Thanks for all the reviews, you guys! He he, don't you think Rogue really is her daughter on the show? There really have been way too many clues for her not to be, in my opinion. This post switches tenses again, mainly because I wrote it out both ways and this way just flowed smoother, so bear with me on that ;) Hope you all enjoy, and don't worry, Remy will be along very soon...

~BQ


Chapter Twenty-Two:


The X-man known as Rogue has never known her real parents.

But she's known who her real family was. A kind, patient man with a dream of equality. A gentle, wise woman who controls the weather. A teacher who cares for his students as if they were his own flesh and blood. A loner who took a group of kids under his wing. Thirteen very different teenagers with very different powers, who were thrown together in one house. They all came together to create an odd, but effective little family.

And now she is faced with several difficult truths.

The mansion they called home is gone. Most of her friends are dead. Those that aren't are missing. She has no idea what has become of the Professor or Storm. She has no idea what will happen to Logan.

But she has accepted all of those things already. She doesn't like them, and she will probably never get over them, but she has accepted them.

What she is struggling to accept right now is the truth about her lineage, about a past that she cannot remember.

Mystique, the shape-shifter who tricked her, who manipulated her, who betrayed her trust, who murdered her friends and destroyed her home, is her mother. She doesn't know the hows or whys or even the wheres, she only knows that she is. She only knows that one of her worst enemies is the woman who gave her life. She has no idea who her father is, and she may never know.

But she does know who her brother is.

In some ways, it is so much easier for her to accept that Kurt is her brother than it is to accept that Mystique is her mother. From the very first time she met Kurt Wagner, she felt some kind of pull, something about him that seemed almost familiar. Sort of a Hey, don't I know you? But she hadn't, of course, even though she should have. Looking back, she could almost laugh at the irony of it. Before joining the X-men, when Kurt had ported in on her play rehearsal with Scott, she'd commented that he was like an annoying little brother, to which he'd stuck out his tongue in reply.

If only she'd known how right she was.

Oh, God how much she misses him in that moment. Misses his goofy smile, his dismissive laugh, his gentle eyes. She wants to take him in her arms and hold him, cry into his shoulder, have him whisper to her soothingly in German while she clutches tightly to his thin frame. That was how it should have been, how it was supposed to be. Brother and sister, an unbreakable team.

She hates Mystique for that most of all. Out of all the things the woman has done, including blowing up the Institute, she resents her most for keeping her brother from her. Logically, Rogue understands that Mystique could never have given Kurt to Irene, because the blue furred boy could not have lived a normal life in Caldecott. Perhaps that was why Rogue had been given to Irene in the first place, so that she could have the normal life that Mystique could not.

Still, Rogue knows she should have grown up with her brother. She wishes she had. In some ways, she wishes she'd grown up with her mother there, too. She hates herself for thinking it, but she wonders what her life would have been like if they had stayed a family.

Kurt and Ah would probably be evil mutant terrorists, she realizes with disgust.

But at least they would have been together, all of them.

It's weird, but Rogue has always felt a connection to both Mystique and Kurt. The strange tie to Mystique had been what led her to stay with the Brotherhood for as long as she had, and the bond she shared with Kurt had always made her feel closer to him than any of the other X-men, even Kitty. Now she knows why she has felt drawn to them both.

She also knows now what the dream she had the night after they had learned that Mystique was Kurt's mother meant. She'd seen herself at six years old, small and thin, bright green eyes and a dazzling smile, her long brown hair flying out behind her, the white streak falling in her eyes, as she swung on the wooden swing in the yard. Kurt had been there, too, also six years old, trying to climb up the side of the house. Mystique had been trying to get him to come down, frustrated and concerned. Kurt had been laughing, Rogue had been giggling. It had been an odd dream, and yet it had seemed perfectly normal for her to be having. When she'd woken up, she had shaken it off as just something her mind had dreamed up after running on a few hours of sleep for two days straight, mixing in the revelations about Kurt and Mystique's connection.

Now she wonders if it wasn't something more, if some part of her brain hadn't known the truth, probably from Mystique's memories.

Mah head is so screwed up, she moans to herself, shaking her head. Ah've got memories floatin' 'round in there from mah mother an' mah brother. Good Lord, now all Ah hafta do is find mah father, absorb him, an' it'll be a family reunion right here in mah head.

I'll pass on that, thanks, Carol snickers. Though this does explain a lot of things. No wonder you're the way you are, what with a psychotic terrorist for a mother.

Shut up, Danvers, Rogue growls angrily.

The only thing that could be more perfect was if it turned out that Magneto was your father, Carol laughs cruelly. That would be such poetic jus-

Annoyed, Rogue slams down her mental shields. She is tired, weary, the last thing she needs right now is Carol Danvers. She has enough to worry about, enough to try and cope with, without dealing with the other girl's bitterness, too.

Ah'm bitter enough for the both o' us, Rogue mutters to herself.

She tries to envision Mystique before her now, tries to focus her thoughts and feelings on what she would say to the woman who gave her life at this moment if she was in front of her. The woman who maniuplated her, who lied to her. The woman who destroyed the X-men, the only family she has ever really known.

She can only think of one thing to say.

"Why?" she murmurs. "Why didn't ya tell me?"

Part of her understands why she didn't. Mystique had no reason to tell her while they were living in the same house, there would always be time for that later. And after Rogue left, perhaps Mystique felt that her daughter had betrayed her, maybe she had been hurt by Rogue's departure. Or maybe Mystique had just realized that she was better off with Xavier, and that it was too soon to put this burden on Rogue's shoulders, especially when she still harbored resentment for the woman's betrayal. Whatever Mystique's reasons for not telling her are, Rogue is certain of one thing; she did have them.

Still, another part of her is angry that she was kept in the dark, that she was lied to yet again. Mystique had told Kurt the truth about his past, so why didn't she do the same for Rogue? If she is being completely honest with herself, Rogue supposes that she is jealous. In an odd, twisted sort of way. She dislikes Mystique, she's angry at the woman for betraying her, and yet it hurts to think that her mother might have wanted a relationship with Kurt and not with her.

Not that she could exactly blame Mystique for that. She had just up and left the Brotherhood after that field trip. The one where she learned that she had been lied to. After that, she was very rarely polite to the woman, even when she was in her Principal Darkholme form.

Is that mah last name, too, then? she wonders, suddenly curious. Were Kurt and Ah born Darkholmes, before we were given away? In Mississippi, she had always just used Irene's last name, and when she had come to Bayville, she had simply gone by Rogue. It has never occurred to her until now, but Mystique must have used her influence as the principal to somehow allow her last name to be sealed. Rogue can just imagine what kind of story the shape-shifter had come up with to explain that.

Rogue Darkholme. She wishes it sounded repulsive, disgusting, but is shocked to find she rather likes the sound of it. She is even more horrified when she wonders what it would sound like with her real name, a name she has not used in connection with herself in years.

Ah wonder if Mystique gave me that name, she thinks with a frown. Or if it was Irene. She has a dim recollection of asking her foster mother once, when she was in elementary school, why she had chosen that particular name for her. Remembering Irene's answer, that her mother had described her as perfect, and that was why she had been given the name that meant "the perfect one", she decides it must have been Mystique. She has never understood why anyone would give her that name, not with who she was, what she was. Disturbingly enough, it makes her feel good to think that Mystique saw something in the little baby she had once been that had struck the woman as perfect.

Rogue doesn't know how to feel about Mystique anymore.

As her daughter, she has an instinctive, almost primal, urge to forgive her, to love her. But as an X-man, as Rogue, she isn't sure she can, and she isn't sure she wants to. Just because Mystique is her mother doesn't make what she did to her okay, if anything, it makes it worse. Rogue doesn't understand how someone, even Mystique, could do that to their own child.

Then again, she muses to herself. At least she didn't drop me in a river after lettin' Magneto experiment on me.

That in itself gives her another reason entirely to be angry with her mother, and with Magneto. The idea of anyone experimenting on Kurt has always upset her, but now that she knows he is her little brother, it infuriates her. How dare Magneto do that? How dare Mystique let him?

But that is the past, sixteen years in the past, and Rogue knows she cannot cling to it. She has more than enough reason to be angry with her mother as it is, and there are plenty of current reasons to dislike Magneto, even if he did give her the power to touch.

Rogue cannot help thinking about how her mother and Kurt would react to the news that she can now touch them. Would Mystique be happy for her? Would she want to touch her, for the first time in years? Maybe even hug her? Kurt, she knows, would pick her up and hug her, with one of those big, somewhat embarrassing bear hugs of his. He'd probably kiss her on the cheek, too, and run his furry little hands all over her face, amazed at being able to touch her.

She wonders if he knows about her, about their relation. Most likely not, unless Mystique has revealed it to him since her capture. For a foolish moment, Rogue dares to think that maybe, just maybe, Mystique might have panicked when she learned her daughter had been captured, that upon losing one child, she had opened herself up to the other. It was unlikely, but Rogue hopes it might be possible. She wants Kurt to know the truth, too, and she wants their mother to be there for him, at least, since she was never there for either of them in the past.

Then again, their mother is responsible for the deaths of so many people they loved...and part of Rogue cannot forgive her for that, cannot stand the thought of Kurt forgiving her for that, either. She wants Mystique to pay for her crimes, but at the same time, she wants to protect her.

How can she hate someone so fiercely and still love them?

She doesn't know, anymore than she does what she will do about this new revelation. When Magneto revealed that it had been Mystique who destroyed the mansion, Rogue had vowed to kill her. But now? Knowing that the woman was her mother?

Rogue has no idea what to do anymore.

Sighing, Rogue gazes out at the ocean, listening to the roar of the waves crashing down on the rocks below. Up here, all alone above the endless, mighty sea, she suddenly feels quite insignificant, just one tiny, little person in a world much bigger and much stronger than she.

Maybe a flight would do her some good.

She pushes to her feet and looks down at the rocks below. It is at least a fifty foot drop. Taking a deep breath, she steps off the edge, letting herself drop, the air ruffling her clothes as she falls. She stops herself inches from the rocks, letting the cool foam splash up on her bare legs, then takes off into the air, soaring out across the ocean.

The warm afternoon sun beats down on her back, shimmering on the water beneath her, and she smiles faintly to herself as the wind rustles her hair. It feels good to fly again, she can't even begin to explain how much. Flying has become a part of her, she does it now as easily as she breathes. And as she skims over the surface of the water, it shows.

It's so beautiful out here, she thinks to herself. Ah should take Remy out with me sometime, we could watch the sunset from out at sea.

She snickers to herself as she imagines his terrified expression if she were to fly straight up and then drop him. She would catch him, of course, she knew that she could do it easily, but it would be fun to see the look on his face when he thought she wasn't going to.

She stayed out for about half an hour, just flying through the warm air. She would soar upwards towards the sun, then dive back down towards the water, pulling up just in time to glide an inch over the surface. For the first time in her life, she knows how Ororo must feel when she floats through the sky, or how Kurt feels when he tumbles with his natural grace and agility. She's developed quite a knack for aerial acrobatics in the past few months.

With a happy sigh, she executes one last dive before turning and heading back for the island, which is a good ways away, flying low over the surf, just enjoying the wind in her hair and the feeling of weightlessness she gets whenever she flies.

Even with all of her troubles, Rogue has never felt more free than at this moment.