A/N: This chapter has only been partially beta'ed. I decided to post it anyway due to the fact that I promised (indeed) when it reached forty reviews. I want to send out a BIG thanks to xdarkangeltwinsx for beta'ing it. Also, I want to send out another giant thanks to my friend, who put up with me when I babbled about it and helped me tremendously. She also came up with the basic idea for the dream. :D
I'll dedicate this to all of you that reviewed. I love all of you guys so incredibly much.
Every night, there was the same agonizing need for him. Harry James Potter, idol of worship for so many, and within my reach. He adored me, and loved me relentlessly no matter how many times I tried to stubbornly prove I would never feel the same way.
Green eyes haunted me to no end, piercing and vivid, making every other color dreary. Images of ruffled raven-black hair and Quidditch-callused hands followed me where I went. Nonexistent kisses adorned my body, and with each flutter of my eyelids, I cursed myself.
As odd as it was, I had never noticed how the lake played on room's lighting. I guess I never really had a reason to before now. The water danced above, the tinted lights creating strange, greenish patterns around it. It seemed fittingly Slytherin. They danced around the room, eventually fading to an eerie glow.
After spending two hours in the Common Room waiting for Pansy, it was a wonder I couldn't list every detail of the room. Now I knew the fireplace had two-hundred and eighty-three bricks surrounding it. Five objects lay scattered on the table in the corner, two of them books, one opened to page 188 and the other opened to 721. And the flames had loudly cackled a total of eighteen times since I had started counting several minutes ago.
Had anyone asked what I was doing, I probably would have told them that I was mad. I was becoming uncertain about my sanity myself. Here I was waiting for a girl I didn't even particularly care about to come back just so I could apologize for something I rightly did. I was on the losing side of logic's battle. But still, I waited.
And waited.
And – no surprise – waited some more. When I finally thought boredom could be a cause of death, Pansy had finally come, bags from Zonko's and Honeydukes clutched in her hands. At least someone had a good time at Hogsmeade. The moment she saw me, however, her jubilant smirk faded into a sneer.
"Pansy, I'm incredibly sorry." There was no excusing my lack of sanity; I was apologizing – and heartily so. She seemed not to notice this, and instead turned her nose upward and pursed her lips.
"You know, you almost look cute when you pout." The words nearly caused me to gag. As far as compliments went, it was rare and considered an honor for any flattering remarks to even touch these lips. Having something as revoltingly 'adorable' as that even uttered was as rare as seeing Weasley show a shred of intelligence.
"You left me there, Draco! And you won't even tell me who!" She looked clenched her fists angrily and let her eyes be consumed by livid flames.
"I can't!" My teeth ground together. She was become increasingly frustrating.
"Do you think I'm an idiot? Of course you can! What did you do, take the Unbreakable Vow with Potter? I swear on Salazar's grave, you are the most intolerable person I have ever met."
"Obviously you haven't looked in a mirror recently," I hissed. As soon as the words escaped my lips, I knew I had crossed a line.
"Bastard!" She stormed off upstairs, slamming the door behind her. I attempted to follow, but the stairs turned into a slide. Although I attempted to crawl up, after a moment or two of failing, I pitifully gave up. After sliding to the bottom, I let myself lay there in a crumpled ball for a moment. Somehow I had a feeling she was planning something that wouldn't exactly bode well with me. Pansy had never been known for being kind to those who had insulted her.
Instead of attempting to worry about what would come tomorrow morning, I gathered myself, glad that no one had been there to witness the mess I had become. In fact, my eyes were sore, and I rubbed them energetically, making my way up to my four-poster bed. Sleep was exactly what I needed to get through this. Cursing, I thought of what would come the moment I drifted off into that other world. Maybe if I was lucky, it'd be a dreamless night.
I reached into my robes to get my wand out of my robe pockets and place it on my dresser. It was gone. Shit! Potter had it! This was perhaps one of the most miserable days of my life. I was not looking forward to tomorrow, either.
I lay in bed for a while, trying to clear my mind of any thoughts, but soon found that to be impossible. Blaise came upstairs after a while, and was followed by Crabbe and Goyle. Nott came last, yawning while holding his Transfigurations book. I feigned sleep, and no one seemed to notice. Once they had fallen asleep, it was back to counting. Currently, my focus was the number of knots in the wood above my four-poster.
One. Two. …Forty-eight. Two hundred and six. It didn't really make a difference, but it did pass time. And slowly, but surely, it lulled me to sleep.
I never realized how indescribably amazing someone could look in a simple white button-up shirt. It glowed against his tanned skin, and seemed uncannily bright compared to the rich, creamy black of his hair. He wasn't wearing any glasses, and his eyes only seemed to glow brighter. An innocent smile twitched his lips upward, and small dimples formed, creating that completely untouchable illusion. I couldn't help but lean forward to brush my lips against up, and I saw a towering tree, the tip obscured behind the other ones, which beside this seemed tiny. And as if someone had somehow planned it out, I had an epiphany. "You want me to climb this?" There was no response other than the blowing of the wind in the trees, but I knew I was right.
But he evaded me, gracefully pulling backward with an inviting smile. Though he said no words, he would every few steps look back at me, and his hand lifted up with the elegance of an angel, beckoning me forward. I found myself chasing after him like some loyal puppy, and magnetically pulled by that dimpled smile.
I didn't remember ever going outside to the grounds, but before I knew it, my feet were padding on the soft grass. The moon glowed in every dew drop, illuminating every strand of grass, leaf – even the curving buttresses of the castle – with miniscule crystals. He kept on evading me, that sweet smile so immobile on his face that I couldn't help but wonder if it had been painted there.
A branch cracked under my feet, and with a start, I realized that we were in the Forbidden Forest. I opened my mouth to say something, but a single finger pressed to his lips caught the words in my mouth. Then, with a glance around, he spoke.
"Wait right here." It was a husky whisper, and I felt a shiver pull down my spine. With those words, he vanished behind a tree. A minute passed in unnatural silence. Then, two. With small, uncertain steps, I walked forward and peered behind the tree. No one was there.
"Harry?" No one replied. I began to continue on, the only sounds echoing in my ears being the crunch of my feet against the forest floor and my increasingly unsteady breathing. Tree after tree passed, and with each step the glistening of the moon seemed to shrink as the trees became denser.
"Harry?" A crack of a branch echoed in front of me, and I dashed toward it, madly ripping at branches that stood in my way. Several more branches snapped from ahead, each one sounding increasingly more distant. My legs hit against the ground with more and more speed, until I found myself frantically running, ignoring the painful tugs of the branches against my skin. But they still became fainter, until they disappeared altogether.
"Harry?" I looked around, but as expected, he was nowhere to be found. And to top matters off, I realized I had no clue where I was. Somehow I had managed to get myself lost in the middle of the Forbidden Forest.
"Look up." The words were whispered into my left ear, and I turned around to face –
No one was there. My head turned up, and I saw a towering tree, the tip obscured behind the other ones, which beside this seemed tiny. And as if someone had somehow planned it out, I had an epiphany. "You want me to climb this?" There was no response other than the blowing of the wind in the trees, but I knew I was right.
Almost on cue, the rain began to pour, pelting down like buckets upon buckets of water. My eyes screwed shut for a moment as I felt the water cling to my skin, gliding down it in warm, little trickles. My breath had steadied, and with a sigh, I opened my eyes once more, determined to reach the very top of that tree. Apparently, without a wand, as well.
My hands grabbed onto the bark, and ignoring the way the protruding wood would press against the palms of my hands, scraping against it and breaking skin as they slid, I pulled myself up onto the branch. Only a hundred or so to go. Every time I slipped, I made sure to one hold on tighter to the next branch. Soon my entire body shook, rain seeming to seep all the way into my bones. Still, I braved on relentlessly. I couldn't give up.
And as a reward, the treetop unfolded itself, leaving me with a clear view of the night sky. Rain continued to fall in torrents, and I gritted my teeth. "Where are you, Harry?"
"Look up." Through nearly-shut eyes, I faced the sky. The rain almost obscured my view, but through squinted eyes I saw a – off all colors – green shooting star pass the sky. I could recognize the hue of Harry's eyes anywhere.
My eyes snapped open, but I woke with a groggy sigh. Whatever had that dream been about? After all, I could understand if my mind dwelled upon his kiss; it certainly had been a whole lot better than any I'd had with Pansy. It bothered me that I couldn't stop thinking or dreaming about it, but it made a whole lot more sense than the dream I'd just had. Still, dwelling upon it wouldn't work just now; I currently had enough to deal with.
I'd have to find time after Potions to get my wand back. My goal was the get it and get away from him as fast as possible. Hopefully, he wouldn't be with Granger or Weasley; although, knowing my luck and usual circumstances, he most certainly would be. And to top it all off, I seemed to be getting a headache. "Lovely," I moaned, and got up to see Blaise staring at me.
"What's lovely?"
"I – erm…" I couldn't think of anything to say that wouldn't just make matters worse.
"Pansy?" Thank Gods, I did have an excuse!
"Yeah. She seemed pretty angry at me last night." Awkwardly running my fingers through my hair, I attempted to seem distraught. It wasn't that hard since I already dreaded what was coming.
"I talked to her. I'd avoid her this morning, if you can. I'm fairly sure if you try talking to her, she'll send a curse your way. She'll shrug it off quickly, though. It's Pansy, after all. She practically adores you." I refrained from adding, 'She isn't the only one.'
"Well, we'll see. I guess I'd better get to breakfast soon, then."
"Yeah, I'll meet you down there." He sighed, and plopped back down into his pillows. "In a bit."
The Great Hall was practically empty. No familiar viridescent eyes sat at the Gryffindor table. In fact, I almost wished they were there. Now would have been a perfect time to get my wand. But, as luck would have it, I would have to wait until Potions class. That was unless he came alone before Blaise, which was highly unlikely. Bloody brilliant! I gave a cynical sneer and stabbed my eggs.
Blaise came when I was finishing eating. I sighed, angry that Potter still wasn't here. Now that he had come, it would be impossible to ask until classes had started.
"Oi, you'd better get out of here soon. Pansy's coming, and apparently she spent last night crying." This surprised me. Pansy may have complained all the time, but I had never seen her shed a tear. Obviously, I had upset her more than I had realized. "Although, I heard she was soothed when talking about the compliments you gave her. Now would be a great time to drop the l word." Who was Blaise – of all people – to give me advice on dating? And why in the world would I claim that I loved anyone?
"Thanks. I'll go." Getting up, I stalked to Potions class. Snape sat inside, grading papers.
"Mr. Malfoy, you're early again. Are you quite sure there's nothing bothering you?" His eyebrow arched as it always did when he was suspicious. Still, the idea of talking to him, of all people, about Potter seemed laughable. At least, it would be laughable if it weren't concerning me. He was the only person who seemed to hate Potter more than I did.
"Did we have any work due today?" It was a pitiful excuse of a question; I knew we didn't.
"No, we didn't. I would expect you to know that." His lips formed a condescending sneer for a moment.
"I'm just distracted. Trivial matters – I don't want to disturb you, Sir." He seemed satisfied with the answer, and I figured Pansy's temper would prove the idea of the problems being frivolous. After all, relationship issues weren't really something for Professors to mettle with.
My hands tapped nervously at the desk, and when people began filing in, I couldn't help but hope Pansy might decide not to come. As was inevitable, she did come. However, considering she had been crying, she seemed more relaxed than I had anticipated. In fact, though she gave me a glare, she otherwise ignored me, something better than what I figured she'd be like: screaming and throwing a fit. I guess Blaise was right in saying that she did adore me.
I barely got through class, still. A certain pair of jade eyes constantly was constantly kept glued to me. It took all my effort to focus on the potion and not mess up any ingredients, as I had last week. I managed to accomplish it successfully, and as everyone else filed out, I slowly hung back. It was time to get my wand. At least Granger and Weasley were nowhere in sight.
We were the last to leave class, and both of us seemed to drag behind slowly enough that the hallway emptied. He faced me, and I crossed my arms over my chest, attempting to keep my face expressionless. The two of us were alone in a hallway. Gods know what could happen! My heart seemed to jump to my throat.
"My wand, Potter?" A fleeting look of indecision passed across his face. Rather than reaching into his pocket, he virtually lunged at me.
My gasp of shock was cut off as lips met mine. The very touch of his lips embracing mine made me melt in his hands. I could taste his lips, and they gave off an electric zing and fiery passion. It was so utterly and indescribably Harry. His tongue pressed at my lips, and they willingly parted. My mind was gripped with that same madness as in my dreams.
I was momentarily lost as his tongue grazed against mine, but suddenly, as if something had been ignited within me or some instinct had kicked in, my tongue began to wrestle his. His mouth was sculpted exactly as it had been in my dreams, and it tasted of something peppermint-vanilla. So sweet, I had to taste it, explore every flavor like an obsessive chef. My mind murmured his name, whispering the words in a fervent caress. Possessively, my fingers tugged at that marvelous hair, and I groaned as our bodies made contact through the robes. My eyes fluttered shut, and a shudder went through my body as lips sluggishly pulled down my lips and to my cheekbone. Then, down to my neck.
Before I knew it, I was pressed against a wall, and my lips mouthed his name in rhythm with my thoughts. "Harry. Harry. Harry."
"Draco, are you – what the bloody hell are you doing?" Pansy had come down to look for me, and had caught me kissing none other than Harry James Potter, supposedly, my center of all stress and misery.
"Pansy, I can explain," I heaved out, breath coming in unsteady whispers.
"Is that why you couldn't tell me who had broken his heart? Because it was you?" Potter just stood there, unsure of what to say, if even anything. Even I didn't know what to say. And before I could gather my thoughts enough to say something, anything, she had fled, the billowing cape just rounding the corner before disappearing.
"Fuck, fuck, bloody fuck!" I kicked my bag, which had – without my recollection – been placed on the ground.
"Draco, calm down." His hand steadied on my arm, and he looked at me from behind slightly crooked glasses.
"How can I calm down? She's going to tell the whole fucking school! This is all your fault. You and your, your –"
"My kissing?"
"Whatever it was, why couldn't you just leave me the hell alone?" I slumped against the wall, feeling a terrible wave of reality wash over me. My head leaned against my knees and I pressed my face into my hands. He slid down beside me. A hand ran through my hair, and despite everything, as much as I wanted to loathe it, I loved it.
"Because I couldn't. Every time I saw you kissing her, I thought I'd go mad with jealousy. You may be a prat, but I think I'd forget how to smile if I didn't see your smirk." A smile graced those lips, and with it, my own lips twitched upward. It felt alien and impossible to smile. Leave it to Potter to find a way how. "And it doesn't matter anymore. She'll tell everyone, anyway. Might as well be able to kiss me when she does. I know you want to."
Those breaths wafted in my face, and I automatically buried my head into his shoulder, feeling solace in his touch. When had I softened so much? I was turning into a Hufflepuff.
"Well, don't expect that Gryffindor nonsense from me anytime soon."
"Don't worry, I won't."
"And cuddling is out of the question."
"I know that."
"And if you think I'm going to wear Muggle clothing aga–" His lips met mine, and he flipped over on top of me, legs straddling my waist. When he pulled back from the lingering kiss, I couldn't help but find that my breath had caught in my throat. "What was that for?"
"You were rambling." In response, all I could do was tangle my hand into his hair and kiss him again.
"But we probably should get to our next class."
"Divination?"
"Well, since she's already planning on telling the whole school, might as well go face them now." I sighed, but refused to let myself follow his antics and bury my face into his chest. And then I realized. "Shit."
"What now?" His hand reached out to trace my jawbone, and I couldn't help but give a slight smirk-ish smile. Though it quickly was replaced by a fleeting look of fear as I thought of what was to come.
"My father will hear about this. I'll have to go face him."
"You don't have to."
"You don't understand; if I don't, he'll find a way to drag me over to our house, and –" I cut off, shuddering at what he might do to me. "I'll have to go talk with him tonight. I can take Floo." I rolled my eyes, not wanting to worry Potter. "Let's just go." I went, but he didn't follow. At first I wondered if I had scared him, but upon turning around, I saw him beaming. "What is it?"
"I'll bet Trelawney never saw this coming." I grinned and chuckled.
"My dear boys, I knew this was coming for months!" she rather ironically exclaimed as we walked in. I rolled my eyes and let out an annoyed hiss of breath. She was so intolerable sometimes. Still, for a moment the class gazed unsteadily at us. Then, all of a sudden, everyone erupted into exclamations of disgust.
"Are you bloody serious, Harry? Malfoy?" I turned to find Finnegan's look of disbelief.
"We thought Parkinson was kidding." Lavender was repulsed. However, Pansy had indeed gotten back at me. I'd have no choice but to go to my dad's. Upon turning to her, I saw a self-satisfied smirk. Oh, I did loathe her!
"Could you have worse taste, Draco?" Nott muttered, his jaw open as if he might vomit. "Potter? A Gryffindor? With that mop on his head? Gods!" It looked as if protests were coming from both sides.
"Yeah!" Crabbe and Goyle weren't ones to make up their own clever remarks. In fact, despite the obviousness of the situation, they seemed oblivious as to what was happening. Figures.
Beside me, Potter's original courage was waning. His eyes bounced around and he grew anxious, like a rabbit being watched by a rather hungry wolf. Normally I would join in with the laughter, but for once, something concerned me when it came to him. So, to reassure him – although probably more myself – that this wasn't a mistake, I pulled him against me and kissed him. My tongue traced his lower lip, and he groaned, pressing into my body. A smirk formed, and I pressed further, into his mouth, exploring it like an eager spelunker. Soon his erection was apparent against my leg. The entire room was silent, eyes glued to us. Despite the fact that I had eyes only for him, I could see out of my peripheral vision as jaws dropped. With a slight reluctance, I pulled back.
"Any questions?" I asked the shocked class. No one made a sound and I sneered in triumph. "Come on, Potter, let's go sit with Weasley."
"Harry," he murmured quietly behind me.
"What?"
"You called me Potter."
"What do you expect?" I sat down beside Weasley, and silently Potter seated himself next to me.
"You could at least call him by his real name if he's gone through all the trouble to convince you that you love him," the redhead grumbled.
"I don't love anyone," I snapped back.
"Keep on telling yourself that. I might have known Malfoy was going to be stubborn."
"What exactly is that supposed to mean? And as if I'm going to do what a Weasley tells me to do! I don't see you calling me Draco.""
"Draco," Harry sighed, his tone warning and exasperated. There was a pause before he added, "Please" in a lower, more pleading voice.
"Fine then…Harry." The name sounded foreign. Calling him Potter had become such a routine, that calling him Harry seemed almost as if I were suddenly using his last name. My mind was confusing me. This day definitely provided plenty of new experiences.
"My boy, I believe you have the Sight!" Trelawney had appeared out of nowhere and stood above Weasley. "Quickly, look to see his future." She pointed at Po – Harry.
After a moment of indecision, he quickly looked up and said in mock horror, "He has the Grim!"
"I think you're right." Weasley might have finally met his equal in intelligence. Trelawney walked to the middle of the room wide-eyed, muttering something incoherent to herself before stumbling into a table. Several chuckles resounded throughout the room, but she didn't seem to notice them. In fact, she rambled on about Potter's – oh, alright, Harry's! – ultimate death. What else was to be expected?
"You have been plagued with the Grim! Oh, my dear boy, I am so sorry. Evil shall grasp you – an unexpected evil. In fact, this very night. Oh, plenty of pain! Such a courageous death!" I rolled my eyes. She might as well have been saying, 'Blah, blah, terrifying forces of evil ending your life, blah, blah.' It certainly sounded like the other eighty times she claimed he was on the verge of death.
But she kept on rambling. "Someone you trust very dearly will lead you to your death! Yes!" No need to be so excited about it. "You'll be in grave danger. My dear boy, don't leave your dormitory tonight!" Beside me, viridian eyes darkened. He shuddered and instinctively leaned into me. As much as my automatic reflex was to pull him away, I still found my hand curling around his waist protectively. Gods dammit! I was a Malfoy, and no one could treat someone I liked as if they were devoid of feelings!
Unexpectedly, she stopped, faced her desk, and strode over to it. Nobody said a word for a moment. Then, upon realizing she had ended her lessons, chatter broke out.
"Weasley, next time shut your mouth and say that something good's in his future."
"How was I supposed to know that she would get even loonier? We're being taught by a psychopath; this is ridiculous!" I buried my head into P – Harry's neck.
"Are you okay?" My breath hissed against his throat, and he nodded in response.
"Good, then I don't need to go any sappier." Pulling away, my smirk became more defined as he pouted.
"Draco…" The whine accompanied his pout.
"Harry…" I mock-whined back. His pout ceased, and a satisfied smile replaced it. "What?"
"You said my name." Dammit.
"I'll get you back for turning me into a sap. Just you watch your step, Harry James Potter."
A/N: Okay, people, I hope you liked it! I hope I fulfilled (I believe it was) Torchwoodfan13's request to make it longer. I'm not very good with length, even though I sometimes can't stand reading short chapters myself. Hehe, I guess I'm a hypocrite like that. -.-'
I'm not putting up the next chapter until I reach 50 reviews. I'm doing this for feedback. I really want to improve my writing, and I figured this was the way to go. Also, do you want to have another fluffy-ish chapter first or do you want some of the tension/issues to come up next chapter? I can go either way. I was going to do the first (since I spent five chapters leading up to this), but it's up to my lovely readers.
Oh, what did you think of the kiss? Huh, huh? I spent a while trying to perfect it, so I really hope it turned out well. :3
Considering I asked you for your favorite music, I might as well give mine. :) Yay for author-to-reviewer interaction! I actually listen a lot to soundtracks. My favorites are Pirates of the Caribbean, Shrek 2 (I'm lame like that), and Harry Potter. I also love musicals, so I listen to things like Rent, Les Miserables, Phantom of the Opera, and Wicked frequently. When I'm not listening to that, I'm usually listening to foreign music (Goran Bregovic or some French music). Currently, I'm obsessed with Tatoue moi by Mozart L'Opera Rock. Even if you don't understand the lyrics, I find the song really catchy. I just discovered Fireflies, and I must admit it is a pretty good song. I also like 21 Guns and Boulavard of Broken Dreams (both by Green Day). I'll really listen to anything, though.
What books (other than Harry Potter, of course), do you like?
Gee, I hope this author's note wasn't too long. XD