Merry Christmas everyone! Here's an extra long chapter to celebrate the season.
The first thing she needed to do, Elsa decided, was give it a name. Well, technically the second thing she needed to do was give it a name. She'd already fed it a whole hunk of salted beef and a huge fillet of sea bass. Weakness that she'd thought came from the cold snow outside had mostly been from hunger, and the little dragon had bounced back rather quickly once his belly had been packed full of pilfered food. His? Her? Its? She really didn't know if it was a boy or a girl but… Elsa cocked her head at the way the dragon disdainfully sniffed at her pink bed curtains. It was probably a boy dragon.
"I don't suppose you already have a name?" she asked hopefully. The dragon perked up at the sound of her voice, and crooned… and then turned back to pawing at her curtains. "Of course not."
She was terrible at naming things. When she and Anna used to play Pretend, it was Anna who had to do most of the imagining—Elsa just couldn't get her mind around it; she named a snowman Olaf for heavens sake! The name was as common in Arendelle as dirt, and Anna had giggled at her for it, asking why she hadn't named him after the frost giants in the old tales that their mother told them before they went to sleep every night.
And then they'd had the accident and—
Elsa swallowed against the lump in her throat, trying to push the icy touch of Anna's skin on her hands out of her memory. She glanced at the dragon in the corner, who was now batting at the curtains like a kitten, mouth gaped open and tongue lolled out like a panting dog. What if she hurt him like she hurt Anna—what if one day she woke up to find the little guy frozen solid because she lost control during a bad dream?
Suddenly, keeping him seemed like a bad idea.
She looked outside, noting the rosy hint of the blue morning. It was nearly sunup, and if she went outside now someone would see her.
"I guess you get one more day." She told the dragon reluctantly, walking over to him and crouching low. She rubbed at his belly, smiling a little at the soft noises of happiness that he made at the motion. "And then it's back outside—"
There came a knock from the door, and Elsa jumped. It was a single knock, not the three rhythmic taps that Anna always used so that meant—
"Elsa? Are you awake?" Her mother's voice called through the door.
"Uh- yes. Just… give me a minute!" she said, panicking. Where could she hide him? Mother was here to help her get dressed, so the dressers and wardrobe weren't an option. Maybe her bed?
"Come here boy." Elsa whispered, gesturing at the dragon. He bounded over, his claws skidding on the flagstones. She pushed him towards the bed, ignoring his confused sounds. "Stay under here, alright?"
The dragon looked up at her, confused. He peeked out from beneath the fringe of her bed, the pink cloth resting like a nun's wimple on his little black head. "Hide." Elsa gently pushed his nose back beneath her bed, giving him an affectionate pat as she did.
"Elsa, I'm coming in!" her mother said. The door started to open (slowly; the hinges and doorframe were rusted and swollen from the constant freezing and melting) and Elsa had just enough time to launch herself across the room to sit at her vanity.
"Hello Mother." Elsa said calmly, swallowing against her heard pounding in her throat. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see a pair of bright green eyes peering at her from the shadows beneath the her four poster bed.
"Goodness, you're up early." The Queen of Arendelle smiled, sweeping across the room to stand behind her daughter in the mirror. She placed a warm hand on Elsa's shoulder. "I usually have to pry your sister out of bed in the mornings."
"Really?" Elsa asked and turned to look at her mother. When they had shared a room, Anna had always been up first; often she awoke before the sun even brushed over the mountains, to her elder sisters chagrin.
"Oh yes. She loathes mornings." Mother nodded, taking the silver backed brush from the vanity table with one hand and slipping the hair ribbon off of the end of Elsa's braid with the other. At the gentlest touch of the Queen's hand, Elsa's hair slipped out of her braid and framed her face. "And her hair is nothing like yours. I don't think your hair would tangle if I tied it in knots. Anna's on the other hand…" Mother shook her head ruefully. "That girl goes to bed with the tightest, most orderly braids and wakes up with a rats nest. It's incredible."
"I bet it takes hours for her to brush it out." Elsa said, and if her voice sounded a little forlorn her mother took no notice of it. So dramatic and sudden had her withdrawal from Anna's life that Elsa was acutely aware of how ignorant she was of her sister's habits and the little facts of her life. She was starved for the little stories mother told her, the off-handed comments of her father when he let her sit with him in his study. They were signs that she doing the right thing, and that her ever present fear and misery were worth it as long as Anna was happy.
"Oh yes. It drives her mad—she's so impatient, your sister." Mother said, deftly pinning Elsa's redone braid to her head. She was oblivious to her eldest daughters melancholy; Elsa had noticed the increased distance between her parents, a widening gulf that deepened every time she had an accident with her powers. Maybe, if she could just control it, they could all be a family again.
Which was why she was so angry every time she plunged her room into a premature winter. And why she sometimes felt like she could burst into tears any second—but she didn't dare while her parents were in the room. Instead of comforting her, they usually reminded her of the volatile nature of her powers and how she couldn't cry now, she might make it worse—
"Elsa? Are you listening?"
"Sorry Mother." Elsa said, robotically. Her voice was thick in her throat and she swallowed her tears roughly.
"Please listen, Elsa." Mother admonished, her back was turned so she didn't see Elsa's crumpled expression or hunched shoulders. "As I was saying, your tutor is sick today so no lessons." The 'so you'll be staying in your room today' was implied.
"Yes Mother." Elsa said.
"You're such a good girl." The Queen said, giving her a smile that was genuine, if strained. She moved to the door and jerked it open. "Breakfast will be up shortly." The door clicked quietly behind her.
As soon as she was alone, Elsa allowed her shoulders to shake freely. Salty tears dripped to the end of her nose and then crystalized into salty marbles that plopped onto her lap and rolled along the creases of her dress. Cold air billowed in time with her sobs, and only the knowledge that she was disappointing her parents and Anna again made her take a few measured breaths to try and halt the frost that was crawling up the walls.
"Don't feel." Elsa muttered, hiding her face in her arms and rocking. "Don't feel. Don't feel. Don't feel."
A rough, wet tongue lapped at her exposed hand, melting the frost adorning her knuckles.
"Wha-" Elsa looked up, only to find herself face to face with the little dragon that'd been obediently hiding beneath her bed until her mother left. His little tongue was lolly, and he was doing that animal-smile that was so utterly charming that Elsa could only laugh wetly. With a wet schick, his teeth disappeared, and he chewed playfully on her clothed arm, almost dragging her from the vanity chair.
"H-hey!" Elsa gasped, sputtering as he pressed heavy feet onto her stomach and driving all the air from her lungs. "You're heavy!"
The dragon ignored her and licked at her face, lapping all of the salt from her tears and making a throaty call that, if Elsa was asked, she would have to call laughter.
"Alright, alright." Elsa sniffed, smiling fully now. She rolled, tipping her new friend off of her and throwing her arm around his body. He was a comforting weight at her side, and he crooned when Elsa thrust her nose into his warm side. His tail wrapped protectively around her waist, and as Elsa breathed deep (he smelled like fire, pine, and snow), she felt the best she had in a while.
She supposed warm hugs would do that to people.