Link made his way into Castle Town. Midna sighed impatiently, desperate to be on her way. "Remind me why we're here."
Link sighed patiently, saying for the umpteenth time, "We can't find the mirror shard until we know where to look. Telma's gang may have the answer."
Midna grunted ill-temperedly, disappearing into his shadow. Link made his way through the streets, shrugging past people carrying vases or baskets. Stopping beside a large, colourful tent, he fingered the Rupees in his wallet, debating whether to give the STAR game a go. Deciding against it, he moved on, finally coming to Telma's bar.
Link opened the door, surprised to see Rusl standing there. He embraced Link tightly, pulling him into the bar. "I can't tell you how sorry I am about Ilia," he said.
"How did you know?" Link asked, dumbfounded.
"I have my ways," Rusl said mysteriously.
"Ilia? What happened?" Telma asked from behind the bar. "She didn't get herself into any trouble, did she?"
Link closed his eyes, a tear making its way down his cheek. The pain reawakened in his breast, accompanied by the howl of a wolf only he could hear. Be strong, he thought, taking a deep breath.
He looked Telma straight in the eye. "Please, tell me," she said. "Give it to me straight. I can handle it."
"You want it straight?" Link snarled. "She killed herself yesterday. Stabbed herself in the heart."
"Oh, Gods," Telma whispered. How had this happened? Ilia seemed to be such a strong individual, always finding the strength to carry on.
Rusl gently placed a hand on Link's shoulder. "I suggest we not dwell on this matter," he said quietly. "Ilia's death is a tragedy, that is for sure, but we will mourn when the time comes. For now, we must focus on the kingdom."
Link looked Rusl in the eye. "I couldn't have said it better myself."
As Link walked towards the table, Midna formed a mental link with him. I don't like this, she thought. It seems like a waste of time.
Relax, Link thought back. We can focus on what needs doing. This is important.
Two hours later…
"And so then the drunk says, 'That aint no cherry pie! That's my wife!'"
Link, Rusl and Shad collapsed in laughter as Auru took a bow on top of the table.
"Wait, wait, I got one," Rusl slurred, gesturing with his mug. He didn't seem to notice as beer slopped over the rim. "Okay, why did the Cucco cross the path?"
Still chuckling, Link said, "Okay, I'll bite. Why?"
"Who gives a shit, as long as it ends up on my plate?"
The table exploded with laughter yet again. Ashei challenged Shad to a drinking contest. Three shots later, Shad could no longer see clearly, despite his glasses. "How many fingers am I holding up?" Ashei said, sticking her middle finger up.
Shad thought for a moment. "Three," he said honestly.
Ashei laughed, looking at Auru sprawled drunkenly on the floor. Tipping her chair backwards, she rested her feet on the table. "Man," she remarked, "You guys really can't hold your liquor." She tossed back the whiskey in her glass like it was water. Moments later, the chair tipped over backwards, leaving her sprawled on the floor, snoring.
Rusl chuckled. "Let's give everyone still conscious a treat. Telma!" He gestured to the woman behind the bar. Telma closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose between thumb and forefinger. Why did she put up with them? "Yes?" she replied sweetly.
"Break out the three hundred!" Rusl said, unnecessarily loud.
As Telma ducked down behind the bar, Rusl turned back to Link and Shad. "Boy, are you guys in for a treat," he said, rubbing his hands together. The fact that he still had the coordination to do that astounded him. "Telma's got a bottle of three hundred year old gin. Like drinking honey."
Telma came over, pouring tiny measures of a dark amber liquid into shot glasses from a dusty bottle. Link reached for his glass, noticed he was a foot off, tried again, and managed to grab it. "Here's to Ilia's memory," he proclaimed, holding the shot in the air. "Hear, hear," Rusl said, pouring his down his throat. The last thing Link remembered clearly was tipping his shot back. Then oblivion.
Link woke up with a splitting headache, a sore shoulder, and an annoying itching sensation between his shoulder blades. The itching was quickly explained as he realized he was lying on an anthill. He leapt up, brushing the biting insect off him. He looked around, realizing he was in Hyrule Field, a good quarter league from Castle Town. He then looked down, and realized he was stark naked.
What the hell happened last night? Link thought through his pounding hangover. He slowly made his way to the walls of Castle Town, noting with some irritation that the gates were locked. He pounded on the gate. "Hey! Open up!"
He winced, holding a hand to his forehead. The loud noise had drilled straight into his skull. "Well, you're in a bit of trouble, aren't you?"
Link looked up, seeing a guard looking over the battlements. "Looking for this?" the guard said, dangling Link's tunic over the wall.
"Yeah, some clothes would be nice. Now give them to me before I have to come up there and kill you."
"Love to see you try," another voice said. More guards were coming over, attracted by the commotion he was making. A few wolf-whistled and threw down green Rupees.
"For fuck's sake, just give me my clothes!" Link shouted. "I'm really hung over, and I have important things that need doing."
"Fine, ruin our fun," the guard said. He dropped Link's tunic, making sure it landed in a puddle. Link scrambled over, pulling it on as fast as he could. While he was doing that, Midna came out of his shadow, making sure she was out of sight of the guards. "Well," she said. "That was certainly productive. Not only did you get nothing done, you humiliated yourself in front of all of Hyrule. Do you have anything to say for yourself?"
Link's growl only amused her more. Grinning wickedly, she held her hand out and snapped her fingers right beside his ear. At the sudden sound, Link ducked his head, making a sound like a whining dog. "You really partied hard last night." Midna said. "I'm not going to get into half of what you did after drinking that gin."
Link growled again in reply, and stomped back into Castle Town.
The moment he staggered into Telma's bar, she passed him a small sack of ice. Grunting a word of thanks, he pressed it against his head, grimly surveying the group of adventurers. Rusl also held an ice pack, groaning whenever someone talked. Auru was still passed out on the floor, in the exact same position Link had last seen him in.
A spluttering sound drew his attention, and Link looked over in time to see Telma plunge Ashei's head into a bucket of ice water. Telma held her under for a few seconds, then released her. Ashei rose up, coughing, but seeming much more alert. "Okay," she said, catching her breath. Walking over to the table, she kicked Auru. His only response was a loud snore.
Groaning, she sat down at the table. Shad seemed perfectly ordinary, except he blushed whenever someone said the word "bottlecap". Link had yet to fathom why. Rusl gingerly took the ice pack away from his head, laying it on the table. "To business?" he said weakly. Link nodded. "To business," he agreed.