Holy crap, the third update in a week!

In the kitchen of his small apartment, Wesley frowned unhappily at his teapot, which he had just filled with water and placed on the stove. Considering that he had managed to save Cordelia's life and had then spent a not-entirely-awkward half hour with her at the Espresso Pump (which, of course, had not been a date, because that would be inappropriate), he had very good reason to be jumping up and down in glee, and possibly singing.

Instead, all he could think about was how spectacularly he had failed to put up an actual fight. Everything he had learned in his training sessions with Angel seemed to have fled his mind when he confronted the vampire, and he had been reduced to brandishing a cross and a bottle of holy water at her with trembling hands.

To make matters worse, the vampire in question had been his Slayer's best friend less than a day ago. Was there something he could have done to prevent this terrible thing? Perhaps if he had discouraged Buffy from including her friends so much in her slaying, the poor girl would never have been placed in harm's way. He hadn't interacted with Willow to any great extent, but what little time he had spent in her company had been sufficient to make him like her very much. She was sweet, unassuming, extremely bright, and fiercely loyal—or, at least, she had been. Now that girl was gone, and a demon had taken her place.

Something would have to be done, and soon. Wesley didn't know how Buffy would handle the news, but he would have to tell her as quickly as possible. Would she be able to eliminate the creature with the face of her friend? Would she hate him if he did it for her to spare her the pain, or would she prefer that to having to endure something similar to when Angelus had been loose in Sunnydale?

But would he even be able to do it, though, or would he simply become her first victim from within the Slayer's inner circle? His performance against her that evening suggested that the latter would be far more likely. Some Watcher he was turning out to be.

Wesley could practically hear his father's rebuking voice in his mind as he allowed these miserable thoughts to consume him. Cold, distant, and perpetually dissatisfied, Roger Wyndam-Pryce had never done much to improve his son's self-confidence. Whenever Wesley failed to overlook his own shortcomings, they bore heavily down upon him thanks to all those years of having them pointed out to him at length by that man.

Of course, Wesley thought, if his father really knew what was going on in Sunnydale, he would be more likely to disown him than to innumerate his faults in typical fashion. After all, Wesley's best friend was a vampire (and a particularly infamous one at that), he had gone to great lengths to improve the existence of the aforementioned vampire and was merrily allowing him to pursue a very serious romantic relationship with one of the Slayers in his charge, and he had been going behind the Council's back for months. His father might actually have a heart attack before he would be able to get around to the business of disowning him if he found out about any of this, but that was hardly a silver lining.

Wesley wasn't looking for paternal approval, though. He knew that, on these matters, at least, he was firmly in the right. He had no regrets about his friendship with Angel or his efforts to protect him from the Council. But now, if only these convictions could manifest as something that would help him in a fight.

[o]

After brooding over his cup of tea (which was cold by the time he actually got around to drinking it), Wesley prepared to set off for the library to address the problem of Willow. Acting on his deeply rooted belief that one could never be too prepared, he geared up with the same cross and bottle of holy water he had threatened Willow with before, as well as a crossbow, a few stakes, and a second cross even larger than the first, which he hung around his neck. He would've taken more, but it would have become too cumbersome, and there was already a fairly impressive arsenal at the library.

When he got there, he was alarmed to find Buffy, Angel, Mr. Giles, that extremely pensive boy who kept changing his hair color, and Xander all milling about, apparently unaware that the girl in their midst, who appeared to be busily working on the computer, was a demon. He felt a small twinge of disappointment that Cordelia was absent, but quickly banished it, for it was hardly relevant to the very serious matter at hand.

"Hey, Wes," said Angel, noticing his presence first. The others looked around and made various signs of acknowledgement, Buffy's being the warmest after Angel's. Willow looked up from the computer and gave a cheery little wave.

Wesley eyed her with deep apprehension, then shot Angel a significant look and jerked his head in the direction of the hall from which he had just come. Angel stood at once and followed him out, Buffy casting a curious glance after them as they left the library.

"What's up?" asked Angel in concern once Wesley had stopped and turned to face him. He noticed with some discomfort the large cross Wesley was wearing, and he raised his eyebrows at the stakes protruding from Wesley's pockets and the crossbow in his hands.

"Are you honestly unaware that there is a vampire in that library?" said Wesley incredulously. He knew Angel had much keener senses than any of the rest of them, and could not therefore understand how he had apparently failed to notice anything different about Willow.

"I was the only vampire in that library," said Angel, bemused.

"Most unfortunately, that is not the case," said Wesley, his frustration beginning to show. "I was here earlier tonight and was just able to rescue Miss Chase from Willow."

"Oh," said Angel, and he chuckled as comprehension dawned. Wesley looked highly affronted by this reaction, and opened his mouth to protest, but Angel didn't give him the chance. "You're a little late to the game, Wes," he said, still chuckling. "The Willow you saw wasn't the one who's in the library right now."

"What? What are you talking about?" said Wesley in bewilderment.

"Well, pretty much, an ex-vengeance demon tried to resort to witchcraft to get her powers back, and instead we got the Willow from an alternate dimension. She was the vampire. We sent her back about an hour ago."

"Ah," said Wesley. It took a moment for him to fully process this very odd explanation. Once he succeeded, he felt as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. "So, er, this Willow, I suppose, is still all right, then?"

"She's all right," said Angel. "She's still working on getting into the Mayor's files."

Wesley let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, good," he said. "I've been fretting about how to break the news to Buffy that her dearest friend had been turned. It's been dreadful."

"Yeah," said Angel. He looked past Wesley in an unfocused sort of way, the memory of stalking Jenny Calendar down this very hall suddenly flashing across his mind. His gaze was caught again by the cross Wesley wore, and he couldn't look away. "Last spring was hard enough on Buffy—on all of them." His head lowered an inch or two, casting his features into shadow.

Wesley watched him carefully and felt a terrible pang of sympathy. He could practically see the waves of guilt and anguish emanating from him.

"They don't need to go through that again," said Angel quietly, still staring at the cross as though hypnotized. "Especially not with someone like Willow." He remembered what Angelus's plans had been before they changed with the unearthing of Acathla. Willow was to be one of the ones he would have turned. He would have drawn it out like he had done with Drusilla, to give Buffy a preview of what would happen to her. His eyes closed and his brow furrowed against the familiar onslaught of the past.

"Angel," said Wesley a little more loudly than normal conversational volume. Angel's head snapped up again, and his eyes focused back on the Watcher's face. "That wasn't you," he said firmly. He half expected Angel to contradict him. He had done it before, more than once. Now, however, he said nothing, but he looked as though he desperately wished for the power to agree. "And it never will be again," Wesley went on.

A silence stretched between them, but eventually Angel broke it, appearing to emerge as he did so from whatever dark place his mind had wandered to. "Let's go back," he said, nodding back up the hall towards the library doors.

"Wait!" said Wesley suddenly. Angel looked inquiringly at him. "The training sessions," he said, his shoulders drooping slightly. "I'm not sure they're doing the trick."

"What makes you say that?" asked Angel, frowning. "It's not a short process, Wes. You're already a lot better than you were, but you can't expect to become a proficient fighter after just a few weeks."

"Can't I at least expect to be able to duplicate my performance during training when in actual combat, though?"

"In time, yeah." Wesley looked slightly put out, so Angel went on, "Sparring is completely different from a real fight because fear isn't a factor. Sparring is safe, controlled. A real fight is not. Once you learn how to push past the fear, instinct and reflex can take over, and that's where sparring and training come in."

"I suppose," said Wesley, though he didn't seem altogether reassured.

Without warning, Angel aimed a punch at Wesley's head. Wesley let out a cry of alarm, but blocked the blow automatically by sweeping Angel's fist aside with his right forearm. "Have you lost your mind?" he demanded angrily.

"No," said Angel, grinning. "I was testing your reflexes. You passed." He shrugged. "Looks like the training sessions have been doing the trick." He turned and walked back into the library, smirking.

Wesley's face lit up in delight, but he forced it back into a serious expression and cleared his throat, though there was still something of a swagger in his step when he followed Angel through the swinging doors.

Got the title from Wesley's line in canon after he saved Cordelia from Vamp Willow. *snicker* I couldn't figure out a way to include his silly little "grrr" thing, though, alas. Huh. I like doing these character study type chapters when there's nothing much to change in the canon plot. Especially when the characters for study are my two favorite characters in the Buffyverse. Heee. Also, it's interesting to think how differently Wesley and Liam reacted to paternal disappointment. I hadn't really thought about that before I wrote this chapter. Anyway, I'm going to try to give "Season 9" some attention now, though it would be sort of nice to just plow through to the end with this one. *shrug* I guess it's up to my muse.