Janet refused to say anymore until she'd examined the test results. She didn't want to lead her team in the wrong direction in case she was incorrect, although she didn't think she was.
The team spent the night and then prepared to leave the next morning. For now, they had everything they needed. Griff spoke briefly with Amdahl, telling him they'd return in a few days if they found anything. The native man looked skeptically at the team, especially over at Chavez. Janet wondered what was wrong and turned to look at the young Airman. Her eyes grew big as she noticed that the young biologist's mustache had started to loosen. Janet coughed and surepticiouly rubbed her upper lip. Chavey caught on quickly and grabbing a Kleenex, pretended to sneeze. That gave her the opportunity to repair the facial hair.
Amdahl's eyes were narrowed in suspicion. He didn't quite know what was wrong, but he felt something strange about these men. Still, they hadn't harmed anyone and he didn't need anymore trouble so he let it pass.
"If you want us to take the women, we will do so gladly when we return", Griff offered once again. He really didn't want to see any of them harmed.
Amdahl nodded, but didn't look as if he was too interested in the offer. He was having a very difficult time reconciling his beliefs with what he was feeling.
As Griff, Janet and the team returned through the gate to the SGC, they immediately noticed something was off. There were a number of SF's in the gate room and one of the SG teams was geared up, ready to go. Rather than their usual look of casual excitement, the team looked tense and very serious.
Frasier glanced up and saw the General standing in the Control room. He too had a very serious expression on his face. Oh no, she thought, I hope it isn't Sam and the Colonel.
She looked up questioningly to Hammond and he reached over and spoke into the mike.
"Get checked out, Doctor. Briefing in one hour and we'll compare notes."
"Yes Sir", she answered. She turned to the rest of the team. "Let's go. We'll find out what's going on and then report to the General. Captain", she said, turning to Bigelow, "can you run those tests on the chemicals and when you get the results bring them to the Briefing Room."
"Yes Doctor". The team quickly made their way to the Infirmary for their post-mission check. As soon as every one was ready they headed off to see the General – all except for Bigelow who was running her tests.
They had quickly found out what was happening. Nurse Sibbett was happy to tell them all that had gone on in their absence as she took their blood.
"What!" Janet cried. "He let them go? Why in hell would he do that?" She was angry – surely Dr. Warner knew better. She stopped herself before she said more. It wasn't appropriate for her to say any more about her colleague with her staff present. She still couldn't believe it however. This was a disaster.
As she walked with Griff and the others to the Briefing Room she began to calm down. Thinking about it rationally she realized she couldn't really blame the good Doctor. He was a fine medic but didn't have the same level of experience dealing with weird alien phenomena as did she. He was first and foremost a surgeon, and a damn good one, and usually only saw the patients after they had returned from whatever adventure they'd been on. It was usually she who deal with the weird, the wild and the wonderful.
They took their seats around the large table, waiting for the General to arrive. Warner came in a couple of minutes later and sat down quietly. Janet smiled and acknowledged him but neither spoke. The General entered almost immediately and started the meeting.
"Okay people", he sat down heavily. "Tell me you have some good news?"
Griff spoke, "Things went well on the planet Sir. The local man, Amdahl, was quite cooperative. I don't think he realized we had women with us –"
"I think he may have wondered at the end." Janet interjected.
"Yeah – Chavez' facial hair kind of sagged", he grinned. The Airman looked terribly embarrassed. "Don't worry Airman – you did a great job. No fault of yours your mustache started to come off!" Even the General had to grin at the picture of the petite woman with dark facial hair. He must admit that she looked pretty cute with her short hair. He was going to give her some extra time off to spend with her new husband after being such a trooper about the hair.
"But everything else went fine. The team was able to get some samples, and I discovered some kind of chamber underneath the temple. I couldn't get in but it's pretty obvious the locals didn't build this building. There's some kind of alien force at work there."
"Dangerous?" asked Hammond.
"I don't think there's a threat, if that's what you're asking Sir", the Major replied. "If they were aliens who built the temple and underground chamber they're long gone. I think the people of the planet have turned this into their religion and place of worship after years and years but there's no evidence of any recent activity – except of course of ours and the Goa'uld attack."
"Okay – that's good. What about you Doctor? Did you find anything out about the substance that affected Dr. Jackson and Teal'c?"
"I'd like to wait for the test results Sir, if that's okay. In the meantime, can you tell us what happened with Daniel and Teal'c?" She glanced over at Warner who looked exhausted and almost sick.
The General sighed. "I think we'd better have Dr. Warner tell us what happened. He was the one here." He didn't say it but it was clear from that that it was Warner who had made the decision to let the men out of their cell. From the way the General was speaking, he was not happy with the Doctor.
Warner spent the next few minutes telling exactly what had happened. To give him credit, he didn't try and justify what he'd done. He clearly admitted that he'd been fooled and that he'd made a mistake.
"I honestly thought they were better Janet. They seemed so completely normal. I also figured there was no way the drug could still be in their systems after all that time. I was sure that Teal'c especially would be clear."
Before Janet had a chance to say anything Bigelow arrived and handed her the report. Quietly sitting down she waited for Janet to explain what it said.
"If you'll give me a second Sir I just want to look these over." Janet looked up at the General. At his nod she quickly read the reports, her eyebrows raised in surprise.
"Are you sure these are correct Lieutenant?" she asked Bigelow.
"Yes Ma'am, I checked them three times to make sure. These are correct."
Janet whistled. She'd been right.
"So Doctor, what can you tell us about this drug? When will the effects where off."
"Well Sir, they won't."
"What! What do you mean? Are you telling me there's no cure." This is not what he wanted to hear.
Dr. Warner had a puzzled frown on his face. He was trying to figure out what kind of drug would have this kind of a permanent affect.
"No, I'm sorry Sir, that's not what I meant" She turned to Warner and smiled. "You weren't wrong Mark, the drug would have worn off by the time you saw Daniel and Teal'c. If I'd been in your shoes I would have thought the same thing, that they were all better, especially based on the evidence." She turned back to the General.
"You see Sir, it's not the drug that's affecting them."
"What? But what else would it be? They were definitely affected by it and it was after the ceremony that they changed."
"Yes Sir. I'm not saying that the drug didn't affect them – it certainly did – but it isn't in their systems any more. You see", she stopped and pulled open the report, "they're not drugged – the drug simply allowed the ceremony to affect them."
"Okay Doctor, you've lost me."
"The drug they were given was an extremely powerful hallucinogenic – although without the same obvious affects – which allowed their minds to be manipulated. We've never seen anything quite this powerful; it's clearly alien. But what it would have done is leave the mind open to suggestion. That's why Teal'c was equally affected. His symbiote didn't have time to clear out the chemical before his mind was convinced of the message delivered in the ceremony."
"So, what you're telling me is Daniel and Teal'c were –"
"Brainwashed Sir. They've been brainwashed as have all the men on the planet. The drugs are no longer affecting them, they're not even in their systems anymore. In some ways this is worse – their minds have been manipulated and they are convinced that women are bad."
"Is this something that will wear off?" Hammond asked.
"I don't believe so – at least not right away. Over time it might, as they continue to exist in the real world. That may be why the ceremony was repeated every month on the planet. But even then, it could takes years or it might never wear off."
"What can we do then?" the General rubbed his head in frustration.
"Well, I think the only thing we can do is try to deprogram – or should I say 're' program the men. I think if we get them back in that room with the drugs, but give them a different message, it might work."
"Is it safe?"
"I don't know General, although the men of the planet have been doing it their whole lives and don't appear to have suffered any physical results but I'll certainly do some more tests."
"This doesn't solve the problem of Dr. Jackson and Teal'c. We're going to have to find them first and bring them back."
"That's all supposing Amdahl and his crew are going to let us have access to the temple." Griff spoke up for the first time in a long while. "There's no way to guarantee he'll do the ceremony and even if he did, how could we get him to give a different message."
They all sat there, contemplating how to handle this latest situation. The way Janet was feeling right now she would be totally prepared to go back to the planet and force the damn men into that temple and make them listen. She could even fantasize about what the message would be. The women deserved some special treatment after the years of abuse they'd endured!
"But why?" Hammond asked, puzzled.
"What do you mean Sir", asked Griff.
"Why would anyone do something like this? I don't understand."
Janet looked over at Griff and they both nodded. He turned back to the General and answered briefly,
"The Aschen."
"You think this was done by them? But why and how?"
"No Sir", answered Janet. "It wasn't necessarily them but I think the reason is the same."
When everyone around the table looked confused she continued. "The Aschen were basically carrying out Genocide on other planets – but they did it quietly and surreptitiously by destroying the ability of races to procreate. And the fact was that the races didn't even know they were being destroyed. In this case, whatever race did this found another way to destroy an entire planet of people. They programmed the men to hate all women. I'm sure the intent was the men would rise up and kill all the women, effectively destroying their race. The fact that it didn't happened points to the fact that, either the brainwashing wasn't totally effective, or that this group of people was able to resist, to a point. They didn't kill their women – at least only on rare occasions, although they treated them cruelly – but they did survive."
"But that's awful", exclaimed Andropolis. "That's, that's like something out of a science fiction novel."
"I'm afraid you're right Captain. I'm afraid that's exactly what this is like."
"So we need to get to the men on that planet and reverse what was done to them. Do you think it's possible after all this time?"
"I don't know. I hope so. We may have to do more than one 'ceremony' and we'll have to figure out what we want to 'reprogram' them with. I think that's the only way. I don't know if we can just reverse the belief that they've been brainwashed with – we'll have to change it."
"I think we should tell them that women are the superior sex and need to be waited on. They deserve it after all these years." Chavez spoke up for the first time and her eyes were flashing fire. Boy, the General though,t he wouldn't want to be her husband if she ever got mad!
Her comment caused everyone to laugh (at least the women). The General sat pondering the options.
"Okay, let's get some ideas going folks and see what we can do. We're also seeing if we can locate our runaways – we've asked the Tokra for help again. I'm afraid we're going to wear out our welcome with them! In the meantime, I'll leave your team to come up with a solution. Nice job Doctor, team. Let's hope we can make some things happen."
After they'd been dismissed the science team, Janet and Warner all headed back to the Infirmary. Griff stood looking at the Gate – hoping the members of SG1 were safe.
On the Planet Venora
"You sure this place is safe Teal'c?" Daniel looked around at the seedy bar and worried. This looked like a place where the lowest form of humanity – or in this case aliens – hung out."
"No, this place is not safe Daniel Jackson – but it is better than being discovered. Here people are not asked questions. Just keep your eyes down and your ears open. We may discover where some of Ba'als forces are at present.
The two men walked to an emply table in the corner and sat down, keeping their backs to the wall. There wasn't much light in the corner so they felt somewhat protected from the eyes of those looking to find opportunity of any kind.
They'd been seated for four or five minutes when the waitress, or whatever she was called on Venora, came up to take their order.
"What would you gentlemen like?" she asked in a sultry voice. These two looked better than the usual customers.
"Bring us water woman. Nothing else." Teal'c answered, contempt lacing his voice.
"How about you handsome?" She turned to the younger man. He was eyeing her strangely, an eerie look in his eyes.
"I don't need anything … except you." Daniel leared at her and stood. He then reached out and pulled her to him. Inside he felt a deep sense of hatred and anger – but he was also feeling the stirrings of lust for this woman. She was not unattractive, although she looked like she'd been used and had led a hard life.
"Well that could be arranged", she answered, "for a price." She reached out and stroked his cheek. He immediately grabbed her hand and bent her wrist back until she cried out in pain.
"Don't ever touch me woman", he growled. "Not unless I say you can." He reached over and grabbed her breast, squeezing it painfully. When she protested he slapped her across the face. He then reached down and began to pull up her skirt while forcing her to bend backwards over the table. Teal'c simply watched, a slight grin on his face.
"Stop!" she cried, real fear in her voice. No matter how handsome this man was, there was something terrifying about him. He had a cold look on his face, as if he'd like to see her die.
He simply laughed and continued to push her back. By this time he'd torn her blouse, exposing her breast and had lifted her skirt until it was bunched at her waist. With a cry, she pulled her free hand forward. In it, clutched tightly, was a sharp dagger. Without pause she thrust it upwards, into Daniel's stomach.
With a small gasp, not even audible over the din in the room, he looked at her in shock and then collapsed on top of her. She quckly squirmed out from underneath him, grabbed her torn top and held the pieces together and ran back behind the counter where she spoke to the big man standing there.
It had all happened so fast that Teal'c had barely time to react before the woman was gone. Knowing that something serious had happened he reached down and turned Daniel over. He could see the dagger sticking out of his friend's abdomen. Blood was flowing out of the wound and Daniel's face was still and white.
Teal'c quickly tore a strip of his shirt and made a hasty bandage, attempting to stop the blood. He knew he couldn't pull out the dagger – Daniel could bleed to death. He needed a doctor, and now.
Looking up he saw a number of large men coming towards him. Recognizing that they weren't coming to help, he quickly grabbed Daniel and swung him up over his shoulder. He turned and walked as fast as he could out of the bar. The men after him were hindered by the crowds and the tables.
Once he'd left the building he turned, trying to decide which way to go. It had been many years since he'd been on Venora and didn't have any idea where to find a doctor. The only person he knew was Feemy so he turned and headed back to the old man's home. He knew he wouldn't want to see him, but he had no choice.
It took him precious minutes to get to his destination and he worried that Daniel would not make it. Teal'c could feel the blood falling onto him from his friend.
When he'd finally arrived he knocked quietly but urgently on the door. It took a few minutes but Feemy opened the door.
"What are you doing here Teal'c? I told you to leave. I cannot be seen with you." Feemy's voice cracked in fear.
"I am sorry old friend but I have need of your help. My friend has been hurt and needs a doctor."
"Hurt? What happened? Was it Ba'al?" Since the visit of the two men earlier in the day he'd been paranoid that Ba'al somehow knew what he'd told these men.
"No it was a simple bar fight. A woman", Teal'c spat, "knifed my friend for no reason". I will have to return and kill her."
"No – if you want my help you must promise not to kill this woman." Feemy could see too many questions and too many people coming around his house if Teal'c were to carry out this threat.
"I must –"
"No, you must promise me, give me your word – you will not harm this woman. If you do not agree I will not help you."
Teal'c knew he had no choice. As much as it galled him he knew Daniel's life was more important than vengeance.
"All right old man. I will not harm her. Now let me in. My friend is in a bad way."
Feemy led him in and down a long hall to one of the bedrooms. Teal'c lay Daniel on the bed, seeing immediately how much blood his friend had already lost.
"He looks dead." muttured the trader of information.
"He is not dead", answered Teal'c with certainty. "He needs a doctor. Is there one you can trust?"
"Yes – Dr Fabro - but he's expensive."
"This is all I have", Teal'c pulled some of the small pieces of naquada Daniel had taken and put them in front of Feemy.
The ancient little man picked them up and examined them. "Hmmmm, not much. I tell you what, I will pay for the doctor – if you promise to leave as soon as he is well enough, and you promise never to return."
Teal'c looked at Feemy and nodded. "You will never see me again."
"Okay. I will be gone for a little while. Hopefully I will find him if he's not drunk.' When he saw Teal'c's worried look he laughed. "Don't worry, he's a great doctor if he hasn't been drinking. If he has, he's simply good." On that he left his house in search of the medic.
Teal'c attempted to clean his friend up while not disturbing the dagger that was still protruding from his middle.
"Daniel – why did you do this? Only for the sake of a worthless woman!" After a while there was no more he could do other than hope that Feemy would find the doctor.
It must have been almost a half an hour before his host came back, fortunately followed by a greasy haired little man. Teal'c was positive the man had shifty eyes. He just hoped he could trust Feemy's opinion of this man.
The doctor poked and prodded for awhile. He said a few Mmmmms and a few Hmmmms, but nothing substantive. Finally, he turned and grabbed his medicine bag and began pulling vicious looking instruments out.
"Boil some water", he instructed to Feemy. At least he had some idea of cleanliness, thought Teal'c. The doctor looked up at Teal'c. "You can help. You will need to hold him down if he wakes up while I fix the wound."
"Do you not have medicine to keep him sleeping?" Teal'c asked in surprise. He knew little about medicine, even now, but his experience with Janet and the Infirmary was that people were 'put to sleep' before any kind of surgery.
"Nope – don't have any of that. Where would I get it? Too expensive anyhow."
After he'd thoroughly washed his hands and equipment – and Daniel's torso, he was ready to begin.
"You will hand me the instruments as I need them." Teal'c just nodded, praying Daniel wouldn't wake up during the surgery.
Fortunately Teal'c wasn't squeamish, having witnessed many horrors in his life. He was worried when he saw the amount of blood that spurted out when the dagger was removed. The doctor quickly held a pad over the wound, pressing until the flow had slowed and then stopped. He then began to irrigate and clean the wound. Knife wounds could be wicked for infection.
It was just as he was cleaning the open wound that Daniel began to stir. At first his movements were small, but then he began to twist and turn. He was feeling the agony of the wound and the doctors movements.
"Stop! Tell him to stop Teal'c!" he gasped. "Hurts!" tears were running freely down his cheeks. Teal'c had to hold him tightly so he wouldn't move and disturb the doctor. Feemy had come into the room and was helping by holding Daniel's legs.
The wounded archaeologist began to beg, then groan and finally scream as the pain got too much. In the end he was sobbing. Finally, as Fabro finished and began to stitch the wound, starting with the deep layers of flesh, Daniel passed out, unable to take any more.
"It's a good thing", murmured the Doctor. "I'm surprised he lasted so long. He must be a very brave man."
Teal'c just nodded, feeling uncharacteristically shaky and unnerved. He had hated to see his friend in such pain and be unable to do anything about it.
"Yes, he is a brave man."
The Doctor finished up and bandaged Daniel. Leaving medicine "to stop the infection and the fever' and instructions he cleaned up his tools and left (after having accepted his 'payment' from Feemy).
"If you want to sleep Teal'c, there's a bed in the room next door." Feemy spoke gently, knowing how important the young man was to Teal'c.
"No, I will stay with my friend."
"As you will. Call me if you need anything."
Teal'c simply nodded, never taking his eyes off Daniel. He would stay until his friend was better. Leaving was not an option.
Matsya's Planet
Things had been going so surprisingly well that she was shocked when Jack practically bit her head off. She'd been working on the clasp of the medallion and she'd slipped, poking him slightly. It hadn't been bad, hadn't even broken the surface of the skin so she was taken aback when he'd shouted at her.
She looked up, unsure at first as to whether he was serious or not. When she saw his expression she saw that yes indeed, he was very serious.
Standing up from the bed where they'd been seated, she put the file away and walked to the little table. Without saying anything she began to work on one of her little 'inventions'.
Jack continued to sit on the bed and stare off into space. He eventually stood up and began to wander around the small room. It was clear he was feeling nervous and unable to sit still; unfortunately, there was little room to move. After stubbing his toe and swearing, knocking over some of their wooden dishes and finally kicking the side of the bed with all his might (and swearing mightily in pain) he turned and walked into the bathroom and slammed the door.
What the hell was wrong with him, she wondered. If he'd been a woman she would have suspected hormones, but this was just not like Jack at all. She wondered if the thing on his chest was somehow affecting him?
When he hadn't returned after almost an hour she began to get seriously worried. It was beginning to get dark and was almost time for bed. They didn't have any kind of lamp or light source so basically had to go to bed with the sun.
She walked over and softly knocked on the door. When there was no answer she knocked again. When he didn't reply the second time she gradually opened the door. What she saw worried her even more. Jack was sitting on the floor, wedged between the primitive toilet and the bath. He had his head buried in his hands and looked like he was shaking.
She knelt down beside him. "Jack. What is it? What's wrong?" He didn't answer so she reached out and touched his hand. He jerked away from her, mumbling "leave me alone."
"No Jack I won't. Please, tell me what's wrong." At that he looked up, an expression of anger on his face.
"Why? So you can kiss it and make it all better? Or maybe you'll come up with some genius invention and I'll be just fine. Samantha Carter saves the world again! No thanks – I don't need you."
She was about to stand up and leave him, angry at his words and the way he was treating her, but at the last minute she heard something in his voice that wouldn't let her move. It was as if he was trying to stir up his anger and hate – but that his heart wasn't in it. He didn't really believe what he was saying.
"No Jack – whether or not you need me I'm here and I'm not going anywhere – even if I could. I'm not leaving you." With that she sat on the floor, squeezed into the small space beside him in the tiny little bathroom. She sat with him until she could no longer feel her legs or her butt. She didn't know what this was about but just hoped she'd find out before she became permanently stuck to the floor.
Her thoughts must have carried through to him because all of a sudden he pushed himself to his feet. He went to walk out but at the last minute turned and reached his hand down to her, helping her to her feet. Then he turned and walked out. She limped after him.
He was standing in the middle of the room when she exited, looking at nothing. She walked up to him hoping he would acknowledge her. When, after a few seconds, he looked up she couldn't tell what the expression in his eyes meant. Without warning, he reached out and grabbed her and pulled her tight against his chest. Her heart began thudding, whether from fear or anticipation she couldn't quite tell.
Everything became still and quiet. Suddenly, without warning, he reached down and began to kiss her. The kiss was not gentle – it was frantic, angry, almost violent. At first she responded but then, as he became more agitated, angrier, she became frightened and began to pull away, except he wouldn't let her.
She began to struggle and this just inflamed him even more. He pulled her to him closer, tighter. It was when he began to turn her around, towards the bed, that she truly began to panic. She let out a soft sound of fear, all she could manage with her lips pressed to his.
It was that soft sound that brought Jack back to reality. He suddenly stopped and the realization of what he was doing began to filter through. With a cry he pulled back from her, releasing her completely. He looked at her shocked.
"Oh God – Sam, I'm sorry!" he cried, agony in his voice. "I'm so sorry, so sorry." He turned and again fell to the floor, head buried in his arms. Soon he began to sob – dry racking sounds that sounded so unnatural coming from this strong man.
It took her a few minutes but she finally began to feel calmer. She was eventually able to sit on the bed where she watched Jack. By now he was quiet and totally still, unnaturally still. He hadn't moved at all in many minutes. It was as if he was afraid of what would happen.
That was exactly the case. He believed he had just destroyed any friendship, any hope of anything with Sam. He had used her and hurt her like he had never done to any woman in his life. He was frightened – no terrified – of what had just happened but didn't want to see the terrible results of what he'd done.
A soft voice floated down to him.
"Jack"
He didn't believe it was real. Sam would not speak to him like that, not after what he'd done.
"Jack? Answer me. Speak to me. Please."
He looked up, not believing, yet hoping. He forced himself to meet her eyes. What he saw there made the tears run down his cheeks. All he saw was caring and compassion – and a question. She wanted to know why – and he had to try and tell her.
"I'm sorry Sam, truly I am. I don't know what got into me. Believe me, I've never done anything like that before. I promise – I won't hurt you – I wouldn't – I couldn't hurt you."
"I know Jack. I believe you. But where did that come from? Why did that happen? I don't blame you and I won't hold it against you, but I need to know. You owe me that much."
"Yes", he sighed. "I do. And I won't blame you if you do hold it against me." He paused as if trying to figure out how to tell her what was wrong.
"You know last night?" she looked at him curiously. She didn't remember anything unusual about the last evening "You were talking – about the days – about how long we'd been gone?"
Yes, she remembered that. She'd suddenly gotten curious about what day it was so she'd tried to figure it out.
'You sat there figuring out the dates. Suddenly you announced that it must be September 23rd. That's what did it."
"September 23rd? I don't understand. Don't you like that date?" she couldn't figure out what this was about.
"Not the 23rd – the 24th?"
"What about it?"
"I don't like it – September 24th. That was the day-" he stopped, unable to continue.
Suddenly, like a bolt of lightening on a dark night, everything came clear. September 24th must be an anniversary – the anniversary he dreaded each year.
"Is that the date- ?" she asked tentatively.
"Yeah", he spoke so softly she could barely hear. "That's the day my son shot himself with my gun. That's the day my life ended." He leaned his head down on his arms. She didn't know what to say or do. He was an intensely private man and, although they'd shared a lot these last few weeks, he'd never spoken about his son.
"I wasn't angry at you and I'm so sorry for what happened. I just felt so damned – useless – stuck here, unable to help either of us. And then I got to thinkin' about Charlie and the fact that I was a useless father – worse than useless – I killed him. I got so mad at myself but instead of taking it out on me I took it out on you. I'll never forgive myself for that."
She sat for a minute in silence and then began to speak.
"Seems to me you don't forgive yourself for a lot of things." He lifted his head and looked at her, surprise and – something else – in his eyes.
"I think maybe it's time you did. You're a good man Jack – but even you can't be expected to have all the answers, all the solutions, all the time. And you know what – you can't always be perfect either. You've made mistakes – tragic ones – but nobody is blaming you except you."
He sat there for a few minutes until finally he looked over at her. He looked so lost and forlorn she could no longer stay away. She moved over and sat down beside him. Leaning into him she offered the comfort of her presence. When he didn't move – out of guilt and fear – she reached over and put her arms around his chest and buried her head in the crook of his neck.
"I think you need some snuggle time", she whispered. He turned into her and leaned down so that his head rested on hers. She could feel the warmth of his tears trickling down her neck.
"I miss him so much!" Her heart broke at his words and she looked up, forcing his head up as well. She looked into his eyes, awash in tears, and felt her heart stir. Without thought and without motive she leaned forward and pressed her lips against his. This time it was a gentle kiss, a kiss filled with compassion and tenderness and forgiveness …. and yes, with longing.
At first he sat there, not resisting, but not returning her kiss. As she continued, his lips grew soft and he carefully, gently followed her lead. He leaned in a little closer and began to take part. He allowed his mouth to open as she requested entry with her tongue. She continued to take the lead – they both needed that after what had happened – but he was fully engaged.
As the kiss continued it became less a kiss of compassion – and more one of passion. Soon they were seeking, looking for more – for something deeper and more meaningful. Without thought or plan they both fell over so they were lying on the floor, arms and legs entwined. Their mouths and hands grew more frantic, the breaths became shorter, the heart beats faster.
Soon, his hands reached under the short tunic, searching for the soft and inviting flesh of the woman he loved. Her hands reached down and felt that flesh on his legs that she'd viewed and longed for so much. She could feel his passion and his longing as his body gave away his desire. Their movements became more heated, more frantic.
It was only when they rolled into the side of the bed, Jack hitting his head, that they realized where they were. Jack stopped – his stillness quickly communicating to Sam that something had changed. She looked at him, a question in her eyes. He looked back also with a question. He rolled away from her and stood up – leaving her cold and alone.
As he stood there, looking down, they both knew they had come to a watershed moment. Now was the moment that things would go forward, or stay the same. In both their eyes was desire and love. But neither of them recognized the love in the other – only the desire. Could they move ahead or should they? That was the question.
Jack stood, one more second, and then reached his hand down. Sam grasped his fingers and pulled herself up. They stood there, one more minute, looking at each other.
Their decision was made.