This clown...this damn clown! She...she creeps me out! I want her dead! This is the FIRST one of the four battles Saber and I have fought in, that I want to take Saber's sword and cut that creepy ass clown in half, or as I heard Saber say:
"I shall cleft you in twain, you pathetic courtroom fool!" Saber yelled at the clown.
My thoughts...exactly...
"WhY Do yOU goTtA be lIKe thAT?" Lil' Ronnie said. I swear to the gods that Saber worshiped that I could see her 1337 5p3ak...oh god now I'm doing it!
"What kind of mortal do you think you are, foolish red knight?" Lancer yelled, holding his lance, aimed at Saber. "How dare you speak to my wife in such a tone!" He yelled, angry at Saber's harsh, yet true, tones.
"That 'wife' of yours is nothing more than a broken shell of a being! Like I said, she's nothing more than a courtroom fool!"
Lancer glared at Saber. The 'pre-battle banter' didn't last that long. "Rebellious Intent!" he yelled, a powerful burst of energy pulsing from his body.
Saber retaliated with he normal pre-battle attacks. 'Fount of the Saint!" She said. One pulse. 'Fount of the Healer!" Two pulses. "Fount of Chronos!" Three pulses. She held her sword aloft to the sky, it shattering into a shower of pure, snow white feathers. She chanted her normal chant while she twirled. 'Thrice Setting Sun!"
Lancer laughed and watched, letting his rival gain power. His lance could easily outreach Saber's blade, and from Lancer's insane mindset, this could be deadly, even more deadly that Archer and his poisons.
Before I could aid in Saber's strengthening, I heard the familiar chime of a Code Cast. I watched as Lil' Ronnie bent and contorted her body in shapes and forms before she lashed her arms out.
Saber grunt a bit as a glob of sickly green and black ink exploded around her. She coughed.
The first thing to go through my mind: it's Archer all over again! I wasn't in any mood now. Having to nearly die to save Rin AND Rani, and have Rin still treat me like crap, having to deal with this terrifying clown, the fact that I could be fake...I didn't care anymore. I reached for a Remedy to heal Saber without a moment's hesitation. I activated my Code Cast: Strength.
Saber smirked as she heard her blade sharpen, seeing the glint out of the corner of her eye. "I see that you have finally...as you would say...gotten in the swing of things." She smirked, twirling her blade. I voiced my agreement.
"AwWW...i WanTEd tO EaT yOU! YoU lOOk YUMMY!" Lil' Ronnie cackled. A chill ran up my spine, but I quickly threw the feeling off.
The battle started, well, buffing wasn't starting a fight in my book just yet. Lancer rushed at Saber, gripping his lance, lashing out with a mighty arcing slash. Saber threw her guard up, her smirk growing as a pulse of energy unleashed itself from the blade, shocking the blood-stained warrior. I heard him let out a yelp of pain from it, which turned to grunts as groans as Saber had her way with him in a flurry of quick slashes.
"Aww..LaNCeR Is noT wInnIng...i kNow!" Lil' Ronnie said, twisting her body around. I heard another chime: Code Cast: Seal Break.
Saber didn't. She let battle dull her senses, so it seemed. She twirled around in place as Lancer reeled back from the onslaught. She stopped in her tracks before the attack hit.
"W-what is this black magic?" She yelled, struggling to swing her blade.
Lancer caught his breath from the quick break, using this as an opening. "I'll teach you to fear my lance.." Lancer growled. He took his blood covered lance, thrusting it through the small gap between himself and Saber, throwing her off balance. I watched, not using my Code Cast yet. I found myself using too much of my prana trying to keep her at high vitality, when I knew she was a Saber: She was built to take and deal blows, second to Berserker. My arms were crossed, my eyes fixed on Saber taking a mighty beating from spear slashes, thrusts, and bashes. Boy...was I gonna get it later when this was over. Then, all of a sudden, things got worse.
"Those gods you worship will fall and when you need them most, they will betray you! Like my God who has betrayed me!" Lancer yelled. I...forgot we were fighting Count Vlad III. But that wasn't the part that scared me. I seen him slash at Saber's legs, sending her to the ground, but he was fast.
"Cursed Lance!" Lancer yelled. He dug his bloody lance under Saber and through her body. My eyes opened in fear as I seen her cough up blood, watching her blood trickle down the lance. But the worst was yet to come. Lancer had leaped high into the air, throwing Saber off his spear. She hit the ground with a lifeless thud. My breathing grew faster, my eyes opening as wide as they could. I began to shake...I was scared, Saber was killed.
"Now! Your blood will be the perfect item for my wife to dine on!" Lancer yelled. He wasn't finished? I watched in total fear as he fell back to the digital ground, his lance digging through Saber's stomach. I felt like I was dying with her as I heard her pain filled scream. Images of Alice and her Caster started to flood my mind. Would...would I end up like her? Like Shinji? Dan? My thoughts raced as Lancer pulled his lance out of her body, kicking the limp, red-clad warrior towards me.
"yAy! LANceR Won! ThAT MeAnS I gET tO eAt yOU!" Lil' Ronnie cheered happily. She and Lancer slowly walked to me.
Red wall...c'mon..red wall..where the hell are you? Red wall...pop up dammit! I kept repeating that to myself as I slowly backed up. Did the SE. RA. PH read the battle wrong? Is this some kind of sick and twisted trick it's pulling? I quickly, albeit, panicked, activated my Heal Code Cast. I watched as Saber's wounds were healed, her breathing very slowly returning. My heart stopped it's extreme beating as I seen her get back on her feet slowly. The first thing she said:
"Master...I shall settle this matter when we return to our throne room..." She said, gripping her blade's hilt tightly. I knew I was gonna get it...worth it now that I think about it.
Lancer turned his gaze to Saber, his lance at the ready. "I suggest that you stay down or admit defeat, mortal." He said, laughing as Saber recasted her spells to power herself. "Making yourself stronger won't have any affect on the outcome of this battle, you do understand that, correct?"
Saber ignored his comment. There was a fire in her eyes. No, an inferno. I was proud, my sense of confidence slowly returning as Saber twirled his blade.
"Veil of Petals." She simply said, using her speed to attack.
Lancer laughed. "Rebellious Intent!" He cackled as he threw up his guard. His speed...it was quicker...crap. I bit my lip, Saber being pushed by by a small blast of...blood? It was red, I'm guessing it was like Saber's Chronos Fount, cause she was on a knee, stunned.
"Ceremonial Purge..." Lancer spoke up. The ground around him seemed to die, being defiled. He held his lance high, slowly pointing the tip of the blade at his heart. Was he going to kill himself? No...it wouldn't end that quickly. I watched as he drove his lance through his heart.
Saber got up, but, it seemed too late. A blackish, purplish fire erupted from inside her. I heard a yell, then she fell on both her knees. I quickly Healed her. How were all of these people stronger than us? Oh yea...that's right. Since I wasn't supposed to be in this War, Saber was reduced to near nothing in terms of powe-sorry, glory. Saber was glaring at me as she got up. Man...I was in for it.
She then glared at Lancer. I could swear, she was gripping her sword so tightly that I thought the hilt would break. She rushed for another attack, knowing her skills could be blocked. I quickly casted the Strength Code Cast once more as Saber resumed her attack. Oddly, it was going well. She was avoiding the Break-style attacks, knowing Lil' Ronnie could seal them, so she stuck with quick slashes and her counters.
"LanCER! You cAN't gO doWN lIKe tHiS!" The clown yelled in protest. She quickly used her Poison Code Cast, but with a quick use of a Remedy, it was taken care of as Saber laughed and hacked away at Lancer.
Vlad yelled in rage, using his lance to push himself back and out of harms way. "Now! You puny mortal! I will using your body for the first warning on the wall of spears I have!" he yelled, hunching over and rushing at Saber, throwing his lance upward.
"I'd like to see you try and use my body as a trophy." Saber laughed as she twirled out of the lance's reach. For a powerful warrior, she still kept her feminine charm. Saber smirked and grabbed Lancer's arm. "Now...hush lion." Saber said, pulling him closer, his lancer holding arm still outstretched. With a quick kick, Saber pushed Lancer on the ground, but her grip on his arm tightened.
The hell was she doing, was the only thing that went through my mind.
I seen Saber take her blade and drive it through Lancer's chest, but he laughed at the pain. Saber let out a slightly annoyed sigh. "I said, hush lion." Saber growled as she gripped his arm and, in a tremendous show a strength, twisted his arm.
I take back what I said about Saber being feminine. I just watched her snap his arm! I could have sworn she broke every bone in his arm, but it was a popping sound..not a snapping sound. Now I remember, Saber had told me once that she used to do some kind of sport that involved grappling.
Saber smirked as she let go of the limp arm and gripping her blade. "Good lion." She chuckled darkly, ripping the blade from his side, walking back to me. Her heels clicked. That...was a good sign. But not now.
Lancer had gotten up, much to Saber's horror, as well as mine. The blood stained warrior groaned as he popped his bones back in place. I felt my stomach flip. That was sickening.
Lancer didn't even respond. He looked at me and my Servant, then yelled. It was a horrifying yell. "FORTRTESS OF IMPALEMENT!" he yelled. The arena went black. I could hear him chant. Saber went to attack quickly before Lancer could activate his Noble Phantasm, but it was too late. A field of lances suddenly burrowed out from underground, pinning Saber and I in place. We couldn't move, one movement could spell our death. I seen his lance fly into the air, out of sight. My mind was busy thinking what could happen, well, it happened. A massive lance suddenly shot out from under Saber, holding her down. I heard a faint sound, then the sound grew extremely loud as a massive version of Lancer's spear tore into Saber.
My eyes opened once again. Did...did she die? I watched as the field of lances died down and Lancer's blood stained lance returned to his hand. My eyes them slowly drifted to Saber. Her body was limp, lifeless. My eyes flew open as I tried to Heal her. It hit me: I used too much prana again and I couldn't use my Code Casts. The overwhelming fear returned as I heard my breathing grow jagged and short.
Lancer and Lil' Ronnie looked over at me, the clown's sick and twisted grin sending chills down my spine.
"LiL' RonNIe can FinaLLy eaT You!" She giggled insanely. " I wONdeR hOw yoU TasTe?"
Red wall! Red wall! C'mon! Not again...how could this happen to Saber? How? I panicked. Lancer readied his lance as he walked over, chuckling. Lancer's chuckle turned into a laughter, then a pure, insanity and rage filled laugh. I backed up as much as I could before I stumbled over my feet. Where was that wall? Lancer placed the tip of his lance against my chest, over my heart.
"You fought well...too bad that you must die..." Lancer said. I was shaking terribly, my heart was racing. This was it, I was going to die. I see Lancer slowly rear back, ready to end my life. I closed my eyes and waited for the attack. I heard a slash, a groan, then a thud. I slowly opened by eyes, scared to see if I had been struck down without knowing. But...
Saber sighed, her blade in Lancer's back, the warrior lying on the ground. "Master...next tine...don't waste your precious prana. I do thank you for strengthening me, and curing my wounds, but please, show restraint." She said, holding her hand out to me. I smiled a bit, taking her hand as she pulled me up. I could have sworn I caught her smile as well. Thrice Setting Sun. I finally figured out what it does: It revives her.
Just at that, the wall had appeared, Saber's blade returning to her side. We both turned, seeing Lancer rise from the ground, only to fall back on a knee, defeated. His gaze turned to Lil' Ronnie.
"AwW...lanCEr...yOu lOSt...noW I cAn Eat yoU!" She giggled.
Lancer groaned, turning to her. "No my love...I wouldn't suffice as a meal fit for you...I.." he bit his words, in pain. "I...I am not worthy of such beauty."
…the SE. RA. PH has some sick sense of humor. Pairing Vlad the Impaler, the being that made what the vampire is today, well, the vampire it is today...aside from those sparkly vampires that glow in the sun. Oh, sorry, getting off topic...anyway...Vlad the Impaler and this freak of nature clown, who ate her own family..even her child...
Lil' Ronnie looked sad, but then again, her make-up always make her look happy. She knelt down besides Lancer as he vanished, wiping her sleeves in the blood he left behind. Her beady eyes slowly looked towards me and Saber.
"I beAT yoU TwO wOULd mAkE THe bEST meAL eVeR." She giggled as she slowly vanished, being eaten alive by the blackness that ate away all those who lost.
Saber and I looked at each other, suddenly arriving in our private room. Before I could say anything, she started her tirade on how to 'keep her strong' and 'don't let others berate her' and to 'keep support at all costs'...okay...so maybe Saber was bad in terms of her ego, but then again, it was who she was, and due to that, it let us win.