Missions
Mission 31: Jump
Being a Turk, Rude got plenty of exercise; it was required for his job. After all, a Turk had to be ready at all times, because no one knew when spoiled princess Ruru would wake up in the middle of the night with a craving for Farbucks coffee, with all sorts of cream and a silly assortment of sprinkles. Obviously it couldn't be home made coffee, goodness no, it had to be bought from princess Ruru's favorite establishment, which was so conveniently open twenty-four seven, thus nullifying any possible excuses.
When the pretty boy princess had more than one Turk over to guard his door at night, and rush in to rescue him should the under the bed monster decide to come out, they would play a game of rock paper scissors to decide who would go out to get pretty boy's midnight snack.
Try as they may to avoid the midnight, or early morning, runs, Rufus would only accept freshly bought goods, nothing re-heated or re-frozen. Because re-heated coffee didn't taste the same according to him, and soft-serve ice-cream tasted best when eaten right away, becoming more like shaved ice made with flavored water if left in the freezer for too long.
Then the unfortunate Turk who lost the game would have to make a run to and from the establishment, be it Farbucks or Basket Robin, all the to Healin Lodge, which was most of the time done in a helicopter and sometimes a car, and be back before the delivery cooled off or melted; running up the stairs to tend to Rufus' needs.
Because of all that exercise, even if Rude wasn't as much as a cat as Reno, he was very agile and had a vast supply of stamina. One could also point out, especially of that one happened to be a fangirl, that Rude also had great abs, but that would be getting into another topic.
The point was that today, even if Reno had once again unwittingly lost the game of rock paper scissors, the redhead took to showing his cat-like attributes in a different way by giving his partner the saddest kitten look he could muster, thus making Rude feel like a heartless bastard if he exercised his right his to stay in Healin Lodge while Reno went out to fetch Rufus' snack.
That was how Rude's predicament started, and now he found himself in front the Seventh Heaven, which was already closed. Rufus had once tasted Tifa's cooking in a propaganda filled visit to the Seventh Heaven, during which the Turks were ordered to discreetly taste the food for poison first, which fortunately went well. The problem was that Rufus, also known as Mr. Spoiled Brat Pretty Boy, had developed a liking for Tifa's cooking, and now he wanted some fried chocobo from Tifa.
One would reason that Rude could simply go to one of those twenty-four hour fast food establishments and buy some fried chocobo, but Rufus, who was without a doubt the pickiest eater in the world, would immediately notice, and Rude's paycheck would suffer.
Thus Rude found himself jumping, he jumped until he reached a pipe sticking out of the wall of the Seventh Heaven and careful not to slip, climbed up to the second floor ledge. Of course, Rude had considered calling Tifa, but she would either murder him for waking her up in the middle of the night asking for fried chocobo, or decide to go back to sleep while she sent Cloud to murder him, hence why Rude was sneaking around trying to cause Tifa to wake up indirectly to avoid the blame.
If his plan worked, then Rude would call and say he saw the lights on and wondered if everything was alright. He would say it was his latest mission to patrol the city at night, and maybe the kind hearted Tifa would take pity on him and offer him a snack. He would find some way to bring fried chocobo into the conversation, ask her to make it 'to go' and leave, so as to not keep Tifa awake for longer than needed. At least that was the plan, and Rude was thankful that Reno wasn't preset to make a comment about how it was all about sneaking into Tifa's house more so than getting the fried chocobo.
Confirming the location Tifa's room, Rude climbed up to the roof and jumped up and down on the surface. The noise succeeded in both waking Tifa, and getting Rude's foot trapped in the hole he just made in the roof. A scream soon came, confirming just how awake Tifa was. Rude pulled his foot free, losing his shoe in the process, and ran for dear life.
Rude jumped from roof to roof until he got away, then dashed to his car, which he parked a safe distance away. Thankfully, Rude carried an extra suit and shoes, since Turks jobs sometimes got messy, or they used to in the past. He put on a new pair of shoes and casually drove by.
Rude didn't even have to call, for Tifa opened the door with a fierce look and look and her fighting gloves on, but she calmed down as soon as she recognized the driver. "Rude thank goodness it's you, I though there was some stranger driving around and I was ready to give him a beating if he turned out to be the guy who tried to break in."
"Someone tried to break in?" Rude tried to ignore the guilty feeling that pained him. Turks were not supposed to feel guilt.
"Yes, a little while ago someone was walking on the roof. I'm pretty sure it was a man judging by the shoe he lost when his foot went through a thin spot on the roof right over my bedroom. I screamed and the kids woke up, but I sent them to back bed saying I just had a nightmare; I didn't want to scare them. The guy must have run away when he realized I woke up. Cloud sleeps like a log, so I just let him rest. I'm not going back to sleep until I install a good security system," Tifa explained.
It broke Rude's heart to see Tifa that way because of something he caused, all for the sake of Rufus. "I can stay if it'll make you feel safer."
"Oh no, I couldn't ask that. I'm sure you must be tired after a long day's work. I know how the Turks' missions have been lately," Tifa replied.
"It's alright, I'm not sleepy anyway, I can keep you company and tomorrow I'll have someone from Shinra come over and install a security system for you, free of charge," Rude offered.
"Really? You would do that? Thank you so much! If you're sure you want to stay over, how about a midnight snack?" Tifa discreetly glanced at Rude's feet as they went inside, he had both his shoes, how silly of her to suspect. The similar shoe sizes were a mere coincidence. Who knows how many men in the area wear the same shoe size; and Rude was so kind...
Meanwhile, in the second floor of the Seventh Heaven, Cloud Strife tossed and turned in his sleep, as if he were having a nightmare. But back at Healin Lodge, Reno was having the real nightmare putting up with an impatient Rufus who wouldn't get his fried chocobo until the next morning.
End of Mission 31
Disclaimer, I don't own Final Fantasy VII, Starbucks or Baskin Robins.
Mission 031 was Requested by Hikou, whom I know likes Rude and his abs. I also give credit to Hikou for calling Rufus 'Princess Ruru'. It's not that we dislike Rufus, it's just that... well you know, you hurt the ones you love. Obviously I love Reno the most.
I used Farbucks like in Shrek, it wasn't a typo. I'm I the only one who hates re-frozen ice-cream? I don't drink coffee or anything hot as I prefer everything cold, but re-frozen ice-cream isn't creamy anymore. Basket Robin is also a reference, pretty easy to catch. About Reno being a cat, just look at him climbing up that wall in Advent Children. About the fried chocobo, I imagine it tastes like chicken, or turkey.