Lanie stood in the apartment that she and Esoposito had been sharing for days now. It looked so much different now. The police had ruled her killing Hayes as self defense and she went back to Espositos apartment. He had been in the hospital for three days now. His infection was serious but the doctors were sure he'd make a full recovery.

Her leg still needed the brace but crutches were no longer needed. She had been released from the hospital but ordered to attend a class for cops who had shot people in the line of duty and in self defense. She had gone straight back to his place after being released and cleaned up the apartment.

She cleaned up the blood with Kates help and changed the sheets on the bed she also had somebody come fix the door. The apartment looked the same now as the day she came but it was still so different. The memories echoed. The shower and that spot on the kitchen floor were happy ones. The window seat where she and Esposito almost kissed would still make her smile. The bed and bedroom terrified her.

Sure she and Esposito had been in that bed together but that wasn't what came to mind. When she went into that bedroom all that she felt was terror and dread. Images of a man determined to hurt her and kill Esposito. Holding her down onto the bed, Holding her in a choke hold and her killing him.

She hear a noise behind her and turned to see Esposito standing in the doorway. He looked better he had more color. He was still weak and had to take it easy both of them were given a week off of work. Once the week was up her life would go back to normal he would be on desk duty for at least 2 months. He walked into the apartment and she noticed how tired he looked.

"So...you're leaving?" He asked and she gave him a smile.

"You didn't think I'd stay here for ever did you?" She tried to tease but her heart was breaking. She wanted to stay she wanted him to want her to stay. If he would only ask her.

"No, I guess not" He gave her a weak smile. He wanted her to stay so bad it hurt but he wasn't going to hold her back. She said she was going home and he would let her go. If he thought it'd do any good he'd ask her to stay but he didn't want to put her in an awkward position.

"I kind of got used to seeing you" He said softly and she bit her lip.

"I will still see you at work and you have my number" She wanted him to say he'd call her but he didn't.

"Yeah, I might go stay with Rosie and Mom for awhile anyway" He said and she nodded.

"Tell them I said hello"

"I will" He promised and they stood there in an awkward silence before she picked up her bag.

"Thank you...so much for everything...I know it was hard and it wasn't exactly a vacation"

"You're wrong...there were moments that I...wouldn't trade" She smiled.

"Thank you" She went over to him and kissed his cheek when she went passed him he turned.

"Lanie"

"Yeah?" When she turned around she look so hopeful and happy. He sighed he had to let her go.

"Don't be a stranger" He said and her smile faded. She nodded then turned and left closing the door behind her and he sighed the apartment felt so empty.

Lanie was sitting on her couch Kate was in a large chair beside her. They were drinking wine and had just finished their weekly girls dinner. This time though Lanie just wasn't into it.

"He just watched you leave?" Kate asked and Lanie nodded. She had tears in her eyes.

"Yeah, He didn't say anything...well no he mentioned how much fun our...you know...was" She wiped a stray tear.

"I just can't believe that he would do that to you" Kate shook her head and Lanie shrugged she set her wine aside and winced.

"Hey, Are you feeling alright? You don't look so good" Kate was concerned.

"I'm fine. I've just been tired lately" Lanie sighed and then smiled at Kate.

"So when is your date with Castle?"

"In a few days" Kate smiled and Lanie tried to be happy for her friend.

"Does he know you stole his clothes?" Kate grinned and Lanie looked down at the shirt she was wearing. The shirt she had been living in since she left. The shirt she had taken off of him and then put on herself after their one night in bed.

"I don't know what I was thinking" Lanie shook her head.

"you were thinking it's the only way to stay close to him.

Esposito was sitting on his couch. Ryan and Rosie were over to visit since at the last minute he backed out of staying with his mom for awhile. They came over and found him on the couch in a pathetic state holding a tiny pink razor.

"Dude, You need help" Ryan said for the tenth time.

"I know, I just can't get over it...she was almost mine"

"I think it's sweet" Rosie piped in.

"I think it's stupid" Ryan countered.

"I found it in the bathroom. I don't know it reminds me of her...so tiny" He shrugged and Ryan rolled his eyes.

"Why don't you go to her house? Go tell her how you feel" Rosie suggested and Esposito shook his head.

"She wanted her freedom. I can't deny her that"

"So you're going to let the best thing that ever happened to you just walk out of your life?"Rosie demanded and he shrugged again.

"I guess so"