Notes - Just a warning, but this chapter might push the T rating a little. I don't think it deserves an M based on the average stories I see with that rating, but either way, you've been warned!
Then and Now
XX
"And stay out!"
Ron had already exited the bar after sensing that a fight was about to ensue, and he watched from the middle of the dirt road as the bouncer attempted to throw Shego out the back door. Unfortunately for the man, even when she was more than a little tipsy, Shego was more than a match for the average bouncer. Ron cringed as the bouncer tried to push Shego before she grabbed him and flipped him over her head, sprawling his body out unceremoniously into the street.
"Whash 'at?" exclaimed Shego. "You thtay out! Hahaha."
The bouncer got up and dusted himself off, glaring at Shego. For a moment it looked like he was about to make a running dash at her, but a glance at softly glowing green hands convinced him that it was probably better just to go back inside. The woman was out of the bar now, and she had hopefully gotten the point. Shego watched with an unsteady grin as the bouncer entered the bar and slammed the door shut behind him.
"C'mon," she said. "Gotta dance now."
Ron was about to protest that maybe she was not in the best state to dance, but felt himself dragged along by the arm as the two of them left the side alley into the main road. Shego led him along rows of shops, restaurants, bistros, and tourist traps overlooking the coast. They were on Cyprus, but Ron had no idea where exactly they were beyond that; Shego had taken the two of them in the hovercraft and insisted this was a great place to party. She did seem to know the town well, and a number of its inhabitants kept giving her nervous looks as if they were well aware of her. Whether or not they were actually headed in the direction of a club, however, Ron could only guess.
"'S in here," slurred Shego as they arrived at a nondescript looking gray concrete building. Ron could hear the faint pulse of a dance beat reverberating through the walls. A small ramp filled with a waiting line of people along the side of the building led down below the level of the road itself. Shego pulled Ron down the ramp, elbowing people aside until she reached a bouncer, who stood behind a velvet rope next to double doors. The music pulsed more loudly and insistently, and Ron could see dancers through circular glass windows set into the doors.
"Lemme in," said Shego as she gave the bouncer an insistent poke. "Bad day, 'n I wanna have a fun wish – with, uh," - she paused briefly, looking like she was about to throw up, but gained control of herself at the last minute - "with 'is dork here!"
The bouncer looked at her silently. Ron noticed a glimmer of recognition in his eye, and his no-nonsense demeanor seemed to falter for a moment as he reluctantly unhooked the velvet rope and motioned for the two of them to pass. Before he knew what was happening, Ron found himself jostled and jabbed by a packed room of dancers. Harsh electronic music thudded the air like a hammer, and the room was drenched in neon blue lighting. Bright blue lasers passed overhead, coming from some kind of revolving device at the end of the room near a D.J, but Ron could barely see over the tops of the dancers' heads.
"How long are we gonna be out?" yelled Ron over the music.
"Can't hear you," said Shego as she pulled Ron closer and began to undulate her sinuous body to the beat. "Sh'up and show me you moves, s-sidekick!"
Ron felt himself bounce off of nearby club-goers as Shego's wild dancing knocked him backwards, but the dance floor was crowded enough to send him right back at her, as if the room's occupants were acting as one in rejecting his total lack of groove. Shego's jet black hair whipped across Ron's face as he felt himself brushed by skin-tight green and black fabric. He began to wonder if he was in over his head.
XX
Another cupcake disappeared into Monique's mouth as she finished outlining the worries that had plagued her that weekend. Her stomach gave a silent rumble of protest, and she decided she had probably eaten enough for one night. The cupcakes had done their job as comfort food.
"Want any more?" asked Hank. "They're on the house."
"I'm good, but thanks. And that's very generous of you."
"It's the least I can do while your girlfriend is helping to apprehend those thieves."
While Monique had not come into the bakery expecting to complain about her relationship worries to someone she had just met, Hank had a strangely comfortable manner about him. He was a good listener, and even if his friendliness was of the customer service variety, it worked well enough for Monique.
"So what about you?" asked Monique. "You weren't worried about Drakken goin' back to Shego?"
"No, I suppose not," said Hank. "Drakken told me the whole thing with the flower tendrils at the United Nations conference was just a mistake, and they had a bit of a mind of their own sometimes. Apparently Shego interpreted it as interest. Drakken was too timid to make that clear to her, they went on a series of awkward dates and villainous capers filled with increasingly one-sided romantic tension, until finally Drakken was forced to let Shego know that he didn't share her feelings and he had been accidentally leading her along the whole time."
"Yikes. What happened then?"
"He said the injuries were relatively minor, considering. But the point is, I don't really think Drakken ever had any strong feelings for Shego. I do feel bad for the girl, so I can understand your guilt with Ron, even though I can tell you it's misplaced. It wasn't as if you stole the boy from Kim, after all."
Monique looked out the window beside their booth and watched as the occasional pair of car headlights flashed down the side street. Sometimes a cold-looking person walked briskly past the window and gave Monique a glance as she stared out that them. She always thought there was something a little awkward about meeting someone's gaze when you were looking out of a window as they passed by.
The pedestrians were passing by less frequently as the night drew to a close, taking the weekend with it. Monique wondered where Kim was, and if she would end up missing any classes tomorrow. She had no idea how Kim ever went on missions in high school without piling up enough absences to be suspended. But then, anything was possible for that girl.
"So how did you find out you had a thing for Drakken?" she asked.
"It was your typical work relationship blossoming into something more. Drakken approached me after saving the world-"
"Helping to save the world," Monique corrected.
"Yes, that's correct. Helping to save the world. He said he was going through a moral quandary and wanted to try running a legitimate business venture, and wanted my expertise. The two of us went to cupcakes immediately due to our past experience, of course, and decided to try a cafe and bakery. We spent most of our time together after that. Planning, talking. Sharing."
Hank began to reminisce, a glimmer showing in his eyes, when Monique snapped her fingers.
"Earth to Hank!"
"Oh yes. We ended up finding that we had a lot in common, but Drakken can be fairly absorbed in his work. So much so that he doesn't notice other people's feelings. He was with Shego for years without realizing she had a thing for him, after all. So I started inviting him to have a cup of coffee with me after our work. Maybe see a movie, little things like that. And soon I made my move."
"Sneaky. Did he freak?"
"Yes, he did," said Hank with a frown. "But when it comes to business and romance, Hank Perkins is not a man to just give up! I made a few pie charts, explained the benefits of a relationship with me, and told him that clearly it was worth experimenting a little when he had spent years employing an attractive woman as his number two while making no attempt to even test the waters with her."
"Well, maybe he respected the limits of a work relationship."
"He's a supervillain," Hank pointed out. "Violating workplace rules and regulations? Not so much of an issue."
"Hmm. True."
Monique paused in mid-sip of her coffee. "Wait, he is a supervillain?"
"Was, of course. Now he is an entrepreneur, and my very hunky older boyfriend. Have you seen the man with his shirt off, by any chance? I don't know if it's some kind of secret implants I don't know about, or if the man just works out when I don't see it, but you could cut glass with those pectoral muscles."
Monique shuddered at the thought. Given her girlfriend's much more extensive experience with Drakken, she had to assume that Kim would have shuddered herself right into temporary unconsciousness.
Once again, Monique found herself thinking of her girlfriend. The cupcakes were no help. Talking to Hank was no help. Monique supposed that she had gotten used to having Kim around all the time, not worrying about missions, about whether Kim was alright. This weekend had just been too jarring. She was about to ask Hank if they could get in contact with Drakken and see if there were any updates on Kim and Ron's situation when she heard the door of the cafe opening. Most of the customers had left, and no one had entered the cafe in a while, so Monique looked back over the top of her booth at the door.
She smiled at the sight that greeted her. Kim looked a little chilly in that midriff-baring mission outfit, but the smile she returned was warm enough to bake a cupcake.
"Kim! You're back!"
Monique leaped out of the booth and ran across the shop to pull her girlfriend into an enthusiastic hug. Kim patted Monique on the back, and gave an overly theatrical groan after a moment to indicate that she needed some air. Monique smiled even more widely as Kim gave her a kiss upon her release.
"How'd you know I was here, girl?"
"Wade traced your cell phone," said Kim. "I got dropped off the the warehouse and Drakken wasn't there, so I figured I'd just go to our apartment but then you weren't there, and once I found out you were here I thought I'd surprise you. And I need to let Hank and Drakken know what's going on, I guess. Why are you here, anyway?"
"Because the cupcakes are totally T.D.F, duh," said Monique as she looked over at the booth where Hank was sitting and gave him a wink. "That and I just kinda stumbled on it when I was walking around downtown."
"A night out on the town, huh? Enjoying your time without me?"
Kim laughed, but Monique's expression was serious enough that she stopped abruptly.
"What's wrong?" she asked.
"Oh, it's nothing. It's just been one of those weekends."
"Ah. Tell me about it."
Monique wasn't quite ready to let Kim know that she had just been griping about her romantic worries to the boyfriend of one of Kim's former supervillain archnemeses – the whole situation seemed awkward, to say the least – so she decided to shift the focus to her girlfriend instead.
"Well, what's up Kim? Tell me all about the mission! What's the sitch with you and Ron?"
Kim held out a hand to slow her down.
"Okay, but let's go back to the apartment first, shall we?"
"Sounds good to me."
The two of them were about to leave when the cafe door burst open, its bell chiming wildly. Drakken stood in the doorway and stared at the two girls in front of him before noticing Hank over their shoulder. His flustered expression changed momentarily into good humor as he gave his boyfriend a wave.
"Hello, Hank!"
"Hi Drakken! Back from work, I hope?"
"Indeed. Assad and I made a lot of progress, and the loading dock door looks as good as new. Once we have the warehouse open again, things should be rolling smoothly. Speaking of which..."
Drakken looked back at Kim Possible as if remembering she was still there. She looked like she was waiting to leave the shop, were it not for his standing in her way. "Kim Possible," he said. "You're back from your mission?"
"That's right. I guess I missed you at the warehouse."
"Well, what did you find?"
"Shego stole your cupcakes."
Drakken felt confused for a moment, then surprised as he hadn't seen Shego in years, then angry that she would brazenly steal his merchandise. Then, finally, he felt a bolt of fear run down his spine.
"Why?" he stammered. "Did – did I do something to make her angry?"
Kim rolled her eyes at her old foe. "Work it out between yourselves, okay?"
Drakken pondered the statement, feeling a little indignant at Kim's snippy tone. Not even a teen anymore, as far as he knew, but still with the sass all the time. He couldn't think of what he had possibly done to Shego to merit thievery. Other than that whole awkward misunderstanding a few years ago, but there was no way Shego could still be hung up about that. Not unless she held grudges for a long, long time.
Did she? He felt a bead of sweat run down his forehead.
"What did you guys say you were going to pay me? A hundred dollars?"
Drakken peered suspiciously at Kim.
"You didn't bring my Cupcake Containment Chamber back?"
"Ugh," said Kim as she realized her mistake. Not that a hundred dollars made that much of a difference in the first place. "Okay, no, I guess I didn't. So whatever. See you later."
The bell on the shop's front door chimed a cheerful goodbye as Kim took Monique by the hand and brushed by Drakken to leave the store. He stood in the middle of his cafe, flummoxed, until Hank motioned for him to come sit in the booth with him. The store was now empty besides Hank and himself, so Drakken locked the door and flipped the 'open' sign to 'closed' before slipping behind the cafe counter and getting himself a cup of coffee. He grabbed a cupcake from below the display counter for good measure – one of the few that had not been bought and eaten by his customers that day.
"Shego?" asked Hank. "We haven't heard from her in a long time."
"No, we have not."
"Do you think we're in any trouble?"
Drakken did not answer, but Hank did notice his throat twitch in a telltale gulp. He knew Drakken's old sidekick had a vicious temper, from the many lurid – and probably somewhat exaggerated – tales that his boyfriend had told him. Hank sat back in the booth with Drakken and finished his coffee in silence as he thought about the news.
"Don't you worry – I'll protect you from her, Drewbie."
"Oh Perky Werky," laughed Drakken, "you silly, naïve man."
His laughter cut off awkwardly as the pet name Hank had called him began to sink in, reminding him of his mother. "Also, please don't call me Drewbie. It brings up unpleasant maternal associations."
"Noted!"
Hank sat quietly with Drakken and enjoyed the cozy cafe. Drakken's former employee and sidekick, stealing their cupcakes through intermediaries so she wouldn't have to show her face to him. Maybe she was running tests on their product. Maybe testing their defenses for a greater strike. Or maybe she was just being vindictive after hearing her old flame had started a successful new enterprise without her. A little childish, he thought. But love could make people do some crazy things.
XX
A terrifying night was beginning to wind down, and Ron sat at an outdoor bar with Shego that overlooked the beach. The bar was small, square, surrounded by stools, and covered by a thatched roof that was lined with Christmas lights for some inexplicable reason. A bartender stood inside of the square of counters and poured another shot for Shego, who downed it in a single gulp. The bartender clearly knew not only who she was, but that she had a superhumanly high alcohol tolerance and a very short temper if that tolerance was not met immediately.
"So we went out, but it was all weird," said Shego, a little more sober than she had been earlier that night. "He was always like, 'Shego, why are you leaning in to kiss me, we're in a public restaurant', stuff like that. And pretty soon he broke the truth."
"What happened then?" asked Ron.
"Oh, I beat that moron black and blue. Which, come on, have you seen the guy? That's not easy!"
Shego laughed uproariously as Ron sat at the bar with a nervous grin. He looked at the bartender as if silently asking whether Shego brought any other young men to this bar before dragging them out onto the beach and eating them alive. The bartender seemed to pick up the meaning behind Ron's look and gave him a sympathetic eyebrow shrug in reply as he silently cleaned a cocktail shaker with a towel.
"Well, sorry about that," said Ron. "That's gotta be a bummer."
He patted Shego on the shoulder, who almost jerked back, but decided to let it pass.
"He probably felt threatened by you. I mean, you're a strong, independent woman who does her own thing!"
Shego forced back a laugh. The comment was corny, but endearing. And definitely true, she reminded herself.
"Yeah, I mean – no, wait. No, it's not a bummer. You know what, Stoppable? You gotta live in the present and stop lingering on the past, and so do I. Drakken was always self-absorbed. The only person he could ever be in love with is himself. It's the same as Kim Possible, always thinking she's number one. Why do you think she made you a sidekick?"
"Well, I kind of wanted to be."
Ron had thought about some of the things he said to Kim earlier that day, and he knew that he wasn't being as fair as he could have been. Kim might be jealous of his monkey powers, but to be honest, Ron was a little scared of them as well. He had wanted to go to Yamanouchi in order to gain control over those powers, but it was a double edged sword – he remembered being scared of the idea of having a destiny, of having a power that was bigger than he was. Something that would change him from Ron Stoppable into a new person. Possibly a person he did not recognize.
"I guess I still kind of want to be a sidekick," he admitted. "Maybe a more useful sidekick, but I don't know if I'd be any good as the top dog. What about you?"
"What about me?" said Shego.
"What do you want to be? I mean, you were kind of Drakken's sidekick."
Ron blanched at a sudden low grumble coming from Shego. "A totally unfair position," he said, "since you were so much more talented than Drakken ever was."
"Lame sucking up," said Shego, "but I'll let it pass."
Shego grew silent as she tapped her empty shot glass against the bar. She had been trying to make a point, but now Ron was making her consider her own situation. She fished some cash out of her pocket, grabbed Ron by the arm, and pulled him away from the bar as the two of them walked towards the beach.
Ron looked back and gave the bartender another glance, just the tiniest bit worried for his safety. The bartender raised an eyebrow and watched the two of them leave, glad that – this time - Shego had come to his bar after her usual streak of partying damage had already been done.
"I guess I haven't really figured things out after I stopped working for Drakken," said Shego. "You know I have a degree in child development, right?"
"I remember you mentioning that. Why'd you get a degree like that?"
Shego knew there were some complicated reasons for why she had chosen the degree, some of which stemmed from her own unusual childhood, when she and her brothers had been forced into bizarre situation against their will that separated them from other children. But there was another good answer to why she had chosen that field of study. One that was easier to put into words.
"I like kids."
"For real?"
"Yeah, what's up with the tone? Like I can't have layers or something?"
Ron shrugged. He had a hard time envisioning Shego bouncing a squealing baby on her knee, or tolerating a teenager for more than five seconds without ending up in jail on assault changes and breaking out five minutes later. But then, she had been showing him a side that he hadn't seen before.
"I'm pretty good with kids," said Ron. "I've been helping my folks raise my sister, Hana. I think I'm gonna be a pretty good dad whenever I get the chance."
"And when's that? No offense, but you don't strike me as remotely ready to have kids, Stoppable."
Ron looked a little chagrined by her comment, and Shego felt something in response – exasperation, probably. But definitely not guilt. She was completely right, after all.
"Relax," she said. "Not like I'm ready either. I don't know if you were paying attention in health class, but you need someone else to have kids, you know. You still wanna be Kim's boyfriend?"
Ron took a moment to think about it. Kim had been right; he was not over her, and he had never really dealt with the breakup. Maybe he had even dealt with it in a childish way, convincing himself that he was wronged and that it had all been Kim's fault. Avoiding any thought about the circumstances that had led up to it. And yet, he knew the answer to Shego's question.
"No," he finally said. "I think I'll always love Kim, but I'm not in love with her anymore. I guess that part of our lives is past. And she's with Monique now, anyway – I couldn't break the two of them up. I just want to be friends with her again, you know? Best friends since Pre-K, and then all of a sudden there's nothing left. That leaves a hole that never gets filled in with anything else."
Shego nodded. For a buffoon, he could be surprisingly poetic sometimes.
"What about you? Are you still crushing on Drakken?"
"Doctor D? No, like I said, he's too self-absorbed, and he was never into me anyway. And Kim was right about most of what she said. The whole island lair, the buff henchmen, Midas, it was all like a rebound thing."
Shego knew it was a little more than that, but it would hurt her pride to say it out loud. When things had ended with Drakken she had actually tried to be a supervillain. Years of working with Drakken, surreptitiously selling a few of his devices on the black market, stealing things on the side, had amassed her a considerable fortune. She had bought the island, built the lair, hired the gleaming bronzed bodyguards to not only serve her but give her some eye candy – and extra special massages on the side.
But time had told Shego that she was no supervillain. The monitoring, the micromanaging, the day to day inconveniences of keeping a high-tech operation running day and night: all of it had exhausted her. She didn't like ordering henchmen around either - or, to be honest, she did, but having to actually make up the orders and manage them was boring.
It wasn't that Shego couldn't be a supervillain, but it just didn't interest her. She liked wisecracking, observing, watching one of Drakken's pie-in-the-sky plans fall apart. She liked having an easy exit strategy if people like Kim Possible foiled things as well. Nothing to defend, nothing to tie her down if she needed to cut and run. The only reason she had stayed with Drakken so long was his particular brand of dorky charm and amusing schemes.
And so her island empire had fallen apart, and eventually she devolved from a supervillain into a resentful recluse surrounded by henchmen with very little to do. Until the cupcake stealing.
"Having Midas around must be awkward if he's an ex-boyfriend," said Ron.
"Yeah, I've been thinking about getting rid of him. I guess I'm just too lazy, and he does do a good job of taking care of the island for me. He just wasn't that interesting. And he didn't even pick up on the fighting and villainy skills the way Junior did – no real talent for it. It took forever just to get him to land hits instead of throwing himself off balance every time he threw a punch."
"Is that why you hired all those henchmen who look sort of like Junior?" Ron asked, hoping that he wasn't stumbling onto yet another awkward fixation Shego had for someone else.
"No, no," laughed Shego. "Well, I mean, sort of. I've always had kind of a thing for brawny tanned guys, especially if they give massages. I thought it would be a good idea to hire them as my henchmen. But you know what?"
Ron looked up at her as the two of them walked along the dark beach, waiting for an answer. The surf crashed against the shore as Shego formed her realization. Talking to Ron was surprisingly effective at getting her to engage in a little introspection. Maybe it was that he paid attention, listened, and sometimes even asked questions, instead of staring at her with a slack jaw.
"The buff guys are really freaking boring. And they can't do that much. Midas is less idiotic than most, but he's still pretty bland. I guess after Midas and those henchmen, I started to realize that maybe I'm into guys who are a little more dorky. A little more interesting, with a bit of that childlike wonder going on. Like Drakken, basically."
"It wasn't just an older dude kind of thing?"
"No," said Shego. "Honestly, the age difference threw me off at first, until I got used to it."
"So you stole the cupcakes from him to get attention, like Kim said?"
Shego shrugged. "Maybe. I don't know if that's true or not. I did feel compelled to steal them. Maybe I really am that petty and I just couldn't consciously admit it to myself, I dunno."
The conversation lost itself into the sound of the waves as Shego and Ron passed along the beach. The lights of the town bordered them on their right, and the occasional laugh and chatter of conversation reached them from its streets, but the beach was dark and mostly empty, giving them a little privacy. Before long, they came upon a small inlet bordered by a large villa. A covered dock jutted out into the inlet, and a yacht was moored by its side, bobbing gently in the surf.
"This looks like private property, said Ron. "You sure we should be here?"
"Live a little, Stoppable."
The gate to the dock was locked and chained shut, but Shego severed the chain with a swipe of her fiery hand. For a split second, the gloomy night air around the dock was lit by a flash of green light.
The moonlight was bright enough to guide their way as Shego led Ron down the dock and onto the yacht. They climbed aboard and opened a hatch that led into the living quarters. Shego found a light and turned it on. It was well-furnished, and as she opened the refrigerator in the small kitchenette, she was happy to see they had some soda. She decided she had downed enough alcohol for one night. A few cupboards revealed bags of chips, as well as a few bags of Pop Pop Porter's Food Style Pork Wafers. Shego jerked her head to the side as Ron's hand shot up, grabbing one greedily from the cupboard.
"Saw something you liked, huh?"
"Totally. They're food-style!" exclaimed Ron through a mouthful.
"Say it, don't spray it."
Shego wiped a few crumbs from her suit and continued to explore the yacht. There wasn't that much to explore, but she always enjoyed trespassing. Among the many other illegal activities she enjoyed. Not to mention that, as horrifying as it was to admit, she was actually enjoying being away from her island in the company of Kim's sidekick.
She had to admit that being on her island lair could get lonely. Things had gotten awkward after she had broken up with Midas, and none of the other henchmen made very good conversationalists unless you wanted grunts and confused head-scratching. As much as Drakken had annoyed her sometimes, he always had something to say. And as annoying as Ron could be sometimes, he certainly had things to say too.
The two of them went down a narrow hallway running from the kitchen to the interior of the yacht, Ron trying his best to balance a handful of sodas and snacks in his hand. Shego looked back with a grin; she found it hilarious that discovering one of his favorite snacks had been enough to make him forget that he was holding, and about to be eating, someone else's property. She wondered if maybe his scruples were not quite set in stone the way Kimmie's were.
They snooped around in several small compartments as they traversed the yacht's interior, finding nothing of much interested. When they reached the end of the hall, Shego opened a door to find a surprisingly expansive bedroom compartment within. Whoever owned the yacht liked to spend a lot of time on it, she supposed. The boat was nice enough that she was beginning to consider stealing it.
Shego went into the bedroom and looked out a circular window set into the hull, over the bed. The waterline was only a few feet below the window, and she could see the moonlit ocean waves lapping beyond the boat, whispering a soft murmur as they caressed its hull. The moon hung bright in the distance, and over the whispers of the ocean, she heard a lone buoy bell ringing plaintively in the distance.
Ron had already sat on the bed and cracked open a soda, the loud snap breaking the silence of the room. The ocean's spell was temporarily broken, and Shego looked down at him as a predatory grin crossed over her face. Kim Possible had been a real pain in the ass that day - not just to her, but to the buffoon as well. Shego wondered how Princess would react to the news that her ex boyfriend had been defiled by her arch nemesis. Not only that, but Shego hadn't gotten laid in quite a while. Two birds with one stone.
"Hey Stoppable," she said. "Put down that soda."
Ron paused in mid-gulp and stared at Shego's expression. Heard a soft cackle come from near the doorway as she slipped over to the wall and turned off the bedroom light. Felt a soft bump from the bed as Shego took a seat beside him. Felt another soft bump as an arm brushed against his own.
Ron had not put down the soda, and it went flying out of his hand as Shego pushed him onto his back, hard. The soda rolled across the floor, spilling its contents on the carpet until there was nothing left. The dark form of Kim's arch nemesis blocked Ron's vision as she lifted one leg over Ron's body and straddled him on the bed. Her black hair was lit by the moonlight coming from the round boat window behind them. Her eyes twinkled maliciously.
"Did Princess ever do this to you, Stoppable?"
Ron gulped in a combination of fear and excitement. Probably more of the former.
"Uh, Shego, you're drunk."
"Not really."
"This is someone else's bed. We're on their sheets. It's kinda gross, don't you think?"
Ron felt the bedsheets ripped out from under him as Shego pulled them out, like an entertainer ripping a tablecloth from a table without disturbing the settings.
"We don't need sheets."
Ron's mind began to race. He was trapped; pinned with no escape. Was this good or bad? Thoughts – Shego – about to be eaten alive – trouble concentrating – hands behind back – being pulled up, so warm -
"Kiss me, dork."
XX
A stairway rose for three stories, open to the night air, connecting two apartment buildings together. Kim and Monique's room was on the second floor – room 203. The light in the small outdoor entryway to the second floor apartments was out, and a key fumbled in the darkness as Monique tried to open the door. Two bodies stumbled into the apartment as the key finally slipped into the lock. Kim closed the door quickly, not wanting to lose the warmth in their home to the cold night.
"I missed you so much," said Monique as she turned on the light and sat down on the couch. "I know it's stupid, but you wouldn't believe the things I started thinking, Kim – I was worried you were gonna get back together with Ron, that you were gonna break up with me, that-"
"Wait, what?"
Kim sat down on the couch with her girlfriend. Monique was wearing a faux-fur jacket, which she had taken off in the warmth of the apartment, and since Kim was still cold, she grabbed it and wrapped it around herself.
"I don't now, I just started totally jelling!" explained Monique. "I know it's stupid, Kim, but I'm not as strong as you are. I might act like it but I'm not. I was talking with Steve and Paul at the mall the other day and they told me I was being ridiculous but I guess I didn't listen and I-"
"Monique, Monique!"
Kim held a finger up to Monique's lips, silencing her for a moment, and pulled her into an embrace. Partly to comfort her, and partly because the jacket was still not warming her up quickly enough. "You know I'm not going to get back together with Ron. That's all in the past."
Monique felt a pang of guilt. Kim had told her about the mission, about how things did not look like they were going to work out with Ron. Monique knew that Kim wanted to be friends with him again, and she felt bad for worrying about the two of them getting together again when she should have been hoping for the mission to rekindle their friendship. She wanted to be friends with Ron again too, after all.
But with her girlfriend back, Monique's melancholy over the situation with Ron did not last long. She couldn't repress her gladness, and what was more, she knew the minute she had seen her girlfriend standing in that bakery door, back from her mission, that her worries had been unfounded.
"Monique, you know I want to be with you right? I still care about Ron, I'm probably never going to stop caring about him, but you're the one I want to be with. You're mine."
"I know. I'm just glad you're back."
Kim smiled, glad to be back as well. The mission had been draining, and she was finally home. Her home away from home, at least. The two of them were together again. Kim could no longer resist edging closer and holding Monique, greedily grasping, pulling her in for a kiss.
She remembered the first kiss. The first time they were together - really together. It was not the kind of thing Kim would forget, but she had never seen it coming either.
Her morning classes had ended, and Kim had left the building and chosen an open space in the center of a picnic area between campus buildings. A gazebo had stood nearby, but Kim had wanted to feel the green grass beneath her legs. She had wanted to spread out a small tablecloth and eat the lunch she had made for herself under a warm noon sun hanging high in the sky.
She spread her tablecloth, white with a red checkered pattern of course, and took her lunch from its brown paper bag. Sandwich, thermos of apple juice, bag of fresh strawberries. Being with Ron had sharpened her culinary skills, and while Ron was not with her anymore, the skills were still around. Kim liked the sandwiches she made, especially after a tough class.
"Kim," came a voice from across the green square. It was her best friend, Monique.
"Hey Monique! I thought you had a class?"
"We got out early. Teach had a bad spell of the whooping cough."
"Yikes." Kim motioned to the spread around her. "Why don't you have some lunch with me? I'll try to tear the sandwich in half."
Monique sat down on the other side of the tablecloth while Kim tried her best to take the sandwich apart without a knife. The attempt failed, and the poor sandwich was torn apart in a mess. Kim blushed a little as her friend laughed at the sight. Kim offered her the sandwich, but Monique shook her head, and Kim decided that she had ruined it enough to make it look completely unappetizing. She shrugged and opened her bag of strawberries, eating one and throwing another for Monique to catch.
"Hey Kim?"
Kim saw a change in Monique's expression as the two of them ate their strawberries. While Monique had been smiling and laughing a moment before, she was now serious. Concentrating. As if she was about to say something very important.
"What is it?"
"I'm about to tell you something, and, well – you might freak a little?"
"Are you asking me, or telling me?"
"Uh, kinda both."
"Why would I freak?"
"It's just that..."
Monique faltered a little, and Kim began to feel herself growing nervous. Whatever it was, Kim hoped it Monique was not preparing to tell her some bad news.
"Well, you already know I like the ladies, of course."
Kim nodded. Monique had, in fact, told her about that in the past. She had kept quiet in high school for a number of reasons, but Kim was happy that Monique could be more open with her in college.
"Well, it's not just any ladies I happen to like."
"Oh yeah?"
Kim sensed incoming gossip, and she did enjoy a little gossip from time to time. Monique nodded, her body language unusually shy compared to her regular demeanor.
"Someone in particular?" asked Kim. "Someone I know?"
And that was when, instead of an answer, Kim had gotten a kiss. A wild, passionate kiss, a kiss that Monique had taken from her by making a sudden leap across the tablecloth and knocking their lunch aside. The kiss, of course, had been an answer without words. Kim had been shocked by the kiss. Shocked that Monique had never said anything about her true feelings until then.
The aching lips and soft caress spoke of years of pent up desire, of unspoken longing, and Kim had understood Monique's feelings in an instant. Her own feelings had been unclear – shock had been the one overriding reaction – but there had been something about that kiss. Maybe it had been the urgency, the insistence. Or maybe it had been the taste of strawberry.
She tasted that strawberry now, sitting in the familiar comfort of their apartment, wrapped in Monique's arms.
"What is that?" she asked.
Monique smiled. She was able to read Kim's mind by the tone of her voice, able to know her thoughts by observing the trace of her tongue going over a lower lip.
"Strawberry cupcake," she managed to say, just before Kim went in for another taste.
XX
It made no difference how late it was to Wade – he was a creature of the night, and he had lots to do in his game of Everlot. Orcs to slay, experience points to gain. He was still in a bad mood mood after the total bust that the mission had been, as well – Wade had barely talked to Kim since she left the island, since he figured she probably wanted a little time to herself, and it was hard to get much from Ron since he was sort of undercover, tailing Shego around.
Speaking of Ron, thought Wade as he found a safe spot to hide his wizard avatar before he opened a screen that kept watch over Ron's tracking chip readouts, what are you up to down there?
The chip was still pulsing a clear signal from Cyprus. Wade couldn't figure it out – his imagination ran wild as he looked at the readings on the signal. Maybe after Kim's stormy departure, Ron had convinced Shego that he wanted to dip his toe into the turbulent waters of villainy, and the two of them were paying a visit to some villain contact Shego had. Maybe they were robbing something, and Ron was gathering evidence against her. Or, more likely, too terrified to do anything. He could be in need of Wade's help. Or maybe-
Wade looked at the readouts more closely. Ron's signal had been in one place for quite a while. He took a few moments to hack into various systems, run his greedy fingers through the information superhighway to see what traffic he could pick up, and got a few satellite pictures over the area. He zoomed in on a photo and quickly recognized where the signal was emanating from. A yacht.
Ron's tracking chip had a few other odds and ends built into it, just to make sure he was okay, and Wade now noticed that the heart rate and temperature readings were going up. Weird, he thought. Maybe Ron was in some kind of danger. Wade stared at the readings, nonplussed, until something occurred to him, and in the darkness of his room, he felt the prickly heat of a deep blush spreading over his face.
"Wade Load!"
Wade gasped and minimized the screen as quickly as he could, whirling around in his chair at the sound of his mother's voice. She was standing in the doorway, and Wade almost fell out of his chair and knocked a computer off his desk as he tried to regain his balance after the wild swivel.
"Mom! Hi! How are you doing? Nice night huh?"
"Wade, can't you go to bed? I can hear you typin' away in here – you always type so darn loud!"
"Sorry about that. Any minute now."
His mother grumbled and closed the door again, and Wade breathed a sigh of relief as he returned to the computers. He decided, for the time being, to keep Ron's chip readouts closed and away from his sight. He was sure Ron was doing alright, and Wade didn't need to be checking in all the time. Maybe he'd see what was going on tomorrow.
But for now, it was straight to bed. And hopefully he wouldn't have any bad dreams.
XX
Shego was truly enjoying herself for the first time in months. She looked down at Ron's pleased, somewhat vacant expression as he lay pinned beneath her. Ron had looked a little terrified when they first started, sort of like a trapped animal, and that had appealed to Shego in its own twisted way, but she could tell that he was realizing just how much he was lucking out. He was still just going along for the ride, but Shego didn't mind that either. She liked to be in control.
Princess never gave you anything like this, she silently spoke to him, feeling a little cocky. I guess she can't do everything, can she?
Shego grinned voraciously as she leaned down and pulled Ron into a deep kiss. The boat rocked gently in the dark waves, and the two of them followed its motion. Ron winced slightly as a pair of fingernails dug into his skin, just a little bit. She let herself go - just a little bit - and their black outlines lit with a faint green glow in the darkness as her hands pulsed with energy. They were hot to the touch, warming Ron's skin just enough to elicit another wince. But it was a good wince. Shego could tell.
Maybe it was the fact that he had an innocent vibe to him. Maybe it was the fact that he was Kim Possible's sidekick, her ex-boyfriend, a way in which she could best her foe in at least at one activity. Maybe she just enjoyed his company. He did have a certain charm when he calmed down a little, and he was a better conversationalist than those mouth breathers who worked for her. As for Ron's knack in the sack - well, Shego was pulling a lot of the slack. She began to feel like it was time to speed things up a bit.
"Don't be scared, Ron."
Ron laughed nervously in the darkness. "Me?" he asked. "Scared? No way!"
"Then touch me. Touch me more."
Shego guided his hands, felt them running over her naked skin, coursing through her black hair. She arched her neck, electrified by the feeling of fingers tracing invisible patterns over her. She ran his hands down her face, and then pinned his arms to the mattress as she dipped down, close enough to see his eyes glint in the moonlight.
"I saw you fighting my henchmen earlier," she whispered. "You had that blue glow. The one you had when you defeated the Lorwardians."
"The mystical monkey power. What about it?"
"Use it."
Ron looked confused for a moment, but he began to concentrate as Shego arched her back and clenched herself to him more tightly. Her hands flared with luminous power as she ran them over Ron's chest, and he began to glow with his own blue aura. The moon's glow was replaced with a haze of cyan as their colors merged into one.
Shego drew in a sharp grasp. Drakken, Midas, her failed attempts at supervillainy, her loss of direction in life – none of it mattered to her. The past melted away, leaving her only in the moment. And it was a pretty good moment, as far as moments went.
The ocean grew restless, and the boat began to rock harder.
XX
The light was still on, but no one sat on the living room couch. A jacket lined in soft white faux-fur lay lazily over the back of the couch, and further along the floor, a shirt lay discarded on the floor. Another shirt lay even further from the couch, in the direction of the bedroom door, which was hanging ajar. A pair of cargo pants just inside the door pointed towards another pair of pants, which in turn pointed towards a bed surrounded by a light scattering of undergarments. No clothing could be found in the bed. Only sheets, Kim, and Monique.
"I love you, Monique."
Monique grasped Kim lightly by the arms, stopping her, and looked up into her piercing green eyes.
"You know you never said that to me before?"
Kim was shocked, and a little embarrassed.
"I haven't?"
"Nope."
"I'm sorry – I had no idea."
"I'm not complaining, I was just a little surprised," laughed Monique. "And I love you too."
Kim dipped down again for a kiss. Although she could no longer taste strawberry, she tasted Monique, which was exactly what she wanted. Two bodies entwined as one as the sheets rustled and twisted in the dim light of a bedside lamp. Nearby, a black covering was draped over the bird cage, as Kim felt a little strange about taking things to the bedroom while their pet budgerigars watched. Monique sometimes teased her for caring about such a strange thing, but she supposed that everyone had their quirks.
"Do I take you for granted, Monique?"
"I don't think so."
"Do I not pay enough attention to you? I'm worried that I'm so absorbed in my work sometimes that maybe I forget to put as much into our relationship as I-"
"Hey," said Monique. "No worries, Kim. I'm not that high-maintenance, okay? I get all the attention I need from you, and believe me, you're paying more than enough attention to me right now. Or you were a second ago, before you started yapping. So get your head in the game."
Kim flashed a grin, and Monique pulled her back down, dispelling all worries, all thoughts outside the moment. Kim whipped soft blankets in a pale blur over their heads, and Monique laughed as she was covered by a whirl of white fabric, peach skin, and red hair.
Their hands clutched each other as skin brushed against skin. Kim released one of Monique's hands and cupped her cheek as the two of them kissed, and then she began to sink lower, lower along the trail of Monique's neck, chest, stomach. A dark hand clutched tightly at a handful of bedsheets as Kim flicked her tongue playfully at the bellybutton she had just found, hidden beneath the sheets. Kim's tongue continued on its path, and Monique let out a small gasp.
On a mission! came a squawk from the covered bird cage.
Kim smiled. She was on a mission. She wanted to make sure that this relationship would last, that she wouldn't make the same mistakes she had in the past. She would tell Monique that she loved her from now on. She would make sure that she didn't drift away. The two of them would stay close. They would talk and encourage and share in their emotions. She would give Monique what she needed.
And Kim made a promise, which Monique confirmed with a faint moan, that she would begin doing that immediately.
XX
Ding!
A faraway buoy sent the chime of its bell echoing through the night air. The ocean's waves lapped over beaches, against the wooden legs of a private dock, and against the hull of a yacht moored to that dock. Inside the yacht's bedroom, Shego rolled off of Ron and lay by his side on the bare mattress, breathing heavily.
"Better than I thought," she told him.
"What can I say - the Ron man came to play."
Ron's statement had a little less chutzpah than it should have. Not only because it was coming from Ron, but because Ron himself sounded so exhausted that the words barely escaped from his mouth. The bedroom compartment was dark again, lit only by moonlight from the hull window as the glow of their powers had already subsided.
Shego turned on her side and bunched one of the bed's pillows under her head. She had no intention of going out again that night – the two of them would sleep in the yacht until morning. If it had enough gas, maybe they'd even steal it and use it to go back to her island. Although they would have to get her hovercraft, Shego remembered with a frown.
Her thoughts began to race as the rush of her body died down. There was no denying it had been an enjoyable night – particularly its culmination in the yacht. But she began to realize who was lying next to her on the mattress: Ron Stoppable. Kim Possible's sidekick, and a total dork to boot. And not even remotely villainous. Maybe he would start clinging to her like a leech. Maybe he would tell everyone about what had happened, and she'd be the laughingstock of the villain community. She could blame it on being drunk, but she couldn't fool herself. Shego knew she had been sobering up even before they got on the yacht.
Maybe she could take him in, train him, groom him into villainy just like she had done with Junior. Ron might have tips and tricks concerning Possible and Global Justice, about other enemies that Shego might face, so he would be an interesting ally to –
No, she thought. Impossible. There was no way someone like Stoppable would go to the dark side. She could see it happening with Kim, possibly, but not Ron. As he began to snore loudly beside her, Shego wondered if she had made a mistake.