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Chapter 5

"Paul, what are you doing out here so far?" I asked stunned and still a little upset from running away from something that might not have even been there.

"just looking around" he said carmly but still had the angry look he always wears upon his face. I didn't know what to say, I was stunned by him and still a little jumpy from what just happened. then I remembered the promise I made to Jacob. I gasped at the thought of breaking a promise to Jake.

"ahh Paul i have to go" I said and walked past him.

"let me walk you home." he said, I could tell Sarah had talked to him again. I held back a whimper, I hated hurting people.

"no its fine." I said walking a bit faster, yet, he was still keeping up with ease.

"I'm not letting you walk home by yourself Emma, its getting dark." he order, the tone of his voice was strong.

He wasn't letting me out of this one. I sighed, knowing I couldn't win because I wouldn't be able to get away from him. He's so much bigger, faster and knows this place better then me. I had no chance of walking home by myself.

"well I have to walk is this-" I went to say pointing to the north.

"this way" he said, butting in and pointing a different way. I sighed and started walking the way he pointed. Without saying a word he followed close behind me, watching and listening to what was around us. I thought if I didn't speak to him it wasn't braking the promise I made to Jacob.

As we walked through the woods my feet started to get tired. The ground seemed more wet then before and my shoes were sinking in to the dirt and leafs. I could feel Paul's eyes on me, watching my every move yet also watching everything around us. I admired him for how much he cared but I wondered why he cared for me so much. Sarah cant be the only reason he cares, can she?

"you getting tired?" he asked and it straddled me from my thoughts.

"mmhmm" I said nodding. It only brakes if you say real words right?, I asked myself.

Before I could say anything he picked me up and put me on his back. His skin was hot and kept me warm, I was only wearing a sun-dress mind you. I bit my lip, not wanting to say real words but I had to, this was so much worse then talking.

"Paul you don't.. have to." I said and he smiled.

"I want to." he walked a bit faster. "its faster so I wont have to be with you for much longer." he teased. I was hurt at his comment and huffed, putting my head on his back and not talking to him anymore.

"aww don't act like that" he laughed and I pulled my arms tighter around his neck, telling him if he doesn't shut up I will choke him.

The way he carried me reminded me of when Jacob would do it when we were 12. When we would go to the beach for the whole day and I would get tired, he would carry me home.

~flash back~

The day was ending and the clouds were getting darker, the sun which was out for an hour today was long gone. The waves were rolling up to the drift wood now and sky was an orange pink colour at the horizon.

"come on Emmy." Jacob said dragging me off a rock, we were watching the sky fade in and out of different colours.

"I'm coming... jeez" I said grabbing our bag of stuff.

We walked side by side to the car park. suddenly Jacob's smile got wider.

"what?" I asked confused on why he was smiling so much.

"nothing." he said grinning.

"tell me" I said pushing him playing.

"ok ok" he looked around to see if anyone was there. "can I show you something?" I thought for a second.

"yeah ok, what is it?" I said cheerfully. He smiled and grabbed my hand, making me go a light shade of red.

He pulled me to a small dirt track. The forest was dark and I felt a little scared. I held on to Jakes hand tighter.

"don't worry Em, I wont let anything happen." he reassured me. I swallowed and nodded.

"but Sarah will kill us if we're not home now." I said making excuses so we didn't have to go up there.

"no she wont, come on" he said pulling me up the track. I walked closer to him, watching right head of me carefully.

He pulled me all the way up to the top of the track, it lead out to a cliff. He smiled and pulled me out to the edge. I clawed my hands in to Jacobs arm, scared we would fall. He laughed.

"we wont fall" he said moving away from the edge for me.

"how do you know?" I asked, he could tell I was scared.

"ok lets go sit here then." he rolled his eyes and sat me down against a tree.

We sat against the tree just watching the waves crash against the cliff wall. I watched Jacob more then the waves though. He shoulder length hair was still a little wet from swimming yet blow in the wind like it was weightless. I had a crash on Jake but didn't really understand the way I felt about him.

"what are you looking at" he said playfully. I quickly looked away.

"um nothing." I said and he laughed.

"come on we better get home, Billy has probably called Charlie by now." the name he spoke almost made me stop breathing and my stomach twisted and made me feel sick.

"oh sorry." Jake said with a 'I'm really sorry' smile.

As we got to the bottom of the creepy track Jacob slid his hand it to mine, but this time his fingers locked together in between mine and we were holding hands like a couple. The air got caught in my throat and my shyness was coming out. I looked at Jacob at the same time as he looked at me, we looked down quickly.

"can i umm piggy back you, you look tired?" Jake asked and I looked at him shocked.

"if you want" I said and he put me on his back.

~~~

We where about 5 minutes away from our houses when Jacob put me down and slid his hand back in to mine. We were just talking about random things like music and the new movies out, laughing about stupid jokes. He was trying to take my mind of the darkness around us.

"what about the time Quil slipped off the rock and fell face first in to the sand" Jacob said laughing.

"or what about the time Embry scared a cat and it attacked him" I said laughing even harder. We laughed so hard we let go of our hands to hold our stomachs.

We stopped laughing as we got to Jacobs door, he was waiting for Billy to burst out and yelled at him so i made the goodbye quick.

"see you tomorrow?" I asked. He smiled and pulled me in to a hug.

"of coures" he whispered. I smiled in to his hair and held on a little longer. we let go and looked at each other.

"best friends forever?" he said, it surprised me because normally girls would say that.

"forever" I said holding out my pinky finger. He shook it, back then we didn't have the 'shake it and you brake it' thing.

~flash back ended~

I opened my eyes at a familiar voice. It was Jacob but he was talking to someone, someone that wasn't Quil. It was a girls voice, my body tensed and bad thought come rushing back in and my head started hurting. I put my head in to Paul's neck in hope i wouldn't hear what they where saying.

Paul walked faster, he took the hint that I was hurt. As we hit the clearing away from Jacobs garage he put me down. It was now raining.

"Emma what's wrong?" he asked and I didn't answer. I went to walk inside but he stopped me.

"Emma tell me." he said trying to look me in the eyes but I looked away. By now we were soaked.

"Paul its ok, nothings wrong." I said and he shook his head, angery. He was starting to shake violently and mumbled something under his breath.

"EMMA IS THAT YOU" Sarah called from inside the house.

"YEAH" I called back, I turned around to say goodbye to Paul but he was gone. I looked around for a second but I couldn't see him anywhere.

I went to walk in side but I wanted to know if I was right about Jacob being with Bella.

He wouldn't lie to me would he?, I thought as I questioned if I should go over there or not.

It was a girls voice you heard, the other voice commented. It was right, I must go over there and see who he is with, who he would choose to hang out with instead of me.

I stood there and got the nerves to walk over there, I was going to use some lame excuse like we need surge or something like that. I slowly made me way a cross the clearing to his garage.

"maybe when the bikes are finished-our present to ourselves," the girls voice spoke.

"Deal. When will you bring them down?" a husky voice replied, the one that could only belong to Jacob. There was a slight purse.

"they're in my truck now," she spoke again. Her voice was soft, she sounded... broken.

"Great." Jake said in a happy high voice. What are they talking about?, i thought as I hide around the other side of the garage, out of site but still could hear everything very clear.

"Will Billy see if we bring them around?" she asked, not wanting to get caught with whatever they were talking about. I found a small crack in the side of the garage, I peeped through. I could only see Jacob.

He winked at the girl that was out of my sight range. "We'll be sneaky"

His words made me stomach twisted again, making me feel sick and made me want to just scream out in pain, I held it in until they left the garage and went east of the house.

After I couldn't' hear them anymore I let out a small sob, holding back the full emotions of sadness, jealously and confusion.

I covered my mouth with one hand and wrapped the other tightly around my ribs. My heart was ripping in two and I needed to just see Jacob smile, even if it wasn't to me. I took a deep breath as I heard them coming back. I peeped through in tiny crack again and just as I was hoping Jacob was smiling. My heart seemed to stop ripping but it was torn already.

"so we still on for the weekend" the girl spoke happily, yet, still sounded lost. Jealously was now the main emotion I was feeling, I found my eyebrows together in anger.

"of course, why wouldn't we be" Jacob replied to her, my heart tore again and I had to leave, it was unbearable hearing the words they shared with each other.

I quickly walked away from them, the cold, heavy rain drops covered the tears that escaped from my eyes -although my eyes were red- Sarah still wouldn't be fooled.

I got to the front door and fell on to the stairs. I wasn't sure who the girl was but I new something was going on, it could be anyone.

If its Bella, I will go against everything I have ever said about telling him everything and keep my mouth shut. If its someone another then Bella, I will bit my lip and spill everything I feel for him and hopefully he will feel the same, I thought as I bring up knees up to my chest.

What am I talking about, Jacob wouldn't go for someone like me. I'm just always going to be the best friend.

The rain was like someone was pouring a bucket of water from the heavens it was that heavy, the wind was picking up and it was now nothing but darkness. I felt cold, but not from the rain or wind, it was the cold, alone feeling. I was now back to the way I was when my mom died.

Is Jacob really drifting away from me?, I thought as I put my face in my hands.

I need to talk to someone, someone that understands how I feel, I thought and only one person came to mind.

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