Wow. Just wow. You guys are so awesome. Update 100% dedicated to my reviewers, for my 100th review! It's shorter than any other chapter (except the prologue) but you're getting it in only one day! That's gotta count for something, right?
- -
Zack was most definitely not nervous. Or stressed. Or seeking out trouble just to get his mind off of his little blond friend, who was currently going through the Trial. Well, he wasn't seeking out trouble any longer, since Angeal had roped him into a practise mission.
Not that the trial (which was capitalized only in Zack's mind) was anything to be particularly worried about since the only cadets put through it were cadets the teachers and instructors genuinely believed had enough potential to be in SOLDIER. They wouldn't be wimps and they wouldn't be stupid, but... well, kids of that age (and Zack conveniently forgot he was still the same age) had a tendency to be... short-sighted. And jealous of other cadets with talent, something he himself was perhaps more aware of than most. He had been able to diffuse most of his own situation by being open and welcoming of everyone, but Cloud, while he didn't exactly have superiority complexes as such, was just a lot more... private.
And now he was out there with four other cadets all primed for the SOLDIER program and probably more proud of it than they really ought to be.
At least the kid could fight, Zack reassured himself. The fact that he had very nearly taken two Thirds down with a practice sword had made the rounds all over ShinRa, not just in the cadets' or SOLDIERs quarters, but among the Turks and the corporate offices as well. Not that he exactly knew what went on among the Turks, but it would be logical that they knew about it, since they knew everything else that went on in the entire rest of the world.
So no, Zack was absolutely not nervous for the sake of his friend and if Angeal gave him one more of those amused little smirks he saved for these occasions, so help him, Zack wouldn't be responsible for the consequences.
"Zack, focus!"
He huffed, annoyed. He was really trying, too. It was just that the mission prospective SOLDIERs went on was on their own. Almost. And he knew Jaeger, and Jaeger was, well, not as good as him (something he could admit without feeling superior in any of the wrong ways, thank you very much) but reliable nonetheless, but he also had a really sick sense of humour.
Worrying wouldn't do any difference on the field anyway.
"Wutai troops," he mumbled to himself, ploughing through another battalion. "Not as easy to defeat in reality," he continued, reciting to keep his mind on the simulation. "There's no space for individuality or creative thoughts in a simulated environment. Mission parameters is not to defeat them, but to get through them, getting what they're guarding, then return to rendezvous. Simple."
Annoyed with himself, he barged through the last line of Wutaian soldiers.
- - -
Hojo hated being summoned by the president. It took time away from his experiments and more often than not, he was in the middle of something highly delicate that his incompetent assistants could in no way be trusted with.
And even so, the president felt it necessary to summon the head of his science research division at any inconvenient time of the day to... to chat. He had even had the nerve once to imply that he could always find someone else for the post if Hojo proved too much trouble.
And so, grumbling, sneering at the ridiculous row of well-dressed, overly endowed, incompetent gossiping secretaries President Shinra had at his beck and call, Professor Hojo ascending that last staircase and entered the oversized office supposedly de facto controlling the entire world (except Wutai, but that was being corrected).
"Hojo, how nice of you to come by." The president laughed as though he had made a joke. "How is your research coming along? Nevermind, nevermind." He waved the matter aside as though it didn't matter before Hojo could reply. Not that he had been planning to. "It's going swimmingly as usual, with you as the head, I trust you to do your very best." The indulgent smile grated on Hojo's nerves. The president just refused to care for what he was experimenting with unless it could directly help in his quest to earn more money or acquire more power. Hojo wasn't particularly interested in knowing which of those two were the most important to the president, and he could live with the callous way his research was being treated as long as the president funded his research. Besides, the president had promised him that once those incompetent Turks of his located the Cetra girl, he would be the one to extract her secrets. That was something to look forward to, at least, and not a chance anyone was likely to get outside of ShinRa.
"I heard that we acquired quite the cadet," President Shinra continued, the glint in his eyes calculating. "They say he almost overpowered two Third Class SOLDIERs with a practise sword..." And wouldn't that turn out to be a valuable resource?
"Those rumours are obviously grossly exaggerated," Hojo replied, unruffled.
"He will become a splendid addition to the SOLDIERs. I heard from Lazard that he was recommended by almost all his teachers. The only other one who ever managed this amount of recommendations was Zack Fair." The president was possibly grinning in sheer delight.
"I admit, I fail to see the reason for all this... fuss. It's not like any of them could ever compare to Sephiroth in any case." Sephiroth was going to be a god, Hojo would make sure of it, and then everyone in the entire world would have to acknowledge his genius. And Sephiroth himself would stop telling him how superior Gast had been, the brat would finally show some gratitude for all the things Hojo had done for him.
"No, no, of course not. Sephiroth is perfect. And Angeal and Genesis are almost as good."
Hojo sneered at the mention of Hollander's two brats. They were nowhere near as good as Sephiroth, mentioning them in the same breath shouldn't even happen!
"However, it's always good when we get truly useful additions. I trust you will be the one to administer the mako dose again this year?"
"Of course." Didn't he always?
"Please report directly to me how he takes to the mako."
- - -
Zack came crashing into the medical facility, where the four cadets were being held after their return. They all looked worn and tired, stressed, but otherwise none the worse for wear. But even so. There were only four and they were supposed to be five
Cloud was sitting with his back to the door, slumped in on himself, looking even smaller than his already none-too-impressive five feet and four inches. The medical check up was over, none of them seemed to be suffering from more than bruises and a few scratches, but then again, they had also come home with an impressive back-up of potions, or so Zack had heard.
He walked over to sit on the bed next to his friend, who looked up only once to see who sat down next to him, then looked away. It was worse than Zack had suspected.
"I heard from Jaeger that you blame yourself for... for Jones." Ralph Jones, age seventeen, half a year older than Zack himself. He had known him briefly only because they had been in the same year, had been in the same sword class until Zack had pulled ahead. Jones had always been a little too self-satisfied with his accomplishments, had never been too shy to let people know when he got a good grade or hit the mark. But he hadn't deserved to die for it.
And obviously Cloud felt the same.
"I could have prevented it," the boy finally admitted bitterly.
"How?" He was careful not to put any inflection on the question. No judgement or demand. Just a question. It was a fight for self-control on the SOLDIER's part. He was fairly trembling with the urge to just hug the cadet and tell him there was no way he could have prevented anything and he shouldn't feel guilty and this was supposed to be a happy occasion, damn it! They were supposed to be celebrating that Cloud would join SOLDIER as soon as the facility was set up.
"If... if I had insisted more. The only reason all those Kalm fangs came was because they smelt the rabbits and the blood. I should have insisted they be cleaned as soon as we caught them..."
"Almost twenty Kalm fangs. Zack, I have never seen that many Kalm fangs in one place."
"Cloud," he began, but was interrupted when a stocky fellow stomped over, glaring down at his companion. Cloud lifted his face slowly and was met with a resounding slap. Cloud blinked and lifted a hand to his cheek.
"Don't be stupid, Cloud!" The stocky guy all but growled. "Jones was bein' ridiculous. 'S not that I thin' he deserved to die or anythin'," here his eyes flickered, as though the mere idea made him feel guilty, "But 't was his watch. He should've raised the alarm 'fore the thrice darned monsters crept up on us, Planet knows their eyes are glowy enough in the dark so's possible. He didn't raise the alarm! And Omdahl and Jaeger agreed that they got him from behind! If you hadn't been there, if you hadn't been so goddamn fast, they could've gotten us before we had had the time to get our weapons, so you just stop your damn, idiotic self blaming and look up with pride, you hear?!" And after a few seconds of staring (glaring) into Cloud's shocked eyes he stalked back to his bed and sat down in a huff.
Zack grinned. So maybe literally slapping sense into people weren't exactly his style, but obviously the fellow had liked Cloud and had wanted to help. And that rant had been impressive all on its own.
Besides, being careful and sensitive wasn't exactly his style either, so while Cloud was still trying to make his friend's words fit with the universe and how it was supposed to work, Zack stealthily reached out and then pulled a squawking cadet into a tight hug, ruffling his hair for good measure. "He's right, you know. Beating yourself up over things you can't change will only drag you down. Just gotta do better next time, right? And now you know to stand your ground."
"I... I guess," Cloud answered, still sounding a little hesitant, but mostly like he had just been hit over the head with a brick.
"Damn right you do. So how does it feel to be accepted into SOLDIER? I'm gonna have to ask you again when you've got your shots of course, but right now I'm too curious to wait."
"Huh? SOLDIER?"
"Uh, yeah? Yanno, the whole reason you signed up for the army?"
"I made it into SOLDIER? Already?!"
"Uhm, duh? Why'd you think they dragged five of the best cadets into the wilderness and had them track home? Oh, the other group came home two days ago, but then their mission was different, can't be helped. They've already been initiated. Sleeping it off now, but we'll have a party once you're all up again to celebrate!"
"A party?" Cloud's mind was having a little bit of trouble catching up. He had been caught up in his own guilt, what? Three minutes ago? And now he was in SOLDIER. In SOLDIER!
The slow smile began stretching his face before he caught himself, thinking of Jones. It felt a little bit wrong, being so happy when Jones hadn't made it. Even if he didn't blame himself (and he didn't, not very much at least, not any more because... well, Zack and Abbing was right, damn them both) he was still getting something Jones had obviously been looking forward to and it just felt like... forgetting him to allow the sheer wonder of the knowledge that he had actually made it into the program to overwhelm him.
"Hey." Zack nudged him carefully in the ribs. "It's okay to be happy. Doing better next time is enough to prove you haven't forgotten."
"You sure?"
He was abruptly dragged into a headlock as Zack began rubbing his knuckles harshly along his scalp. "Are you doubting your superiors, you little midget?"
"Ow, Zack, stop it!"
"Are you doubting your superiors?"
"No, Zack. Planet, I'm gonna go bald!"
Zack immediately let go, grinning. "No, we cant have that. Your boyishly good looks would be completely ruined." He couldn't stop grinning though, thinking of a balding Cloud.
Cloud huffed and tried to flatten his now even wilder hair. Not that it was any use of course.
Dr. Ann Bowen entered the room, which immediately fell completely silent. "Hello boys, no Zack, don't even think it." She consulted her clipboard, more to avoid Zack's grinning eyes than any real need to reread it. "As you're all aware of, I'm sure, you've been chosen for the SOLDIER program. You've been detained here until the facility has been made ready for you to take the prescribed mako shots to enter SOLDIER. You'll each be given individual rooms for the procedure, so follow me, please." She waited politely until they each got up, then turned and walked out the door.
Zack shot Cloud a thumbs up as he looked back. His encouraging smile slipped away though, as soon as Cloud had disappeared out the door. The 'procedure' was painful. And risky. And Cloud already had an acute case of latrophobia.
He just hoped his friend could keep it together long enough to go through with the shots.
- - -
A few minutes later in a sterile, one-bed room Cloud was having much the same thoughts. He was desperately clinging to rational thought as some medical assistant or other tried to explain to him the process (something about syringes and mutations of muscle tissue and that they were taking every safety precaution available). He signed the papers handed to him with slightly shaking hands, although his signature was no more unreadable than usual.
Then he was asked to lie down in the bed and relax. He got as far as lying down, at least, but relaxing wasn't quite possible with panic threatening to wrest control from him.
He did his best not to look at the numerous machines placed against the walls, grit his teeth and asked them what was taking so long. They answered that Professor Hojo was the only doctor in the facility allowed to administer mako to the prospective SOLDIERs, as he was the expert and the one who had created the process in the first place.
Gritting his teeth some more he prepared to wait until Professor Hojo (did the head of the Science Research Department really oversee all SOLDIERs?) decided to come along.
He didn't have to wait very long, luckily, although in the state of mind he was in, the few minutes stretched into aeons.
When Hojo entered, though, he wished he had a little longer to wait. His panic sky-rocketed, coursing blindly just under the thin screen of control he kept and the only reason he was even able to keep that control was because he had realised with sudden clarity that he could not under any circumstances allow the thin, bespectacled man standing just inside the doorway to see how scared he was.
The thought was entirely illogical; there was nothing to set Professor Hojo apart from any of his lab assistants, except that he was perhaps older than them, there was no reason why the sound of his steps as he neared the bed where Cloud was lying, one of the assistants following with a tray with three green-glowing syringes in his hands, should fill him with such absolute dread.
Sweat beaded on his forehead, a drop running into his hair.
"No reason to be that nervous, boy," the scientist said, his oily voice causing a shudder to go through Cloud's body before he got it under control again.
He was lying perfectly still as Hojo took a blood sample, was lying perfectly still as the syringes were inserted into his veins, one after the other, and was lying perfectly still as a faint itch, like that of a healing scratch erupted all over his body.
Then the mako hit in truth.
- - -
"Like you've been there!"
"Give me the pleasure of taking it away."
"I want to meet... you."
"...An informed question, but difficult to answer. I am what you..."
"...You are just a puppet."
"You were too!"
"...Spiky headed jerk. One more time!"
"...'Til we get to the end of the line."
- - -
"His heart is palpitating!"
"What went wrong? How far along in the process is he?"
"Ridiculous. Just a failure."
- - -
"Strength without determination means nothing..."
"You're... the proof that I existed."
"Get out of my way, I'm going to see my Mother!"
"You're so cute, Miss Cloud."
- - -
"He's going into cardiac arrest!"
"Clear!"
- - -
"All it takes for your dreams to come true is money and power."
"Elena, you talk too much."
"...Frozen in time..."
"If this is all a dream..."
"Dilly-dally shilly-shally."
- -
NOTE: All quotes were taken from FFVII: Crisis Core, FFVII, FFVII: Advent Children and Advent Children Complete. I have a single of quote from the Japanese version of CC because it sounds better. I did my best to not just take all the melodramatic quotes XD
I got a hold of the soundtracks of Crisis Core and Advent Children. I'm so happeh! ;_; (those are happy tears XD) It helps me write.
Oh yeah, and reason number 2 why it's so short is because it's just a brilliant place to end a chapter.