Lush
Chapter Six:
[Matsumoto]
Nothing is greater than stepping into the garden early in the morning. This is something I hardly ever do, but this morning, I stepped out into the garden barefooted. It was cool and very relaxing. I have been feeling tense these days. Too tense, one would say. But of course, no one can really see that I am suffering over him. Or suffering for that matter.
Some would say that I am strong. Others would say that I could hold up my own. And I can, but it doesn't look that way anymore. I don't turn to crying but feels like that such a result is drawing near.
I sat on a bench in the garden, the morning dew putting moisture onto my clothing.
The sky was beautiful. I envied it. The sky could fall and rise everyday, looking so beautiful. It was something that I could achieve not. I don't mean to depress myself but a thought like this comes to mind. Thanks to Gin.
The man's not around and yet he depresses me.
I'm… so done with him. I don't want him anymore. "So, what do I do?"
Asking the sky won't do any justice.
"Rangiku!"
My eyes dropped from the sky and to the figure that was running towards me. By the figure and the voice, I knew who was running to me. Renji. His voice was distant but I could hear a tad of excitement in his tone. At the same time, it felt like he was coming to me with bad news.
The closer he got, the more nervous I grew. I was a little uneasy once he was a meter away.
"What's wrong, Ren—"
My question was cut short once I was caught in Renji's embrace. He was holding me pretty tight even though I could tell he was totally out of breath.
"Renji. What's going on?" I asked. He didn't say anything at first. The only thing I heard was the sound of his heart beating fast.
"I just… needed to see you." He said. His voice was a bit shaky. I didn't want to believe that he was crying before he got here. But did it really matter if he was or not? My job at that moment was to be his rock. It was my job to support him in every way possible. This either didn't burden me. I was glad to be by his side.
Finally, I rested my head on his chest, hearing the beats of his heart slow. He was calming down. That's good.
There must be a reason why he's behaving this way. The first thing that came to mind was Rukia? Did something happen between the two?
"Rukia… she doesn't want me. She doesn't love me. She… doesn't need me." He finally said in a low tone of voice. Just as I expected. It WAS about Rukia. This poor man's heart is broken.
I was the first one he turned to. I'm glad.
"Do not despair, Renji. Everything happens for a reason."
He pulls away from me and sits on the bench that I was once sitting on. "I guess you're right about that."
I sat beside him and grabbed a hold of his hand. I not the 'touchy' type but it seems that Renji really needed support. He looked so down, it was beginning to frighten me.
"Look on the bright side, you have me. You know I'll do anything for you." I said, happily. I meant what I said. I really will do almost anything for him. Renji has become very important in my life.
We needed each other.
And just like that, Renji's eyes turns into my direction. He looks me in the eyes and the color in his eyes grew vivid. I must have cheered him up a bit because he hugged me again.
But this time… the hug was different. The first time he hugged me, was like the hug a mother would hold her child. But the hold that he had on me now was… too much to even describe. His face was buried in my neck and he held me tightly. Almost holding me as if he feared me leaving him.
I would never.
It felt really nice in his arms. He was warm and welcoming. I didn't want him to let go of me. And I was sure he wished that as well.
"I wish… I could stay like this." I heard him say. "You are… too kind to me. Rangiku."
"No. You're too kind. I couldn't have asked for anyone by my side right but you, Renji. Only… you."
There was a slight pang in my chest. It was a feeling that felt familiar. It was this feeling I got when I was filled with… exhilaration. I was in high spirits.
Oh, Renji… You make me smile again.
"Thank you. For being here." He said, still holding onto me.
And although we didn't talk much about why he was feeling so down, the power of our very long embrace made everything all right. As for me, I feel like myself again. The last person that was on my mind was Gin.
He was beginning to fade away.
I didn't want him anymore.
I just needed my friend, Renji, by me and I will feel whole again.
A/N: Short and sweet. REVIEWS PLEASE! I think I rush this one a bit. My atmosphere is a bit loud. I think effected my mood :(