CHAPTER 5 Sometimes People WANT to Disappear

Talana was feeling snippy. There was no other way to describe it, and she knew she was taking it out on those around her. Why, she'd even snapped at little Rofel when he'd redelivered his breakfast porridge in her lap that morning and him too little to understand. She'd hugged him after, when she'd cleaned them both up of course but she felt so restless. The snow outside was dingy grey with blackdust, crackdust and she wanted to do something, but nothing appealed. There were records to copy to help Pilgra and she wanted nothing to do with them.

"You are keeping me awake." Grumbled Mirrith. Shards and shells, even Mirrith was snippy!

Then it dawned on her.

"It's more than a year since you last rose, isn't it?" She asked Mirrith. Mirrith said that she neither knew nor cared. The light was bad; but Talana's practised eye detected an increasing golden gleam to her hide, and her bad mood evaporated.

oOoOo

Mirrith rose late in the afternoon two days later, and attracted enough suitors to satisfy her vanity before Laranth caught her and brought her home. The weyrlings had a holiday and spent most of it getting wet and snowy. Y'lara sought out T'lan afterwards and sought her advice on remaining celibate until her Tanath rose as opposed to getting in some practise first. Talana considered deeply.

"My first experience was dragon-driven" she explained "But it was second-hand because of me hearing all dragons. I'd be inclined, if you're sure you've got M'kel well hooked, to have him first and it will help to bond your dragons too."

Y'lara blushed.

"Is it obvious?" She asked, laughing self-consciously.

"To everyone but M'kel." Grinned Talana. "Go for it. He needs someone special – and I think you've got what it takes." Impulsively she hugged Y'lara. "Just ask Calla for the herbs – take some time to enjoy him before you start having babies." She added, "Why don't you get him to take you to Lord Bargen's winter Gather – getting him to help sort out Tanath first, so you arrive late and stay late – then you've a good excuse to suggest going to his weyr so you don't disturb her."

Y'lara grinned.

"Nice idea." She said. "I think I'll do just that." She had blushed in pleasure at Talana's praise and secretly hoped to model herself on the self possessed T'lan. Praise from someone she so admired was of immense value to her!

oOoOo

Talana and R'gar also decided to drop in on the Gather with Sagarra. This was the highlight of the year in the High Reaches with more than just a Gather. The lake near the Hold froze solid; and sporting events and skating took place with music from harpers. It was a colourful occasion, and Talana was as excited as Sagarra, never having been. Lanelly declined to come, saying that it was too cold for her bones, which Talana pooh-poohed; but she was adamant. They also took Zaylinda and the young twin cousins Zaynil and Linzayn whom Talana remembered only as irritating brats; but the intervening turns had improved them without diminishing their capacity for mischief and they had a strong sense about them that Talana recognised as potential for Impression. Lindan and Zaylana were happy for their children to have the chance to Impress though they had some misgivings about their younger daughter's happiness. Talana had promised to bring any or all of them straight back home if they wished to leave, and to bring them on visits in any case. She had also pointed out that parents were permitted to watch hatching; and her aunt and uncle were awed at the honour. Thus her cousins were living at the weyr waiting for a clutch. Lord Deckter might have promised no reprisals; but Talana was a realist. He too had his limitations.

The Gather was as exciting as they could have wished, and R'gar hired skates for them all. Amid much laughter they fell about until they got the hang of it, then watched the experts racing across the ice. There were competitions of a sport called curling where heavy stones were glided across the ice to score points by some strange and arcane system that took them the entire match to begin to understand. Then two teams played ice hurley, which appeared to be a contest involving hitting each other with sticks in an attempt to move a smaller puck than was used in curling between a designated pair of goal posts. Lord Bargen came over and greeted them.

"Weyrwoman, you will be pleased to know that Beccon confessed to killing his brother; and because of the recklessness of his use of Thread I had little choice, I felt, but to banish him. I have called a Holders' Conclave in a month's time to discuss a unified policy over the sort of usury his brother was extorting. I was hoping you would come and give evidence?"

"I'd be happy to do so, Lord Bargen." Replied Talana. "If you feel that the Lords Holder will not feel that the Weyr is interfering." F'lar's exhortations about politics kept her cautious.

"Weyrwoman T'lana, this is the business of all in power on Pern. Though I take your point; but if you are merely stating your findings, no-one could quibble with that, could they?" Talana smiled a little cynically; but bowed her head in acquiescence. She knew that with the word of a Queenrider to back his story he would have a better chance of forcing some kind of policy change; providing she said nothing to suggest it was needed!

oOoOo

The family was considering leaving – or at least the adults were – when Talana was accosted by a well-dressed man.

"Would you be Weyrwoman T'lana, the one they say is good at solving mysteries?" He asked

"I an T'lana – and I have solved one or two little problems." She concurred. He grunted.

"Need your services. Name's Gerit, Holder of Ogren." Ogren, Talana recalled was to the north of High Reaches Weyr and to the east, on the northern border with Nabol. It was a small but prosperous hold specialising in fine llama wool. The Holder continued, "My daughter has disappeared. I just returned home to find her gone; so I prevailed upon the green rider stationed at the hold to return me to seek you out. I trust you'll be able to find her quickly, she's due to be married to Lord Aven."

Talana bristled a little at the man's tone; but it could be concern for his daughter hidden in trivialities so she said nothing, especially if a girl's life might be at stake.

"Very well, I'll come." She said. She reached out to the dragon he had indicated, a very young Green whose rider was gaining experience by being at a hold. The impression that she gained of Holder Gerit was that the rider, T'gref liked him not at all; and Reeth was not happy about the way she was treated as a beast of burden. Via Reeth she discovered that T'gref had taken no interest in Gerit's daughter and could not even remember what she looked like. He was uninterested in emotional entanglements with either sex just yet. Presumably why he had been sent to such an out of the way place, mused Talana; dragon more mature than the rider. He'd been sent out while she was in the Harper Hall, one of her own batch of weyrlings and a good turn and a half younger than her. He gave her a wave as he took off with Gerit and Mirrith took the co-ordinates from Reeth and followed smoothly.

She barely had time to greet T'gref before Gerit hustled her in. His lady wife welcomed Talana warmly and offered her klah or Tillek wine.

"Klah, please." Said Talana. "It's too cold for anything else." She held her hands to the fire roaring in the big fireplace. "I'll like to see your daughter's room as soon as possible if I may; it may give me some ideas. What is her name?"

"Geriana" answered the girl's mother. "She went to her room soon after the midday meal; but she seems to have gone out. She went down and saddled a llama. The groom did not go with her. My husband has already chastised him." Her voice was colourless. "I expect she has got lost somewhere. If she has had the sense to shelter it will be almost impossible to find her. It has been snowing today and there are no tracks visible now."

"The weyrwoman is bound to be able to find her from dragonback and bring the silly chit back." Said Gerit confidently.

"Let me see her room and I can see what chance there is of that." Talana said.

"Her room? Wherry teeth woman, she's not in her room! She's out there somewhere!" Shouted the Holder. Talana looked at him.

"I'm sure concern has made you forget your manners." She said coolly. "But what Geriana has with her may give me a vital clue as to where she may be headed and why: and whether she has with her enough warm clothing to survive."

Holder Gerit subsided slightly muttering something about 'women' and 'clothes on the brain' and retired in poor temper, leaving his wife to conduct Talana to Geriana's room.

Talana searched in vain for certain items she would have expected to find in a woman's chamber; and noted also that the clothes press was not over filled. The bed was covered with a light embroidered coverlet only. She picked up a heavy roll of fine hides and unrolled it to reveal a series of extremely competent drawings and paintings of local mountain scenery, including an old volcanic peak, much weathered, with a lake in the caldera, almost a miniature weyr. It appeared in different seasons and from variations of angle, and one summertime sketch from within the old crater. There appeared to be some erasure by the cliff wall; and peering closely, Talana reckoned some dark feature had originally occupied the place. She re-rolled the pictures but seemed to forget to replace them.

"Your daughter is a talented artist." She said. The lady smiled.

"Yes, she spends many hours sketching on wood, stone and hide. My husband thinks it a waste of time as does her future husband; but I have some say in this hold." Talana felt she was having some kind of message conveyed.

"Geriana's betrothed – tell me about him."

"He is one of Fax's side issues." She said, tight lipped.

"Your daughter is high spirited?"

"Extremely."

"Then" said Talana "I think I can promise you that it is extremely unlikely that I will be able to return her to the bosom of her family. The conditions are very harsh; even without the dangers of Threadfall, it would be impossible to guarantee survival. The nights are too cold for anyone to live – unprotected."

"Will you be able to let me know?" her mother picked things up quickly.

"T'gref's Reeth is a clutch mate of Mirrith." She assured the woman. "Communication between them is easy."

oOoOo

Talana told Holder Gerit much the same; that survival under such conditions were difficult.

"Moreover" she added "Since the girl appears to have fled, it's not my part to return her to where she is apparently unhappy. If you've given her cause to flee and she is dead, it is on your conscience."

Gerit blustered and swore, threatening to expose her to T'bor and F'lar and Lord Holder Bargen. Talana listened unmoved.

"My duty is to protect." She said. "Not to help you oppress. If the girl had committed some crime I might reconsider, depending on what she had done. As it is, I wish her luck." And she turned on her heel and left. She told T'gref on the way out, "He'll be sending you with a letter of complaint to T'bor presently. Tell T'bor I'll explain later."

oOoOo

High into the night air on Mirrith she unrolled the pictures again, having walked out with them still in her hand.

"Given that she dare not be more than three hours form the place " she mused "in order to reach it in daylight and set up house – presuming she'd had the sense to arrange firewood at the time she first painted this – she'll not have been there long. Mirrith, is this a good enough visualisation for you?" She showed the little queen her visualisation of the caldera made a nightime winter scene. "Bit of a repetition really" she grinned, remembering that wild, desperate flight on Laranth.

"The visualisation is very clear. Are we going there?" Mirrith asked; and as Talana assented, transferred Between.

oOoOo

The thin wisp of smoke from the ancient crater might have been a sign that the volcano was once again active; but the faint smell of woodsmoke as Mirrith circled round belied that notion. The crater it came from may have been a distant secondary cone for the High Reaches magma chamber; it was certainly not to the same scale. It would weyr perhaps five or six dragons at a pinch; Mirrith declared it was just a nice size for her and Laranth. It had a small tarn – Mirrith-sized as the young dragon was quick to point out – by the broken edge. This apparently drained slowly down the mountain, for a narrow waterfall was caught in a fine column of ice like the twisted glass stems of fine wine glasses, glistening in the light if the moon Timor. The frozen lake shone with the moon's silver radiance, making the miniature bowl quite light. Talana directed Mirrith in to land as quietly as she could, and made her way to the cave she had suspected existed.

Inside the cave a fur-clad figure was cooking on a crackling fire which was her only light; a llama was tethered at the other end of the substantial cavern.

"Geriana, I presume." Said Talana. The figure jumped, spilling the pot of food, and assumed a defensive posture. "Oh, don't worry." Talana continued. "I'm not about to take you back to your father nor to Fax's spawn. I'm a dragonrider. I'm here to offer you the choice between coming to the Weyr, and staying here. If you decide to stay put, I or someone I trust, will drop in on you from time to time to see that you're all right."

Geriana stared at her open mouthed for a minute.

"How did you find me?" She asked.

"Your paintings." Talana waved the bundle. "If you did come to the Weyr, you'd have a guaranteed job painting places as a visualisation for people to go to. Mirrith was easily able to bring me between to here using those paintings. And if you have the imagination to change the season of a scene – why, you'd be invaluable!" She finished enthusiastically.

"I – I don't know." The girl said. "It's nice being my own person – doing what I want for a change. Do you see?"

"Of course. And it's your decision. Though if you stay here, I'd be grateful to commission you to paint for us just the same – maybe we could pay you in provisions?"

Geriana thought about it. She had absorbed plenty of economic lessons living in an isolated hold, and she realised that whilst she could probably survive, she could do even better if she had a means of barter.

"Very well." She said. "Would the offer of transfer to the Weyr still stand if I could not survive on my own here?"

"Certainly. I notice you've been preparing for a while though, so I should imagine you'll do well. Was that a vegetable plot I saw outside?"

"Yes, I brought some seeds and plants up when I first found this place. Father's been talking about finding me a husband for some time. Lord Aven is a pig and he won't let me draw; so as he's fixed the wedding, I left. I'm only afraid he might come looking."

"Not without these" grinned T'lan, tossing her the pictures. "Besides, I told him anyone out unprotected overnight was bound to die of exposure. He'll be furious, but you're more or less officially dead."

Geriana heaved a sigh of relief; and again Talana was grateful for Sarel. Why this girl's blood father cared less for her than ever Talana's foster father had done. Sarel could be bullied, but he'd never have considered her as an asset, a chattel for disposal to make alliances.

oOoOo

Back in the weyr, Talana told R'gar about Geriana.

"I think she'll do a good job of surviving" she told him. "And she needs the time to find herself. But it's my belief she could Impress, she's got the strength of will, and she didn't react too badly to Mirrith. She was startled of course; but she did not give ground. I thought to invite her to some hatchings if she doesn't join us anyway and see what happens."

"Is that entirely moral?" He asked.

"Maybe not; but the dragonets need to be given the widest possible choice."

R'gar laughed.

"Has anyone ever told you that you're devious, my love?" He asked. She grinned unrepentantly.

"I've been taking lessons from Pilgra." She declared.

oOoOo

Talana was taken aback to waken next morning feeling horribly nauseous. In fact she barely made it to the necessary in time. When she had sorted herself out she asked Mirrith for a lift across the bowl to go and see Calla.

"Hmmm." Said Calla. "You and R'gar er, celebrated your homecoming enthusiastically, I suppose?"

"Well – yes." Talana blushed. Calla thought it sweet that she still could.

"Seems like typical morning sickness to me." She told the girl. Talana stared at her in near horror.

"I thought it got harder to get pregnant the more time you spent Between!" she said.

"It does. But some people are more fertile than others. And I remember you mentioning that twins run in your family and you cousin Lindanna has a baby a year. These things are carried on the female side, you know."

Talana sat down heavily.

"No bad Threadfall for the first trimester – that's handy, anyway." She muttered. "And Mirrith will soon be too egg-full to go Between anyway. Lord Bargen's hosting the meeting he wants me to attend and that's easy straight flight. Could be a lot less convenient."

Calla laughed.

"That has to be a first for babies. In my experience, they're as inconvenient as possible." Laughed Calla, and hugged her. "Congratulations – at least, I hope so."

"Oh yes!" said Talana. "I was just a bit taken aback. I wasn't sick with the twins, though." She added, puzzled.

"All pregnancies are different. Maybe that's all it is; maybe it's a girl and you carry boys better. Maybe it's because you've been flitting about Between a bit too close to the danger period."

Talana nodded.

"Thanks Calla, I appreciate it. Sorry to be a worry wherry."

"Always ask, girl. I'm always here."

oOoOo

R'gar was also taken aback; but happy.

"Although" he said, "If you're not certain about it, a few flights between right now…"

Talana gave him an old fashioned look.

"I'll be sterile soon enough." She said. "Let's not waste what we're offered. Besides, it would go against what we said to T'mon. If it dies, that's the way it is; if it lives – and putting up with me going between suggests it wants to – it deserves me taking care of it."

oOoOo

Weyrbound again, Talana turned again to her mathematics for solace, restudying the figures Masterminer Nicat had produced for stress and strain calculations. She was hoping to extend them to woods; and especially to study the ironwood, which she had heard grew in Southern. R'cal had regaled her with fisherman's tales as soon as he found that she was interested; and Talana suggested to Pilgra that, as the weyrcarpenter was retiring anyway, a forward looking Journeyman woodcrafter who would not be averse to experimenting would be a rather good idea. And a trip to Southern with R'cal using visualisation from the fishercraft boy who'd been brought in by him on search….

Pilgra laughed.

"I can tell you're pregnant" she said. "You get this fix-it fixation. Well, it's not unreasonable. And High Reaches is one of the few places Bendarek could send a progressive young journeyman. I'll see to drafting a message and leave it to you to corrupt R'cal and what's his name."

"Vargion." Replied Talana. "He's distantly related to Masterfisher Idarolan."

There's going to be more about Geriana in the future.