Casey walked into his house and saw his parents sitting at the kitchen table eating lunch. His words caught in his throat but after having returned from visiting Noah, he knew he had to help his friend. There was only one solution to Noah's nausea and he thought he knew what it was.
"Can I ask you something?" inquired Casey.
"Sure, honey." said Margo.
"As parents, not as lawyer and cop."
"Oh God, what is it Casey? Are you in trouble?" asked Margo.
"No, I'm not in any trouble." Casey rolled his eyes.
"Then what is it?" asked Tom.
"Before I get into that, just remember I didn't just go out and do it. I came to you first." Casey told his parents.
"Okay, just tell us," replied Margo.
"It's Noah. He's on chemotherapy and can't keep any food down…"
Tom and Margo knew what was coming next.
"Stop," Margo held up her hand. "Casey, you can't be caught with marijuana. Your parole will be revoked."
"But mom…"
"Your mom is right. You can't be caught with it," said Tom. "We are happy you talked to us first but you can't be involved."
"What is Noah supposed to do? He looks really bad."
"I'll go see Noah and talk to your grandfather after lunch," said Margo. "We will figure it out. Just stay out of it."
"Okay," sighed Casey.
They finished their lunch and Margo headed to the hospital to talk to her father-in-law.
-P-
"Can I see you for a minute in Noah's room," asked Margo.
"Sure." replied Bob.
When as they entered Noah's room, they saw him throwing up. As soon as Margo laid her eyes on Noah, she was shocked by how bad he looked.
"He's throwing up a lot?"
"We've given him just about everything we can try and nothing is helping him keep anything down."
"I talked to Casey over lunch. Hypothetically, what would you say if we could get him some, let's say, something that isn't medically given in this state. Would that help?" Margo gave the universal drag sign.
Bob laughed and understood what she was talking about. "Well, medically, we can't do that here but it has been known to work."
"Does he need to be here in the hospital?"
"He's only here because he's throwing up and we can keep an eye on him. If he does...and he stops throwing up, then he should be able to stay home until his next treatment."
"Good. I'll make some arrangements." Margo talked to Noah for a few minutes, then left the hospital and headed out to the Snyder farm.
-P-
Margo knocked on the Synders porch door. She could smell something delicious but that wasn't unusual for Emma's kitchen to have wondrous smells coming from it.
"Can I talk to you for a minute Emma?"
"Sure, what can I help you with?" Emma opened the door to let her in.
"I want to talk to you about that patch growing in the south field."
"I'm not sure what you mean?" Emma replied with a straight face.
"Let's cut to the chase. I've known about it for years. I know it's for Gladys' glaucoma. It's a small patch. We know you don't sell or use it, so we've let it go," said Margo.
"I still don't…"
Margo cut her off. "Casey talked to me about Noah. He needs some weed to get him over the sickness from chemotherapy. Nothing else is working. If he stays here, he can get some and it won't have to transported nor will there be a risk of anyone getting caught."
"Noah can stay here. I wanted him to but he said no," Emma was still playing dumb.
"Okay, I'll make arrangements with Bob...thanks." She turned around and walked out the door. "She missed her calling. She should've been an actress." she thought to herself.
-P-
All the arrangements were made. Noah was released from the hospital and traveled to the farm with Holden. When Noah got comfortable in a bedroom at the farm, he took a quick nap but woke up when he had to throw up. Emma heard him vomiting and walked into his room.
"How are you feeling, Noah?" asked Emma in a way only she could.
"I'm tired and sick of throwing up." complained Noah.
"We may have a fix for that." Emma pulled out what looked like cigarette.
"They've tried everything, but I keep throwing up."
"Yes, honey, but they didn't try this."
"A cigarette?"
"No, it's not a cigarette. It's marijuana."
Noah started to laugh. "Is that why I'm here, so you can get me high?"
"The medical use for marijuana is well documented. It should stop you from throwing up, so you can eat. You're getting way too skinny for my taste."
Noah smiled. "Let's light it up. I'm tired of throwing up."
"Good, because I made a good healthy supper for you and if you throw it up, I'll be hurt forever," giggled Emma.
Noah only laughed for a second before he felt sick to his stomach again.
"Come on, let's get you outside so you can smoke this and then you can have lunch with us. Oh and don't tell anyone, I mean anyone, about this." She glared her warning.
"I won't." He knew that glare meant death to those who ignored it.
Emma helped Noah down to a lounge chair she put in a secluded area close to the house.
"Now honey, do you know how to smoke a joint?"
Noah laughed. "Yes, Emma, I've smoked a joint before..." Emma gave him a questioning look. "Before I came to Oakdale." Emma seemed to relax.
"Then I'll leave you to it. Just call me if you need anything."
"You better start making some oatmeal raisin cookies," Noah giggled and Emma smiled back.
-P-
The marijuana worked. Noah was able to eat a full meal, plus a few cookies but he was exhausted. The meal was delicious but he was so tired from the chemotherapy that he couldn't do much other than eat, sleep or poop. He had been sleeping for about ten minutes when he heard his door open and felt a little body crawl into his bed.
"What's going on Ethan?" Noah yawned.
"Can I take a nap with you?" Ethan asked with a yawn.
"Sure, buddy," Noah smiled.
Ethan put his back towards Noah chest. Noah put an arm around Ethan and both drifted off to sleep.
About a half hour later Emma came up looking for Ethan. She found him and Noah taking a nap together. Noah was holding Ethan gently, in a hug, like a father would his child. She picked up the remote to Noah's camera and hit the record button. The view finder came on and she saw Noah and Ethan. She went into her bathroom and blew her nose and wiped away her tears. She quietly went back to Noah's room and hit stop on the remote.
-P-
A week later, Noah was back in the hospital undergoing more chemotherapy. Luke dropped by to talk to him. Unbeknownst to Luke, Reid had been trying to get in touch with him for a few hours. The only place left for Reid to search for Luke was in the hospital and that's when he found him sitting by Noah's bed. Luke felt someone's gaze on him and when he looked up, Reid waved him out into the hallway.
"What's wrong?" asked a weary Luke.
"I'm a close match for Noah's bone marrow," said Reid.
"That's great. We should tell Noah," Luke was excited.
"Wait."
"Wait? What do you mean Wait? What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
"You're not fooling me. What's wrong?"
"Do you have to be with him all the time?" It almost sounded like he was whining.
"I'm not..." Luke started to protest.
"Yes, you are. If you're not with him, you're call him or you're thinking about him."
"Are you jealous?"
"Don't treat me like I'm an idiot." Reid walked into Noah's room with Luke behind him.
Noah scowled when he saw Reid walk into his room. He was taping but he didn't shut off the camera.
"I'm not a perfect match but my marrow the closest so far," said Reid.
"No." Noah replied firmly.
"Okay." Reid tried to leave the room but Luke stopped him.
"Wait...what..." He looked at Reid.
"He said no, I'm not going to argue with him. If he wants to die, that's his business," Reid replied as he walked out of the room.
Trying to make sense of what just happened, Luke turned to face Noah. "This stubbornness of yours is one of the reasons why we broke up. Why can't you just accept the help?"
"Because, I grew up without it. I had nobody my whole life, Luke. We moved around all the time, I didn't have time to make friends and I had no family," said Noah. "But that has nothing to do with why I don't want his marrow. When I was nine a dog came up to the yard. I would play with it for hours after school and on the weekends but when my dad came home from maneuvers, that rotten bastard said 'I didn't tell you that you could get a dog.' He walked into the house and when he came back out, he had a gun. I begged him not to but he did anyway, he shot the dog in the head right in front of me. 'This will teach you to listen to me.' I was fucking nine years old. From that day, I closed my heart down and I didn't allow anyone to come near me until you Luke and look what he did to you. He shot you." Noah could barely say the last words though the tears running down his face.
"What does that have to do with Reid?"
Trying to calm down enough to talk, Noah raised his eyes to meet Luke's. "He's just like my father. He took away something I loved with all my heart. He did it on purpose, just like my father did."
"Noah, that's not what…" began Luke.
"Can we talk about his later? I'm getting really tired. I'd like to take a nap." He didn't want to cry again in front of Luke.
Luke could see that Noah was tired and in a lot of emotional pain so he decided to leave. He had just walked out the door when he heard Noah start to cry.
Noah was so drained of all his energy that he couldn't even think straight anymore and he didn't get a chance to shut off the video tape before he fell asleep. Luke walked back into the room to see how Noah was doing when he saw that he was a sleep. He walked up to Noah and started crying. He played with what was left of Noah's hair.
"Noah, I still love you," cried Luke. "I want so much to be with you but I'm afraid. I barely handled the last time you left me and if you did it again, I would never make it through. I know Reid won't leave. It's not what I want, I do love him but it's what I need, it's that special place in my heart will always be for you, Noah." Luke kissed Noah's hand and then walked out of the room.
Noah woke up, thinking a nurse was just in the room and realized that the camera was on. He shut it off and drifted back to sleep, unaware of what had just been recorded. A nurse did come into the room about five minutes later and took off his empty chemotherapy drip.