Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me. (If it doesn't, a certain thing wouldn't have happened. Ever.)

The last weeks had been busy. My little brother just turned eighteen and in France, it's a big deal! He can vote, drive, buy alcohol, go to clubs, go to prison (lol)... He's an adult!! So we did a big party with family and friends but it took ages to prepare! I scanned all the funny pictures of him baby! He was so cute! His friends were laughing so hard! (If I suddenly disappear, it would mean that my brother decided to take revenge on me and killed me.)

And now, I'm tired and I've got a huge headache but I decide to come and post this chapter.

I have to thanks my beta Ignotus who is doing a wonderful, amazing job and is making this possible!

I let you read now! (and don't forget that little thing called reviewing after. It's feeding my imagination and God knows I really need it these days.)

Chapter Fourteen

Trust

Owen turned his back to her and wrote something down in what she knew was her file. She put her top back on while he spoke.

"There won't be any signs left in a week."

She rolled her eyes. Of course her injuries would disappear in a week. She didn't need him to tell her that. She already knew how fast she healed.

"This was pointless," she groaned.

They had cleaned up the Nostrovite mess during the night and saw Gwen and Rhys' guests out in the morning. Everyone had forgotten what happened. Hopefully, they would think that they had drunk too much. Jack had let them take the day off after that. The next day, when Buffy had showed up, Owen had kidnapped her—literally. He had insisted that he needed to examine her. After a few heated words, she gave up and let him play doctor with her.

He glared at her.

"You work with us so I need to know what happened and how injured you are. Maybe you don't see the point, but I see it and that's what matters."

"Whatever."

She jumped to her feet.

"Can I go now? Are you satisfied?"

He didn't even look up from his file and waved his free hand at her. She felt offended and stuck her tongue out at him. Of course, he couldn't see it. She went looking for Jack. He wasn't anywhere in sight. The door to his office was closed. She looked around, not daring to go in. She wasn't about to barge into his office again after walking in on Ianto and Jack a few weeks ago.

"Hey Tosh? Is Jack in his office?"

The Asian woman looked at her from her computer and smiled. Everyone knew about her misadventure and its consequences.

"In his office. Alone," the computer genius replied.

"Thanks."

She entered, closing the door behind her. Jack was on the phone so she wandered around his office, moving things here and there. She was there for a serious talk. The last two weeks had been hard on her. She had faced her friends, talked to them, been involved in another apocalypse and survived when young girls didn't. She had realized that she couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't fight for this world like before, she couldn't watch girls go to war and perish. It was destroying her, eating away at her slowly. If she didn't stop now, she would go crazy or lose a part of herself, the human part. She felt so old. She was young but already tired of this life. Seeing those two girls being buried and their parents' distress. When they had looked at her, she could see the accusations and hatred in their eyes. What could she do? What could she say to them? Buffy had come into their daughters life and led her to an early grave. She was guilty. And she couldn't bear that guilt any longer

"Buffy?"

She turned towards Jack. He was frowning.

"Are you alright? I called you several times but you didn't respond."

She sat down in front of him.

"I'm sorry. I was thinking."

He sat back, closed the file he was reading and crossed his arms over his chest.

"You didn't answer. Are you alright?"

Was she? When was the last time she had answered positively? When was the last time someone asked her and really wanted to know? She drew her legs under her and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear.

"You know, I can't remember the last time someone asked me that question and really wanted to hear the answer."

"Well I do. So, are you going to answer?"

She locked gazes with him and saw his genuine concern. Her throat tightened.

"I'm not," she croaked.

He just waited and the words fell from her mouth without her being aware of it. She told him about the apocalypse, the many fights, the pressure, the final fight and the loss of two Slayers still in high school. She confessed how tired she was of this life—how it was eating her up. She didn't even know when she broke down, but at some point, she found herself sobbing in Captain Jack Harkness' arms.

As soon as he had seen the first sign of tears, he had rushed to her side and hugged her. He wasn't surprised by this. In his long life, he had learnt a lot about people. When he had seen Summers, he had been impressed by the small woman. She had so much charisma and wit. She was an incredible fighter. But she had hidden her real self. He didn't know if the others were aware of it or not. She was almost always funny and happy but there were times when she was somber or moody. Each time, when she realized it, she would pull herself together and put her mask back in place. However, she didn't—couldn't—fool him. He had lived too long and was too used to that technique. He used it a lot himself. The fact that she broke down in front of him let him know that she trusted him. Or was beginning to, at least. He was well aware that, even if they worked together, there were still wary.

The sound of the door opening made him look up. Ianto was frozen in the doorway, a stack of files in his hands. He said absolutely nothing. Jack shook his head, careful not to disturb the blonde woman still weeping in his arms. Ianto turned on his heels and closed the door.

The sobs had quieted down. Buffy moved out of his arms and avoided his eyes as she sniffled. He let her pull herself together, got up, and went to his desk. He grabbed a handkerchief from a drawer and handed it to her. She took it, mumbling a thanks. He looked away while she blew her nose.

"I'm sorry."

He waved a hand at her apology before sitting in the chair next to her.

"I'm sorry for your loss," he simply said.

When she looked up, she did nothing to hide her pain and her desperation.

"I can't do it anymore. Before, the fact that no one else could do it, that I was the only one with the power to stop them was what helped me move on—was what held me together. I had no choice. But now… All that's left is the pain. And I can't deal with it all now. There's no hope. We're fighting an endless war and I can't be a part of it anymore. I need hope and happiness. I need to do something that I choose to do, not out of duty."

He took her hand in a sign of comfort. He understood her better than she thought. He remembered his own former ideals.

"Working for Torchwood is giving up your life. Gwen's the only one who managed to keep a semi-normal life. We have to deal with difficult cases. We don't win every time. Pain has a big part in this life, but we do this work by choice. Or most of it. The things we see… I don't know about the others but it gives me hope. It amazes me. It shows me each time how large the universe is, how bright it can be. Oh, there are some pretty nasty things out there. But we beat them up. For the sake of the universe, of Earth's future. Because it's worth fighting for. Earth is worth fighting for."

"Were you serious when you offered me that job?"

"Yes, I was."

"Is the offer still good?"

"If you want."

"I've quit the Council."

"You did?"

Jack was surprised. It was one thing to talk about changing careers and quite another to actually quit a ten-year-old job. He didn't like the sound of it. Had she really thought about what she was doing? It wasn't something you did without second thoughts. She was too tired to make such life-altering decision. He sighed.

"Take a vacation. Rest. Then, we will talk about the job."

"I don't need a vacation!"

He smiled. "Ok, first thing firsts: I'm the boss. If I say 'rest' you don't argue and go resting."

She rolled her eyes.

"So, when I say 'Take a vacation', you answer?" he asked.

She did a mock salute. "Yes Sir!"

"That's the spirit!"

She stood up, feeling slightly better. Jack walked her to the lift because he knew Buffy liked this entrance. She hugged him.

"Thanks Jack."

Then, he watched her leave. When she was out of sight, he started to make his way back to his office. But he was stopped by his team. Tosh was looking worried.

"Is she alright?"

He looked at Ianto. The young Welshman shouldn't have talked about the scene he witnessed.

"Things are a little tough for her right now but she'll be okay. Ianto, could you prepare a contract for Buffy? It's not urgent but I want it by the end of the week."

"Is she going to join us?" Owen asked.

"It's probable."

And he disappeared into his office. He didn't close the door because he knew it was only a matter of time before Ianto walked in. And he wasn't wrong.

"Is this a good idea?"

He turned towards the young man. He didn't know why Ianto was the most distant with Buffy. He kept his distance with the woman, talking with her only when it was inevitable. Jack was trying to get them closer by teaming them up. If Buffy was going to work with them, she needed to be trusted by everyone. He had a lot of thinking to do if he wanted to make sure this was a good idea, for them as much as for the Slayer. He closed the door and locked it. Ianto watched him silently.

Jack came closer to him, their faces just inches away. He could feel his hot breath and resisted the urge to kiss those lips.

"You need to trust her," he said.

Anger flashed through his eyes.

"It's not that easy."

"Why? Everyone trusts her."

"But we don't know her!" the Welshman exclaimed while pulling away. "There's so much we don't know and we just go with it. Why? She's not who she pretends to be. Have you seen how cold her eyes can be? And when she asked why we didn't kill the Weevils? Like killing them was nothing. Maybe we need someone who keeps a cool head."

Jack sat on his desk and put his hands in his pockets.

"She comes from a different world. She sees things differently than us."

"About that, how could you not have talked to us about this entirely different world? Demons and magic. You knew about this, right?"

"I'm an old man. So I've run into a vampire or two. But I'm not an expert. I know almost nothing. Just that it exists and that's enough."

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"Why would I have told you? It had been a long time since I had been confronted by the supernatural. I didn't even think about it. Cardiff's pretty quiet in that area."

"Not quiet enough. After all, the Council sent a Slayer."

"The Rift has been really active recently. Because of that, strange things have happened. That's why the Council sent a Slayer. To make sure things weren't supernatural and were being taken care of."

Ianto was silent for a few minutes. He was thinking about what Jack said and what to do with Buffy. Something else was bugging him.

"Why do you trust her so easily?" he asked.

That was not normal. The Captain wasn't the type to trust someone he didn't know. But he had accepted Buffy's presence in their lives, in their workplace without question. There was so much he didn't know but he wasn't asking. His lover sighed.

"Why do you trust me, Ianto?"

The Welshman was taken aback. Why was he asking that question?

"Because I know you. I've worked with you for years now. And you're the head of Torchwood, my boss. And a little more…"

He looked down, cheeks turning slightly pink. Usually, Jack would have made an ambiguous comment. But this was a serious conversation.

"But you don't know me," he declared.

Ianto opened his mouth, ready to contradict him. Jack was faster.

"How old am I? When was I born? What do you know about my past? My family? What did I do before Torchwood? God! What's my real name? Tell me, Ianto Jones, what do you know about me?"

The young man had no response. His mind went blank with the realization that, in fact, he really didn't know anything about the man hiding behind the name of Jack Harkness. Apart from the fact that he couldn't die and was older than he looked. He had shared with him and the team dozens of anecdotes about his life but that was it. Anecdotes. Funny and incongruous snatches of life that hadn't really told them who he really was. If he thought about it, he knew more about Buffy Summers than about his own boss.

When Jack saw that Ianto had understood where he was going, he answered his initial question, "You're right. I don't know a lot about Buffy. But when I look at her, when I'm with her, I recognize myself in her. I see everything I've been hiding for so long. She's like me. Just a lot younger and womanlier. I don't know her. But I understand her. Maybe even better than herself. That's why I trust her Ianto. And why you should as well."

Jack grabbed Ianto by his neck and pulled him closer. The Welshman did nothing to stop him and welcomed the kiss. It was softer than usual but filled with a plea that shook him. He didn't know if he could trust Buffy. However, he was trusting Jack, even with the little information he had on him. So, he was willing to try and trust the American girl.

Their embrace changed as lust emerged from within both men. Things had been so crazy lately that they hadn't had more time for themselves. Ianto pressed himself against his boss as a need to feel more of the other man took hold. He felt Jack's hand loosen his tie. He went for Jack's shirt, quickly and efficiently unbuttoning it.

"Jack, there's a peak in Rift activity!" Tosh almost yelled while knocking on the door.

She didn't even try to enter. Sweet Toshiko. Jack groaned and broke the kiss.

"I'm coming!" he yelled back.

He buttoned his shirt while Ianto expertly redid his tie before straightening his shirt and jacket. Jack grabbed him and kissed him again, hard and quick, before heading to the door.

"Later," he whispered.

He unlocked the door and left:

"So Tosh, what do you have for me?"

Ianto smiled a little at the whispered promise. He followed Jack. If they didn't need him, he would start work on the employment contract for Buffy Summers.

¤ ¤ tbc ¤ ¤