So...I know it's been a while but lets just ignore that and get onto the next chapter shall we? Waring: Long chapter ahead :)
Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar or Pandora or and Prolemuris
"Ray, if you're going to have your butt in the air the least you can do is put on some pants." I called after Ray's blue patterned butt that was climbing after a poor Prolemuris in the tree tops above. Ray had recently developed an crazy idea that we could make a pet out of a Prolemuris and was now determined to catch one and become best friends with it.
"I do have some on!" He yelled back, out of breath from chasing the annoyed lemur.
"That is a loin cloth."
"Ahh!" Came Ray's strangled cry from the tree tops above, followed by his large body tumbling down through the branches of the tree and landing with a large "Huff!"
I rolled my eyes. This wasn't the first time today that Ray had fallen. "Can we head back now? I really have to pee." I complained as Ray climbed to his feet and dusted himself off.
"Can't you go over behind some bushes or something?"
I gave him a flat look. He couldn't be serious.
He sighed. "Ok fine, I'm hungry anyways."
I grabbed my pack off of the ground that contained meat wraps we had been using to try and bait the Prolemuris with. "We can try again tomorrow." I smiled, throwing the pack over my shoulder and joining Ray in the short walk back home.
After walking in mutual silence for a few moments Ray said, "So what's the plan?"
"Plan?" I asked, confused.
"You know. The grandmaster plan of discovering the truth behind the whole parentage thing. Are you planning on going back to base soon? How are you gonna do it? The plan," He explained. "You have been planning right?"
"Oh." I muttered. To be honest I had no clue. "What do you think I should do?" I asked hoping he would have some ideas.
A thoughtful expression passed over his face for a moment before he answered my question. "Well, if I were you I'm not sure if I would inform base that I was coming back."
"Why not?" I enquired.
"You may not know much about this, but the RDA has been known to do..shifty things in the past." I blinked in surprise. I'd never heard anything about the RDA doing anything bad. But honestly I'd lived a very sheltered life up to this point."Let's say..supposedly," he gave me a pointed look,"That the RDA did kidnap you from the clan when you were two years old. They aren't going to want a scandal like that to reach the public or even worse, reach Earth. They won't hesitate to ensure you are kept quiet..and things could turn out ugly. They will do anything nefarious if it means keeping you a secret."
My eyes widened at Ray's words. Anything? For the first time ever I felt I small spike of fear of the RDA.
"Now let's say you don't inform base your coming back. You only let a select few people know such as Helen and few trustworthy people that I know. We could slip in, talk to a few people, and get to the bottom of this whole thing without causing a scene. That way you get the answers you need, but safely."
I nodded thoughtfully. Ray had a point. If I only told a few people, things were less likely to end up badly. Then something occurred to me. "You said 'we'". I pointed out.
Ray grinned. "You didn't think I was going to let you do this alone did you, kid?"
I grinned back. "So how are we going to get there?"
Ray shrugged. "I wouldn't recommend calling in for a gunship. Too suspicious. From the looks of it, were going to have to do this on foot."
"You mean horseback. I have a direhorse remember?" I added. "I could teach you to ride a direhorse of your own so that Helen won't have to carry both our weight."
His face lit up with excitement and I couldn't help but chuckle. Ray may be ten years older then me, but he was still a kid at heart.
"I think the biggest question is when. When are we going to do all of this?" Ray questioned.
I thought for a moment. I felt no rush, but it was probably best to get this whole thing over with. I still had the matter of talking to Tali to deal with. "There are some things I need to take care of first. We can do it after I turn eighteen. Then I'll let you know."
He nodded and we continued walking in mutual silence. "So.." He said breaking the silence and after a short pause continued, "How long has that thing between you and the stiff guy been going on?"
My mouth fell open in surprise at Ray's words. How did he know about that? Gar'han and I had kept our whole budding 'relationship' pretty low key. Why was Ray so damn observant? The last person I wanted to talk about my love life to would be Ray.I stammered for an awkward moment. "Huh-wha? Um..." I glanced up at him to see he was smirking. I sent him a sharp glare and grumbled "I don't know who you are talking about".
"Jess," He said a bit more seriously this time. "You'll be turning eighteen very soon. And according to Na'vi tradition you'll be able to chose your lifemate. Will you chose him?" He probed.
"No!" I said quickly, my cheeks heating up in embarrassment. "I mean, well...no." Things were just beginning with Gar'han and becoming lifemates would be too much too soon for me. Besides that, the thought bonding with one person..for the rest of my life was still something I was no where ready for. I felt too young, too immature for such a serious decision.
"Jessy, the Na'vi take mating very seriously," He said slowing our walk to a stop and eyeing me intently. "You may not have much planned for your relationship with him, but he may. He seems much older and more experienced then you. Make sure you know what you're doing, and what you want out of the whole thing."
I gulped. Just what didI want from my relationship with Gar'han? Until now I'd never put much thought into what was going on between Gar'han and I. Instead I just went along with it. With a slight sinking feeling I released that my attraction to Gar'han so far had been a physical thing. It was all so new and exciting to me that, up until now, I hadn't noticed that I really had no clue what I was doing.
I found it ironic and slightly amusing that Ray thought Gar'han was to old for me. If he only knew who my previous attentions were towards...Something told me Ray didn't really like Gar'han. I voiced this thought."You don't like him do you?"
Ray smirked. "It's hard to like someone who constantly sends you death threats with their eyes" I giggled at this. True. Gar'han had a tendency to shoot eye daggers at Ray.
"I'm only concerned for you." he said softly, ruffling a hand in my hair..
I smiled back. "Thanks Ray." I said just as we were arriving at the above ground camp where many Na'vi were gathered. I spotted Fara emerging fom a tent and was surprised to see a baby being held in a sling to her chest.
"Who's is that?" I blurted dumbly as I approached her after leaving Ray by the firepit in the center of the camp, knowing the baby couldn't belong to her.
"Fnu,(hush) he is asleep." She said in a hushed tone.
"Oh right sorry!" I whispered quickly, although everyone around us continued to speak at normal volume. "Why did you bring him here?" I asked.
"I'm watching him for my older cousin but a few hunters and I are going to take a Nek'tum tsu'yahnee s'ashk'ey and fish. Do you think you could watch him for little while I'm gone, please?" She asked as she began to remove the sling from around her neck.
"Um.. what's a Nek'tum tsu'yahnee s'ashk'ey?" I asked. She was already placing the baby sling softly around my neck. I was distracted for the moment by the odd weight of the little baby cradled against my chest as he slumbered.
"You know, wood that lays on water. A canoe. I just fed him so he should be fine. Irayo, (thanks)" she said as she dissapeared back into the tent. I blinked and stumbled away to the fire pit carrying a random baby, still having to go pee.
I took a seat next to Ray at the fire pit as I stared dumbfounded at the baby I was holding. He had soft little features, barely touched with light rounded patterns. He was so cute! And so tiny! I resisted the urge to lean closer and take a deep whiff of his little baby aroma.
"Your holding a baby." Ray stated, just now noticing the bundle slung across my chest was a breathing.
"Really Ray? Because I hadn't noticed."
"Why are you holding it?"
"Fara is going to go canoeing and asked me to."
"Who's is it?"
"Fara's cousin's."
"What's her name?"
"I don't know. I've never met her."
"I'm talking about the baby."
"It's a boy, not a girl!"
"How was I supposed to know?"
"Well why did you assume the baby was a girl?"
"Why did you assume Fara's cousin was a girl?"
I blinked for a moment as Ray grinned childishly. For whatever reason, Ray found humor in confusing me. "If I wasn't holding an infant right now I'd break my foot in your a-"
"But you are in fact holding an infant so you can keep your feet out of my a-"
"Irayo Jessy! I'll be back in a little bit." Fara called from across the camp, where her and Ja'ki were carrying a hardwood carved canoe that looked to be about 5 meters long. I pouted. They were about to participate in an extreme, and fun water sport while I baby sat a child whose name I didn't even know. I hoped Ja'ki's big ass sunk the canoe. With one final, happy wave, Fara dissapearedd off with Ja'ki to go have some extreme fun.
"What's the pout for?" Ray asked as he stuffed his mouth with a meat wrap. Was that the same wrap we'd been using to bait the prolemuris with?
"I don't want to babysit, I want to canoe." I sniffed, staring dejectedly into the fire.
Ray rolled his eyes at me as he devoured another meat wrap. What was in those things? "Have your boyfriend take you." He said, clearly unworried.
"He's not my boyfriend!" I shot back reflexively, and maybe a bit too loudly. My outburst was followed by a baby's wail that came right from my lap. I looked at the crying baby in horror. How was I supposed to make it stop crying?
"You woke up the baby!"
"Ray, your not helping!" I growled as I pulled the crying baby out of the sling and let it dangle in front of me for a moment unsure what to do. His tiny, blue face scrunched up as he continued to sob. "Maybe it's hungry." I regarded the baby as I would an alien. What did babies eat anyway? Wait, didn't Fara say she just fed him?
"He's probably just grumpy bacause you woke him up." Ray offered, still chowing down.
"How do you know?" I asked skeptically still holding the baby in the air. I was starting to get looks from the other Na'vi around the firepit. "Oh mind your business!" I wanted to snap. "Don't tell me how to take care of my kid." Oh right. Not my kid.
"I used to take care of my little sister when she was a baby." He muttered. "If he's sleepy the best thing to do is to rock him till he quiets down a bit."
Eagerly taking his advice, I brought the infant back to my chest and began to rock him back in forth. "Like this?" I asked uncertainly. glancing up at Ray. He nodded. Almost immediately the baby's crying quieted slowly until he wasn't crying at all. For a moment a bit of pride swelled in my chest at the the accomplishment of stopping a baby's cries. Phew! He almost had me sweatin there for a moment!
"Remind me never to have kids." I said to Ray, who was watching the baby in admiration. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at him. Of course Ray would be the fatherly type.
"Why wouldn't you want kids? They're the greatest thing God has given us." Ray chuckled,leaning closer to poke at the little baby's nose. The baby clumsily caught Ray's finger with a tiny hand and toyed with it.
I grinned looking up at Ray. "I feel sorry for the girl you marry. You probably plan on having twelve of 'God's Greatest Gifts'".
He smirked at me knowingly. "Somethin like that." His eyes attached to something over my shoulder and his smirk grew. He leaned in closer, right next to my ear to whisper something. I leaned in eagerly also, hoping he was about to tell me a juicy secret that he didn't want any one else to hear.
"Your boyfriend is coming over this way and he looks jealous." Ray whispered, way to close to me. If he leaned in any closer he would squish the baby. Just because Ray didn't like Gar'han didn't mean he got to make him jealous.
"Raymund, you scoot any closer and I'll rip off your family jewels so that way you wont even have a chance at conceiving those twelve kids." I said sweetly just as Gar'han arrived at my side. I smiled up at Gar'han as he took seat on my other side. Out of the corner of my eyes I smugly noticed Ray stiffly cross his legs.
"Hello," I greeted.
"Kaltxì," he greeted back glancing at Ray unhappily. "Why are you holding a baby?" He asked, not actually sounding to interested as he impaled (a bit menacingly)a roll of meat with a skewer and held it over the fire.
"He's Fara's cousin's. She asked me to watch him because apparently she wanted to go enjoy some extreme water sports. Her and Ja'ki went canoeing which left me as the designated baby sitter." I rambled rather bitterly. I didn't think he was listening as I just now noticed his meat roll was engulfed in the fire as he sent a Ray a threatening look. Wait. Was that meat wrap meant to symbolize Ray?
"I can take you canoeing if you're really that upset about it," Ray offered not even noticing the poor meat wrap that was experiencing third degree burn. I was just happy someone was listening to my suffering.
"Kahe".(No) Gar'han said suddenly, dropping the skewer into the fire pit, symbolically casting Ray into the fiery depths of hell. "I can take you. Tomorrow if you want."
I beamed at Gar'han. Finally something fun to do!
"He doesn't even have a canoe." Gar'han reasoned casting a look over at Ray who blinked at him innocently.
"I was planning to make one." He defended.
I snickered as my eyes settle down on the baby I was holding, just now noticing he had fallen back asleep. I wasn't surprised that Ray's advice had worked. He really was paternal. Eywa help me if I ever had a baby.
Later that day, on into the evening Fara returned from her little canoe trip with Ja'ki looking happy, wet and like she had just had a blast. I eagerly deposited the child into her arms, hoping that it was a one time experience and headed off to the sleeping quarters.
xxXXxx
The day arrived bright an early. After breakfast and a bath I headed out in search for Gar'han anxious to start canoeing. I ended up in the above ground camp asking fellow Na'vi if they had seen him. A woman pointed me in the direction towards a tent near the back of the camp. I quickly thanked her and made my way towards the tent.
I pulled back the tent flap to find Gar'han tightening a bound reeve on a wooden canoe paddle. "Kaltxì Gar'han,"I greeted brightly, not normally a morning person but knowing the plans for today had set me in an unusually happy mood.
He looked surprised but obviously pleased to see me and stood up to reach behind me to close the tent flap. Before I knew it his lips were pressed onto mine. What a great way to start off the day! I eagerly responded closing the space between us, knowing no one could see us, and moved my lips with his.
When I pulled back to catch a breath, I giggled, "If this is the way we're going to spend the rest of the day then that's fine by me."
He chuckled as he reached up to softly touch my lips, his other hand buried deeply in my hair. "No, I promised I would take you out on the river and I intend to keep that promise. You especially need to concentrate today when we are in the Nek'tum tsu'yahnee s'ashk'ey. If you don't it can be very dangerous."
I smirked as my hands found their way around his neck, "Then I guess we better get this out of our system." My lips attached back to his as he groaned in pleasure. I personally didn't believe there was an actual way to get Gar'han out of my system but I intended to test the theory.
About fifteen minutes later Gar'han and I emerged from the tent, both looking a bit off balanced and certainly un-kept. Kissing Gar'han was becoming a new hobby of mine. I trailed behind him, carrying the canoe paddles, to the canoe rack. If we received any curious looks, I didn't notice. My attention was captured by the way Gar'han's finely toned back muscles moved as he unloaded a long canoe from a near shelf.
"Who's canoe is this?"
"Ja'ki's"
"Hand me those paddles." I passed on the paddles and watched as he tied them securely to the side of the canoe and latched a bag on the inside rail. After he finished, he grabbed one end of the canoe and told me to do the same with the other. Following his direction I hefted the canoe to my side. On his count we both lifted it upwards and set it on our shoulders. Somehow, I think Gar'han was carrying more weight then me.
"I can't see." I stated the obvious, only able to see the ground in front of me.
"Just follow me." Gar'han instructed and began to make his way over the mossy ground with me stumbling behind. He was just like Ray! He made everything look easy. Soon we were traveling through the green canopy of the forest, with me uncertain of where we were exactly. Before long, I began to hear the sound of flowing water and knew we were close. Promptly we reached the bank of a river. On Gar'han's count we let down the canoe and Gar'han forced it into the river while walking into the water.
"Come into the water," he instructed, still holding the canoe to keep it from sliding away into the river stream.
"Is it cold?" I asked hesitantly, making my way to the bank while marveling at how crystal clear the water was.
A small smile played over his lips. "Not at all."
When I took my first step into the water I sent Gar'han a mean look. "Liar." It was cold but not too bad.
"Before we get into the canoe, you should know the basic parts. This," He motioned to the front part of the canoe," is the bow. In the center is the-" He was cut off when I splashed him squarely in that defined chest of his.
"What was that for?" He exclaimed, his ears perked out in surprise as goosebumps went up his neck from the chilly water.
"You said the water wasn't cold." I explained ready for a water fight but instead Gar'han said seriously, "Elut si, this is important."
"Now," he began again, continuing from where he left off, "The center of the canoe is called the hull. These two saddles are the seats. This is where I will sit, and this is where you will be seated and you will REMAIN SEATED for the duration of the trip." He paused, making sure I had heard that part, then continued, "The decks are here and here, which are NEVER to be stood on." Another pause. "Right here is the thwart..." He droned on about the anatomy of the canoe.
I did my best to pay attention even though Gar'han was being a fun sucker. After what seemed like forever Gar'han finally said, "Okay, You can climb in first. Just remember, your center of gravity is everything." Finally.
With out needing to be told anything else, I made my way into the canoe, stepping out of the shallow water and climbing in the canoe. It rocked precariously for a moment before it steadied. Gar'han removed the paddles from the sides then placed them on my lap before joining me in the canoe, sitting in the front with me in the rear.
"Ready?" Gar'han asked over his shoulder as he dipped his padddle into the water, with me mirroring his action.
"Ready."
And with that we began to paddle out into the into the middle of the river. The flow of the river wasn't very strong, but enough to push us forward without paddling. I brought my paddle back onto my lap seeing no use for it and took a moment to gaze down through the crystal clear water over the side of the long boat. Through the water I could see small fish like creatures dashing through the river, never staying still.
I decided to lean back and rest my back against the deck and closed my eyes. It wasn't the most comfortable position I'd ever been in but it was better then standing up straight.
I couldn't suppress the brief smile that flashed across my lips when a breeze rustled my hair. This was nice. Relaxing. If I had my way, I could spend all day just floating along this river without a care in the world.
I considered for a moment life out here compared to a month before when I was happy living my simple life. True I was happy living that life but somehow still lonely. An alien among humans, totally unaware of what was on the other side of Hell's Gates. This was what was waiting for me. This was what was on the other side. Freedom. After this whole experience I couldn't imagine going back to that life. That old life. Now that I knew what was out here.
I'd learned so much in such little time. There was nothing savageabout the Na'vi. Just because they're traditions and culture were different from what I was used didn't make them any lesser then me. The Na'vi were fascinating. So much more then what I could have imagined. And now I felt as though I was one of them. No longer an outsider or alienable. I was among my kind.
No, I couldn't imagine going back to my old life. I was too in love with the Na'vi. Too in love with Pandora. The sheltered life was no longer for me. Eywa had placed in Pandora to open my eyes.
"Jessy," My eyes snapped open and I realised I had almost been falling asleep. "Grab your paddle, we've reached a fork."
I sat u straight and squinted as the sun shimmered atop the water. Were slowly approaching a fork in the river just as Gar'han said that formed a V. The left side continued in slow calm flow, but to the right the water rushed fast, leading to...I don't know what.
"What does the right side lead to?" I vioced my thoughts to Gar'han, as I dipped my paddle into the river.
"Waterfall. We're going left." Gar'han canoe naturally was being pulled to rushing water on the right, so Gar'han began pushing the paddle through the water towards the the left.
I hesitated, my eyes still on the right side. As we came closer to large V my mouth turned up into a grin. "No, we're going right."
"What?" Gar'han barked, just as we made it to the V I dug my paddle into the water at the last moment and sent us swerving into the right side and into rapid flowing water. It didn't take much strength because the canoe was already being pulled towards the right with out help. WIthin a matter of seconds we had left the calm waters and slicing through the brisk right side. "Jessy!"
A fierce giggle left my throat in the thrill of the dangerous water slicing past us. "Relax Gar'han! This is going to be fun!" I called as my face was sprayed with the splashing water. By the end of this we would be drenched!
Just as those words left my mouth I noticed a rock jutting out from the water directly in our path and let out shrill squeal. Gar'han reflexively used his paddle to dodge the death trap.
"Follow what I do!" Gar'han called over his shoulder as he once again leaned the canoe out of the way of another dangerous rock.
"Ok!" I leaned my body in the same direction as his and maneuvered past slabs of rock. I was concentrating so hard on Gar'han's movements that I almost didn't see the river was ending in a cliff less then one-hundred meters ahead of us.
"Gar'han! The cliff!" I screeched pointing my finger at the edge of the waterfall.
"I see it. When I say so, grab onto me and don't let go of your paddle!" He yelled over the loud rushing of water.
I gripped my paddle harder as my eyes focused on the waterfall looming in our path. My tenth clenched as adrenaline rushed through my veins. The cliff was now right in front of me. All I could think was my recklessnesss has killed us both!
"NOW!" Without hesitation I lurched forward and wrapped my arms around Gar'han's waist, paddle still in hand, and prepared for my self induced death.
We went plunging over the edge of the waterfall with the canoe still somehow underneath. Water rush past us heavily and for a moment I was sure we would become fully submerged. Then with a loud SMACK we landed into the water below. The water down here was far choppier and rapid then before. I didn't even have time to process that we were still alive.
"Get ready to dodge more rocks." Gar'han called over his shoulder. Without a chance to answer him we began to swerve past large rocks, weaving through the rapid paced water. We continued to dodge formations for a little while. I could feel my muscles begin to strain from the efforts of following Gar'han's every move.
Just when I thought I couldn't take it anymore we suddenly reached a clearing where the water was calm and gentle. I realised we'd reached some type of lake.
Now that the water was no longer loud and blaring I realised just how hard I was breathing. I let out a loud huff of relief. "Now that was fun!" I exclaimed breathely removing my soaking wet hair out of my face. I was drenched. I giggled. "Yeah, you were right Gar'han. We probably should have gone to the left." I giggled a little more and slumped in my seat, closing my eyes. "I have to admit, I was scared there for a second." My limbs felt like wet noodles. After a moment I noticed that Gar'han wasn't saying anything. Oh boy, here comes the long speech about how reckless I am.
I blinked my eyes open and was surprised to see Gar'han standing over me. I squinted. His back was to the sun so it made him into a black silhouette. What the hell, I hadn't even felt him move. "What are do-" I was cut off as he suddenly stooped down to grab me and before I could even process what he was doing he was holding me over his shoulder.
"You're going to tip the canoe! Put me down!" I squealed in panic. Without warning I felt my body being launched into the air. I screamed for a short moment before hitting the water. I emerged from the lake, spewing water.
My eyes frantically locked on Gar'hans calm ones. He sat relaxed in the canoe with a smirk formed on his face. "What was that for!" I sputtered, paddling in the water.
"For almost getting us both killed." He replied easily as the smirk widened.
I narrowed my eyes as a playful scowl formed on my lips. With a mischievous grin I took a deep breath then ducked back under the water. I glided under the water until I'd reached the underbelly of the canoe. Exerting as much force as my feeble muscles could muster, I pushed the canoe until I could it feel tip over.
When I came back from under the canoe I was laughing. I swiveled around in search of Gar'han. He emerged from the water a few yards behind me with a a glare on his face directed towards me. My laughter only increased.
After sending a large splash in the direction of Gar'han's face, I went swimming as fast I could towards shore, knowing he was hot on my tail. I soon could touch the bottom with my feet. Standing up I raced, well waded, the heavy water as fast as I could, my heart beating from the thrill of being chased. Just as I made it to shore I felt a hand clamp around the end of my tail and yank me back. He knew I hated it when my tail was touched!
We both fell to the grassy ground, with me on top. Before he had a chance to move, I snatched his hands and held them to the ground above his head.
"Admit it. You had fun." I teased, straddling his hips and leaning in until our lips were almost touching. He lifted his jaw up just an inch in an effort to make our lips touch but I pulled back still teasing him. "Admit it." I demanded.
Tired of being teased Gar'han flipped us over so he was above me. He smirked as he placed me in the same position he was in less then a moment ago. Without hesitating his lips captured mine forcefully. He pulled away to kiss his way down my throat. "Okay, I had fun." He said, I cold feel him smiling. Gar'han could definitely be fun when he wanted to be. As his hands suddenly grasped my hips and pulled me closer to him I gasped at the contact and wrapped my legs around him.
He chuckled at my reaction and continued to kiss his lips down to my collar bone. As his hands slid up my slipery hips and to my waist I felt him murmur into my neck, "Mmm, you are soaked." I don't think my face could have gotten any redder. I doubted he could have meant the double-entendre but still. It was enough to make me blush. It only made my body more...excited. And from the feel of it, himtoo. But usually Gar'han didn't let it go further then this.
Almost on cew Gar'han pulled away to lay on the grass to my side. I let out a sigh of impatience wishing we could go further and not knowing why we couldn't. I wasn't exactly sure what I meant by further. I, of course, had never been anywhere with a guy.
"Maybe one day Jessy, but not anytime soon." Gar'han said quietly, bringing his arms behind his head to stare at the sky just as I was.
"Why?" I groaned hoping I didn't sound too whorish. Oh, come on. I'm a teenager! I'm dealing with hormones and stuff. But really Gar'han was one sexy man, and any grown woman in my position would feel the same frustration.
"Were are not even bonded!" Gar'han replied, as if that was the obvious answer. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed him bring his fist to his temple to rub it. I hoped I wasn't giving him a headache.
"Humans do, er, stuff all the time with multiple partners and they don't bond!" I exclaimed my cheeks heating once again. I think could have been a better way to word that.
"But you are not human Jessy. You are Na'vi, and you should behave like it for once." Gar'han said rather harshly.
His tone of voice silenced me. I resisted the wince at his thinly veiled insult and stood up, dusting my self off. Ignoring the little throb in my chest from Gar'hans words, I turned my back towards him to face the lake.
"What I mean is that-" Gar'han began apoligetically but I quickly cut him off.
"The canoe is floating away." I said, ending the dispute.
xxXXxx
After fetching the canoe and bringing it onto the bank (which wasn't an easy task) we unpacked the lunch Gar'han had brought us and ate on the grassy shore.
Gar'han pointed out and named certain animals or critters that I'd never laid eyes on before. The Tetrapteron for example was an odd looking but beautiful looking creature that was completely unfamiliar to me. A small flock of them were gathered not to far from where Gar'han and I lounged. They resembled flamingos to me. Except instead of pink feathers it had thick, purple, patterned skin. And of course flamingos didn't have tails and glossy sharp teeth. I wondered how many other animals inhabited Pandora that I'd never heard of.
I spent a great deal of time chasing after the Tetrapteron just for the fun of it. I had started by attempting to bait them with fish but had soon grown bored and decided to just full on chase them. Gar'han had told me sagely, "You must wait for one to come to you first. Patience is the everything." But of course I didn't listen. Finally giving up on my childish antics I flopped to the ground beside Gar'han with a huff of resignation. I sighed my eyes pulled my braid over my shoulder to play with it.
I glanced at Gar'han to see him staring across the lake with a far away look in his eyes. I wandered if he had even notist my Tetrapteron chase. He seemed to be thinking about something.
"What are thinking about?" I asked out right.
He seemed to snap out of whatever stupor he was in and looked down at me. His expression was unexplainable for a moment before his eyes quickly flitted away. "Nothing," he muttered.
My forehead scrunched in curiosity. I wandered what he was really thinking. Not wanting to probe to much, I let it drop and scooted forward to rest my head on his broad shoulder. To my pleasure I felt his arm wrap around my waist and I snuggled deeper into his side. We sat in peace for a while as I idly continued to fiddle with my braid. I watched with complete content as ripples spread over the lake and disappeared before new ones were replaced them. I was so cozy and comfortable that I could feel myself becoming sleepy.
Just when I was beginning to doze off I felt Gar'han inhale a deep breath then hesitate. After a short second he let it out. For a moment I was sure he was about to say something. My curiosity peeked when I felt him shift uncomfortably. What was up with him?Just as I was about to voice these thoughts, Gar'han spoke.
"It's just better that we don't." He started. I blinked in confusion. What was he talking about? "I mean, don't think that I don't understand, because I do. I was a teenager once, too, but you don't get how serious sex is."
My face turned red in complete embarrassment. My immature little brain could only process one thing. Gar'han just said the word sex. Gar'han just said the word sex! I opened my mouth but nothing came out. So that's what he had been thinking about.
"Without Eywa's approval sex is just sex. Not lovemaking. Sex."
He said sex four times. I cleared not only my throat but my head. "I, um, I mean I, well we don't have to do that. We could er, just , you now, do more then kissing like other things. Uh, I don't know." I finished lamely, my face turning ten different shades of red.
"But other things lead to sex, Jessy." He asserted. And after hesitation he said, "I don't think you even understand the consequences of such an action."
I frowned. "I'm not a stupid little kid. I know what could happen." I blushed some more. I'd already had the sex talk with Helen. For what reason? I don't know. It wasn't as if I was ever around any male of my own species.
Gar'han was obviously concerned over my virginity and youth. He probably was feeling guilt over my age and didn't want to take way any of my innocence. However this was really starting aggravate me. When would he realise I was a full grown woman?
"No Jessy, You don't understand. You are still thinking as a human and not a Na'vi." He said quietly. I felt him make standing up and I pulled back. With slow steps he walked towards the shore of the lake and bent down to grab a rock. After selecting a few he began toss them out into the deep water.
After hesitation, I also stood up to join him. "I think I do understand. You see me as a kid. You think I'm too young and ignorant to even understand what sex is." I vented out my aggravation.
"No, that's not it. I realize you a mature adult, believe me I've noticed." His eyes momentarily raked over my figure before they dropped to the rocks in his hands. "I, I just refuse to make the same mistake twice." With that he roughly heaved the fist of rocks far out into the water. His mouth turned down into a bitter line and I could see some strange emotions pass through his eyes.
Now I was really confused. "Wait, what are you talking about?" I asked.
He finally turned to look at me and drew in a deep breath before continuing quietly. "Eywa's consent is everything. Without it, you are going against her. Behind her back. A couple must make the bond before Eywa before they mate. To do it backwards would be... would be wrong." He stated. I noticed him gulp and I wondered if he would continue. "I learned this the hard way." He whispered coarsely before tearing his eyes away from me to look at the ground.
My curiosity was now at it's limits. "Gar'han, what are you talking about?" Just as the words left my mouth I thought of what Fara had told me about his past mate. Wait was he saying..noo.
"I've had a mate before Jessy but not a life-mate." I let this sink in for a moment. I quickly remembered that Gar'han didn't know that I was aware of his past mate. However, I hadn't known that they hadn't bonded so I did not have to fake the suprise on my face.
"We did not bond before Eywa. I was young, about your age when I met her. She was beautiful young Na'vi woman and I fell for her quickly." I fought back the hot wave of jealousy that shot through my body. I bet she was prettier then me. Better then me. More of a Na'vi then me. I gritted my teeth and hissed at myself pay attention! "But back then I could not distinguish the difference between love and lust. There was a problem though. She was already betrothed to another man. A man much older then I. So we kept our relationship a secret from everyone. She had wanted it that way.
"It wasn't long before I relationship became physical..." I could feel a steady pulse in my temple by this point.Don't think about it. Don't think about him with her. Together. Entwined. Like a pair of- STOP! "We however never made the bond."
"Why not?" I blurted.
He glanced down at me then continued. "Like I said before, I was young and...lustful. I wasn't ready to carry the weight of being mate to a single person for life." His younger self sounded a lot like me. "I was stupid to think that we could continue on without the consent of Eywa. It wasn't long before she became with child." Gar'han stopped for a moment to take in another deep breath. I could tell this was taking alot out him just say this. I reached up to rub his back in encouragement. After a few more moments he continued.
"At first I was scared. I was so young and unprepared. But eventually I was became happy that I would be a father. As her belly grew, I became more and more eager. I swore to myself that no matter what would take care of both Kilae and the child and never let harm come to them.
"Then the day came when she went into labor." He closed his eyes. I had a sick feeling in my stomach. I wasn't sure if I wanted hhim to continue "They child was born unmoving. A still birth. Neither one survived."
I felt sick. Ill. Sad. Sympathetic. It wasn't fair! The entire thing was just retched. How could something so awful have happened to this undeserving man? It was a...tragedy. I felt guilty. Like it was my fault that Gar'han was having to relive this.
Not knowing what else do to, I threw my arms around Gar'han to embrace him. "I'm so sorry Gar'han." He felt like a stiff piece of card board in my arms.
"I'm, I..."He stammered for a moment. He sounded so broken. "It's my fault."
I gasped. "What?"
"Completely my fault." He repeated, stronger this time. "I knew what we were doing was wrong. We did not have Eywa's blessings. It was Eywa's way of punishing me."
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. How could he blame himslef for something was entirely out of his hands? And say it was his punishment! I pulled back to look at him. His eyes seemed haunted. He stared past me, as if he was still caught up in reliving the memory.
"Gar'han," I said. He still wasn't looking at me. I softly grabbed his face so he facing me. Finally his eyes snapped to mine. "Listen to me. This was NOT your fault-"
"No, I-"He started.
"Listen to me Gar'han. There is nothing you could have done to stop this. These things do happen. You can't blame yourself or Eywa for this. Taking away the life of a child and woman...it's just not the way Eywa works. It wasn't your fault." I said evenly keeping eye contact. I didn't know what else I could say to make him understand that he wasn't to blame. I desperately pulled him in for another hug. This time he melted into me and hugged back.
I felt him sigh. "You are not only beautiful on the outside Jessy, but also on the inside. You think the best of everybody. But your heart is young and too frogiving. All I can do now I promise to never make the same mistake again."
I closed my eyes buried my face in his chest, wishing I could take some the weight off of his shoulders. Gar'han had obviously experienced more pain then I ever had. I thought of the younger Gar'han that Fara had described. Always laughing she had said. Perhaps with time and effort I could bring back that old Gar'han. I knew he was in there. I'd seen him today. All he needed was help finding that happiness. And I would be just the one to help him.
I felt a small nudge from the back of my thigh and turned around in confusion. There stood a small Tetrapteron, cocking it's head curiously at me. I shook my head in wander. I had spent half an hour just trying to touch one, and now this one just waltz right up to me. Ridiculous. Without even thinking I reached foward to touch the bird but it quickly shrunk back and flitted a few feet away. Just I was about to go chase it I felt Gar'han's hand on my shoulder.
"Wait for it to come to you. Patience is everything." He said from behind me.
I hesitated and for once in my life did what I was told. I gently crouched down to the ground and held my hand out to the bird. It eyed my hand suspiciously. I didn't have any fish for it so doubted it would be interested. Just when I felt my arm growing tired, the Tatrateron to a hesitant step towards me, followed by another until it was close enough to touch. I smiled in awe and gently touched it's leathery skin with the palm of my hand. It felt just the way it looked. Smooth and hairless and a little bit odd.
Hmmm...maybe patience was everything. I could apply the same principle to Gar'han. All I needed to do was be patient and wait for him. I could definitely do that. I was willing to do anything to make Gar'han a happier person.
xxXXxx
Eltu Si!" (Pay attention!)
My attention snapped back Gar'han. I'd been daydreaming. As usual. I internally groaned. I was really starting to hate these bow and arrow lessons. They were so boring. And so repetitive. And what was even worse was that Gar'han had set in place a 'no touching' rule durring our lesson. Apparently I got too "distracted". Bleh.
Yesterday had been fun, exciting, and educational. And defenitly learened alot more about Gar'han. And most of all, it was interesting. But today was nothing of the sort. If I wasn't standing up I would have fallen asleep from sheer boredom.
"Can't we do something different Gar'han? These lessons are so long and boring." I whined. I felt like swimming. It was pretty hot out today and my hair was sticking to my sweaty face.
"Eltu Si, you need to learn this. The tsko swizaw is not only one of the Na'vi's most important weapons but it is also a tool. Without it your chances of survival are slim." He said seriously. "Now, nìmun." (again)
"But-"
"Nìmun!"
Why is he so pushy?
I gritted my teeth and pulled back the arrow and released. It didn't even hit the target. I was pathetic. We had gradually begun to move further away from the target and from where we were standing there was now way I would ever hit it right.
"Are you concentrating?" Gar'han asked, obviously wandering why I sucked so bad.
"Yes!" I groaned. "I just suck!" I complained wanting to throw the stupid bow and arrow on the ground and repeatedly stomp on it like a brat.
"You what?" Gar'han asked, clearly confused by my term.
"I said I suck. I'm no good at this." I mumbled suppressing a hot blush.
Gar'han blinked for a moment, "You just need practice."
I suppressed a groan. All we did was practice. "I think we should take a break." I declared.
"You have been saying that since we started." Gar'han grunted.
"And you have been saying no since we started." I complained. "It's hot. Aren't you hot?" I complained. Wow, I was really being a brat.
Gar'han opened his mouth to deliver what I'm sure would have been a well thought out explanation of the importance of learning BUT he cut off by a sudden, loud screeching noise.
I yelped in surprise and dropped the arrow. "What was tha-", I was cut off by another long screech. It sounded like it was coming from above the trees. Was it an animal?
"Myweh, Jessy. It is an Ikran." Once again a loud screeching resounded threw the forest, and was overlapped by another one of a different tone. "And from the sound of it, there are more then one."
What was a mountain Banshee doing out here? The Horse Clan didn't ride banshee and we were far away from the Hallelujah mountains. "Why are they all the way out here?" I asked, slinging the bow back over my shoulder.
Gar'han's eyes stayed towards the sky. Just then a few Ikrans passed overhead, there shadows scraping across the trees. They seemed to be headed towards our home. I could tell from where I was that there were riders on their backs. "I don't know but we are about to find out." He said and then called for his mount. I did the same and quickly saddled onto the back of Helen."Come," Gar'han ordered before dashing in the direction the Ikran's had left in with me following close behind.
When we reached base camp there seemed to be a stir among the Na'vi. Several Na'vi were emerging from thier tents to see what all the ruckus was about. A large group of the Na'vi seemed to be crowded around something big. When my eyes focused in on what it was, and I noticed a leathery wing ruffle, I realized that I was looking at an Ikran. Two Ikrans actually. The riders had seemed to have dismounted and one was speaking with Tali. The other one was listening to their conversation with crossed arms.
Both Gar'han and I dismounted quickly. "They are from my clan," Gar'han said to me as we approached they crowd. The Na'vi man with crossed arms was the first to notice us approaching. Well not us. Gar'han.
"Gar'han." He belowed with a smile when we reached them. The other Na'vi, which was a woman, continued to speak with Tali.
Gar'han met his eyes with recognition and greeted him also. "Kaltxì, Dilo. It's been too long." So they knew eachother? Gar'han gave the man a quick embrace before pulling back. "Not that I am not happy to see you but what are you doing here?" Gare'han enquired.
The man hesitated and his eyes landed on me as if just now noticing I was there. His eyes went back to Gar'hanss almost questioningly but he answered Gar'han. "Come with me brother, we must speak in private." I was guessing that whatever he had to say, he didn't want me to hear. Gar'han gave Dilo a short nod before turning to me.
"I won't be gone long." Gar'han said to me.
Dilo nudged his female companion who finally paused her conversation to look at him questioningly before he motioned for her to follow him. The woman looked past Dilo's shoulder to see Gar'han then gave Dilo a nod. All three strode to a large tent near the far end of the base camp before disapearing inside.
I stood there for a moment unsure of what to do while I waited for Gar'han. Before I could start to feel anxious I noticed Fara and Ja'ki were apart of the crowd of Na'vi that was beggining to disperse. I met Fara's eyes and she waved me over to her.
I went over to join the two. "Do you know why they are here?" I asked her.
She shrugged, just as confused as me. "Whatever reason, it must be important. The Omiticaya clan do not visit us often."
I bit my lip, starting to feel slight worry. What were they saying to Gar'han right now? The suspense was killing me. I noticed Tali begining to leave but I quickly said goodbye to Jaki and Fara before catching up to her.
"Tali, why are those men here? Fara says that the Omticaya clan doesn't visit often." I said as I walked beside her.
"This is true. We rarely see our sister clan because of the long distance between us. Sometimes only a few times a year." Tali said. She seemed a bit distracted. If I wasn't mistaken, I saw worry in her eyes.
"Then why are they here now?" I urged. She must know something. I had seen her talking to woman Na'vi.
She came to a slow stop as we both noticed Gar'han, Diloh and the woman emerging from the tent. I locked eyes with Gar'han and I immediatley knew something was wrong. His expression was strange...a cross between worry, surprise and something else.
"They have come to collect Gar'han," Tali answered from my side, still seeming distracted. They were taking Gar'han? Why?
I scrunched my forehead in confusion. "To collect him? You mean Gar'han is leaving?"
"Yes."
A/N: Phew! Now that was a big-butt chapter. I usually shy away from long chapters because I miss more mistakes but this one just had to be long. Sorry. I'm pretty excited to get this next chapter written soooo...no more ridiculously late updates? Maybe? No matter what, I'm not quitting this story until it's completely finished. Promise :)
Please leave me a review and let me know how ya'll feel about this chapter! Hang in there!