iLie Awake

It was a rough night. Carly Shay felt schizophrenic. She didn't know what she wanted. She simultaneously prayed for both rest and redemption, knowing she could have only one. She was with Sam, warm and comfortable, which, under normal circumstances, would have been enough to allow her to drift off, dreaming sweetly of their future together. Tonight was anything but normal. Tonight, there was no sleep to be had. She had slept most of the day away, which obviously exacerbated the problem, but whenever sleep did come, it was fitful and short-lived. She clung to Sam's bare torso tightly, praying to God that the sun would rise before her body succumbed to sleep again. She whispered into her love's naked shoulder.

"Sam… I love you… I love you… I love you… I love you… I love you…" Carly was manic.

She had always teased Sam for her nightmare about the Soup Monster. It sounded so silly – until Carly realized what Sam's nightmare truly meant. Carly Shay was the soup. All of these years, it was Carly she feared would be taken from her. The shoe was now on the other foot.

She kissed Sam's neck, not wanting her to wake, but praying she would understand if she did.

"Don't leave me… Don't leave me… Don't leave me…" She began to cry again, though less than the first time it happened. It had happened, by her count, seven times tonight already. Seven times, it was the same, yet different. Seven times it was different, though the end result was Carly, electricity coursing through her veins, terrified.

She knew where the nightmare began. She was in a deserted amusement park. It was always the same, always the Hall of Mirrors. There was barely enough light for her to see. The buzz of electricity was in the air. Everywhere she turned, there were mirrors. There were short mirrors and warped mirrors. There were more mirrors than she had ever seen. The building, which seemed to go on indefinitely in all directions, must have housed thousands of mirrors of every size and description. Off in the distance, Carly heard the same thing she always heard. It was the only thing for which she would endure. It was Sam Puckett, and she was screaming.

"CARLS! HELP ME!"

"Oh no…" Her voice reverberated in her own head. It had happened again.

Everywhere she looked, Carly saw Sam Puckett. In every corner of the room, there were Sam Pucketts, all begging for her help – thousands of them. There was no way in the world that she could save them all, as much as she wanted to. There was simply not enough time. She knew what would happen next. Knowing what was coming didn't make it any less traumatic. It was, if anything, far more traumatic to have precognition of everything that was to come. She knew full well that she was powerless against it. Off in the distance, Carly heard shattering glass. Sam Puckett was torn asunder.

She was hyperventilating now. She burst into a run. No help. Wherever she turned, Carly faced uncertainty. No matter which direction she turned, she felt like the walls were closing in – sealing her inside.

Shattering Glass. Sam Puckett has ceased to be. Spider-webbing. Another one bites the dust.

She was hyperventilating, sweating now.

"I'm coming! Where are you?" She screamed, if only to herself.

"CARLS!"

"Sam!"

"I'm right here!"

She had been through this all before. For every Sam she attempted to save, she was seconds too late. They all were obliterated, just inches from her fingertips. It was torture. This was cruel and inhuman punishment of the highest order, and she didn't have the slightest idea why she would be made to suffer this way. Why should it be Sam Puckett – Her Sam – who was taken and forced to endure this? Why couldn't it be her, Carly? She instantly knew why. It couldn't be the other way around because, if it were, this sadistic game would fail. Sam Puckett would win and Carly Shay would be safe. It needed to be this way because games of chance always favored The House.

She was running in circles for what felt like hours. She was sore. She was tired. She was beaten and battered, running through this maze of darkness. She had spent most of her life in Seattle, where fog was nearly a daily occurrence, but never before had she felt such fear of the unknown. She could barely see six inches in front of her face, but Carly pressed on. Her soul told her that she had to, no matter what the cost.

She heard the faint buzz of electricity again.

"CARLY! HELP ME!"

Carly turned on her heel, in the direction she swore Sam's voice was coming from, only to have her cheekbone connect with a wall in the darkness. It would either be broken, and if not, it would certainly swell. She didn't care. She would take whatever abuse she had to, just so long as she was reunited with the one she had lost. She was afraid she may have cracked a tooth.

"SAM!"

This was different. This wasn't like the other times. Nothing about this was right.

"What the hell is going on? Where's Sam? I need my Sam! Where's Sam?"

This was beyond different. This was nowhere near right. This wasn't how it ended...

Then, Carly heard it – the sound that made her blood run cold. She could hear the slow, methodical, deliberate cracking of glass. It was as though she was on a frozen lake and each step took her closer and closer to the inevitable. She took the slightest, most delicate step possible. Crack. Crack. Crack. Crack. Crack. She stepped. It broke. Then, without warning, her entire world was torn apart.

She took the slowest, deepest, most measured breath. She exhaled cautiously. The entire room imploded. Carly was falling. She was falling, dark and fast, further and further away from the only thing she would ever need – the air that would fill her lungs every waking moment. She screamed.

Carly Shay was in bed. She was bolt upright. She was sweaty and hyperventilating, but she was alive.

"No…. No….Sweet God, No…. Sam…." Carly pulled her knees into her chest, rocking, shaking the cobwebs from her brain.

"I'm right here, Cupcake… I'm fine… I'm right here, Sweetheart… Everything's okay…"

Sam Puckett was wide awake, holding her love by the shoulders. It was what she needed. Carly would always be her priority. She knew that this would keep happening. She knew, but she had the answers. She would always have the answers Carly needed. She pulled her close and kissed her forehead.

"It's four in the morning, Cupcake… It was just a bad dream, a very, very bad dream. Everything is going to be fine. C'mon, take a few deep breaths and try to get some rest. Mama's here. Mama's here…"

Instantly, warmth washed over Carly Shay. It was just a nightmare. It was the most horrible nightmare imaginable. It was horrible, but none of it was real. She let herself fall sidelong into Sam's chest. She knew she could sleep now.