It's been six weeks since her first night with the charming, and handsome Detective Anthony Mahlon. She sits at her kitchen table, alone, in silence. She stares at a box of cereal, but she has no desire to eat it. She looks down at the object sitting on the table next to her, the one responsible for completely ruining her appetite.
"Kate I don't understand what you're trying to tell me. You didn't finish telling me what happened when you showed up at the detective's apartment, before you jumped to the next thing."
"It wasn't the next thing. It was what happened before."
"Can we go back to what it is that you wanted to tell what's his face?"
"Okay," she takes a deep breath.
He touches her hand. He presses his warm lips against the temple of her forehead.
"If this is too much we can stop. If you're not ready to talk about the accident I will understand."
She looks at him, questioningly, "Rick you are the most impatient human being I know."
"I am, but you are more important than my burning desire to know how this story ended up."
"You already know how it ended up."
"I do?"
"I end up here, with you."
"I am curious how we got here."
"You know how we got here."
He nods, "I am more interested in how you got here," he admits.
He looks at the female detective standing in front of him. He can see the anxiety, and uncertainty on her face. He takes a step closer to her, and changes to a softer tone.
"Kate, whatever it is you can tell me."
"I just don't know how," she admits.
"Whatever it is, I can handle it. So just be straight with me."
"Okay," she nods in agreement.
"What is it that you wanted to tell me?"
"I," she exhales, "I am pregnant."
"Oh."
"It..."
He cuts her off, "I get it, it's mine."
"Yeah," she nods in confirmation.
He points towards the living room, "Do you want to have a seat?"
"Okay."
"So you went to his parents house that weekend to tell them that you were pregnant?"
"What?"
"Why would you go there to tell them? You weren't together. You weren't that far along. I don't understand."
"We didn't go the weekend that I told him I was pregnant."
"So you waited a while, until you figured out what you wanted to do?"
"We waited quite a while."
"And after the accident..." he trails off.
She swallows hard. She tries to keep the tears from falling, but it proves to be futile. The warm wet drops fall from her eyes, and trail down her cheeks. "All of it was an accident. It was never my intention to get pregnant. What happened in that intersection was an accident. All of it was an accident. Every day I wish that I could take it back."
"I am so sorry."
"After I realized what had happened I was so angry. I was so angry at Tony that I didn't ever want to speak to him again. We weren't in a relationship, and I was glad that he didn't come around afterwards."
"You blamed him because he is the one that made you go to New Jersey to see his parents?"
"I didn't want to go. I never wanted to go. He made me feel guilty. He was an only child. It was their first grandchild. What kind of monster would I have been to deny them that joy?"
"Did you ever forgive him?"
"I don't know that I can ever forgive him."
"Have you seen him since the accident?"
"I saw him a few days ago. He's married, and he has two daughters. He moved on, in a way that I haven't been able to. In a way, that I am not entirely certain, I will ever be able to."
"The accident wasn't his fault," Castle points out.
"I know that."
"So why are you so angry at him?"
"He's not the only person that I'm angry at."
"What do you mean?"
"It was my fault that we were on the road that night. We were supposed to stay all weekend. We fought, and I insisted that we go home. If I had just stayed the accident never would have happened."
"It wasn't anyone's fault, Kate. It was an accident."
"I want to believe that. I have tried to believe that, but I just can't."
"Why not?"
"Why did he have to save me? Why did he have to pull me out of that car?"
"Because he cared about you."
"He pulled me out of that car, first without thinking about the consequences. Why? Why didn't he just wait? Why did I have to live?" She sobs.
"Your life means something, Kate. You have made a difference in this world, that is why you lived. That is why you are still here."
"It isn't fair. None of it is fair."
"I know that it seems that way, but things happen for a reason."
She looks at him in disgust, "Don't say that. There is no reason good enough for what happened. He shouldn't have saved me."
"Why not?"
"Do you know the last thing I remember before waking up in the hospital?"
"No," he shakes his head.
"Watching that car ignite. It was completely engulfed in flames in a matter of seconds."
"You could have been in that car. You are lucky to be here."
She clenches her jaw, "Luck has nothing to do with it. It's his fault. He shouldn't have saved me."
"Why not?"
"He shouldn't have picked me. I wish he had left me in that car."
"What good would have come from you being dead?"
"He could have saved him."