Chapter 4 - RPOV

Emmett got home from the meeting in a happy mood. It was over for another week and he could now relax and do what he wanted. He entered the sitting room bursting with joy where he saw me, sat on the sofa where I'd been for the last three hours. I hadn't moved, the album was open on my lap and the tears were rolling down my cheeks in continuous streams.

His face fell when he saw me like this. I wasn't a big crier, and I had never broken down completely like this before. Well, at least not since the day our baby had been taken from us.

"What's wrong," he asked coming to sit down beside me.

"Savannah Karlie," I sobbed as a new wave of tears spilled over my lashes.

"Shh, it'll be alright," he said pulling my head into my chest and rocking me like he did with the girls when they were upset, "I should have remembered that box was up there and not let you touch it."

"I want her back where she belongs: with us," I croaked, my voice hoarse from crying.

"I know, I know. But, she may have another family now, and it would be wrong of us to intrude," he said stroking my hair.

"I don't care. I'm selfish, I always have been. I don't want anyone else to have my baby girl. In fact I can't believe we've lived so long without her and pretended it was normal. We should have fought harder for her. It was my fault she went."

"Don't blame yourself sweetheart, we had to do it. Your mother had a cold heart and she would have never given in and let us keep our baby. It would have been too scandalous to have in her family. It would have affected her social standing," he told me what I already knew, but it felt better to hear it from someone else.

"But how could we have forgotten so much and carried on with our lives?" I asked between sobs.

"We had to move on. Besides, when you got pregnant with the twins it wouldn't have been fair to them if we were still in grievance over her; especially as you risked so much to have them and afterwards they didn't see their mother until they were six months old and even then you couldn't care for them. But that was never your fault, you couldn't help it: I was just saying that the twins need you more than she does especially if she has another family," he said trying to make it sound like it wasn't my fault, but I knew it was.

I smiled at him through the tears. He was so sweet when he was comforting me; it was a rare moment of romance because Emmett was never the romantic.

"No that's true. Maybe I couldn't help the post natal depression, but I shouldn't linger too much on the past and I should try and look forward to the future with my girls. But I would only be complete if Savannah were there as well. Do you think they even kept her name?" I asked.

"I'm sure they did Rosie. They can't ignore our request for our daughter to keep the name we've chosen can they?" he answered with another question.

"Well we had just left her there alone, so I wouldn't be surprised if they did," I said before I stood up and got a tissue from the box on the table.

I wiped my eyes and went to look at myself in the mirror. I looked a state. My eyes were red and puffy from crying and my cheeks were stained with tears. Thankfully my lashes were dark and long enough for me not to wear mascara or I would have looked like a deformed panda.

"Oh I look dreadful and the girls will be home any minute!" I gasped.

"Honey I think you look gorgeous," Emmett said sliding his arms around my waist and kissing my cheeks.

I pulled away and went upstairs to my dressing room to compose myself before the twins came home full of juvenile stories of ballet. When I came down twenty minutes later they were just coming in the door, dragging their bags and taking their shoes off.

"Mummy!" Jessica shouted throwing herself into my arms.

Jess was always one to draw attention to herself, and in that aspect she reminded me of my mother. She was the leader: first born and stubborn but I loved her fiery temper and her extrovert personality.

"Mama," Alice said quietly as she wriggled her way next to Jess in my arms.

Alice was small for her age, and I think the birth order added to her nature. She was always shy and looked to her sister when meeting new people, but once you got to know her she was like a happy bouncy ball; completely mad and continuously hyper. However she was my dedicated shopping partner and she'd always tell me what she thought of my new designs. Jess had the attention span of a goldfish, and found shopping boring. She was a daddy's girl, and my youngest baby was a mummy's girl through and through.

This of course led me to wonder what Savannah would have been; but with some unknown force I managed to choke back my sobs and blink away the tears that threatened to fall. Emmett saw this and scooped both his girls up in his arms, asking them how their day had been as he took them off for a bath. He was the perfect husband, and I was so lucky to have him.

When both the girls were tucked up in bed, fast asleep Emmett came up to me and put his hand on my shoulder.

"Rosalie," he said using the name that no-one but my mother had ever called me, "I know this may sound stupid, but I thought you'd want to know. You see, there's an open day at the adoption centre in the city. The same one we left Savannah at, and I know it's crazy and wishful bit would you like to go?"

"Oh Emmett, I'd love too," I said and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"Well I've checked that Audrey is free to look after the twins and well, it's tomorrow," he said sheepishly.

Of course that was fabulous and I had the faintest hope that she would be there and willing to come home with us. But, I was nervous about the possibility of seeing my baby after so long. Tomorrow couldn't have seemed further away.

How do you think Savannah will react, and please review! I want to know how you want Savannah to behave when she finally meets her mother. Thank-you XxX