THIS CHAP IS ONLY IN LEAH'S POV

NEXT ONE WILL BE DIFFERENT

It had stopped raining as I pulled up to the small shack that Jacob calls home. Seth was awake this time, barely, and kept asking what this was all about. I tried to tell him I knew as much as him but he just went on talking and figuring out why they haven't included him in the first place. I eventually tuned him out, and went to fixing my damp hair in the sun shade mirror. I tired to part it to one side so not so much frizz would show but that ended up making it look like I have a cow lick, so I just brushed the knots out with my fingers and left like that. My make up was another thing. Black eyeliner ran down my cheeks mixing in with my blush. I hurried, grabbing a napkin stored in my dash bored and tried rubbing off the clown look.

"Crap", I cursed realizing that my efforts were making matters worse. From the corner of my eye I saw Seth staring at me, amused. "What?" I sneered still wiping my face.

He shook his head. "I don't understand girls. It's just Billy and the rest of the gang. There's no one in there that hasn't seen you in a much worse state. So why even try?"

I didn't answer him, focusing hard on getting rid of the dreadful make up. That was an excellent question that I couldn't answer truthfully to him or even myself for that matter. I felt like I had to impress those people in there no matter what for some reason. No, that wasn't right. I didn't want to impress all of them, just a certain two. I cursed inwardly for the stupid flutter in my heart as I thought of the two in there. Why did I care enough to try to make myself look good to them? I didn't, I kept thinking but lying wasn't working. The truth was that I cared immensely on what they thought about me and how I looked to them. I could admit that while staring steadily at myself in the mirror but what I couldn't bring myself to admit was why.

Sighing, I tossed the napkin aside, giving up at perfecting my damage look. I grabbed my purse and unlocked the car so Seth and I could get out. My heart wouldn't stop pounding with every step I took that brought me closer to the house. At the door, my breathing came through fast and uneven. I stopped mid way from knocking. My hand wouldn't make contact with the wood no matter how much I reassured it that there was nothing special at the other end. It didn't believe me and continued to just hover in a fist.

"You ok?" Seth asked behind me.

I nodded briskly. Lair, I thought.

I heard him sigh and then his hand was the one to knock loudly on the door.

"Geez, if I didn't know better I would have thought you were having a panic attack." His tone was joking but, looking back, his eyes were filled with concern.

I scoffed lowering my hand. "Don't get excited."

We heard the handle wiggle and then turned all the way. I braced myself to see who I hoped didn't open the door. Luckily, Billy was the one to greet us. He smiled up at us his wheel chair stopping the door from closing.

"We thought you weren't going to come." He moved out of the way so we can get through.

Seth yawned stretching his arms. "Sorry Billy. Leah thought she was going to prom or something. She was fixing herself in the car."

I didn't say anything, barely noticing that he even spoke. I scanned the room from left to right and vice versa. It was small so it didn't take me long to figure out who was there and who was not. Sitting on the couch in the small living room was Emily and my mom; there was no one in the kitchen or the hall way to get to the rooms in back. I didn't know if I felt relieved or disappointed.

Billy rolled in the kitchen stopping at the fridge. "You two hungry or thirsty? I've got left over meatloaf or pizza and there's lemonade or water."

Seth was about to except the offer but I stopped him. "No. Thanks Bill but we've got casseroles waiting at home."

He only shrugged and rolled back into the living room.

Seth and I followed squishing in with all the bodies that took up the space. Emily patted the little room between her and my mom for me. I sat down next to them still glancing around expecting one of them to pop out of no where. No one came out of the shadows or walked through the door. I forced my eyes to stay in one spot in front of me, staring out the window. Billy put himself in front of every one looking important and respectably old. My mind was on other things and I tried to calm it so I can listen to what Bill had to say.

"There are many things we need to go over for tonight," Billy cleared his throat then carried on. "First is the two pack issue we have going on."

Seth propped his head up with one had as he sat criss cross in front of me. "Issue? I don't think it's that big of a deal. So there are two packs, so what?"

I kicked him lightly to shut him up. I was trying hard not to say anything too. I didn't think it was a big deal either but I was tired and if I started to talk then other nasty things would come out. In Bill's house, I liked to be quite and respectable. He was old and I felt bad for him.

Emily spoke up next to me. "I agree with Billy. There can not be two packs in one small area. Sooner or later there will be a fight."

I groaned silently. They've been arguing about this for two weeks now and it's always the same thing. It was getting old quickly and my annoyance level was thinning.

"Sam and Jake haven't gotten into an argument or anything. Why can't the two packs just stay here?" I heard the worry in Seth's voice. He knew if Jake had to leave then he'd have to go with him and leave us all behind. But if Sam went then he'll lose brothers and friends.

I raised my hand stupidly but spoke before being acknowledged. "Um yeah, why the hell am I here?"

I didn't ask in the first place because I was respecting Billy and because I didn't want my mom to start something. But I was tired and I wanted to get out of there before they came in.

My mom shot me a warning glance but I ignored it. I didn't need to be included in problems that I left two weeks ago.

Billy smiled. "Because you have something for Emily, don't you?"

I remembered why I went to Emily's in the first place….I opened my purse, digging through all the junk. I cought a look at my phone and saw that I had 5 unread text messages; 2 from my friend Brit and the others form the new hot guy. I wanted to reply and get lost in our own high school world; get involved in the problems and drama that it held. I needed to stop thinking or expecting things that were forbidden to think about or want, but for now it had to wait. Finally I saw the off white envelope with pretty hand writing and an English stamp in the corner. Curiosity consumed me then; I wanted to know what the contents were and who was writing to her. It was not my place to open it though so I handed it over. She stiffly took it and put in her own purse; no thank you or a smile.

My irritability grew. She's been like this since I was changed. It annoyed the fuck outa me but I didn't press it on because I knew how much she was hurting….

I looked back at Billy steadily. "Can I leave now?"

Before he could answer the door opened and two footsteps came in

"Aw, don't go. I promise it'll get good."

I froze completely. My heart skipped 5 beats; I counted, and then continued faster. Danm, I thought, too late. My heart told me to look back and see those eyes, that hair, that tanned skin, but my mind firmly told me to keep staring at Billy. I listened to my mind for once. As they came closer and I cought a whiff of their smells together my chest grew tighter and my breath cought in my throat.

"Even if you don't believe it, we do need your insight and positive thinking." Jacob came to stand next to Billy, resting his hand on his dad's shoulder. His tone had been sarcastic, light and joking even. Usually his tone was serious and monotone, hiding all of his emotions. I never understood that before, I thought he was always going to be boring and harsh. But I now understand because I do it too.

Billy looked up at his son and smiled. "Hungry? Leftovers in the fridge."

"You don't have to tell us twice." In a few steps he was already in the kitchen blowing past Em and I.

I held my breath so not to show any sign of trying to catch it. As he walked by, his elbow brushed my arm, lightly, barely noticeable, but I noticed. A cold shiver ran through me that was both clod and extremely hot. I wondered if he felt it too but he kept on walking not stopping or even looking my way. I tried not to be offended by that.

"You cannot leave yet, Leah. We have much to talk about with you." The deep sweet voice rang in from behind me.

Emily stiffened next to me her eyes narrowing. His voice didn't effect me as mush as Jake's but my heart still skipped. I looked up at Sam's big brown eyes, smiling slightly. When facing Sam I was braver then when I was facing Jacob, only because he had broke my heart once. What harm was a second time? I didn't say anything to him, knowing Em was in enough pain. He patted my head and joined in with Jake at raiding the fridge.

Bill wheeled himself next the arm chair that was placed next to the window, staring out of it. "Paul is not with you?"

"Luckily. We told him to keep watch for another hour. He'll probably come back sooner though." Jake stated with disdain.

Since Paul imprinted with Jake's sister he never stopped coming over. We all thought he would stop when she went back to school but to our misery he kept coming. I was only annoyed because Jacob was which shouldn't even matter.

"So what's the report?" Billy asked still staring out the window.

Sam came to sit next to Seth, who was snoring soundly, with a bottle of water in his hands. "Nothing unusual; some new vampire tracks far north but they were stale. Probably smelt the Cullens and turned to go else where." He opened the bottle and took a huge gulp from it.

"Yeah, we were gonna follow but thought it was pointless. Besides there's a baseball game on tonight that I don't wanna miss." Jake closed the microwave and punched in the time. The hum filled the room sounding like it was gonna break. With that he came and stood next to Em. So close I thought, he's so close….

The meeting went on with less important news. The fact was I didn't need to be there but I couldn't find it to leave. I thought of excuses to use to get out of there, I have school the next day, homework, I smell like a dudes ass crack, but every time I tried to voice these, I saw Sam and Jake. As it grew later and later I finally insisted I had to go. Billy told me that Seth could crash there so I didn't have to worry 'bout waking him and my mom was going to be there 'til later so only me and Em walked out. The cool air washed on my face as we stepped outside. It felt great after being in a stuffy house with people suffocating me. I looked at Emily to see if she felt the same way but her face told me she was not in the mood to chit chat. She started to walk away, towards the empty road, by herself.

My instincts told me to walk away too and drive home but my heart reached out towards her. I mean it wasn't her fault for her behavior, but then again it wasn't mine either.

"Wait, Em, I can give you a ride."

She stopped and half turned towards me, "I'm not some helpless girl. I can walk to my house without help, thank you."

Anger flushed me and it took me a lot not to start a full on cuss war. "Look, I'm truly sorry about what happened. It was unfair and unjust but it happened so you have to deal with it and not drive others away form you." I took a step closer but she took one back

"Just stay out of it Leah," she started walking away again.

I rushed forward and grabbed her arm stopping her. "Hey, I'm just trying to help! I've been trying to help for two weeks now but you won't let me. Please, Em, I'm begging you let me help."

Her eyes turned ice cold. "That's your problem, every time there's a problem you automatically think that you can help and fix every thing. You don't even stop to think that maybe the person doesn't want any help; that maybe they just want to be left alone for some time," she moved closer becoming intimidating. "When things so wrong don't try to be the hero and fix them. You are not a hero and you will never be so stop acting like it." She tugged her arm out of my grip and walked off in the black and dismay.

Danm, shit, fuck, crap!- preveiw

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