Disclaimer: Nada.
Chef had threatened almost everyone at the playa to give him back his room key. Instead of a room key, all he got was excuses, giggles and smirks and fingers pointing at each other. None of this led him to a room key, he did however get an offer from Izzy that involved an axe, he didn't except it.
Later that night, Chef was still obsessively trying to figure out which one of these kids stole his key. He decided that he was just doing to keep screaming at them and breaking every door down if he had to! He went to check on the old cast hoodlums to make sure they weren't up to anything first. Duncan, Alejandro, Geoff, Justin, Trent, Lightning, Jo and Eva all were beating up Harold in his room, Chef was going to stop it but Harold started telling him that he was a bad chaperone so he pretended to not hear anything.
Chef decided that he was going to go and interrogate Anne Maria, however right as he was about to open Anne Maria's he heard sobbing coming from the room across the hall. He didn't know who's room it was and quite frankly, he didn't give a shit, in fact if it was a girl sobbing he would have just assumed that someone cheated on someone, everyone switched partners on this show so he was used to it, when he heard the sobs were manly, he knew he had to go and tell them to grow a pair!
"What the hell is going on in here?!" Chef used the key card and swung the door open.
Chef was in shock, Dawn was sitting on her bed surrounded by tissues trying to calm down a sobbing DJ, this upset Chef since he recently found out that he was DJ's father.
"What the heck is going on here?!" Chef yelled.
"DJ is very upset and ha-" Dawn tried to tell him but Chef cut him off.
"Are you trying to seduce DJ?!" Chef yelled at Dawn.
"I would never do that." Dawn told him. "DJ has come to me for advice, as he feels that I'm the only one who won't laugh at his family situation. DJ feels that you don't care about him and that's why you were not in his life for the first 16 years."
"There is nothing wrong with my family and I already knew he was my son." Chef rolled his eyes. "I helped him cheat in season two! what more could he possibly want?"
"Not being lied to by my mama and you!" DJ yelled at him. "How can you ignore me when I live here?!"
"I've been doing a damn good job." Chef told him. "If I let you call me daddy then I'd have everyone else calling me daddy, too!"
"It's quite clear to me that this family has some issues." Dawn assured them. "Would you like to sit down and talk out all of your issues?"
"I'd like for DJ to get out of your room!" Chef yelled. "I hate therapists! Do you have any booze?"
"No Chef, I do not have booze." Dawn sighed. "I'm 16 years old, I do not drink and I assure you that this will be well worth it. Please, have a seat."
"Do you have my room key?!" Chef demanded to know.
"See? You only care about yourself." DJ crossed his arms. "This is why I hate you. It's always about Chris or your room key!"
"So, did you steal my room key as revenge?" Chef glared at DJ.
"Sit." Dawn sighed and pointed to the chair in the corner and glared at Chef. "Chef, your aura is horrible!"
"That's because I can't sleep." Chef sighed and sat down in the chair "If I hug DJ can I leave?"
"I'd like a hug and maybe a puppy." DJ smiled. "All I want is for Chef hatchet to try to be a better parent!"
"I tried." Chef mumbled. "I tried to be a good parent and give him a chance to win in the middle of season two. It was my idea to see him in the first place, how the hell do you think you got on this show, DJ!"
"You got me on this show?" DJ asked.
"Duh." Chef rolled his eyes
"I hate you, I just wanted to go home and be with my mama and have a normal life!" DJ sobbed. "Now, I'm forced into a contract with Chris and it's your fault! I hate this place and I'm not even going to be in any future seasons!"
"Oops?" Chef looked at Dawn.
"See?" Dawn smiled. "I think we're making progress!"
"Where were you when I had bad luck in season 3?" DJ glared at Chef.
"I already told you, DJ" Chef sighed. "It was a one night stand and I hated your mama! I was drunk and it's not my fault. I'm suffering too! I'm stuck here with a bunch of teenagers!"
"I want you to do something for me." DJ insisted.
"That's a wonderful idea, DJ." Dawn agreed. "I think that you two should do something together!"
"I have an idea!" DJ happily told him. "We can go fishing on the island, it would be fun!"
"You're idea of fun is stupid." Chef told DJ. "Why can't we do what I want?"
"What would you like to do, Chef?" Dawn smiled and Chef got a big grin on his face.
"Let's go have a threesome with Zoey!" Chef happily suggested. DJ and Dawn looked scared.
"Maybe you can do something that isn't sexual?" Dawn smiled. "Fishing sounds like an appropriate idea!"
"I guess I can do that." Chef rolled his eyes. "We can trick Bridgette into coming with us, then once she gets on the boat we paddle out into the lake and we can have our way with her and nobody will ever hear the screams!"
"What is wrong with you, Chef Hatchet?" Dawn's eyes got wide.
"See? This is why we don't talk at all." DJ told her. "He always makes things sexual."
"There is nothing wrong with sex!" Chef yelled. "It's a natural and amazing gift from above!"
"I don't want to sleep with anyone." DJ told him. "Can't we just go to the zoo?"
"Are you gay?" Chef asked him. "I mean it's totally cool if you are! We can just have a threesome with a guy! You, me and Chris? or maybe You, Trent and Chris?"
"This is hopeless." Dawn sighed. "I would suggest that the both of you never speak to each other ever again. Now please leave my room, I require sleep and it's almost 6:00am. You two have spent the night fighting and accomplished nothing."
"Sorry." DJ told her. "Thanks for listening."
"I still don't have a room key!" Chef yelled. "You're like a psychic witch, tell me where I can find my key!"
"Vito's mischievous." Dawn smirked. "I would suggest going to talk with Mike."
Dawn shooed both DJ and Chef out of her room and slammed the door behind them.
"I'm going to make breakfast." Chef told DJ. "Do you want to help me put some ex lax in Geoff's eggs?"
"No!" DJ yelled. "He's my friend and he's a nice guy."
DJ stormed off and Chef went to make breakfast, still without a hotel key.
So, Chef and DJ used Dawn as a shrink and talked the whole night and still aren't any closer, Chef also still has no room key. This isn't my favorite chapter. But I am REALLY excited for chapter 9, which is obviously going to be Trent.