*** Saturday April 4, 2009 *** Important Note: I've changed this chapter. I wasn't happy with it. I felt the previous chapter was weak and the scene deserved better. This is the scene I originally wanted to write…but I chickened out, basically. This new rewrite has a provocative scene as befitting the sensual nature of the vampire. And although I don't think it any worse than some of the racier scenes that Meyer wrote in her last two novels, 13 and older, please. OTM

In the Grip of Twilight

By:

Olivia Tannis Moore

Chapter Forty

Week One, Day One

"Becoming"

Go on infect me…

Go on and scare me to death…

I'll be your victim

You'll be the voice in my head.

You could give me anything but love…

Anything but love

----"S.O.S" ("Anything but Love") --Apocalyptica

Demetri looked at me in horror. "You're not serious."

"There has to be a reason why Thaddeus' writings are locked up," I argued.

He put his hands on his hips. "Would you stop and think that maybe Thaddeus didn't want anyone reading his life work? And if that's the case, perhaps he was the one that requested the volumes be locked away?"

I shook my head stubbornly. "Why go to the trouble of writing everything down if no one will be allowed to read it?"

Demetri's gaze swept the chamber nervously. "I can think of one good reason," he whispered. "It was personal. Not everyone is eager to have what amounts to a diary read by others."

"I don't think…"

"Drop it, Bella," he said under his breath. And I fell silent, realizing he didn't want to discuss it out loud, that it was dangerous to do so.

"Let's just go," I said. "I'm ready to get this over with."

We passed the chained bookcase on the way to the staircase and I glanced at the thick links of chain and the heavy padlock. Could a vampire's strength break the chain? Was it the chain and padlock, or the fear of Aro's vengeance that kept anyone from trying?

We walked back to the stone staircase in silence, and once there, Demetri unrolled his cloak and slipped it on. Then he turned to me and held out his hand, mouthing the word, "Venom".

I fished the vial from my pocket and held it tightly for a moment. Then I looked him in the eye. "I'm trusting you," I said, opening my hand and allowing him to take the vial.

His face was serious, "I know."

We went down another three flights of stairs and then the stairs ended unexpectedly at a stone wall. In the center of the wall, a single iron gate stood open and waiting for us. We entered yet another room, stark white and longer than it was wide. Gold- trimmed chairs lined the walls, as if it were a waiting area. At the opposite end of the room, two guards flanked a set of white double doors. Upon seeing Demetri, they immediately turned to face one another, each pulling his door open wide for us to enter.

"We're here," Demetri said in a low voice as we walked through the doors.

The room was gloomy with only the flicker of a few candles in the distance. The air was also much cooler, and damp. Demetri offered me his hand and I grasped it tightly. And as my eyes adjusted to the dim light I realized that we weren't actually in a room at all—but we were walking the ledge of an enormous cavern. I froze, as I now saw that my feet were on chiseled rock and far too close to the inky darkness.

Demetri tugged on my hand, but I couldn't move. My stomach rolled with the thought of stumbling off the narrow ledge and into that sea of black.

Demetri raised our joined hands in front of my face, his grip strong and reassuring, "I've got you."

I swallowed hard and nodded. I longed to close my eyes, but that would bring absolute darkness, so I concentrated on the candlelight ahead and moved along at Demetri's side, each step bringing us closer to the flickering lights.

We reached the table with the tall candelabras and I sighed with relief, but then I groaned. The candles marked the beginning of the wide staircase that led down to the floor of the cavern. There were no handrails, just countless steps that seemed to float out over the darkness, carved from the bowels of the cavern itself. I shuddered. Below, I could see sporadic tiny pinpoints of light, and here and there I thought I could see the faint outline of something or someone shifting about in the shadows, but nothing else.

In the candlelight Demetri's eyes searched my face. "Come on, climb on my back; it's faster." And then he adjusted the cloak around the both of us, as he lifted me onto his back. I didn't protest, but wrapped my arms about his neck gratefully.

Then, without warning, he stepped off the ledge.

I closed my eyes and felt the air rush past my face and whistle through my ears. It was as if we were free-falling down through the center of the cavern, the cloak whipping up and trapping air beneath it like a parachute. There seemed no time to contemplate the length or depth of our descent, as our landing at the bottom of the cavern was astonishingly sudden… and soft.

I opened my eyes to see Aro standing before us, smiling widely, while Caius and Marcus stood a few feet behind him, expressionless. And behind all three, a strange rudimentary altar stood; like the jutting stairs, it seemed to be part of the cavern. Groups of white candles were arranged along the altar's length. For a moment I clung to Demetri's back, feeling safer there in the presence of the three; and also because I was afraid my legs wouldn't support me right away after the flight from the ledge.

Demetri stood patiently, until I didn't dare hesitate any longer and whispered, "Okay". He bent until my feet touched the floor, steadying me with his arm. I thanked him. He smiled shyly—making my heart skipped a beat.

I turned to Aro, suddenly eager to do what I'd come to do, reminding myself of who I was going home to. Like Dorothy before the Wizard and there's no place like home.

"Bella…" he greeted me, saying my name as if one long sigh.

"Aro," I replied. I tried to smile, but managed only an odd little smirk.

My lack of politeness didn't seem to bother him. His smile never faulted as he stepped forward and took my hand. "I hope you are rested."

I nodded, knowing the bluish smudges under my eyes said differently.

"Demetri, if you would bring the tray," Aro requested, keeping his eyes on my face.

He returned within seconds. A white cloth lay folded across the wooden tray; it spilled over the edges, luminous in the dim light.

"Take it, my dear," Aro cooed.

My mind raced as I brooded over what could be under the cloth. My hand was pale and looked as if it didn't belong to me, as I reached out, trying not to quiver, to pull the cloth away.

It was silk and I had to pinch the material to keep it from sliding from my fingers. But when I lifted it from the tray, there was nothing underneath. And then I realized that the cloth I held up was actually a robe. Looking closer, I saw that it was simple in design with no buttons or ties down the front.

I gazed pointedly at the dark cloaks that Aro and the others were wearing, the silver skulls gleaming back at me, and then I held up the white robe. "It looks very…sacrificial."

Aro leaned his head back and laughed; for the first time Marcus and Caius grinned. But Demetri's face had taken on a hard edge as if he found nothing funny about my comparison.

"Nothing as sinister as that, I assure you," Aro said. He then indicated that I should put it on.

It was incredibly light and filmy as I put it on over my clothes; its length covered the top of my shoes and wasn't as tailored as the dress he'd given me for the party. I found myself wondering who had worn it before…predator or prey?

Aro clapped his hands together loudly, startling me. "Shall we begin?"

Caius turned and went to the altar, coming back with a violin and bow, which he promptly handed to Demetri.

Holding the instrument in one hand, Demetri leaned over and brushed my hair back from my neck. He placed the tips of his fingers against the side of my throat where my pulse pounded wildly. "This is where I'll go in."

Worried, I gazed down at the scars on my palm; they would be very noticeable on my throat.

As if reading my concern, Demetri shook his head. "This time there'll be no scars."

He then reached up and gently closed my eyes with his thumbs. "The Thames," he whispered in my ear.

I nodded.

And then he began to play.

***

On the hillside overlooking the misty Thames River, I was alone.

In the distance I could hear the faint music of the violin; the breeze seemed to bring it closer then drag it away as if it were the tide. I waited, expecting Demetri to join me at any time. But after several minutes went by, and he didn't appear, I grew restless and began walking toward the river banks. My mind was preoccupied with what was going on back there in the cavern. Had it begun yet? My hand went up to my throat, not knowing what I would feel there.

I felt nothing, not the pleasure, nor the burning, nor the pressure of Demetri's mouth…

It was if this place had cocooned me against the nightmare. If Demetri was trying to spare me the trauma of the ritual, he was succeeding. At least this way I wouldn't be aware of Aro and the others watching me, or know the intimate details of Demetri's embrace. Perhaps I would return to find the process over…

…but that wasn't the case.

The music faded until I could no longer hear it at all. And then the ground seemed to tremble, but when I looked down it was my legs that shook. I swayed, unable to keep my balance. I sat down at the river's edge; my breath quick and shallow as if I'd just ran a mile.

There was the briefest sting, then numbness spread along the base of my throat, and with a sinking heart, I knew it was just beginning.

I wasn't as alone as I'd thought.

Although I couldn't see him, I felt Demetri's presence; it was suddenly there in the strength of his hands around my upper arms, holding me against him. It was in the cool wispy graze of his hair against the hollow of my neck, across the wing-like ridge of my collarbone… In my ear I heard his deep intake of breath as he inhaled my scent and held it, his hands contracting around the flesh of my arms as he struggled with an inner need to possess me.

"Don't…" I whispered. But I had no idea if the plea made it past my lips.

Locked tightly in his embrace, I could feel his restraint coil about me…the pain it caused him. His moan-like whispers drifted in and out of the corners of my mind like ghosts.

He pressed my back to the grassy bank. And then with a blood-curling growl of determination, he pulled his mouth from my throat. And then before I could regain my senses, he dove into my throat again, releasing the fiery venom that burned a trail down my neck and shoulders.

I tried to ignore the heat building along my skin, running the length of my body. But the burning pleasure would not be denied. My blood seemed to rush toward this unseen invader…dance along side it…the merest touch bringing an insatiable need for more—more, more, more, until I could have screamed from the want of it.

In my contortions, I had no control. My fingers clawed into the ground and then closed into fists; my back arched ever higher and higher, until I feared it might snap. My blood raced with the venom in an effort to join with it; I urged it on, faster and faster. The taste of familiarity was electrifying—I would have chased it forever. Every cell in my body knew Edward's venom and yearned for it.

His image and memories flickered across my mind as if on a movie screen: Edward in turn-of-the-century clothing, his hair a coppery-bronze…his eyes as green as the hillside. Laughing, running down the cobblestone road, his life sped past with lightning speed, finally coming to rest on a narrow bed in a hospital ward. His cough and wheezing breath seemed to be my own.

I watched as Carlisle entered the room and stood beside the bed; he hesitated as if contemplating something. He ran his hand across Edward's forehead, and then looked over at the next bed with its sheet drawn over the still form. Then he leaned down, his face coming closer and closer, blocking out the overhead light.

Edward's confusion, his horror, became indistinguishable from my own for the briefest of moments…

Then the darkness engulfed me.

***

(Thanks for reading.)