horror and pain, there was bottled up inside of them. It was rough and it was raw, they were ripping their hurt, the pain, out of each other's bodies, it was what they needed to feel alive.

They fucked each other hard, and they liked it, needed it, there was scratching and biting, too hard to feel good too soft to be pain, but just the right pressure for marking putting down their ownership on each other's skin.

Every single muscle in their bodies was screaming and begging them to stop, but they didn't, they weren't done they still needed and wanted more, bodies still craving for release. It was about giving and taking, they needed each other more than neither one of them ever thought possible. They didn't need to justify it; it was just the way it was. They were tearing themselves apart building each other up, both was crying several times just letting go of it all.

But not once, did they let go of each other! They protected each other as much as they served. Never letting the other one slip by and hit the bottom. When they finally collapsed and drifted into sleep, their bodies was so exhausted, that not even their sub-consciousness was able to produce any images of the night's event, they just drifted into an unconscious similar sleep.

They woke up at the same time. They locked eyes and both knew they were far from done, they still needed more, but this time would be different, it would be slow deep and intense.

Sara pulled Sofia on top of her, their eyes locked, and neither one of them would close them this time. They needed to see as much as to feel. It was love making on such a deep level, that it could only be done by two people emotionally attached, and truly in love with each other.

Each time they climaxed, they would scream each other's names out loud, but there would be no more pain left in their voices. When there was no more strength left in their bodies they drifted off to sleep again, Sofia still lying on top of her lover.

Sofia was the first to wake up. She tried to roll off her lover, but found that she couldn't, Sara arms was holding her so tight preventing her from falling off. It made Sofia smile and feel very safe!

Sara slowly woke up to the feeling of her girlfriend still lying on top of her, and it made her smile, she just loved the way her lover's body felt against her own. Sara opened her eyes and looked directly into clear blue eyes.

"Morning sweetie."

Sofia giggled, "I think we have to go for late afternoon."

Sara kissed her softly; "mmm… you're probably right."

Sofia pushed herself up to a sitting position; Sara almost stopped breathing when she saw all the marks on her lover's body.

"Shit Sofia, are you alright?"

"I'm fine" Sofia said, waving off her startled expression, her eyes roamed down Sara's body, "are you?"

Sara followed Sofia's eyes, "oh… whoa… Yeah, I'm fine" she offered reassuringly, "but I think showering is going to be interesting!"

Sofia started laughing, but she soon turned earnest again, she wanted to ask Sara a question, but didn't know how. But Sara could read her like an open book.

"It's okay Sof, you can ask, I don't want to have any secrets from you."

"You know, don't you?" Sofia asked lightly, but she remained concerned.

Sara took a deep breath, "yes, I know: I know about, -the beating, -and the pain that will follow, - about the starvation, not to be eating for several days. I know about, -the closet, to be locked in for days, not knowing if the world had forgotten all about me. I know about, -hospital visits, and the lies to cover up what was going on, and I know about, -the fear, not of those things, no, -fear of never knowing what was going to happen the next time. But unlike those poor kids I got out alive. But when a case like this comes along, my past comes right back to me as if it had happen only yesterday."

Sofia had silently listen and dried away the tears there was running down Sara's cheeks, she bent down and kissed her lover before she spoke.

"Sara, I think you're the most amazing person I have ever met, you have lived through hell and yet, you have managed to become this incredible woman who cares so much about other people. I don't care about your past, it's a part of you, and it's one of the reasons for who you have become today. You're smart, intelligence, stubborn as hell, passionately, and so damn sexy. Sofia hesitated for a brief moment, Sara Sidle, I love you! …Past and all!"

Sara stopped breathing she could not believe what she just, had heard. "Sofia you can't… I don't…

Sofia silent her with her hand, "Sara, I'm not going to leave you, I love you, and I want to spend my life with you. You don't have to say anything; I'm not going anywhere I can wait."

Sara did the only thing she could do, she kissed the hell out of her lover, pouring all her heart and soul into that one kiss, and Sofia understood.

"So, ready to get up and face the world?"

"Yeah, I think so." Sofia said happily.

It was two sore and well used bodies that crawled out of bed, but it was okay, they were both ready to go back to work.

As the team worked through the evidence, it became pretty clear, that the only one who could have killed the seven children, was the foster dad; the only problem was that the police couldn't find him.

Three days later the police did find him; he had shot himself with a shotgun out in the desert. So no matter how much they wanted some answers to what had gone wrong, they knew that they would never get them, which was frustrating but they had to let it go.

Tbc…