Chapter 20

Work went on, crime never seemed to be sleeping in Vegas, and so did Sara and Sofia's life, when it was possible they went out of town just to get away from it all.

Several of their co-workers had started to notice, that Sara almost never used her overtime anymore.

Warrick and Nick had talked about it and they knew something was going on, just not what, and none of them had the courage to ask Sara, they had tried Greg but he didn't seem to notice anything.

Grissom was handing out assignments, Sara was giving a case about a woman who had been brought into the hospital brutally beaten up and raped. Catherine closed her eyes; sometimes she really didn't understood Grissom's way of thinking. The rest of the team just held their breath.

Sara went to the hospital to talk to the woman, but she wouldn't say anything. That fact and that she was found only one street away from where she lived, told Sara what she needed to know. This was no random assaults, it was done by someone she knew, the woman refused to let Sara examine her, and there was no way she would let Sara go into her home.

When Sara left the hospital, she was frustrated and angry, she knew the boyfriend was behind it, but there was no way she could get to him unless the woman voluntary would report him to the police, and Sara knew what was never going to happen. The woman was simply too scared and broken down to ever do a thing like that.

Sara was pissed at the system for not allowing her to help a woman like her, a system that protected the criminal's rights more than the victims' rights. When she came back to the lab, everyone stayed as far away from her as possible.

Except for Grissom, he called her into his office; he wanted to have a talk with her, which turned out to be a very bad idea. It ended up in the biggest dispute; they had ever had yet. Sara told him what she thought he could go do to himself, and he ended up sending her home for three days. She left his office and slammed the door behind her and every other door she met on her way out of the lab.

Greg finally got in contact with Sofia and told her what had happened, she instantly called Sara, but she wasn't answering her phone. Sofia drove by both apartments, but only to find them both empty. Sara was nowhere to be found, and for the next thirty hours, no one saw or heard from her.

Greg was worried sick, Sofia was about to panic, she had called Brian to hear if Sara maybe had turned up in Frisco. But he hadn't seen or heard from her, but he had told Sofia not to worry, it wasn't the first time Sara had disappeared when she needed to think some things over. But Sofia couldn't stop thinking about all the bad things that could have happened to her girlfriend.

When Sara turned up again she went straight to the lab, she walked in a cool resolved way her steps was determined as she walked into Grissom's office, she threw a piece of paper on his desk and looked at him. "I'm done!" Was all she said before she left his office and drove home.

Grissom didn't need to look at the paper he knew what it was. Greg saw her as she pulled out of the parking lot; he picked up his phone and called Sofia. She went straight to her car and drove over to Sara's apartment and found Sara sitting on the couch staring out the window. Sofia couldn't help but being pissed, she didn't think she deserved to be treated that way.

"Sara, where the hell have you been? You had me worried sick" Sofia asked sharply, casting a hurt look at Sara.

Sara kept gazing out the window, "out thinking!"

"That's just fucking great, and you never thought about calling to let me know that you were alright?" Sofia said shortly, crossing her arms defiantly.

"I forgot my phone in the lab." Sara sighed after a moment's hesitation.

"Oh… And that of course," Sofia's voice was dripping with sarcasm, "justify, the fact, what you just shot me out of your life. Christ, do I really mean that little to you, Sara?"

Getting up, Sara walked around the couch and stood in front for Sofia, "please don't think that you mean everything to me. I love you Sofia, and I'm sor…"

"Sara, stop… what?" Sofia said, shaking her head in disbelief at the brunette's words.

Sara looked, into Sofia's eyes, "Sofia Curtis, I love you, with every beat of my heart!"

All the anger left Sofia, and the biggest smile showed up on her face, "yeah?"

"Yes!" Sara stated softly.

"I love you too, but don't you ever do a thing like that to me again."

"I won't, things just got out of hand, guess I didn't handle it very well." Sara admitted, twitching her lips slightly.

"No you didn't, Sara, we're a team, which means that no matter how rough things get, we always have each other to lean on instead of running away."

"Yeah, I know I'm just not use to having someone in my life that care," she said, nodding her head in earnest.

Sofia kissed her, "yeah well, you do now so please don't run away from me."

Sara encircled her arms around Sofia, "I won't," she said kissing her, "I promise."

Sofia leaned in and deepened the kiss, "okay, then I'll forgive you this time, but only because you love me."

That I do Sara gasped, "And if you keep kissing me like that, it will be with more than words!"

Sofia pressed her body harder up against her lovers, "I hope so," she groaned.

Clothes were disappearing as they kissed and fumbled towards the bedroom. Sofia was lying on her back, Sara was hovering over her kissing ever inch of her body. It was not that Sofia didn't enjoy it; she just wished that Sara would stop thinking.

"Sara, please stop holding back!" Sofia groused.

Sara kept kissing, "I'm not" she said dismissively.

"Yes, you are, I can hear your brain all the way up here" Sofia said softly, watching her carefully.

Sara stopped kissing and lay down beside her lover, "Sof, please!"

"No Sara, you know I love that genius brain of yours, but I really would wish that you kept it out of the bedroom."

Sara rolled onto her back and looked up at the ceiling; "can't you just let it go?"

"No, I can't and neither can you, sometimes it seems like you're so worried of doing something wrong, that you almost choose to do nothing."

Sofia paused to fix Sara with an intent stare. They held the pose for a moment, before Sara sighed in defeat. "It's just safer that way."

Sofia rolled onto her side and gazed at Sara, "maybe, but I don't want safe, I want the fire that burns deep down inside of you, I want the real you, the woman who brings me to places I didn't even knew existed, before I met you."

Sara blinked at the undisguised emotion in the blonde's voice and expression. "Sofia, why won't you understand why I can't do it?"

"Because, you haven't giving me a reason that makes sense."

Sara shortly looked at her in disbelieve, "you don't think my past is reason enough?" Sara darted her eyes to the side quickly. Sofia was watching her intently, her eyes dark with emotion.

"No, I don't Sara. I know you went through hell, and some of the things I can't even begin to imaging, but right now you're doing the thing you hate the most, you're letting your past controlling your life. You say that you don't want to be in control, but that's exactly what you are by denying the both of us what we truly want, you and you alone decides what goes and don't go in this room. Well, maybe you should think a bit about it, because there's one thing you can be damn sure about honey, I'm not letting this go."

Sofia got out of bed and put some clothes on; she went back to the bed and bent over Sara.

"I love you honey, all of you, and now I'm going to make dinner," she kissed her and left the room.

Sara just laid there not sure about what to think, Sofia had definitely opened her eyes for some things she never had realized before, there was no doubt about that Sofia was right about some of the things she had said, but… Sara shook her head; she didn't really know what to think about anything anymore. She got out of bed and took a shower, before joining Sofia in the kitchen.

"What are you making?"

"Just some pasta and vegetables, so for how long did Grissom sent you home?" Sofia said, smiling kindly at her.

"Three days, so I'm not going in tonight" Sara huffed out.

They sat down and started eating; Sara just poked her fork around her food.

"Sara, you're not eating, something wrong with it?"

Sara looked up, "no it's fine."

"So, why aren't you eating, then?"

Sara put her fork down, "I have something, I need to tell you."

Sofia stopped eating and gazed back at her, "what is it Sara?"

"Before I came home today I went by the lab I…" Sara began tentatively.

"What Sara? Just tell me."

Sara looked at her, "I turned in my resignation!"

"You did what, why?"

"I just can't do it anymore; I can't keep working for a system that's more concerned about the criminal's rights than the victim's." Sara answered stiffly.

Sofia leaned back in her chair; she couldn't claim that she was that surprised, Sara hadn't seemed happy at work for quite some time. Hell she hadn't seen her as happy in Vegas, as she had been in Frisco.

"Sara, are you sure about this?"

"Yes I am, I'm not happy going to work anymore." Sara said firmly, a facial muscle flinching before she took a calming breath. "In the beginning I thought it was because of you, that I would rather stay home with you than go to work," she smiled. "Well, I do like being home with you, but it wasn't only that, I just for a while now felt empty at work, it's like I have nothing more to give." She sighed, "I don't know if that make any sense to you, I just know I don't want it anymore."

"Sara, I do understand, and if you don't want to work as a CSI anymore that's fine with me, I just want you to be sure before you quit your job." Sofia said, smiling kindly.

"I am" Sara stated firmly.

"So, have you thought about what you want to work with then? I know economic you don't have to work, but I can't see Sidle not working."

"You don't?" Sara replied with a self-satisfied smirk. "Well, I'm not sure yet, almost anything else I guess."

Sofia pouted and half-closed her eyes, then she started giggling, "Nah Sara, I think you already know what you want to do" she said with a knowing smile.

"Do you now, please tell?" Sara said, winking at her.

Sofia gave her a sagacious nod, "I think you found the answer to that question in Frisco."

"Maybe you're right; it's actually one of the things I'd been thinking about" Sara offered with a smile.

Sofia looked at her watch, "well honey, I have to get out of here, or I'm going to be late at work."

"Yeah okay, say hey to Greg for me" Sara said warmly.

"Sure, see you in the morning," she said while kissing Sara.

"Mmm… Be careful to night."

"Always" Sofia raised an eyebrow in quiet confirmation, "sweet dreams."

"Yeah, like I'm going to sleep before you're back" Sara intoned dryly.

"Nay, probably not, but I do like waking you up" Sofia replied with a wry grin.

Sara giggled, "go woman, out now, or you are going to be very late!"

Sofia laughed, "Okay hon, see you later."

"Yeah, later sweetie."

Later that night Sara's phone rang, "Sidle."

"Hello, "crazy geek" so, your back in the land of the living."

"Hi Jodie, and what are you talking about?"

"I heard from Brian, that you had gone missing!"

"And how does he know?"

"I think Sofia called him, to hear if you had turned up here."

"I just took a trip out in the desert."

"Yeah… yeah.., One of your thinking trips, but next time please remember to tell Sofia before disappearing." Jodie pointed out, deliberately keeping her tone light.

"Yeah I know, but if that's why you're calling you're too late, we already talked about it."

"Good for you. So, how are things going in Vegas?"

"Just fine," Sara laughed, "I'd been sent home because of a bad temper, but Sof is working tonight."

Jodie sighed, "jeeze… Sara, don't they have any angry courses in Vegas, I really think you could use one" she said in a tone that mixed humor with an equal measure of exasperation.

"Nah… It won't be necessary; I just resigned from my job."

"What? You what? Come again, there is a very bad line here" Jodie exclaimed loudly.

Sara laughed, "You heard me, Jodie."

"No seriously why?"

"I just don't have what it takes anymore; maybe, I'm just burned out" Sara clarified.

"Well, it sounds like you have given it some thorough thoughts, trip to the desert, huh..?"

"Nope, I think I knew even before, it just cleared it up" Sara told her truthfully.

"So, how are you and Sofia? Sex life any good?"

"Jodie, I really don't think that's any of you business." Sara choked out.

Jodie's tone was laden with amusement, "So, still holding back, are we?"

"What the hell makes you think, that?" Sara snapped.

This just made Jodie laughing even more, "Because if you didn't, your answer to the question would have been, 'great'."

Right now Sara really hated the way Jodie always looked right through her, "look Jodie, we're fine, okay?"

"Oh, I don't doubt that Sara, I just don't understand, why you're willing to settle for fine, when you can have great, so what does Sofia think about it?"

Sara didn't answer.

Jodie chuckled, "oh… I bet she's on my side on this one."

"In a matter of fact yes she is, and I don't get it, I even told her about my past" Sara answered dryly.

"You don't! Sara, you don't have any idea of how intense you can be in bed, do you? You got this special gift, to make the one you're with, to forget everything and just get lost in the feeling of your touch." Jodie said, a little challengingly.

Sara grunted in frustration, working her fingers into a knot and back out again. "Bullshit Jodie, if that was the truth there wouldn't be any reason to pin them down."

Jodie breathed out a low, ironic laugh. "Christ Sara, please tell me, that you're not that fucking stupid you still haven't figured out that this has nothing to do with physics, it's a mentally game, hell Sara, you can walk into a room and just by your presence alone, make people feel like you have pinned them up against the wall."

Sara grimaced, trying to keep her emotions in check. "I don't think I have that kind of power over people."

"Then think again because you do, but against the sentence to many other people, you're just too sweet to ever use that power against them."

Sara was totally confused now, "Jodie, you lost me, I got the power to dominate people, but I'm too sweet to do it, and yet, at the same time you're yelling at me, and want me to be more dominating in the bedroom."

Jodie sighed, "Look Sara, I'm not going to use more of my time to talk to you about this. I really can't tell, if you're not getting it, or it's about you being too stubborn to admit it, and I really don't think I care anymore. At the end of the day it's between you and Sofia, I just hope, that she will be able to live with your decision, because if not, it will end up ruin your relationship. Whatever you like to hear it or not Sara, I think it's about time you get your head out off your ass, and start living your life with all it has to offer."

Sara didn't speak for awhile, "it's just not that easy Jodie, but I think I get what it is you're saying."

"I hope so, no reason to deny one the good things in live" Jodie smirked a little.

Sara laughed, "About that, why are you home tonight?"

"I'm not; I'm actually, on my way out of the door." Jodie returned her voice rich with amusement.

"Okay then, guess, I'll talk to you later, says hey to the gang for me, will you?"

"Sure, later Sara."

Sara was dozing off on the couch when her phone started ringing, "Sidle."

"Hey Sara, its Greg, hope I didn't wake you?" He asked, his voice soft, but carrying his seriousness.

"No, its okay, what's up?"

"It's Sofia" Greg said hesitantly.

Sara flew up from the couch, and her heart stopped beating, "Greg, what happened, is she alright?"

"Sara, calm down she's fine, nothing has happen to her she just lost her temper."

Sara's heart started beating again, "what do you mean lost her temper?" She said uneasily.

"Well, I wasn't there, but as Nick explained it, she got pretty rough towards the suspect they were picking up."

"How rough Greg?" Sara insisted.

"I don't know Sara, but he probably going to have some bruises tomorrow. Look he's not dying, and knowing Sofia he probably deserved it."

"Where is she now?" Sara pressed ahead.

"Brass have brought her in for a conversation, and if the rumor is true, she's going to have to face the undersheriff as well, but I don't know that much." Greg said darkly.

"It's okay Greg; it's not your fault."

"Yeah well, what is it with the two of you and temper these days, anyway? If I didn't know better I would think it was a way to get some free vacation" he replied flippantly.

"Yeah, right Greg, but don't tell anyone," Sara grinned, feeling some of the tension leave her body.

Greg chuckled, "I better get back to work, just thought you wanted to know."

"Yeah, thanks Greg, see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, later, Sidle" Greg said, disconnecting the line.

Tbc…