Chapter 38

The day arrived and all three showed up at the clinic, when Leo was done he wished them good luck and told them to call before he left. Sara went into the examination room with Sofia and held her hand through the whole thing.

When they got home Sara had put Sofia to bed, Sofia hadn't been able to stop laughing and tried to tell Sara that it wasn't necessary, but Sara hadn't been open for any negotiation, so Sofia had spent the rest of the day in bed.

Four weeks later they went back to the clinic to get an answer to how it had gone, but Sofia already knew since she hadn't been feeling all that well in the morning for the last ten days. Sofia had been right, so they had called Leo to give him the news and afterwards they had gone out to dinner to celebrate it.

Ten days later Brian called Sara and told her to drive to the hospital; he had been working with Sofia when she all the sudden had felt to her knees screaming while blood was running out of her.

Sara arrived at the hospital and was met by Brian outside, he told they wouldn't tell him anything, he promised to look after Mr. Cool but he had to leave since he still was at work, he gave Sara a hug and left.

Sara went inside and was informed where she could find Sofia, she went upstairs and ran into the doctor who had been taking care of Sofia, he sadly had to inform her that Sofia had lost the baby and it was alright for Sara to go see her. Sara took a deep breath before entering the room, she silently went over to the bed not wanting to wake Sofia if she was sleeping but she wasn't.

"Hi sweetie, how are you feeling?" Sara asked in a light tone. Her body language didn't match her voice.

Sofia shook her head negatively without look at her, "I'm not."

Sara took Sofia's hand but Sofia pushed it away, "don't touch me, Sara."

Sara removed her hand like she had burned it, "I'm so sorry, sweetie."

Sofia briefly looked at her, "why? You didn't wanted kids in the first place, you should be glad" Sofia said hotly. Sara was clearly startled by the outburst, but she kept trying.

"Sofia, please don't say that."

"Well, maybe it's god's way of telling us that we aren't suppose to have kids," Sofia snorted a derisive laugh, "we probably wouldn't be very good at it anyway!"

Hurt filled Sara's eyes "Sofia, you know that's not true, please don't do this to us."

"I'm not doing anything to us, but I would like for you to do me a favor. Go away, Sara. Just leave me alone," Sofia said.

"Sofia, no please I don't want to leave you" Sara said gently. She blinked rapidly, tears blurring her vision.

"Sara, just leave I don't want you here!"

Sara took one last look a Sofia before turning and leaving the room. When she reached her car she just sat there for a while not sure about where to go, all she knew was she couldn't go home, she finally started the car and took off.

Around midnight Brian's phone started ringing, he picked it up and answered it, "Brian."

"Hey Brian its Sofia" she replied, her voice low and desolate.

"Hey sweetie, how are you? They wouldn't tell me anything" Brian asked in a concerned voice.

"I don't know I lost it, I just hope I didn't scare you too much" Sofia said apologetically.

"I'm sorry to hear that sweetie, but don't worry about me I'll survive, how is Sara handling it?"

"Well," Sofia hesitated… "I can't get a hold of her; she isn't answering her phone, do you know if she is home?"

"She is not with you?" Brian said softly, turning to face out the window, "her car isn't outside, Sofia she didn't leave you?"

Sofia sniffed, "no she begged to stay, but I kicked her out Brian," she said, blinking back the tears that were threatening again, "Brian, I need to talk to her, where is she?"

"I'm not sure sweetie, but I do have a pretty good idea, why don't you try to get some rest, and I promise I'll try to find her" he said tenderly.

"Okay, thanks Brian," her voice was so low he could barely hear her.

"You're welcome sweetie, talk to you later."

"Yeah later" Sofia muttered.

Brian turned off the phone and looked at Mr. Cool, "time to go find your mom!"

Sara had reached her destination, she turned off the car and got out, she walked down the path until she reached her favorite rock and sat down she opened a beer and took a sip. She looked down on the bottle before throwing it over the edge and finally she let the tears fall. Sara was so lost in thoughts that she almost got a heart attack when she felt a cold snout on her cheek; she flew up and almost knocked Brian down.

Sara gave him a shocked look, "Christ Brian, what the hell are you doing here?"

Brian chuckled, "showing Mr. Cool where he's mom use to hide out."

"Very funny Brian, why are you here?"

"To see if you wanted someone to talk too" Brian said, supportively. "How are you holding up, Sara?"

"I'm not Brian," Sara sat down again, "I don't know how to handle this!"

Sitting down, Brian ran his hands through his hair, "I'm so sorry Sara, and the truth is I don't know what to say."

"It's okay Brian, I don't think there's much to say," Sara looked at him, "how did you know I was up here?"

"I didn't, not until Sofia called asking if I knew where you were, and since you weren't at home," he smiled, "well, this was my first guess."

"Sofia, called you?"

"Yes she did, Sara, she really needs you."

"No she doesn't, trust me Brian; I'm probably the last person on earth she wants to see" she cried, finally dropping her head to his shoulder, sobbing uncontrollably.

Brian placed his hand on Sara jaws and lifted her head, "no Sara, this time you have to trust me, she needs you more than ever and you need her just as much, this is something you two need to work through together or you won't make it."

"Brian, she doesn't want me there" she said, tears starting again.

"Yes she does or she wouldn't have called me and asked to go find you, so get your butt out of here and go back to the hospital" Brian urged gently.

After a minute's hesitation, the brunette let out a sigh and got up, "thanks Brian, can Mr. Cool stay with you?"

"Sure, and Sara please stay this time, I'm not a night owl I need my sleep."

Sara actually smiled at that, "I'll try. See you later."

"Sure, later Sidle."

Sara got into her car and went back to the hospital, when she reached Sofia's door she stopped not sure about what to do not sure she could handle being kicked out one more time. She leaned up against the wall and took a couple of deep breath but she finally gathered enough courage to go inside. Not sure about what to do with herself, she went over and sat down on the chair standing in the room. The room was almost dark the only light came from the machines standing in there, but still Sara didn't looked at Sofia to afraid of what she would be seeing.

"Sara," Sofia whispered.

"Yeah," Sara answered in a low voice.

"Sara, please come over here."

Sara slowly got up and went over to the bed but she didn't touch Sofia and she kept her glance down on the bed. Sofia's hand gently lifted Sara's head until their eyes met and it was all it took Sara's arms went around Sofia she pulled her as close as she could and just hold her. For a long time none of them spoke they just held each other and let the tears fall, but finally Sofia looked up at Sara.

"I am so sorry, Sara" Sofia said, beginning to tremble.

"I know Sof, it's okay" Sara reassured her.

"No it's not, but I swear I didn't mean what I said" Sofia said, tilting her head to observe Sara.

Sara reached a gentle hand to brush the hair out of her eyes, "I know you didn't, sweetie."

"Sara, please stop being so nice, can you at least be a little mad at me?" Her tone clearly carried her embarrassment.

"No I can't Sof, I love you so much, and I'm just so sorry that you have to go through this."

"I love you to Sara, but I'm not the only one who's going through this, I know you are hurting just as much as I am."

"Yeah, but if it wasn't supposed to be at least I'm glad that you are alright, I don't think I could have handle it if something had happen to you as well."

Sofia gave her a little kiss, "Sara, I want to go home, I need you to hold me tonight and tell me that everything are going to be alright."

"I need you just as much Sof" Sara whispered reassuringly, "but I don't think them goner let you go, but I'll go see if I can find a doctor."

"Thanks, sweetie" Sofia said softly.

Sara went and came back.

"I'm sorry Sof, but they won't let you go until the bleeding has stopped."

Sofia slowly started getting out of bed, "well, I'm not staying!"

Sara went over to the bed and stopped her, "yes you are you're not playing Russian roulette with your health."

Sofia started to object, "Sara, please."

"No Sofia," Sara said firmly, but kindly while removing her shoes and pants.

Sofia cocked her head curiously, "Sara, what are you doing?"

Sara gave her a little smile, "we are sleeping together, and if they won't let you go home, then we just have to do it here, so move over, sweetie."

And for the first time that day Sofia smiled, Sara crawled into the bed and wrapped her arms around Sofia and kissed her.

"Sara, are we going to be alright?" Sofia asked in a quiet voice.

Sara nodded her head slightly and remained silent for several minutes. "Yes we are, somehow we will find a way to get through this, I don't know how but I believe we are strong enough to do it together, now try to get some sleep, sweetie."

"I love you Sara, thanks for being here with me" Sofia said, reaching out to caress her hand.

"I love you too" Sara wrapped her arms around her, laying her head on her shoulder. She reached up to brush a lock of hair out of her face, kissing her forehead tenderly. "Thanks for letting me stay here."

Sofia was allowed to go home the next day if she promised to come back if the bleeding started again, which Sara promised she would. Sofia was off work on a sick leave so Sara took some days off from school, they went down to their summer house just to get away from it all, and slowly they started to recover from their lost.

As much as their friends wanted to be there for them they all knew that this was something they had to do alone so they backed off. Sofia was happy she hadn't called her mother yet so she didn't have to call her and give her the sad news and she made Sara promising that they wouldn't mention it to her family.

Sofia started working again and as time went by they slowly started talking about kids again and about if they should give it a new try, but both was very hesitantly afraid they wouldn't be able to handle it if it should happen again.

After talking to several doctors that all had said that the chance for it to happen again was very minimal they finally decided to try again, they talked to Leo to hear if he still was interested which he was.

But this time they decided they didn't wanted to go to a clinic, if it was to happen it would be in the natural way. Not that Sara had any intentions of letting Leo getting close to Sofia but it was something they would be doing themselves at home. So under a lot of laughing they had made space in the freezer, Sara wasn't really sure if it was the semen or the meat she had the biggest problem with, Sofia just found the whole thing funny.

They didn't wanted to follow a temperature table or anything else, if they had sex and remembered it they would use one of the portions Leo had given them, and if they forgot yeah well then they forgot and it just would have to wait until the next time they had sex. It had actually turned out to be quite funny, Sara was playing doctor, and Sofia was yelling at her every time the semen's had been to cold.

Summer came along Sara of course had a long vacation while Sofia only had two weeks, but Sara had talked her in to taking three weeks even if they had to pay for the last week themselves.

Sofia's family had spent some days with them and several of their friends had spent time there as well, but they had managed to have some time to themselves as well, but the three weeks went all too fast and finally they had to go back home. {***}

Then one morning Sofia barely made it to the bathroom before she started throwing up, at first she hadn't thought much about it she just thought she was coming down with the flue which she absolutely didn't had time for since it was Sara's birthday.

Since they almost hadn't celebrated it the year before due to the wedding Sofia had planned a surprise party for Sara this year, at first Sara had pretended to be mad at her, but Sofia knew better and they had ended up having a great party.

But Sofia kept throwing up in the morning and after a few days she had started to get suspicious, it was the same every day, she was sick in the morning but fine for the rest of the day, and when she didn't get her period she just knew what had happen.

But she didn't want to tell Sara until she was absolutely sure so she had ordered an appointment at their doctor; the doctor had confirmed what Sofia already knew that she was pregnant. After coming out from the doctor, Sofia had debated with herself if she should call Sara but she had decided not to, this was not a thing she should be told over the phone so Sofia had decided to wait until she got home from work. Sara was on her way home when her phone rang.

Sara picked up the phone and answered, "Sidle."

"Hey Sara, its Brian, where are you?"

"I'm on my way home, why?"

A cold chill passed through him, "I was wondering if I could get you to drive by the hospital."

"Sure, but why have you had an accident?"

As hard as it was for Brian he chuckled a bit, "I won't tell you before you're here."

Sara chuckled, "okay, I can be there in ten minutes, where can I find you?"

"I'll be waiting outside, see you in ten."

"Sure, see you."

Sara arrived at the hospital but she couldn't see Brian so she parked the car and went inside, Brian met her in the lobby.

"Hey," Sara looked at him, "what's up? You don't look hurt?"

"I'm not Sara, its Sofia she got shot at work today" Brian said, fighting a wince when Sara stared at him disbelievingly.

"What?" Sara gasped, paling noticeably as she looked at him, "Brian, where is she?"

"They are operating on her right now, Sara, let's go into the waiting room Leo is in there he knows more about it than I do."

"Leo, what the hell happened? Sofia knows how to protect herself" Sara asked, her temper fading slightly as she recognized her friend's discomfort.

"I don't know Sara" Leo began, shaking his head in confusion, "we ended up in an ambush, bullets was flying everywhere; she never stood a chance she was hit in the back."

"How bad is it, Leo?" She asked, fighting to keep her voice level.

Leo darted his eyes nervously before looking at her, "I don't know Sara, no one has told us a single word we haven't seen her since she was brought in."

Well, hell would freeze over before no one chose not to tell her anything Sara turned and left the room.

Leo gave Brian a brief stare, "someone better tell her something, or she is going to rip this hospital to pieces!"

Sara came back a little while later. "She has been stable under the operation and it shouldn't be long before they bring her up, and the doctor should be on his way to talk to us."

A few minutes later a doctor came in and talked to them, "she was actually very lucky the bullet went straight through, it has perforated some muscles but that's just about it and they should be able to grow back together again. And with the proper rehabilitation she shouldn't get any permanent injury."

"Can we see her?" Sara asked, taking a steadying breath.

"Only one of you she is still too weak for more."

"Will you look after Mr. Cool?" Sara asked with a forced lightness.

"You know I will, now go see Sofia and call later to let us know how she is doing" Brian said, reaching over to rest a hand on her shoulder.

"Do you want me to stay, Sara?" Leo offered kindly, turning to smile at her.

"No its okay Leo, go home you look like you could use some rest, I'll call you later" she told him before leaving.

Shaking herself, Sara entered Sofia's room and approached the bed. Lost in the middle of the large bed, Sofia lay with numerous IVs replacing her lost blood, supplying nutrients and medications. A bank of equipment monitored her condition.

Sara pushed the chair over to the bed and sat down and took Sofia's hand and just waited for her to wake up. It turned evening and late evening without Sofia waking up once, and as time went on Sara got more and more worried. Around midnight a nurse came into the room to check up on Sofia and the machines she was connected too.

"Excuse me, but can you tell me why she still hasn't woken up?"

The nurse looked at Sara apologetically, "sorry, but my shift has just started so I haven't even looked in her file yet, but I will be glad to go see what I can find out."

"Thanks, I will appreciate that."

The nurse smiled, "I'll be back in a little while."

A while later a doctor came into the room, "good evening I'm Doctor Rice, I was told you wanted to speak with me."

"Yes, I can't understand why she's not waking up."

"It's because we keep her on anesthetic, her body has been under a lot of stress today so to protect the embryo we are going to keep her anaesthetized until tomorrow."

Staring at him speechless for a minute, she turned her head, shaking it as she composed herself. "What..? To what..?"

It wasn't the reaction the doctor anticipated. "Ooh… sorry, I thought you knew she was pregnant."

Sara blinked in confusion, "no, I mean… no, well we have been trying, I just didn't knew we had succeed."

The doctor smiled; "she is only six weeks along so it's not even sure she knows it yet."

Sara got up and looked into the doc eyes, "I need to know…" Sara said after a long silence, "What are the chances that we are losing the child? We have already lost one and I don't think we can go through that again."

"If she gets through the night without any complications then the chances are that the two of you are going to be parents in about seven and a half month," he smiled, "Sofia has a very strong body and it's already protecting the embryo" he offered reassuringly.

"What about the embryo can it tolerate being drugged like that?" Sara asked, a nervous expression on her face.

"That kid is going to get some very protective parents, but the answer is yes," he chuckled. "Sofia's body is making sure that it won't get more than it can take, like I told you her body will protect it from anything."

"Okay" she said after a moment's consideration, "guess, I'll just have to wait."

"Why don't you go home and get some sleep she won't wake up tonight?" The doctor said softly, giving her a kind smile.

"I'm not leaving her so just forget it" Sara replied tersely.

The doc smiled, "I know, I'll get one of the nurses to bring you a pillow and a blanket."

"Thank you" she whispered gratefully to the doctor.

"You're welcome, see you tomorrow when I come and check up on her" the doctor said before leaving the room.

Sara didn't sleep all night ever fifteen minute she lifted Sofia's covers just to make sure that everything was fine. The night went without any problems and the next afternoon they slowly started bringing Sofia's anesthetic down.

Brian came by with some clothes so Sara at least could take a shower, Jodie also came by for a brief moment, later on Leo came by and managed to bring Sara down to the cafeteria and get something to eat.

Afternoon turned to evening without Sofia opened her eyes but the doc had told Sara to expect that. She on the other hand was beginning having a hard time staying awake. She sat down beside the bed and took Sofia's hand the other one she placed on the blonde's lower stomach, she let her head rest on the edge of the bed and soon after she dozed off.

Sofia slowly started waking up, she opened her eyes and looked around, the room was only lit up by a green light coming from a machine standing beside her. A first she was quite confused, but as she started remembering the shooting she pretty fast figured out where she was and then she remembered. Her hand instinctively went down to her stomach. Sara was awake the second she felt Sofia's hand she lifted her head and looked into Sofia's eyes.

"Hi sweetie, you're awake" Sara said lowly.

"Hi, have I been sleeping long?" Sofia asked lightly, giving her a gentle smile.

Sara smiled, "about thirty-six hours!"

"What happen?" Sofia asked nervously, reaching one hand to brush Sara's hair back tenderly.

"You ended up in the middle of a shooting and got shot, but the doc says you were lucky and are going to be alright." They locked gazes for a long moment.

"Sara I…" Sofia started sniffing.

Sara bent down and kissed her, "I know sweetie, and its fine to your body has been doing a fantastic job protecting it."

Scooting up gingerly, Sofia grimaced slightly, "I'm sorry, this wasn't the way you was suppose to hear about it you should have heard it from me."

"Its okay sweetie I'm just glad that both of you are fine" Sara stated softly, "how long have you know?"

"I went by the doctor on my way to work but I didn't want to tell you over the phone, so I decided to wait until we got home" she stated, shaking her head, "guess I just never got home."

Sara chuckled, "well, I know we're not at home, but is there anything you want to tell me?"

Sofia smiled, "I love you Sara, oh… and I'm pregnant!"

"You are?" Sara tried to look surprised, "whoa… how did that happen?" Sara cupped Sofia's cheeks and bent down and gave her a little kiss, "I love you too. Anything I can get you?"

"I would like something to drink" Sofia said, softly, pointing to a cup sitting beside the bed.

Sara went over and pick up some juice, and gave it to Sofia, "wow sweetie, slow down or you are going to throw up."

"Aww Sara, don't say that I'm so tired of throwing up I haven't been doing anything else for the last fourteen days" Sofia said with a wan smile.

"Sorry, sweetie I'll find a doc who can take a look at you" Sara said, running a hand lightly across her arm.

The doctor came in and looked Sofia over, "everything seems to be fine, how are you feeling?"

"A bit sore and tired" Sofia replied, her eyes closing briefly.

"That's perfectly usually you probably going to be sore for a while, but after a good night's sleep you should start feeling a bit fresher."

"What about the baby?"

Like I told your wife last night, you shouldn't expect any problems, it seems to be a very strong embryo and you have a very protectively body," he chuckled, "I think you will be lucky if your body ever allows the baby to come out."

Sofia raised her eyebrows in understanding, "so when can I go home?"

Not for the first three days after that we'll see, it will depend on how you are doing in your healing process."

Sofia dropped her head into her hands, letting out a groan, "three days."

"Sweetie" Sara said, darting her eyes towards Sofia.

"Yes dear, better safe than sorry" Sofia muttered, casting an evil glare in Sara's direction.

The doctor laughed; "see you ladies tomorrow, and Sofia, try to get some more sleep."

Sara came over and sat down, "you heard the doc, better try to get some more sleep."

Sofia looked at her, "sweetie, why don't you go home? I think you need sleep more than I do."

"No, I'm fine" Sara said in a very soft voice.

"Then at least go get something to eat or a smoke or some coffee, have you even eaten while you been here?"

"Yes I have, and I don't smoke!"

"You don't since when?" Sofia asked with a bewildered expression.

"Since I found out my wife is pregnant" Sara said, giving her a smile.

Sofia slowly went back to sleep with a smile on her lips.

Four days later Sofia went home, but it took almost a month before she was allowed to start working again, but at least she had stopped throwing up in the morning.

Tbc…