Mission 30: Strike
After all the ridiculous and annoying missions the Turks had to endure, they decided to go on strike. None of the Turks showed up for work and when Rufus called they demanded better missions and other things. The president was trying to reason with Tseng on the phone but it wasn't going well. "So basically, you're saying that you rather risk your life in a war of bullets and materia than do simple community service?"
"Yes!" Came the unanimous chorus from the phone, Tseng probably had the speaker on.
"You'll regret going on strike, you're all a bunch of ungrateful cowards!" Rufus Shinra was frustrated. "I'll just have to find some replacements and-" there was a knock on the door which caused the pretty president to let out an unmanly shriek. "Who's there?!"
"Number zero, five, four, eight, three, seven, with your coffee, sir," a female voice replied.
Rufus breathed deeply, he noticed that the call had disconnected and put the phone down on the receiver. He grumbled about the nerve of those ingrates for going on strike and hanging up on him, then strode to the door and opened it.
"You sure are gullible, that wasn't even a real employee number, I made it up!" Yuffie laughed victoriously.
"What are you doing here?" Rufus inquired with growing alarm.
"Reeve is cheap; he hardly pays me enough, so I'm doing some work on the side as a paid ninja mercenary." Yuffie grinned mischievously. "In other words, I'm here to kill you."
Rufus backed away, "there's no way you can win!" He prepared for the attack, but realized that he was so used to having the Turks protect him that he wasn't carrying any weapons or materia, and Yuffie's arrival was too coincidental. "Did the Turks send you?"
"Does it matter? You'll be a dead man soon anyway. Besides, do you know how many people are out to get you? The Turks' strike isn't completely public yet, but once that's out in the open everyone will know you're a sitting duck!" Yuffie had a point, without the Turks, killers and fan girls alike would go after Rufus.
Rufus continued to back away and frantically reached for the phone. Yuffie threw her shuriken, the blades cutting the phone cord then the shuriken returned to her like a boomerang which she easily caught. Rufus searched for his cell phone and dialed, but Yuffie seemed unfazed. "Tseng? I need all the Turks to come over here right now, what Reno? Put Tseng on the phone! What do mean unavailable? Fine, then get Elena! She's gone too? On a date with Tseng? Then tell Rude to get over his dislike for the phone and answer it! You're hanging up because I don't want to talk to you?! It's not that, it's just that I need to talk to someone competent right now... wait Reno, no!"
"Nobody's coming to save you!" Yuffie mocked.
Rufus called again, though this time it took a little longer for someone to answer. "Reno? Who? Cloud? Tseng said he didn't need this phone anymore? But it's his company phone! The Turks hired you to be the negotiator? Fine I'm listening..."
The Turks had a long list of demands, such as better missions, more money, frequent paid vacations, a bigger Christmas bonus, better health insurance, private company cars, and every other thing they could think of.
"Fine, but they still have to do the community missions! Oh, alright, I'll pay double for those. Fine, fine triple, just tell them to come back before there's no one left in the world of the living to sign their paychecks!" Rufus pleaded, "what? Two more demands? I have to pay the bills for the negotiator and mercenary?!" So they Turks did send Yuffie... But alas when faced with certain doom, Rufus had no choice but to comply.
There were too many people out there who wanted Mr. Rich and Pretty out of the picture, and the Turks were the only ones that could, and would be willing to, protect him, even if it came at a high price.
End of Mission 30
Disclaimer, I don't own Final Fantasy VII. Mission 30 was inspired by a review from Niquie.